I am slightly worried since Andy’s great debacle last night of putting Cynthia second chair over some Bravo nobody that he will do it again. But surely not. He is in awe of Yolanda and her husband David Foster.
Fuck I am already 10 minutes behind. I love it she loves lemons! and she is a giant sour puss! BOTH guests have new hair cuts! Yolanda says her hair has never been this short. Tara Lapinski is the bartender!
Stassi claims to be mortified by backhanding Kristen. I don’t believe her. She is a grade A cunt and for her to even feign embarrassment means that JAX LIED AGAIN. #spoiler. Yolanda is an R Kelly fan she says he was her favorite act at the Clive Davis Grammy party. #underagesex Andy asks about her health. She says the Lyme disease never stops, she is showing 20% improvement on her brain scan. I still think she is misdiagnosed. #NotADoctorPlayOneOnInternet. But “Chronic Lyme” is not a real thing. Google it . Lyme Disease is but not CHRONIC Lyme Disease. Whatever, Yolanda is gorgeous.
Last time Stassi was on the show, she was with Jax and it was awkward. Poll question. Kristen or Stassi? I hope like hell people call in and say Kristen just because Stassi is a HUGE Cunt Satchel of Hideousness. Andy plays a retrospective of her hideousness. Stassi feigns shame.
Andy mocks Kim Richards by replaying the horrid scenes they showed tonight.
By the way, Stassi’s hair looks fantastic! I am not sold on Yo’s new look yet.

Questions for Stassi:
Is the text that Jax showed to Tom on the beach the same text that you sent to sent to Jax pretending to be Kristen? Stassi looks toward Andy for guidance Stassi says… um no.. um…. on the next episode you find out all of this. SO YES THE BITCH SET KRISTEN UP! OMG! That is why she is not pissed at JAX. Everyone wonders why she is not pissed at Jax now we know. KRISTEN AND JAX DID NOT SLEEP TOGETHER #spoiler
Well then. How did Jax know to deny it when you were texting him from Kristen’s phone? Andy ads “Do you know the answer to this?” Stassi says, “Yes I do know the answer to this.” Andy says, “Next week?” and Stassi the giant Cuntsicle says, “Yes.”
I’m pretty sure Stassi is the biggest cunt that was ever a cunt and that was why she was attracted to Jax. Just saying.
Will you ever forgive Kristen? No Absolutely not.
How many times have you been tested for STDs since you have been with Jax? That is so inappropriate! Look, cunt satchel, it’s really not. Do you watch your show?
Do you regret slapping her? Yes. But she says that for everything to all be true… sigh. I HATE THIS SHOW AND THE BACK AND FORTH. I think it is NOT true at this point.
Would you ever bang Tom to get revenge on Kristen? Absolutely not.
Why do you believe Jax now since he lies ALL the time? Because NORMALLY when he does it he does it to cover his ass and she never saw this storyline coming. Because she was in on it. he has never once lied to make himself look worse until he got on TV.
How do you feel about his lack of remorse? It’s distrurbing and it is why we are not together.
How do you feel about Jax banging GG? Stassi says she is very happy for them. She wants Jax to find a good girl.
Questions for Yolanda:
Why are you/is everyone so negative about Kyle? “Um I don’t think I am negative about Kyle, I think it is spread pretty evenly. I mean I think everyone gets a turn in that group. And obviously me and Kyle had a little incident last year where we both have a different perception of what happened a conversation and we both believe that we were right and um, you know, we’ve move from there and I don’t have anything negative to say of her.”
You said there was nothing uglier than a drunk woman so why you don’t seem to mind Brandi’s drunkenness? I can’t stand it. I hate it. I tell her all the time. But like I always say, I am not her mother and I don’t like it.
You and Brandi have gotten very close are you still? Yo really is noncommittal here… she says well when we shoot and we see each other every day…. Sounds like major distancing to me. Um, yeah we see each other.
Which of the Housewives annoys David the most? All of them.
Why are you upset if people cancel on you? Don’t you understand that shit happens? Shit happens but I think that when you make plans with someone we all have children we all have families we all manage a lot of things. You commit to somebody you keep that commitment and if you don’t want to keep it…then pick up the phone and be appropriate about it!
WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT!
