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You are here: Home / Entertainment News / Million Dollar Listing Miami Recap: Co-Listing HELL!

Million Dollar Listing Miami Recap: Co-Listing HELL!

July 2, 2014 by tamaratattles 21 Comments

Million Dollar Listing Miami Cast

I know I am watching this by myself and I hate you all for that. I gave Botched! two episodes today. You guys should respond in kind. What the fuck are you watching in this timeslot anyway?

Sam

The way over priced Trump Royale penthouse she has thirty days to sell is going to be her demise. And for some reason she is sitting at card table on a street corner using it as an office. I guess it is an outdoor café, but it looks fake. You know, like all of Miami.

Sam meets with Chris to get advice about the listing. Chris says to meet with the co-lister and say she needs to get the owner to reduce, or withdraw from the listing. Sam really wants to impress the owner so she is hesitant.  Sam has $25K of her money in the listing. Sam meets with Rachel the co-lister to tell her she needs a reduction. BTW, neither agent believes in Botox. In Miami. But they disagree about withdrawing. The meeting with the client is full of tension because the two listers disagree. Sam withdrew from the listing. He took it away from both of them. He friend now hates her.  The new agents lowered it to $8.5 million. It’s still on the market….

Million Dollar Listing MiamiChad

Likewise, Chad has a terrible co-listing with a part-time agent and homeowner. If he is such a hot shot, why did he agree to that horrific situation? After she cancelled the open house at the last-minute last week, he should have just thrown in the towel.

It’s time to do the open house again. It’s party replete with dancers. The focus is on party house.  The house is listed for $3.995 million. It’s the cheapest house on the island so it should be an easy sell. Sam arrives to the party, and returns the favor he started last week by disrespecting his open house as cliché with the whole sex sells approach.  Then he takes everyone to da club to party. The homeowner owns the club.

Chad gets an offer of $3,295 on the listing. The buying agent says the house is basically a teardown. He goes up to $3.4 million.  Chad seems to be refusing to present which, at least where I live is illegal. All offers must be presented. The guy returns with $3.55 million. Chad finally presents the offer after no presenting the first two. Such a dumb move even if it were legal. The husband balks and says find some way to make me interested in the offer. The wife convinces him to take it. Chad has his first close of the season. I think the took too little of an offer.

Million Dollar Listing MiamiChris

The only realtor that has had a closing so far it Chris.  It took me most of an episode to like him, but now I do. He’s gay and he’s fabulous and what more could I ask for. He is at a polo match seducing his new client, Senada. Wait, she is not the owner, she’s the prospective listing agent. He wants to co-list with her. He gets the listing. Because, he already had it and they thought the polo thing would be pretty. It was.

The listing is… perfectly situated, but very European hotel. It doesn’t speak to me as a place to live, but just a 6,000 square foot hotel room with sharp edges everywhere that I would not want to get drunk and fall down on.  It’s WAY too modern for my taste. No thanks, I’ll pass on this one, despite it being the most expensive place in Boca Raton. Chris wants to like it for $20 million, the other agent says $13.5.  It is listed for $13.95 million.  Chris’s hands are tied because he is the secondary agent. He feels the property is grossly underpriced.

Chris wants a very classy, elegant open house with a harpist and white glove champagne service. His co-agent says she thinks the buyer will be male (she is right about that) so she wants a bikini contest. Um, really? While I agree that this is a masculine apartment, a bikini competition would exclude all the rich gay males. Miami is full of rich gay males. WTF is she thinking about? Plus, Chris is bringing in European and NYC clients. I am not buying that this woman is serious.

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Filed Under: Entertainment News Tagged With: Bravo, Chad, Chad Carroll, Christopher Leavitt, Douglas Elliman, Miami, Million Dollar Listing Miami, Samantha DeBianchi

About tamaratattles

Come for the tea. Stay for the shade. Not for the easily offended. You're a special snowflake just like everyone else.

Comments

  1. Zazu says

    July 2, 2014 at 10:16 pm

    Okay, so I actually like Botched. I think you have to watch it with an eye toward the humorous. I can’t say I’ll keep going with it, but it is interesting to see the fixes on some of these people.

    Reply
  2. Valerie says

    July 2, 2014 at 10:20 pm

    The Weather Channel, CSpan, and NatGeoWild. Anything but this. I miss Fredrik.

    Reply
  3. Banana Bug says

    July 2, 2014 at 10:21 pm

    Why can’t Miami float a show? There is nothing, no one interesting in this!

