Warning: This is blog is spoiler-ish, but not enough to spoil your freaky fun.
Get ready freaktards because we are about to be thrilled & scared shitless again for another 90 minute episode tonight titled “Matinees and Massacres.” There are still many more freaks that we have to meet, and tonight we will be introduced to Dell Toledo (Michael Chiklis) & Desire Dupree (Angela Bassett), his gorgeous three breasted bride with something extra going on DOWN THERE. Dell must be a real freak between the sheets because he used to get it on with the bearded lady, his ex-wife, and now he’s into chicks with dicks. #Greedy
Dell & Desire are on the run and intend to make The Freak Show their new home. Expect clashes between Dell & his baby momma Ethel, as well as Elsa when she learns of his plans to start showing matinees. Things take a turn for the worse when Dell discovers his son Jimmy Darling at the diner. Last week Jimmy patronized the local diner for meatloaf and pussy with his gloved hands, but tonight he flirts with the waitress bare handed. Let’s just say that the waitress is grossed out by his hands & doesn’t care about his finger banging skills. #StrictlyDickly
Last year’s Coven co-starred Patti LuPone. This year we are fortunate to have another Patti as in LaBelle for 4 episodes. YASSS freaktards the “Lady Marmalade” Grammy winning legend herself is going to gitcha gitcha ya ya da da with us all. Sorry she won’t be singing, but she is the maid at Dandy & Gloria Mott’s mansion and she begins to unravel Twisty’s secrets. She is also the mother of Gabourey Sidibe’s character that we won’t see until later in the season. The Mott mansion is over the top fancy, but after watching the promo I can sorta recognize what looks like last year’s Coven mansion all dressed up.
I will warn you that like last year’s incestuous mother/son storyline Murphy will show us another unhealthy mother/son relationship between Dandy & Gloria. After a weirdly dark conversation with his mother Dandy runs away from home with dreams of joining the Freak Show. While Gloria searches for her son, she finds Twisty the Clown literally on the side of the road and brings his ass home to cheer Dandy up and be his new companion. The association between a homicidal maniac and a rich spoiled kid with some inner freak in him is a recipe for nothing good. You guys are gonna FREAK out as the season progresses with these two as #BosomBuddies
So far we have seen Elsa’s love & affection for her freaks, and we learned of her motives to creep into their spotlight. Tonight she becomes dangerously jealous at the talent exhibited by one of her freaks. Nobody steals the spotlight away from Elsa Mars. Oh this reminds me that I have to clarify something in my recap for Episode-1. I was wrong when I described Elsa’s look for her performance of “Life on Mars” as Marlene Dietrich inspired with too much old lady crazy blue shadow. Instead her look was copied directly from David Bowie’s video for the song which I have never seen. I’m obsessed with that video now and watch it at least once a day.
What is scarier Twisty’s clown mask or what’s underneath it? Well Ryan Murphy has been teasing fans by warning us that tonight we will see what is under Twisty’s mask, and it ain’t purrrty. #Nip/Tuck. Episode-2 airs tonight on FX at 10 ET. I will have a recap ready by Friday since I have 50% more freaky shit to write about for another 90 minute episode.
On a personal note I’m beyond thrilled that actress Naomi Grossman who plays Pepper tweeted me after she read my recap last week. Plus I had a mini panic attack when I realized I was one degree away from Jessica Lange and regretted that I kinda sorta dissed Lange’s accent. LUV YA JESSICA #BowDownBitches. I hope all of you will stalk me on twitter too @Urethra_F
The bearded lady also has a little something extra, down there…it’s been released that she is a hermaphrodite. Gottalove #chikswithdicks
Thought that was the Angela Bassett character…
The key word in my post is “ALSO”. They are BOTH hermaphrodites, why do you think the strongman (Michael Chitless sp?) was in a relationship with them both?…
Sent from my Windows Phone ________________________________
Though I hadn’t read that myself Jacques, I will take you on your word because it makes sense in the story because macho Strongman Dell Toledo is a superfreak between the sheets.