BREAKING FUCKING NEWS THAT ANDY IS TRYING TO PLAY OFF! G
BETHENNY FRANKEL’S TALK SHOW IS AIRING ALL WEEK AT 6 PM! WHAT THE FUCK! ???? IT PAYS TO HAVE FRIENDS IN THE INDUSTRY!
Brandi tweeted.. oh… I thought we were closer Yolanda. We had dinner plans last Saturday until you had to cancel last second. SO MUCH TEA! Yolanda is laughing and trying to hide behind hair she no longer has…. She says, yes she did but there was a family emergency. Of the order of no one wants to be associated with Brandi Glanville anymore.
Poll Question: 52% Kirsten 48% Retarded Mongoloids who watch this show.
How many times have you been tested for STDs since you have been with Jax? Great question and even better comeback Tamara.
“Which of the Housewives annoys David the most? All of them” made me laugh. Just because he seems so arrogant, I would love to have Yolanda answer which of David’s ex-wives annoy her the most.
I have a question! did kristen actually file a police report or press charges on stassi for assault?
No. She didn’t… At the end of the day she wants to be in Stassi’s camp. It’s sad to see
thanks for answering. messy chicks.
Proof that Jax is lying about Kristen texting him about them hooking up. This is from the episode that Stassi uses kristen’s phone to text jax….which is the same text that jax shows Tom & Tom reads it allowed at the beach!
“Dude jax delete this text right when you get this. But this whole thing is becoming a big issue. So I need to know if you told anyone else about us so I can cover my basis again delete this text.” BOOM mystery solved I fcking win!This is the same text that Tom reads at the beach thinking it’s his gf, but it was actually Stassi! bam. Idk why I watch this shit it’s all fake anyhow lol This photo is from the episode that stassi texts jax off of kristens phone. LINK TO THE PHOTO PROOF OF THE TEXT http://s-miotic.tumblr.com/post/74812580961/proof-that-jax-is-lying-about-kristen-texting-him I apologize about posting a link but this is the only way I could show you the photo
Clarissa, you are brilliant. I saw that too and was like, wait…, but didn’t take the time to investigate. What horrible trainwrecks Jax and Stassi are. Anything for their 15mins, including throwing their “bestfriends” under the bus INTENTIONALLY. So pathetic.
Yolanda just checked Brandi on twitter. Lol she doesn’t play.
I noticed on tonight’s RHOBH when David came to see the ladies and then he called them hens as he excused himself, Brandi, in her typical trashy fashion said something like “Our cock is leaving”, and he was like “what did you just say?”. He was not amused. Looks like he isn’t going to fall for her naughty flirtations the way Ken did. Ooops.
My comment is being moderated?!? What’s up with that? Lol
WordPress loves to randomly pick comments and toss em in moderation. It’s happened to or will happen to all of us at some point.
Sometimes FAT FINGERED PEOPLE mistype their email addy and it moderates like a first time comment. 🙂 Or something. I dunno. I try to clear moderated comments ASAP. 🙂
I think WordPress was just having fun with me. My email address is always in that box. I never have to type it. I thought maybe I was naughty recently our something. 😉
Dying at Yolanda’s response to Brandi trying to throw shade!!! Check mate!!
She is the worst, that Stassi and now it really makes me wonder about …. Lisa. I’ve liked her character however she seems staunchly in Stassi’s corner and if this is her daughters bff, what the hell? Is it all money and exposure for Lisa, that she’d associate w/ this?
I’m wondering why Lisa is all up in this mess of Stassi’s. I don’t believe Kristen slept w/Jax and Stassi is doing the same thing Kristen did about Tom having slept with Ariana. Lisa owns Sur and to me she displays being the owner/manager very unprofessional. I thought she had more class than to be getting involved in her employees personal/sexual lives. It’s ridiculous.
Pandora and Stassi being BFF’s isn’t totally believable to me. First season we were told they were, this season Lisa has said Pandora and Sheana are and have been BFF’s for a long time. Lisa herself has flip flopped on where she stands when it comes to Stassi. In one scene with Sheana she’s not a fan of Stassi and in a scene with Stassi things are great. It’s all for the show. Just like they can’t keep the timelines straight of how long each person has worked for Lisa at SUR and Villa Blanca.
In my not so humble opinion Vandershit Pumps is bogus.
