Note: Sorry for the erroneous update. I am used to talking to Joyce and wasn’t paying attention. I have removed the update from here as it was a fan site twitter account. Of course this took forever as the laptop decided to crash….ugh…going back to bed.
It’s always fun to see what the ladies choose to wear on the reunion. Yesterday’s Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Reunion was rather traumatic for some. But what about their fashion choices? How did those work out?
It seems the ladies all chose to go with a shorter dress. Shorter dresses can be a good choice but the hem line is everything! A dress that is too long or too short for the person wearing it can ruin the look no matter how expensive the dresses. The reunion hemline winners are Carlton and Kyle. Their dresses fall at the perfect spot just above the knee. If you are going for a hemline at or around knee-length, Kyle and Carlton did it right. Kim’s hemline is a good two inches too short. Because Kim’s is petite her hem length is crucial and two more inches of skirt would have drastically improved her look. Brandi needed another inch, not because she is petite like Kim , but because she has a long torso and the very high neck and low peplum top makes her bottom half look completely disproportionate. Joyce’s skirt is also too short. When she puts her leg out it look like the skirt hits close to the right spot, but when she stands up straight with her feet together it’s too short. Plus, she is going to have to worry about flashing her who-hah at the camera all day long. Lisa and Yolanda have the opposite problem and both need their hems raised a couple of inches. Both of their hemlines make their dresses look matronly. Click through for my overall rankings.
Tamara Tattles Reunion Dress Rankings 2014
1) Kyle. Her dress is even more attractive than it appears here. I love that she accessorizes the plum bandage dress with emerald green earrings. My only critique of Kyles look is that she needed to wear a bra. #BestofShow.
2) Carlton. Carlton’s dress was a very close second. It fits nicely, it’s a good color for her, and it looks good on television. It’s not a drop dead head turner (and neither is Kyle’s) but everything is in the right place, including her third witch’s teat.
3) Yolanda. I am sure this dress costs a billion dollars, but failure to properly tailor makes it look dowdy. I love the color, and it’s always better to err on too long than too short.
4) Joyce. Y’all know I love Joyce and the dress is lovely but this dress does not fit her. The whole thing looks like it shrank in the wash, or that she yanked it off a Little Miss Teen pageant winner. Love her, but this was a miss.
5)Kim. I think this dress is supposed to be a mini-dress on a normal sized person. This is an example of why we shuttle short people off to their own department so they can get mini-adult sized clothes. There is nothing wrong with the dress it’s just on the wrong person.
6)Brandi. Basically, you just can’t put a whore in office attire. It looks like something you would see at a Wednesday night church service where people go straight from their paralegal job to the sanctuary. And the skirt doesn’t fit right. And it’s not reunion wear. It’s just 50 shades of wrong.
7)Lisa. Oh Darling! What were you thinking. I mean did you get beyond “pink” in your process? You have eleventy billion pink dresses in your closet worth more than the gross national product of many third world countries and you pick some matronly lace-sleeved monstrosity? Were you planning on shopping on senior citizen day immediately afterward and hoping for the discount? I can’t believe anyone allowed you to do this. It’s dreadful.
Please share you comments below. If you disagree with me, clearly you are wrong, but go ahead, I’m feeling accommodating today.