This looks like it will be epic! This is the first time they have ever done a reunion show and there are people there from all seasons. The returning couples are Catelynn Lowell and Tyler Baltierra, Doug Hutchison and Courtney Stodden, Joel “JoJo” and Tashaunda “Tiny Haile, Shayne & Nik Lamas-Richie and Farrah Abraham.
We start with Nik and Shayne. Shayne says looking back on their reel makes her realize how stupid all of their problems were at the time. They left the house closer than ever and then tragedy happened. They got pregnant and were so happy. Then one day Shayne collapsed out of the blue. Her eyes rolled back in her head. She had internal bleeding and needed surgery. It turned out that they had to induce a coma and remove the baby in an attempt to save Shayne. Nik was told there was a high chance that she might be in a vegetative state. Nik held the dead fetus in his for two hours and talked to him. Shayne says she is just hearing this for the first time. This is an odd story. I’m just saying. Shayne says that she fell in love with him all over again during the experience. Shayne had a full hysterectomy and can’t have more kids. The dead baby was due the day they filmed the reunion show. This experience finally has their priorities in order. Shayne kept her ovaries in the hysterectomy and the will be having another baby.
Next up is JoJo and Tiny. I don’t remember a lot about this couple. I can’t remember who was on their episode, but they got overshadowed by someone. JoJo needs alcohol rehab not couples rehab. Tiny cries after their reel. JoJo is still drinking. Doug asks JoJo if he is drunk tonight. He says he is not. Doug says since JoJo is wearing sunglasses and slurring his words, he thought he would ask him. JoJo is threatening to whip Doug’s ass. JoJo is going in on Doug for screwing a 16-year-old. Dr. Jenn tells JoJo he is being very aggressive. Tiny says she is just going to do her. Tiny goes to Al-Anon meetings and finds them helpful.
Dr. Jenn says no other couple has gotten the extreme, visceral reaction for other people in the house and the public in general than Courtney and Doug. Oh! JoJo and Tiny were on with Courtney and Doug and Shayne and Nik and Simon and Alex! They never stood a chance to get any attention or screen time. They got kicked out of the house their season because Courtney would not follow the dress code.
Dr. Jenn asks Courtney and Doug the actual status of their relationship. Courtney says she was no Celebrity Big Brother in the UK and when she got put into that house she totally wanted to be single. I just did a quick check and Courtney stayed for 21 out of the 23 days the game lasted. Courtney cheated on Doug in the Big Brother UK house on live feeds it seems. When she came out of the house she dated and ran around on Doug for 9 months. I guess she needed to get her jollies out.
Shayne is jumping in to comment and is somewhat incredulous but doesn’t seem unkind in her comments. Doug points out that they were respectful in listening to her story. Then drunk (ALLEGEDLY) JoJo chimes in calling Doug a pervert and says “Don’t no one want to hear that shit.” Farrah, who hasn’t piped up at all and who is getting sick of waiting for her time to shine tells Doug she would love to hear his story.” You know, I can totally see Farrah going for Doug if Courtney leaves him. They would be a good match. I don’t even mean that in a shady way. Farrah and Courtney are a lot alike. Farrah demands everyone respect the situation. Did I just use Farrah and respect in the same sentence?
OMG This is a two parter! Next Wednesday before “my episode” of Couples Therapy looks even better. I had forgotten how much I love this show!
Doug says it was a difficult time because he had to watch it on TV. Doug says that the gift out it was that he was able to suggest that the have a separation so that she could go do what she needed to do. Nik says, ” So wait, Doug broke up with you????” JoJo says, “That’s bullshit.” The audience laughs. Courtney says, “He actually…” And then an explosion of reality TV drama explodes. Nik and JoJo mock Doug. Shayne says she tried to warn Courtney that she had wild oats to sow. Farrah keeps jumping in somehow making this about he having a child. Catelynn and Tyler laugh in Farrah’s face. This is the best thing I have seen on TV in MONTHS. I am mesmerized. I will be watching next Wednesday in real-time even if there is a live show where Apollo gets carted off to prison airing on Bravo at the same dayum time. And by the way, coincidentally he must turn himself in next Wednesday so it could happen! But this… this is some good TV. Nik just says, “I just want to know if he broke up with her because she turned 18.” And a much-needed commercial break is taken.
Doug and Courtney try once again to give their update. Courtney says she went through so much in the last year and a half. She is fake crying. She says that hurting him was horrible. Doug says everyone goes through hard times. Courtney says she realizes what a beautiful man she has. Courtney says at the end of the day, (I know but this is actually proper usage) you go home to your spouse, not any of you on the couches or any of you in the audience. She says she now knows that she goes home to a beautiful man, and she has had someone to compare it to now. Catelynn asks if she sees herself with him for the rest of her like. Courtney jokes, “HIS life.” Doug laughs.
Farah says that she thinks it looks pretty bad when a house full of adults gang up on a 16 year old in the Couples Therapy house. JoJo says, “Who the fuck is she?” Farah responds with ” Who the fuck are you? If you want to be rude…” Farah tells Tiny to shut the fuck up. Now Tiny is Set AWWFF! She threatens to snatch her “wig” (newsflash, Tiny, it’s not a wig, it’s called hair) and says them pieces will get pulled out boo (okay there may be some pieces in there) you got me fucked up! Jenn finally stops it and that is when JoJo let’s out “That right there is why she is sitting in a seat by her damn self!” Oh drunk JoJo you do know how to burn Farrah. Farrah says, “That’s right because I’m such a stupid bitch no one showed up.” Then she starts crying. REAL tears for a change because that was a serious blow. Tiny says, “Here the bitch go crying.” Farrah says something about “you put it all over the stage.” Tiny says “You want it to be all over the stage? Say one more thing and you’ll be drug all over this motherfucker!” JoJo is getting up! Someone shouts JoJo no! Cut to Farrah crying.
Next week: Will Doug and Courtney every get to tell their story? Will Catelynn and Tyler? And Catelynn tells Farrah, “We know you don’t need money, you sold your VAGINA!”
OMG that was fantastic. I promise this blog does not do justice to what I just witnessed. YOU MUST WATCH.