UF, you are the reigning champ of recaps/precaps its a wonder Jessica herself tweeted you, bit the season is early so crossing fingers for you, i would love to hear your response to us when she does though. t-minus less than an hour away let the show begin
meant to say Jessica herself HASNT tweeted you yet…wishful thinking earlier i guess
Thanks Steve but that would never happen… but if it did there would be NO response because people who die from heart attacks can’t use the internet.
Even I would pee my pants if Jessica reached out. Love her!
Thanks for this extra post before the episode even begins. A little something more for us Freaktards. We are ever so humble and grateful. Thank you…thank you…thank you. Looking forward to the next post. And the next. And the one after that. Xoxoxo.
Glad you appreciate.
I hate spoiling, but I need to write something so you guys can have an immediate place to come and talk about the show since my recaps take forever to write. Plus I learn about things that I miss from all of you. I need all you freaktards too.
I’m staying up to watch, and anticipating fucked up dreams tonight. 🙂
Twisty’s face is NOT cute.
Those teeth!
I spoke too soon, just saw that it has not been revealed yet. Oh shit…
So glad you love that video. Bowie had a mullet extraordinaire! The song has been stuck in my head since last week.
I wish I had remembered to included a link for that Bowie video in this post.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v–IqqusnNQ
On Wed, Oct 15, 2014 at 10:24 PM, Tamara Tattles wrote:
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Is this mansion actually in New Orleans? For some reason I think that and that the producers live there. Maybe I am just associating it with the voodoo connection of last season.
Just like Coven, FreakShow the entirely filmed in New Orleans. I am pretty sure that any interior shots of the mansion is a set built inside.
i was under the impression that the show is filmed in Georgia..
UF, have been in lots of pain this past week from my CRPS. Than goodness it has eased up just in time for AHS and your precap. I had the feeling from the first time I saw Dandy that he and Twisty were going to become good friends. Dandy is just as twisted as Twisty. He just has a mommy who dresses hum nicer lol. And you’re right, neither face is good. Looking forward to the rest and being able to participate this week.
Hannah I definitely noticed your absence from our premiere discussion. Hope you feel better soon. xoxo UF
No, not Meeps!!!!
I know – so sad.
watching tonight i had to wonder, there are lots of rides around the freakshow, where are all the “normal” carny’s?
OMG I Love this season…I too was afraid of the clown idea and CGI “freaks” but they handle the clown properly and I absolutely love that they use real actors! Brilliant! Only on episode two but have really high hopes so far. Wasn’t a big fan of Coven, liked the first and really liked Asylum. With the Easter eggs, caught a moment of dialog that mentioned the Garden of Eden…possible season 5?
How the fuck do they handle the clown properly??? Is there a way to handle a clown properly? THAT clown has not been handled properly!!!
This is episode was FREAKING FANTASTIC. Everything just flowed, and wasn’t all over the place.
UF you are correct, I felt like Coven was kinda crazy with the story line and I feel that this season seems a bit more cohesive, guess that’s why I’m loving it!
What did you do when you saw Clowns face? I was like oh hell!
I so agree. Ryan Murphy told us it would be even better than Coven….and he didn’t disappoint.
2nd episode in and it is fabulous, funny, dark, twisted and unfortunately. ..sad. My God it is GOOD!
Poor little Meeps. Not ready to start loosing my freaks yet when we’ve just begun to meet them. That calling the cops thing sure backfired on Jimmy’s ass. His momma told him to leave Dell alone.
Sooo…does anyone else wonder/hope/pray that perhaps the Bowie references will turn into a Bowie appearance like Stevie Nicks on Coven?
From your mouth to Bowie’s ears, but he couldn’t play himself.
Awesome can’t wait for the re-cap so happy to see Patty LaBelle
Just finished watching it. That clown scares the dog shit outta me! Can’t wait for your recap UF! The whole cast should be reading you and TT!
Second episode a bit disappointing to me. Probably because I was so over the moon about the first one, nothing else could be as perfect. Anxiously await the Urethra recap that brings even more entertainment and fills in blanks. I do not know what song Bette sang. I enjoyed it, may be popular, but I often cannot catch the words to a lot of music. The melody was unfamiliar to me as well.