    Reply
    • Favo says

      July 7, 2014 at 4:13 pm

      Can’t stand this show. I especially don’t like the female realtor…she is not attractive at all.

      Reply
  4. Kishmish says

    July 2, 2014 at 10:42 pm

    No! No you aren’t alone! I watched this too. Wasn’t it about those two lesbians getting a divorce? They had to split the dogs. Sad man.

    Reply
  5. calipatti says

    July 3, 2014 at 12:15 am

    TT, I did watch but the other comments in here are really funny.
    Sorry!!

    Reply
    • Valerie says

      July 3, 2014 at 12:50 am

      Hey Calipatti, I was being serious about NatGeoWild! Am I the only one still watching The Dog Whisperer? I think so.

      Seriously though, I am watching Miami as we speak. I really want to see the bikini party that will be judged by Chris. He’s the show IMO.

      The New York and L.A. real estate win over Miami real estate so that part sucks.

      Reply
      • Karma Grant says

        July 3, 2014 at 2:02 pm

        I have to disagree. I think NY and Miami real estate is better than LA.

        Reply
      • Valerie says

        July 3, 2014 at 3:23 pm

        Even Malibu?

        Reply
      • Karma Grant says

        July 15, 2014 at 5:48 pm

        Ok you got me there. Malibu real estate is pretty fricken awesome 😀

        Reply
  6. carolina says

    July 3, 2014 at 11:22 am

    Thanks for the recap TT. I absolutely love this show, my favorite character is Chris, how could I not love a fabulous gay man 🙂

    Reply
  7. Karma Grant says

    July 3, 2014 at 2:01 pm

    I watch this, just finished it a little bit ago. I think Sam should have done what she did earlier in the listing. At the very beginning even. I also thought the co-lister had never sold anything previously so it’s no surprise she was begging to stay on the listing at the too high price.

    I love Chris. “Another one for Chrissy!” cracked me up.

    I also thought Chad’s listing sold for too low. I’m no realtor but even Chad said the land alone was worth what the house/land sold for. I think rich gf/co-lister just wanted to be done with it. Her rich bf/husband?! asked after they wrapped the meeting if she was ready to go on vacation.

    Reply
  8. 007Man says

    July 3, 2014 at 3:18 pm

    I hope they recast Sam’s spot. A few good choices would be Susan Rindley, Lana Bell, Senada Adzem, Katrina Campins, or Ashley Cusack.

    Reply
  9. Lashond says

    July 3, 2014 at 5:40 pm

    I watch the show and so far I like it.

    Reply
  10. 007Man says

    July 4, 2014 at 1:14 pm

    And actually it would be great to see 2 Women on the Show and 2 Men. 4 great Agents would make things very interesting.

    Reply
    • Valerie says

      July 4, 2014 at 5:33 pm

      You’ll get half your wish on the L.A. MDL. There will be four people, but no females.

      Reply
  11. Neal says

    July 9, 2014 at 6:24 pm

    Had to fast forward through this train reck, Chad is such a poser and phony. The gay guy is kind of sad and a bore, the chick is lame and couldn’t sell water in the desert.

    Reply
  12. Realllly? says

    July 10, 2014 at 1:03 am

    Ok. So fake. Bravo should vet their cast more. Sam is an absolute unknown. If she sold $25 m last year she wouldn’t be living in an old town house with on street parking for her kiddie kar Mercedes. Lol. That waddeling old lady Joan Sher with the crossed eyes she is doing the deal with… She is a fake and just undersold her seller for a little air time. She needs acting classes. The whole thing was staged. The deli they were having lunch at doesn’t even have a hostess… All staged!!! Oh and Sam… Learn how to pronounce the names of the streets in the neighborhood you work in. It is not Bon-tone-a!!! This show was career suicide for her and that other tired old lady!

    Reply
  13. Karen says

    July 12, 2014 at 1:28 pm

    This show should be called million dollar listing South Florida not just Miami and everything Sam has done has been in Ft. Lauderdale

    Reply
    • Karma Grant says

      July 15, 2014 at 5:48 pm

      It’s not that different from LA which features deals in LA, Malibu and Palm Springs.

      Reply
  14. Honestlythough says

    August 10, 2014 at 12:52 am

    million dollar listing miami is so freaking bad its unwatchable… And Im from Miami and love Miami! But the show… How to put this politely… Sucks major butt! Cancel it already I cant stand it.

    Reply

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