Tonight’s RHONJ showdown with Teresa and Jac should be good. It is also going to be so interesting knowing that we know Tre might be in the big house by next season. As of now, this will be posted tomorrow morning unless it is so good and I can’t stand it and go to the McDonald’s parking lot or something to try and post. J Did Melissa just call Teresa her sister in her talking head about Sizzle Tan? Or did her actual sister do a billboard too?
Who’s gonna dress the girl’s Barbies when Tre goes to the pen? I spent a few moments thinking about raising them myself. They would have to read books and I’d take Gia off twitter. It’s time for Sunday dinner at the Giudices. The cousins are all so excited to see each other. I wonder how much they hype the kids up for these scenes. “Okay kids, when we start filming be super excited to see your cousins!” Also, Tre has cupcakes on the table, they look store bought. But, in one of the original bankruptcy documents (not the current one with the 39 charges) there was mention that Tre was trying to start a cupcake business. Now I am going to catch all these things I would not have paid attention to before. These little things will keep me interested as we go over the sins of Jac for billionth time. Can someone explain extensions to me? Melissa (and oddly also Elissa from BB15) always seem to be raking through their extensions with their fingers. Melissa does it at the dinner table! What is with that? Sunday dinner ended without any actual crucifixions.
The Manzo boys are still working on their restaurant. Which reminds me how much I miss my favorite housewife, Greggy Bennet. Why did he have to smarter up and leave Jersey? Big Al hates the Hoboken apartment. Al and Caroline are not getting along. This makes me sad. I think the apartment is more a getaway from Al than the trailing in the wake of her kids than I did before. Or they are just having a fight and that is what they chose to air. Albie is getting a bit cuter!
Melissa is very into getting a lot of fan in her hair for book cover photoshoot. Meanwhile, since Melissa was not in the shoot, they cast another young lady for the billboard with Joe. This will not go over well. The chick is laying all over Joe. I am sure she was covered with body oil and black hair spray after the shoot and took more showers than a victim of sexual assault afterward.
Jac talks about the importance of spending quality time with CJ and apparently that means taking him to a toy store for a photo op which will be shockingly interrupted for a phone call from Tre.
Once again it is time for a round of Get Rosie Laid. Mel and Joe and Rich and Kathy go to the gay bar. What could possibly go wrong here? Actually, it went fairly normally. I figured we would get a lot of inappropriate behavior from Joe and Rich. But they didn’t show any of that. Rosie got drunk and hit on a chick that was out of her league. I don’t think they will be talking again.
It’s almost time for the big hyped scene. I was worried that this show was going to be so good I would be compelled to dash off to a Wi-Fi spot right away but that ain’t happening. I REALLY WANT to go to this nice breakfast place with free Wi-Fi in the morning. That has been the plan for about a week and I am such a narco I can’t get up to go. Wish me luck.
Gia has on more makeup than Gretchen Rossi. Even Juicy Joe notices. Tre is proud of the billboard for Sizzle Tan (they did NOT use the two person pictures, wonder if Joe mentioned the female model to Melissa or if she will learn about it on the show?) but makes it clear that she shot a commercial. Always one upping, that Teresa. Gino calls his father stupid on the way to wherever they are going. Joe should have PULLED THE FUCKING CAR OVER RIGHT THERE! What is wrong with parents today?
Tre and Joe met Jac and Chris at a restaurant. Tre and Jac met alone. Tre points out that Jac drove a wedge between Tre and her brother. Jac talks about Tre not taking responsibility for her actions. Tre doesn’t take responsibility for her actions HOWEVER, that Melissa set up was Kim D and Jac KNEW IT. I still believe that to this day. That is the ONLY time I had ever taken up for Tre, and it caused an uproar on Tamara Tattles, but I do think that Teresa was blameless in THAT situation. Production was out to cause drama and they set Teresa up to look like the culprit. Tre wants an apology from Jac for saying that Juicy is cheating on her. Sigh, oh Teresa. Jacqueline is a major fucktard, but even Gia and Milania could tell you that Daddy cheats.
Meanwhile, Juicy Joe and Chris squash things and move on within the first few sips of wine in the cigar room.
Jac calls Tre a sociopath because of the phone call with Kathy! Um, really, you grabbed Kathy’s phone OUT OF HER HAND in the store and start a dramatic public display of stupidity and Tre is the sociopath? Tre calls Jac out for all of her twitter insanity and Jac admits she is impulsive on Twitter.
Ya know when I get impulsive on Twitter? When I am having a few PBRs while tweeting! I’ve never gotten impulsive on twitter when I was caring for a child with autism who requires a very time consuming special diet. Teresa says she thinks Jac is evil. This is one of my pet peeves. Evil is a very strong word. I like to save the word evil for people like Ariel Castro and elementary school principals who garb themselves in Christianity while living in the closet and kicking abused little girls who are being starved and abused in her own home out of their schools because they want to be hurtful to one of their teachers. Those are the evil people. Jac is stupid, egotistical, self-centered, morally corrupt, and reprehensible. She is not evil.
NEXT WEEK IS GREGGY’S GOODBYE PARTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAPPY DANCE!!!!!!!! Not that he left, but that we get to see him again! I sure do miss Greggy. Can’t Andy give him a spinoff in San Fran or wherever he is?