Episode 7: “The Dead” is thematic for all the characters in this episode. Used to be dead…Will be dead…Wants to be dead…Doesn’t want to be dead…and I’m going to kill you dead. In the realm of AHS:Coven dead is NOT dead.
Kyle and Madison who have died & were revived are trying to adjust to their undead life. Madison feels nothing, but wants to live by feeling anything again; while Kyle is in agony and wants to die. Fiona is dying but desperate to live longer, but Cordelia is planning on killing her…and Hank is planning on killing everyone. The Axeman who was once dead is now alive and seduces Fiona with creepy lines like “The reason for living is to get ready to stay dead a long time”…. Immortal Delphine wishes she was dead while Marie is torturing her psycho-racist ass in horrific ways. If that’s not enough death, Zoe murders Spalding for his unnatural love with the dead…. Despite the death theme, half of the Coven got LAID in freaky ways by screwing the dead. A FrankenKyle witch on witch threesome and some serial killer ghost sex for Fiona.
In a flashback scene the show starts off trying to make Toto as relevant as Stevie Nicks, but that is NOT possible. Kyle is with friends at a tattoo shop, and he does not want a tattoo because it will upset his mom. His buddy jokes that he’ll bang her to get her mind off of it, and Kyle grimaces & then laughs it off. Kyle tells of his goal to be an engineer because he wants to prevent levees from breaking again during hurricanes, and he doesn’t want to be judged for having a tattoo… Kyle is preparing ahead for a bright future. It seems he had some hope despite his problems at home.
Its present day at the Academy, and Zoe has Kyle chained up in the greenhouse. He notices tattoos on his arm & leg, the ones that used to be on his friend’s arm and leg. He freaks out realizing that his body is not his own. To put him out of his misery Zoe wants to shoot Kyle with the gun that she found in Madison’s room in last week’s episode. Instead he grabs the gun to commit suicide but Zoe had a change of heart, and she struggles to get the gun away though a shot was misfired.
Madison looks like an awful Goth-girl post revival. She has an internal monologue that doubles as a social commentary about her generation’s sense of entitlement & narcissism influenced by social media and their numbness to the world and its suffering. In her angst filled life, including her gang rape, she is numb to her emotional pain. After her resurrection she can’t feel anything so she carelessly consumes excessive amounts of herbs, medicine, food, and later on sex just to get some feeling or consequence. She doesn’t even feel her hand burn when she holds it over a flame. She is alive but feels dead, “I think I’m going batshit. I need to do something.”
Delphine is hungry for a late night snack but Queenie ate all the food in a late night binge. So Queenie takes her to the drive-thru in a mildly funny scene where Delphine claims that’s best food she ever ate. In a heart to heart chat Queenie calls her Miss Daisy the immortal racist and confesses that she does not feel accepted by her Coven sister-witches because she is fat. Delphine tells her that her Coven will never accept her because she’s “black as coal”. Yep she pulled out the race card which enlightened Queenie who knows she’s a descendant from voodoo witches even though she lives with the Salem witches.
Hank is surrounding by a cache of guns & ammo when he calls his wife begging to come home. Cordelia hangs up on him, and why does she have a rotary phone? That was odd. It looks like he is going to try to comply with Marie’s orders to kill the Salem witches.
The Axeman killed an elderly jazz musician for his roach infested apartment and brought Fiona there to seduce her. How creepy sexy is that? Done in a gritty movie noir style, they are listening to jazz & chugging bourbon and flirting in a breathy conversation of seduction. He recites Faulkner to impress her, and she is playing hard to get while showing off her legs. Her witchy sensibility tells her that there is a dead body in the bath tub, but danger with a murderous stranger is making her horny. Plus Fiona could handle the risks of a psycho one night stand with all her powers. When clumps of her hair fall out she starts to flake out to leave and tells him that she is an awful miserable wretched bitch. He doesn’t care, he just wants sex. Then he ramps up his seduction with double entendres about “playing his instrument” as his “magic fingers” touch her crotch. After more breathy seduction Fiona gives in to temptation, and the chemistry between the witch and the ghost cause all the light bulbs in the room to EXPLODE. Was that real or symbolically orgasmic? Or does that happen every time Fiona gets the lady tingles? She is a self-admitted slut, and I bet she has stock in General Electric.
