Oh Lord. I don’t know why I feel like I must do this. I feel like I have seen the train wreck and I might as well look. Why is Tori always in bed? She is going to narrate the whole show from her bed. UGH. She is trying to use her sexy voice, or her hosting voice, or some voice that is not her true Tori voice.
In this unseen footage therapy session, Tori basically accuses Dean of lying. Tori wants us to know they were having lots and lots of very kinky sex. She rages about it to her therapist. But she whisper yells to us that she doesn’t want to divulge their specific kinks because, “A lady never tells” but that “Donna Martin definitely graduated.” I’m going to need someone to admit to watching 90210 to explain that inside comment.
Tori is crying the ugly cry because Dean went out for a hamburger when he had filet mignon at home. They are literally discussing that quote. Next up, “sometimes a haircut is just a haircut.” Oh wait, it’s not about the haircut, it’s about Canada.
Tori just called yelling, “using her big voice.”
I am not sure I can go on.
Hey I know, let’s talk about the suicide storyline that a lot of people don’t even believe happened. Tori did not want to talk about that on TV. And yet, they did talk about it. Now, in hindsight, Tori is glad they did talk about it because it makes HER look like less of a doormat. Those were her words.
Why can’t I stop watching this.
Long scene about why the Heidi Handjob said that they cuddled all night? When and how did Tori even talk to Molly Goodhand? Why has that never been explained? Why hasn’t any tabloid on the planet been able to track her down?
Is it wrong that while Dean and Liam were in the bounce house I was wishing it was one of the ones that got airlifted into the sky?
More unseen footage where Tori says that Dean made her father’s death all about him and she was not allowed to grieve. Which is odd because when it comes to Tori, everything is about Tori.
Horrific scenes with Tori crying in front of Liam. Liam basically says he is behaving himself because clearly mommy is sick. Just awful to watch.
Tori’s entire point with this discourse is to make sure we all understand how hard this is on her. Why is everyone so concerned for Dean and the children when she is the victim??
Okay, I really tried but I can’t go on with this.
Hollywood Life reported today that Tori and Jennie Garth are reuniting in a comedy called Mystery Girls. Something about two actresses who played detectives on a TV show who hook up to solve a real life mystery. Welp, I guess that’s a paycheck…
Sorry. I’m really out now.
Donna Martin was a “good girl” on 90210. guess tori is a bad girl now.
poor liam & the kids.
re tori & dean, karma is a bitch.
Thanks Chris. I believe in her book Tori admits to having her assistant break the news to her first husband she was leaving him after just a year of marriage. But I’m gossiping because I haven’t read the book…
On Wed, Jun 11, 2014 at 5:54 PM, Tamara Tattles wrote:
>
You were extremely brave to recap this mess. I don’t believe a word that Tori says and her Mother’s book totally negates everything Tori has EVER said. I read her Mother’s book and I believe her. What she and that ridiculous idiot she married (Dean) are doing to those children is criminal and someone should call Child Protective Services. Liam is already acting out and I can see headlines in his future that match the ones about Lindsey Lohan. I watched the whole thing…the entire series..the reunion, the confessions..all of it and I am not a better person. I am now a bitter person blaming myself for wasting my precious time. Sadly, she isn’t just ugly when she’s crying……
“The Donna Martin graduates” line comes from that awful storyline on 90210 when Donna gets drunk at prom and is banned from graduating, all the kids stage a huge walk out to support her graduating with them. The crowd is super annoying in their support, all yelling “Donna Martin graduates!”
Donna Martin was the Hayley Mills of Beverly Hills. And that rhymes..
Yes, I got that. Just not what it had to do with kinky sex. That is until several people commented and explained.
I thought it was because she was a virgin for most of the show. Sorry so late..just started reading your blogs and I am working my way backwards. I need to get back to work lol
I’m so flattered. When I used to get to READ blogs instead of write them, I would find I blog I loved and start at the beginning too! I never thought I’d have one that someone would do that with. There are some ugly posts in there, please overlook my hormonal moments and self-indulgence at times. And welcome! I hope you comment a lot!
I haven’t read her book either…and have no intention
of doing so. I loooove to read but I wouldn’t read her book if it was the only book in the world.
I read books for pleasure and learning. I would accomplish nothing from her book. I feel certain of this.
I’m so glad I changed the channel and never looked back when this show first came on the air. I think I watched all of 10 minutes….it was just too depressing.
I watched for about 10 mins too, but I turned it off because of all the ugly crying I saw in that time, not because it was depressing.
TT thank you for biting the bullet, and watching the unwatchable, for us poor slobs that want to know what is going on, but cannot bring ourselves to watch!
I just love your updates.
As a fellow Canadian to Heidi Handjob, I suspect the reason no one has been able to find her is that we are quite private. Heck, we can’t even remember the name of our own Prime Minister’s wife half the time, nor is she spoken of. The media in Canada wouldn’t hunt this woman down based solely on the fact that the majority of the people in Canada don’t even know who Dean is. Dean was smart to choose a Canadian mistress; she probably didn’t even know who he was either. LOL
I’m pretty sure Dean was a heartthrob in Canada back in the day, which is why he got the gig. I might be wrong. Anyway, it is very suspicious that nobody can find a trace of this girl on the internet. She must have some big bucks for a thorough internet scrub. I find that strange, but for them to subject their kids to this garbage for a reality show paycheck would be so low, I can’t conceive of that. All I learned is that Dean needs to have his eyes done. He need to learn how to wash his hair and shave.