Seriously, does anybody here think that any restaurant is run like this?? If I were the boss at any restaurant, I would never and I mean NEVER associate with my employees like Lisa V appears to do on the show. And beyond that, every one of these so called employees would be fired! This kind of crap is not even close to appropriate or acceptable on any level.
That is specifically why I think that this program is just as staged and manipulated and edited beyond continuity, scenes are inserted and scenes are dumped in order to make the “script” seem more interesting like “reality shows” are!
I wouldn’t doubt that all of these would be “characters” are simply “actors” horny to get an acting job.
And I actually watch this stupid program. So how freakin’ hypocritical is THAT??!!?? But, I admit my hypocrisy for the sheer entertainment value of watching people all over the place implode on a regular basis on these dumb shows.
Totally agree with your comment. I think they are all actors, and Lisa won’t fire them, for they are paid actors pretending to be (waiters/waitresses) for her show. I don’t believe none of this nonsense about Jax sleeping with Kristen, and Stassi being outraged. Remember when Kyle had a party at her house, and Lisa sent the staff to cater it? After the party, Kyle told them to clean up, and they look shell-shocked. They acted as if this wasn’t part of their job, and had no clue as of what to do. This is when I realized, this show was scripted, and fake. I think that Kristen is moving on, and wants off the show, so they have to find a reason for her to leave. They are entertaining, and we love to hate Stassi, lol.
First off… TT I worship thee and this blog. You’re tea is my own blood of Christ…. (You’ll notice I capatalized that cause I’m a Christian/ Wiccan/ Vegan gay y’all!!!) You’re use if “cunt” is perfect in this… Stassi is a cunt and she does it right! Bitch can read other bitches… But it’s like ESL reading.. As far as Yolanda goes I ain’t gonna say shit cause bitch will choke me!
And my use if ‘you’re’ versus ‘your’ is offensive
Did they not post my shit?!
They posted my shit.. I was too drunk to know… I’m as messy as Brenda
Was it illiterate? If I can’t determine the point, I just trash it. Or if you used stupid names for people instead of their real names…. Not everyone makes the cut.
After Jax finishes sleeping with each girl what will be the shows’ storyline?
All Lisa’s appearaces on the show are so scripted with bad acting.
Peter is so cute.
Andy and bravo are NOT going to force me to watch Bethanny . I will set my DVR to record the 1am showing of shahs cuz bravo is not getting any ratings for B from me. I think it’s hilarious how she’s basically stolen Ellen’s and Wendy’s format and her show still sucks. Her failed marriage and need to tell people how to handle relationships is laughable seeing how horrible she was to her husband. And I cannot let go of the episode where she had omarosa on and got caught lying and still wouldn’t shut the fuck up. She is completely the definition of white privilege and like TT pointed out will steamroll her crappy failing show with her millions down our throats until we like it. I really liked her during the first season of the housewives of NY until I saw what a heartless cunt she really is.
Amen to all of this!
Nail on the head!!!!!!
Word!!
“white” privilege? I’m white, not in the least privileged, so what does ones whiteness have to do with privilege?
Oh Lord, here we go… I guess I should go read this one in context. I hate how we all get so caught up in what color everyone is…
I’ll bite and give an example of white privilege. Mackelmore. Or twerking, I’m 25 and back when I was a kid it was called booty popping ,we’ve been doing it for years it goes back to a less perverted African culture ( my parents are Haitian so it’s always been frowned on by my family) but Smiley does it and it becomes mainstream and put into websters as shaking one hips . When in reality it involves the ass which is a trait black people have an advantage of. The dictionary completely omitted the ass part because let’s face it white females do not have big butts. In Bethany’s case she believed she was somewhat superior to omarosa as a businesses woman. To phrase it as omarosa did Bethany was pushing cup cakes when she came to bravo. Omarosa was working in the white house and has a degree. White privilege allows white/Caucasian people to be praised for mediocre shit or for doing things the black community BEEN doing….example A&B mackelmore & twerking….I rambled a little but I’ve got a 6year old daughter and a 11 month son with upper respiratory infections thanks to this 30* then 75* then 30* weather we’ve been having in Florida. I’m sleep deprived.
Bethenny with a B (itch) needs to take her “strap on” off and actually let a man be a man.
Her “husband” didn’t have a chance of being a snowball in H3ll to make that marriage work. I actually think that B just wanted a child and he was the most likely donor.