Angel, the song was Criminal by Fiona Apple.
Awesome performance from Sarah.
Last night was the 1st time I have EVER watched AHS. My kid finally wore me down… And even though I am a little freaked out, I am totally hooked.
Was completely shocked with Angela Bassetts character!
Will you be Recapping “Below Deck.” I just love your pithy reviews!!!
Yeah. I am a couple episodes behind. Hoping to catch up today and tomorrow if all the Felons by Bravo can stay out of the news. 🙂
On Thu, Oct 16, 2014 at 11:52 AM, Tamara Tattles wrote:
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I just realized this is the AHS post comments. Please stay on the topic of AHS. Sorry UF didn’t realize where this post was.
On Thu, Oct 16, 2014 at 11:52 AM, Tamara Tattles wrote:
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I’ve been reading TT for a while but I never knew there was a Horror Story sect and I’M SO STOKED.
I LOVED Asylum – it was the first Horror Story I watched and I honestly think it’s one of the best shows I’ve ever seen. I then watched the first season which I still liked but it didnt get REALLY good until halfway through (I will forever call Sistah Jude as Sistah Jude).
Haven’t seen Coven but I’m really looking forward to it.
So far I’m liking the new season even though I’m having a hard time hearing Sistah Elsa’s dialogue. Does anyone know if Sister Mary Anus (sorry, my boyfriend and I called her this so often I honestly don’t know her real name) will be making an appearance in this season?
I love how the clowns character will be explored beyond cameo-murders – I’m a horrible person but I’m happy that Meep is the first one to go.
Does anyone know if a Siamese twin can live without its other half? I’m having tragic visions of one of the sisters being decapitated and the other having to live alone.
Welcome Psylocke.
No unfortunately the talented Ms. Lilly Rabe (Sister Mary) won’t be on AHS this season. Her deviled possessed nun character in Asylum scared the BAJEEZZUS out of me…
Glad you found us freaktards here.
Wow! This episode was nothing short of amazing. I loved every minute of it. There is not one weak character. I’m strangely intrigued by the clown. I have a feeling they will further explain how he became how he is. He seemed to genuinely want to entertain the kid he kidnapped with the robot toy.
I actually stopped recording How To Get Away with Murder just to watch this OnDemand. I hate how Networks purposefully put the best shows on Thursdays and Sundays to compete. Not fair for fans.
Does anyone have any info on why Gab Sid isn’t on this season or the other girls that were on all of the other seasons? Budget cut to cast Patti Labelle and Mike Chicliss (sp?)??
Gaborey will appear later in the season. Sometime around episode 4 or 5
Thanks, Urethra! This made my day.
I finally watched the episode on demand last night. I seriously keep checking back here every hour in anticipation of your review! I need to see people’s thoughts & I love my TT crowd! I tried to look up a review on other blogs and nothing is as insightful, witty or thorough as yours, Urethra.
I appreciate that Kay. Sorry I couldn’t come through this week. Read my message below.
Hello everyone.
I am very very very &very sorry, but I am not able to do my regular recap this week. Life got in the way, and no time.
I’m not making promises, but I’m might do something with less narrative with just random thoughts & observations. After all you already watched the show and know what happened.
Again terribly sorry.
In the opening scene Meep the Geek was polishing eggs clean. WHY? He eats the heads of live chickens. So weird.
The actor who plays Meep the Geek also played Infantata in the first season of AHS. He was that freaky baby that lived in the basement and killed people of the Murder House.
Elsa’s tent is grander than the faded soiled single tents of her beloved ‘monsters’; especially with her over the top baroque candelabras, chandeliers, & tchotchkes. Don’t you all think the inside kinda looks like the inside of the bottle where “I Dream Of Jeannie “ lives with all the heavy draping and textiles. It’s very claustrophobic. I remind myself it’s fucking tent.
LOL when Bette was nervously chewing on her finger then Dot reached over and tugged it away from her mouth.
Freaks declare how they are just normal people as they dig up body parts.