As I recall, Tori actually had her then (now ex-) husband come in for one of her counseling sessions that she had been attending alone up to this point. The guy sat down, and the counselor said that Tori wanted to tell him something. She divulged her affair and desire to divorce after a year of marriage.
I think her and Dean deserve each other. Two hot rotisserie messes…
T, thanks for taking one for the team. I don’t want to watch it but I am so grateful for your recap. I have also stopped watching RHOC and your recaps are great. xo
Molly Goodhand? If that’s not a porn/stage name, I will eat my “keyboard”. She’s probably even a . . . . man!
Tori is freaking CRAZY!! I’ve always watched her crazy shows, I was a big 90210 fan also. I’ve always felt it was a matter of time before Dean got busted cheating…I’ve felt for a while he was doing what he wanted and that included getting with the ladies..no evidence, other than his selfishness, which has been shown alot on their other shows…but I do think Dean loves the kids and has tried primarily for them. But this is freaking nutty, her kids are watching her wallow in self pity and she wants them to. She wants everyone to look and boo hoo with her…girl please: you’re a cheater who married a cheater and now your mad cause you got what you wasn’t caring about giving…what did she think she and Dean made the most important pact of all time?
Girl BYE!
Not my place to say, T, but you realize that you could be watching FARGO at 10 pm on Tuesdays? And be riveted to the screen. Riveted, I tell you!
Last night, they opened the epi with “Erstwhile on Fargo….”. The literary crowd went nuts!
beeDEE
Funny you should mention that, BEEdee. I was just about to post about Fargo. It will not be interesting or witty. But I feel obligated because I made some of y’all watch it.
Does this mean that Tori will quit posting happy holiday pics and posts of the family now? We aren’t going to see the brood hamming it up together at a fourth of July BBQ with a caption that reads, “roasting dogs on the grill with my favorite people” are we? Thanks for watching TT. I can not. It just hurts too much.
Please Dear Lord and Sonny Jesus, don’t let Tori and Dean have any more reality shows. Amen.
[email protected] some of the comments. PLEASE BABY JESUS….don’t show anymore trainwrecks on Tv. Amen. We need some uplifting shows, to balance all of the Bad Juju….that’s been happening on TV.
“Is it wrong that while Dean and Liam were in the bounce house I was wishing it was one of the ones that got airlifted into the sky?”
Classic! Thanks for the laugh!
I just don’t think any of this is real…it just can’t be. Can it?? They must have come up with this BS for the paycheck.
I honestly didnt have the energy to watch this trash. Its my opinion that this was a small incident that they played up for a check. if thats how you gotta pay the bills, do what you gotta i guess but I honestly wouldve rather them do another show that revolved around the kids than tori and dean becuase a. they’re boring and have no real talents (in this decade, 90210 have been off the air for YEARS and name something dean’s done) to speak of b. theyre more marketable/likeable as the parents of all these cute ginger children (I lived for baby liam, the kid had personality) and it wouldve been a bigger payout to possibly watch them try to keep the spelling showbiz legacy alive by letting the kids break into the business the right way, auditions and plays/ commercials and ect.
S T O P B R E E D I N G !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THANK GOD you recapped this-I am in Florida and can you believe our hotel did not have Lifetime? Anyway. If I had to guess (and I didn’t watch 90210 either) I’m guessing butt sex, whips, chains, public place sex…anything but threesomes. My take on Emily/Heidi/Molly-there was someone, but for whatever reason they have decided to call her Emily Goodhand and put all of Dean’s numerous sexy hamburger times onto one girl. The reason they haven’t come forward? No amount of money in the world could make them admit they did it with Dean Spelling. It had been speculated that Tori may have a pain pill addiction-hence all the time laying in bed. Also, her first book directly contradicts what she says about Dean not letting her grieve for her father.
Ha ha, I wouldn’t admit it if I hooked up with Dean for any amount of money!
What a funny, funny, recap. All I can add is “go on with your bad self” TT.
Why is she a poor lil ol me character? WASN’T her dad loaded? Why is she embarrassing herself n her family on TV if she came feom Money. Why is she acting like a trailer park honey?! She layed down with a dog….and she would up with fleas. Hey…didn’t she dump her nice spouse for this mess of a man?! Perhaps, this is her karma? On Jun 11, 2014 4:39 PM, “Tamara Tattles” wrote: > > tamaratattles posted: ” Oh Lord. I don’t know why I feel like I must do this. I feel like I have seen the train wreck and I might as well look. Why is Tori always in bed? She is going to narrate the whole show from her bed. UGH. She is trying to use her sexy voice, or her ho” >
On 90210 Donna Martin was a virgin for like the first few seasons. It actually pissed a lot of fans off because everyone else on the show was doing it with everyone else, and of course, many fans attributed that to her being Aaron Spellings daughter.
The thing with the biggest ewwww factor here (besides basically the whole show) is that she spoke about all that extreme sex that she and Dean had and she wants her children to watch this one day. She’s one sick Mama. I can’t stress enough how bad I feel for those kids.
I recently did some online research, and I gotta say, I no longer believe that this was real. I’m sure Dean has cheated (because he’s a gross, slimy pig), but this particular story… not buying it. I actually wrote you an email about it with a link to the final article I read that sealed my decision, but I never ended up sending it.