Well, it seems they finally found someone to be on WWHL tonight with Porsha Williams. That unfortunate seat goes to Laverne Cox from Orange is the new black.
First of all, Porsha’s boobs look so much better. They seem to have finally settled and are no longer up around her neck. I love Porsha’s tan dress. It is slit up to her armpit on one side, but she manages to pull it off. I also take back every nice thing I said about her hair on RHOA because Lord have mercy what is that thing on her head? It looks to me like she has shave her whole head a plonked a wig on it only the wig is set about two inches behind her hairline. You can’t tell it in the picture really but the right side she has hair swooping down over her face but on the left side… I mean what is that?
We begin talking about the fact that Sharon has passed. Porsha says she got to know her when she was in Kandi’s play. Porsha talks about her in the present tense.
They talk about Cynthia. Porsha makes no sense. Laverne says that it seems that Peter influences Cynthia’s opinions on Nene. Imagine that a wife who listens to her husband and values his opinion rather than emasculating him on TV.
Are you seeing anyone and is it true you have a sugar daddy? Also known as, everyone is talking about your whoring yourself out, what do you have to say for yourself? Porsha says she is seeing someone but not a sugar daddy. Then she says she has not met the person she is seeing yet. But he is her next
client um boyfriend. ANDY ACTUALLY FOLLOWS UP! IT’S A CHRISTMAS MIRACLE! He asks about her “African Big Poppa.” Porsha can’t even keep her eyes open when she lies. There is no “big poppa” there is no sugar daddy anywhere. (well not any more.) She says if there is an African prince who would like to come sweep her off her feet that would be nice.
Andy points out that at the dinner from hell, everyone was trying to mend fences but she made no effort to apologize to Kenya. (who is this Andrew who asks all the right questions?) Porsha said that this was the first time she had seen Kenya and she really didn’t know how to approach it but as the season goes on they let their friends come in and…. she stops herself. NOT CLAUDIA. I didn’t know her or trust her! (Oh the jealousy is real.) She says that later on Nene tries to mediate the situation. Oh I am sure THAT will go well. Porsha launches into her dealing with “a bully” and moving past it and becoming a better person speech. Do you think it physically hurts to be as stupid as Porsha? I guess not. The dumbest people always seem to be the happiest. Ignorance really is bliss, I suppose.
Sidenote: Porsha keeps saying how unbothered she is because she is so busy. She mentions her new lingerie line in passing and Andy doesn’t take the bait. Word on the curb is that David Tutera did her “lingerie launch” just the night before last in Atlanta and no one showed up and Porsha was characteristically, extremely late. The only Bravo people who were there were those folks from Married to Medicine (is that still a show?). One of them is apparently a “designer” now too and Porsha wore something she made. It was a mullet style dress slutty in the front and long in the back, and appeared to have been made from hefty bags. It would not surprise me if this episode never makes it to air. You heard that here first. It was VERY disappointing from a production standpoint. The only people who showed up were people who were looking for their own publicity. I heard the entire thing was extremely unorganized, and the word “ghetto” was used by more than one attendee. And those were people Porsha invited. #TEA
Why did you refuse to apologize to Cynthia for being an hour late to their lunch? Porsha says she did but Cynthia was just so ready to pounce on her so she couldn’t win. Andy said that she seemed very cavalier (um Andy, you need to dumb it down for Porsha) about being late. Porsha said she had too because she was trying to take her down. Laverne says,”Why were you an hour late?” I’m starting to love Laverne! Porsha says she lives in Duluth (where Nene lives, it’s the sticks full of cheap McMansions) and that she had to tape extra for Dish Nation that day so she was just running late. She was going to text her but she thought, “just let me hurry up and get there.” This is all a lie. And even if it were true, which it is not, the very first words out of her mouth should have been, “I AM SO SORRY I AM LATE.” By the way the fact that she lives in Duluth has nothing to do with “taping extra for Dish Nation” If she were taping Dish Nation she would be camera ready and ALREADY DOWN TOWN.
The show a sneak peek of Apollo showing up at the Bar One opening in Charlotte (I think). Apollo says he comes in peace but he can change modes real quick. He wants to talk to her. She says they can talk at home, but he just changes clothes and goes out to the club. (true). He bear hugs here and tells her he loves her even if she doesn’t love him.
Porsha says that is sad. Laverne clutches her pearls she is not wearing. OMG! As soon as I unpaused Laverne just said, “I am clutching my pearls that are not there!” We’re twinsies me and Laverne. Actually, I think Laverne has a real twin already. 🙁
When was the last time you spoke to Kordell? She hasn’t seen him at all which means that the scenes next week are not from the Charlotte Bar One… Must be something that happened in Atlanta. She didn’t see him when she signed the papers and never saw him during or after the divorce.
Do you feel bad about how you treated Kenya? She says at what point, the fight? There was no fight honey, there was an assault where your victim chose not to engage and beat you bloody on national television. The caller says …well that and the fact that everyone treated her like shit because of lies Apollo told. Porsha says Oh, you mean like apologizing to her (Andy says, yeah…) She says oh well this is my thing. I never attack anyone unless they have attacked me. She says the situation that happened at the reunion? Absolutely, I regret “that happened” and “I acknowledge it.” “As for the situation of me calling her a whore, I call it kind of as I see it.” Andy has a reaction of “woah..” The audience had a reaction as well. Andy stops and says did he cut her off? She says she wanted keep it sweet. She says she is in a good place now and hopes Kenya is too.
The game is Wig, Weave or Weal. First up was Kenya. Porsha says WEAVE! Laverne says Weal. Porsha tries to argue with both Andy and Laverne and Laverne points out you yanked it and dragged her across the floor and nary a weave was in your hand.
The Mazel was for Vicki Gunvalson’s tweet showing her Bravo present of some headphones that showed her nekkid boobs. AND THE SHOWED THE DELETED PHOTO! #Shade