Twisty in that toy store playing statue between two other clown mannequins scared the shit out of me.
Dandy drinks cognac out of an engraved silver & crystal baby bottle with nipple.
Dandy’s 2 spiraled curled bangs remind of Devil horns.
The Mott mansion is the same set as the Coven mansion only dressed up with tapestry and paint.
I learned a new world from Gloria, “opprobrium”.
Dandy must be gay if Gloria is tempting him to play with June Allyson paper dolls.
Loved it when Dell called Ethel Honest Abe. She does look Lincolnesque.
I just got a kick at seeing that gay guy on top of Desiree. “You want me to use my extra bit of business”. LOL
I never heard of ‘poof’ before which is a derogatory slang word for gay man.
So AHS has the strongman, a macho man character that fucks bearded women & hermaphrodites. I bet ya my ding a ling his character is gonna be a bisexual freak. I think it is safe to say that Ethel was literally his beard.
Twisty must smell funky and rank. How does someone as refined as Gloria not smell him when she picked him up.
How old is manboy Dandy? He drinks and drives. She asked Twisty if he does children’s parties.
So the outward freaks are normal on the inside, and the normal outside people are freaks on the inside.
What hell was on that platter on Gloria’s dining room table? A whole fish with head that was spiral wrapped with cucumber strips, a bow. And what is that bright red garnishment in place of the fish’s eyes? Looks like holly bush berries.
Dandy the has a menagerie of stuffed animals, drives a car, and drinks cognac out a crystal silver baby bottle.
I love love love the color of the muted pale barely visible chartreuse paint in Dandy’s play room.
Watching Angela Bassett thrust her hips while saying “pop pop pop” about ping pong balls shooting out of lady bits.
I can’t stop looking at the color of Elsa’s awkwardly drawn in eyebrows. I hate weird eyebrows, they freak me out.
The look on Elsa’s face when she heard Dot sing “Dream a little dream of me” scared me. In this scene I could clearly see her real eyebrows covered in foundation as well as her drawn in ones.
I knew a head was in that bag of tricks that twisty carries around. It is very bloody at the bottom.
Isn’t the civil rights allegory played out after last season’s Coven?
Pepper has the largest man sized hands I have ever seen.
Watching Dandy carry Bonnie and shove her back into Twisty’s lair that she just escaped from gave me the shivers.
Elsa’s German accent was completely decipherable this episode.
Why do I feel that Jessica Lange & Francis Conroy are playing different versions of Fiona Goode & Myrtle Snow from Coven?
Why was this promoted as another 90 minute episode? My DVR says its 83 minutes, but really the show was over at 75 minutes. That is a lot of commercials. Get those money stacks Ryan Murphy.
I didn’t notice Twisty behind the clerk’s head until my husband pointed out. Rewinded…freaky! Dandy’s horns made me think of Richie Rich. 🙂 And I think that the head in the bag was the clerk’s from the first scene. Love your recaps, UF!
I moved UF’s observations to their own new post.
http://s17948.p858.sites.pressdns.com/2014/10/18/urethra-franklins-brilliant-observations-of-american-horror-story-episode-2/
Because they are awesome.
On Sat, Oct 18, 2014 at 10:59 AM, Tamara Tattles wrote:
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I agree with Kay. I tried to read another recap (I’m SORRY! I was jonesing! I needed a fix!)— it only left me feeling frustrated and very very dirty.
Ureathra;
Thank you for this. I hope your real life is great and everything’s OK.
I love your recaps so much, but take care of yourself.
~~Total TT blog junkie.~~
Granted, I don’t have any experience with these things but I think there’s something… peculiar about that woman’s boobs.
j/k
There you are! I was worried you didn’t survive your birthday celebration! 🙂
On Sun, Oct 19, 2014 at 1:40 PM, Tamara Tattles wrote:
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Was the toy store clerk a cameo by Chris Colfer? And have I seen Darren Criss as well?
Neither one has appeared as far I know. Darren Criss is fine as hell by the way so I would know if I saw him. But the toy store clerk definitely was not Colfer.