Too bad, because I initially liked her on NY especially when she was exposing the twit that “whatshername” was, the one that went total wacky/crazy and sh*t on the island trip.
I loved Jason! I mean I would’ve cut his parents weekend visits to monthly visits but other than that I loved him. I feel bad for him because he was hesitant to quit his Job to work full time with Bethany. And now what foes she do? Divorce him
Cunt-sicle and cunt-satchel are the 2 funniest insults I’ve ever heard in my life!
Agreed! very witty Tamara Loved it!
My mama would be so proud. #rollinginhergrave
I like Yolanda’s hair, it makes her look youthful!
It looks so much better than that long, thin string of straw that she always pulled back anyway. Much more age appropriate. Now if Lisa would stop wearing those false eyelashes that look like wads of black felt ready to fall off I would be a happy woman! 🙂
yo’s hair stands out like a helmet or wig, tho. can’t decide whether it’s an improvement or not…
It’s about time she hacked off that hay. (Maybe now she can afford Two horses….) *sighs
A few days ago I learned “douche canoe” and now its “cunt satchel”. TT you are The Guardian of the Vulgar in the Vernacular. #BowDownWitches
Yolanda responded to Brandi’s tweet with the following tweet
@YolandaHFoster: @BrandiGlanville @Andy ❤Please, Think before you speak Brandi, there is a child’s privacy involved in this conversation so back off!!!!!
Whatever that means! But I do think that Yolanda is beginning to get over her liking of Brandi. And I am glad for that
Thanks for posting the tweet. I’m too busy crafting a tea bong to chug all the tea TT is pouring to go look stuff up.
I think Yolanda is playing the child card after Brandi called her out. That made me laugh. I don’t watch Vanderpump but the recaps have me looking side eyed at Lisa.
LOL don’t OD!
hey TT, did you and Andy make up after your twitter tiff? That pic makes me think about volunteering to be his “try it you might like it” experiment.
what experiment? I’m not following. But I am not a guinea pig. lol.
Stassi is the reason I do not watch this show. I tried last season and just could not get past Stassi. Love your blog on this show. I read your blog just to see what is going on.
clarification please!! Is Bethenny’s show being aired on BRAVO everyday at 6…?? WOW if so!! That girl knows how to work connections.
Bravo’s Facebook page just posted this –
Bravo’s bringing you A SPECIAL WEEK of THE BEST of BETHENNY!
Can’t get enough of former Real Housewives of New York City star Bethenny Frankel? Catch our favorite eps. of Bethenny – along with some of our beloved Bravolebrities – all week long @ 6/5c only on BRAVO!
wow…thanks Karma!
First time reading this blog annnnd I am hooked! I wish you could see my Life and recap it. There aren’t many cunt- sicles or count sachets but there is a mofo of a soon to be 2nd ex husband and the humor you could bring would enrich my life as that twat collector really tests my will not to wear prison orange.
Keep on blogging TT!
Bethany is coming to Bravo. Hmm since she is basically turning her show into interviewing housewives, do you think she is gunning for Andy’s spot on WWHL?
Please no. I just can’t with her.
Bravo is just running a Best of Bethenny week. Not bringing her show there full time..yet anyway.
OK I just watched this episode, and Tara Lipinski was the guest bartender. Is it just ME or does she have a cheek enhancement thing going on with her face? Isn’t she too young to be doing that to herself?
I don’t remember. But I do remember thinking I knew who Tara Lapinski was, but I didn’t recognize her. I am, as you know, terrible with my facial recognition skills.
Actually, she’s had those chipmunk cheeks since her Olympic skating days. I find her absolutely adorable!
Is it me, or Yolanda looks like Ellen Barkin with this new haircut?
Also, it is fascinating how she is distancing herself from Brandi.
Ellen Barkin is exactly who I thought she looked like.
I for one, am just happy she got rid of that ridiculous “wet look” overly back-combed mess! JMO
Yolanda should have taken out those bad hair clip-ins before.
Guess you should stop and think that possibly you might be wrong before being so adamant about something. I do love your blogs but you look a little foolish stating something for fact and being so wrong.
There is always a chance we are wrong even when we feel so certain. Just saying.
Again, I love your blogs and read every last one of them.
What on earth are you talking about?