It’s the next morning, and Cordelia finds out that Madison is back, and when she touches her she sees that Fiona has killed her… Cordelia is talking to Zoe and getting buzzed on some spiked tea. She calls her a “hot shit witch” for conjuring the Axeman’s spirit and then sending him away. Cordelia warns Zoe that her powers are a bull’s eye on her back for Fiona because she will kill any witch that may be the new Supreme. At first Zoe doesn’t believe that Fiona killed Madison, but Cordelia tells her “If she even thinks your next, YOU’RE NEXT”. Her solution, “We’re going to kill my mother. Kill her once. Kill her good. Kill her DEAD.” ….Hello drunk witch-killer Cordelia, like mother like daughter.
Zoe has unchained Kyle and brought him upstairs to the bedroom and is giving him a flash card lesson on a few basic words. He freaks out at the word bed. That’s his mother’s fault. He has another of his grunting tantrums just as Madison walks into the room. She doesn’t immediately remember that he is one of the guys she killed on the bus, or that he is the guy they resurrected at the morgue. After Zoe leaves, Madison is admiring her reassembled creation with all “the good pieces”. In her desperate need to feel something she tries to bond with him since they both are unable to deal with their post revival existence. They share a tender embrace which escalates to him wildly fucking her against the armoire which a SHOCKED Zoe accidentally walks in on.
While Marie is buying buckets of fish heads for her gumbo Queenie comes to her hair salon. She is hesitantly standing in the doorway because she is violating the witches’ truce. “Are you going to come in Queenie?” She wants to know how she knows her name, “Black witch comes to town I’m gonna hear about it. Surprised it took you this long to come see me”. Queenie has never had gumbo, and Marie tells her “Not surprised. Livin’ over there at wonder bread land. They probably feed you Shake-n-Bake and watermelon for dessert.” Marie tells her that Salem witches got their power from the Voodoo witches. She is schooling Queenie that the other witches will never treat her the same because she’s black. Queenie tries to defend her Coven, but Marie tells her they have evil under their roof, Madame Delphine LaLaurie…and bitches about Fiona digging up her “horror in a box”. If Queenie wants to be with “her own people” the Voodoo witches, she has to bring Delphine to Marie. She adds that she will only be considered second best to those white girls, “Voodoo doll belongs in the House of Voodoo, and if you mix your witch with our voodoo, the Supreme won’t be able to touch you”.
Fiona is getting dressed for her morning walk of shame, and the Axeman wants to see her again. She tells him their romantic game was nice, but there’s a dead body in his bathtub. He reminds her of the “light show” they had during sex, and then he tells her she is no angel either especially since she always has someone (Spalding) to clean up her messes. She is suddenly uncomfortable with him as he tells her he knows all about her and her secrets. He confessed when she was 8 years his ghostly spirit protected her from a bully by knocking over a cabinet. Fiona remembers the incident and is confused by him. “Who are you? What are you?” she wants to know. At first he felt like a father figure to her, protecting his little flower. He watched her grow up (and undress), and he is in love with her. Fiona doesn’t believe in ghosts and slaps him for the story that he is trying to seduce her with, “Go haunt someone else’s life”.
