It’s time for WWHL Live with Tom Sandoval and his lovely beard, Ariana Madix! FYI, in case you missed Tom’s previous appearances on WWHL, Andy has a major hard-on for Sandoval. Tom is in some sort of skinny legged shiny green patterned suit. Andy begins by ribbing Tom for wearing Ariana’s full duster length sweater on the show. Ariana admits that he wears her clothes. Andy also comments on the tight green suit.
Andy begins by showing a remix of Tom’s weepy video and the fight. I was hoping for a full version of the video. Andy asks if he regrets making the video. Tom says yes, he feels like David Hasselhoff. He was upset because so much happened including Shay’s Dad getting pushed into the fight.
Andy plays a montage of my people hating on my girl Kristen. They be some jealous haters up on that show. Then an even better clip called How to Get Dumped While You’re Breaking Up With Someone. The title alone cracks me up.
Questions:
What don’t Tom and Ariana hire a maid or at least by a Dirt Devil with all their SUR cash. Their apartment is filthy! Ariana says that is not her apartment it is Tom’s. Tom blames a mess off camera roommate.
Once a cheater always a cheater. (Yes I know that was not a question.) Tom gets exasperated (guilty) lets out a sigh (guilty) begins with “First of all” (guilty) another heavy sigh (guilty) and closes his eyes, (guilty) says I mean, (guilty) stutters (guilty) Andy frown at him with his mouth open… everyone is snickering. Tom laughs nervously. I mean, STUPID ANDREW PUTS WORDS IN HIS MOUTH by saying, “You’re not going to cheat on her” He says No! Of Course Not! (guilty) First of all….Andy says, “You cheated on Kristen!” and Ariana say “Oh whoo? shrug.” Andrew laughs. Tom says Let me tell you something four times (guilty) I kissed Ariana. She fucked Jax. She had affairs with multiple people at SUR, which is common knowledge. Andy says to Tom that he looks like an animé character. He says thanks. Tom is a cheating cheater who cheaters with other women but his boyfriend is probably okay with it. Ariana and Tom kiss.
Why are you friends with Jax again? Tom says for a while they were not around each other. But then they had to work together and he forgave him because it was just easier to work with him. Andy doesn’t think Jax has feelings. Tom says he has known Jax forever and he’s not a bad guy.
Ariana are you really not made at Scheana for being friends with Kristen? Ariana isn’t. Scheana can be friends with whoever she wants. He says Scheana is very loyal to her and she knows she will make good decisions and figure things out. (ie dump Kristen)
When is Tom going to put a ring on that? Tom stutters around. Andy asks them how old they are. Tom is 32 and Ariana is 29. Andy gives them a look. This is a showmance. These two will never get married.
Ariana, is it awkward having to work with Kristen? She says when she is at work she just puts her head down and does her job.
Tom, how many drinks does it take to do an epic four minute apology video? Tom says he had had an adrenaline rush and he had had four or five drinks. LIAR. (and cheater) I’d say closer to 14 drinks than 4.
Mike Shay tweeted, “I don’t care what anyone says, Tom Sandoval’s apology really meant a lot, thanks brother. ”
That stupid Canadian wanna be southern chef from Top Chef tweeted in “Looks like a snakeskin and no panties kind of night.” Because, douche.
Do you other things besides work at SUR? Ariana says she has always been an actor. She did an episode of Anger Management last week, and honey this Vanderpump Rules gig is like 24/7. (she didn’t really say that last part, but we know…) Tom shot two pilots while Vanderpump Rules was filming.
The game is Relationshit Happens. He played the game with Kristen last time. They won concealer. And Andy’s book. I kind of want Andy’s book. That is wrong isn’t it?
Why did it take so long to breakup with Kristen? Tom rambles on about believing everyone is good deep down. He implies there are lots of things that he can’t say because of production/editing.
Poll Question: Do you believe Tom cheated on Ariana in Miami? Yes 67%
It feels so uncomfortable to hear Tom ramble on and Andy cut him off or finish his sentence after he’s asked a question. Couple that with his and Arianna’s jokes (that didn’t go over well with the audience…crickets ). It was weird and awkward watching them get interviewed.
The interview was … different. Tom is … different, and I sense that if push came to shove, Ariana would assume the dominant male role as Tom would fuss with concealer, and then his hair product to style dozens of pointy peaks … different, too. All considered,?? 9
don’t think
Uhm…so yeah, was Tom on something? It was VERY awkward (not to mention painful and embarrassing) watching Tom trying to answer the simplest of questions. Ariana seems like a fairly intelligent and cool chick, can’t for the life of me figure out WHY she’s with him?!
Kristen tweeted they were both drunk or high or something. Andy read it on the air. Ariana’s acting skills were lacking as she pretended to be insulted at the accusation. 🙂
On Tue, Nov 11, 2014 at 11:15 AM, Tamara Tattles wrote:
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does anyone know if andy’s line “..if your’e a shower not a grower” was directed at somebody specifically? was it an inside poke (heh heh) at tom or something?
First of all he said it wrong. The expression is I’m a grower not a shower. I’m pretty sure the guys on Vanderpump Rules have had a biggest penis contest or two at least in conversation…
On Tue, Nov 11, 2014 at 1:38 PM, Tamara Tattles wrote:
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Kristen posted late last night to a response on the omg they are hammered tweet, someone said something about them not being coherent and what was with all the touching kissing etc, she responded with her name is molly. That is some kind of drug but looked this morning and it was gone. Btw, I watch most of the shows you recap and always still come read what you have to say because, always spot on and hilarious AND you see things I miss thank you for doing this!
Thanks for reading Alice! And for letting us know it was “molly”
On Tue, Nov 11, 2014 at 3:11 PM, Tamara Tattles wrote:
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heh heh 🙂 thanks for responding Tamara!!
I almost hesitate to raise this but we are in a new world now. I think the “beard” references are a bit outdated. I think there are more bisexual people out there than we as a society may want to believe. There are a lot of folks who could play for both teams, but choose to batter up for one. That does not make their partner at any particular point in time a “beard”. And no, TT, I am not speaking from personal experience! 🙂
At the end of the day, Tom is gay.
(Consider this comment my audition for a bravolebrity role…. i think i nailed it)
ha!
There are likely not as many beards around in your hipster town, but trust me, in the rest of the country there are plenty still around. And stop hitting on me.
On Tue, Nov 11, 2014 at 9:34 PM, Tamara Tattles wrote:
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Thanks for recapping this, btw. I visit your site religiously and have been looking forward to pump rules posts. I know you’re souper busy so thanks a lot!
YAY Jelley is back! Love your nic and have missed seeing it! 🙂
Other than his appearance, where are we getting that Tom is gay?
Um…. really?
I still love and adore this show because…trainwreck. No excuses. “Douchebumps”. That is all.
I have to say it. adrenia has this glazed look on her face and i know katie and ardrena are in total denial. Makes women look stupid for what we put up with when the guy is good looking.