Spalding is tied down to his bed in some awful bright colored robe. When he wakes up Zoe asks him how he is doing. He answers “fine”. HE SPEAKS NOW! He is just as shocked as us viewers. Apparently Zoe found Spalding’s severed tongue in a box along with the spirit board from episode 6. Because it was enchanted by Myrtle it was still wet and alive, and since she’s more powerful than Myrtle she reattached it with a spell. I’m still saying bull shit that Zoe will be the new Supreme. She plans to get the truth about Madison’s killer. He tries to resist telling the truth but he can’t, and moans out “Fiona Goode”. He declares his allegiance to Fiona, and that his family has been part of this Coven for ten generations, and the resident slayer Zoe stabs in him right through his heart. It was ironic & funny that he died with his tongue sticking out of his mouth.
Fiona is in her bathroom and frustrated that more of her hair is falling out. She plugs in some clippers and almost starts to shave her head. Then she hears a saxophone playing, whether real or just imaginary, and she puts down the clippers. Jazz music never sounded so creepy to me before. I think it was just used for effect to let us know that she is thinking about the Axeman and his love for her, and the way they made those light bulbs go POP BOOM POW…. Fiona goes back to the jazz bar and finds the Axeman and offers to buy him a drink. #HowFionaGotHerGrooveBack.
With homage to the movie “Psycho” Zoe is in the shower with Spalding’s blood draining at her feet. Madison interrupts her to talk about her sexy time with FrankenKyle. She tells Zoe she must like Kyle because she brought him back from the dead, and her killer vagina won’t be a problem because he is undead. Madison is still on her urge satisfying bender, and convinces Zoe that they both can use FrankenKyle as their boy toy. Next thing you know FrankenKyle is in the middle of a witch on witch ménage à trois . #GetYourFreakOn …. Kyle is still being used and sexually objectified by desperate women.
Queenie is trying to figure out what to do about Marie’s offer. She tells Delphine there’s a chance that they good become friends and asks her what the worst thing she has ever done “because you have to see the ugly to appreciate the good”. Delphine shares her greatest regret. She slaughtered her personal slave’s new born baby that was fathered by her husband and used the blood as a face mask for her punishment, and then taunted the slave with this fact which resulted in her committing suicide. Queenie was horrified, and Delphine just sealed her fate.
Queenie tricks Delphine into thinking she is talking her to get a new updated hairstyle. The sight gag is that Delphine is wearing a sparkly sweatshirt with a tiger on it as they walk through the 9th ward neighborhood. Marie confronts Delphine, and she is TERRIFIED. She can’t believe that Queenie would betray her this way. Marie’s helpers grab her, lock her in a cell, and shackled her arms to the front of the medieval coffin shaped door. Marie casually says she forgot to apply her Retin-A today, and offers Queenie to make the first cut while handing her rounded hook knife while Delphine is screaming in fear. Whether or not Queenie used her voodoo doll powers or whether she went straight for Delphine, Marie has a bowl of Madame LaLaurie’s blood (we assume). Marie is staring dead faced straight to the camera and slowly brushing Delphine’s blood on her face with long intense strokes; almost like a warrior preparing for war. Then she whispers “BEAUTIFUL”…. The End
This was a good episode with some shocking moments. What was your favorite scene or line from this episode? …. What kind of magic dick does the Axeman have? Or do Fiona’s powers just do explosive things during sexy times? Everyone sleeps with murderers in this show…. Cordelia & Zoe are turning into dark bad asses. Zoe should have gotten more secrets out of Spalding before she killed him, and I did not expect his tongue to come back. …but dead is not dead on Coven…. Is Cordelia going to find Kyle and touch him too (for the truth)? I would have loved to see more of Queenie & Delphine’s friendly banter, but that is obviously over. But was I wrong to feel a little bad for Delphine? Kathy Bates is that good in showing Delphine’s humanity, but NAH she deserves it… And Fiona is going to flip her SHIZZ when she finds out what Queenie did. Is Queenie safe with Marie? Should she be trusted? I can watch every scene with Angela B. on repeat all day, and I know we all died for Angela Bassett’s fierce face times with the camera. She made a bloody face look so beautiful….. Let’s continue our smart & silly discussions below. And you all can stalk me on twitter @Urethra_F .