It’s a rainy night in Georgia, and I am full of chicken and clam chowder so this is probably going to be a slow plodding sleepytime recap. Maybe the fist fighting will get me amped up. Let’s watch what happens.
Well, that fight is not going to make the top fifty housewives fights let alone a man on man fight. What the fuck with Melissa getting in there to cover Joe’s head and dashing to him with his baseball cap and jamming it on his head. Why was Joe’s head not shown in the entire fight? Is he growing horns up there or something? That whole thing was weird. Why does Melissa think Tre should have stepped in to stop the fight? There was one time I tried to stop a fight with a man of mine and I quickly learned never to do that again after a week or two of lectures about what not to do in that situation. How the hell is Tre supposed to stop her husband from beating the shit out of Joe, exactly? What was the black stuff, spray on hair dye? Edit: Joey admits it. It was his “black hairspray.” /giggles
Joe was biting Juicy’s nuts! I believe that. I love how Rosie is telling the story as if Juicy started the fight. He went in yelling a Joey to “pologize” and before he could finish is sentence, little Joey charged him! At that point Joey deserved whatever happened to him, which to the best of my recollection was a couple of kidney punches and a headlock. These two should be embarrassed. They were hugging each other like boxers in the tenth round!
Kathy says she was worried about her nose job. At least she has her priorities in order. I have never really noticed it before but Joey always wears a hat. Bravo is bleeping “midget” now? Should he say the M word? For fuckssake the PC police are driving me crazy.
Interesting that Bravo elected to run a reel about Juicy’s criminal charges. Melissa won’t let Joey and Tre talk alone.
OMG, Opie and Susie Sunshine did not run for the hills! They are in Joey’s room. Teresa and Juicy take a bath together and have room service while the rest of the gang goes to dinner. Very smart. Then it is time for the call to Caroline, just as my sources told me during filming. And the arrival of Dr. V.
I cannot get over Melissa’s conversations with her husband about the fight. I have never in my life known a man who would not rip his wife’s head off for getting involved in a physical altercation between two men. She makes it sound like he needed help defending himself. Which he did, but you never say that to your man!
Dr. V is actually doing a pretty good job at this. She gave Joe the chance to bail, and then suggested he reconsider. This is the first real therapy they have had in a long time. OMG those tears are real on both sides. This looks like it’s going to work. But will it stick?
P.S. YAY for the Jacqueline-free episode!
So, I haven’t really been keeping up with NJ. I am just so over the bullsh*t, and every time it was on, I would find myself getting agitated quickly. However, I was interested to see JG head come off on other people, so tonight I tuned in. And, I got agitated. Quickly. After watching, I really don’t understand how the family can’t see that MELISSA is the one who wants to keep them apart. MELISSA blames her for EVERYTHING. And it is just too much to watch. I really, truly believe that Melissa doesn’t want her hubby to fix things with his sister. After tonight, it was so obvious.
And, another thing I cant STAND is what hypocrites Melissa and Joe are. They sling mud about Teresa every chance they get. But take no responsibility for it. I used to love to hate some of them….now I just HATE.
Is that normal? Maybe I need to walk away.
That is BS. Melissa has been abused by Teresa for years and is reacting. Anyone with any sanity would not want Teresa around her or her children; Teresa IS poison. The words “don’t throw your pearls before swine” were never illustrated better than when referring to the pig that is Teresa Guidice. However, I would like to apologize to all the pigs who don’t deserve to be compared to such a low life.
Cher, It’s BS to tell your husband to hate his sister and she’s the devil. Melissa kissed Teresa’s ring because she’s jeoulous of it. She wants to move her kids away from a person she hasn’t seen in a year? She calls people the devil but talks about her wine and fake book. Melissa knew that her husband and T were going to talk together and she didn’t want that which is why she was so obsessed with leaving. Oh, which devil scratched the other husbands face? Wasn’t Juicy Jo defending his wife like Melissa claims Joe is doing? Joe and Melissa should of been friends of the show instead of coming on the show to compete with Teresa.
LIKE! When you truly want your family to get along, you encourage it and let your ego take a back seat. This is just insecurity on Melissa’s part. Priceless comment from Tre was hey, I am not mother Teresa, I don’t go around saying thank you Jesus!
I’m with you, Gypsies, Tramps, and Thieves. Teresa anger was just building up.
Not a fan of this show but I think you’re right to an extent. Last season in the PFS episode, it was Melissa telling JG what to say to his sister as they were about to drive off.
Though we were warned ahead of time by TT that this season Melissa gets the shitty edit.
Say what you want about Joe Giudice, this fight still proves he’s the bigger man. He didn’t start it, but he was ready to finish it, without chewing on another man’s junk..
Watching him have to deal with being attacked on all sides and still stand, and then be willing to walk away?
I’m impressed. Man can handle himself physically and emotionally.
HOLY COW, Melissa is the devil. I don’t think the best of editing could keep that one a secret. Wow!
It annoys me how Richie was blaming Theresa for the fight. She was clearly upset about being called scum and just wanted to get out of there. And why would little Joe charge at him. All he said was pologise lol.
lol i totally agree with Jennifer, why did Gorga charge Juicy anyways?
Joey admitting he uses spray on hair is the first truly entertaining thing on this show in seasons! hehe
“Joey admitting he uses spray on hair is the first truly entertaining thing on this show in seasons!” LIKE
When did he admit to the man dye? Everybody is saying this is Tre’s fault to, nobody has a bad word to say about Meho and midget jumping Juicy. I can’t take much more of this show. Kathy kills me with the passive aggressive, and Rich i can’t right now. Melissa and Rich are smart enough to know that without the fighting with Tre there is no storyline for them. Both of them seem to not want them to make up. The Gorga’s blame Everything on Tre,they complain she doesn’t accept responsibility for anything they need to look in the mirror. Last but not least if the whole town is saying your wife is a cheater and stripper then she probably is.
I am going with hand jobs. People underestimate them but they take you places.
Boo to no Milania. Lauren is a miserable, negative twat. Joe Guidice kicked Gorga’s ass. And you’re so right. A woman should never get between fighting men. Which is why Richie had no business getting behind guidice and putting a headlock on him while gorga and three women slapped at guidice. Crazy how they all went in after him.
Joe Gorga crying made me sick. Something is wrong with him. I don’t know if he’s o steroids or retarded or was just over indulged as a child. But a grown man doesn’t go from charging someone to crying like a little bitch. He’s embarrassing.
Melissa REALLY does not want them to make up. I wonder why…
teecee-i couldn’t agree more. it’s so obvious and it has been since season 3 ep. 1
Actually, if I never had to see one of Teresa’s discontent, undisciplined children again, I would not be sad. Maybe it is because I can see in them the blueprint for turning out like their discontent, malicious mother. Scum is a perfect word for Teresa’s character, but I can see why the word so offended she and her husband. The truth always seems to rankle them.
They are KIDS! Leave them alone. They can’t possibly turn out any worse than Ashlee or Melissa so maybe you should think before you speak about little children. Have some respect
Hating on a bunch of six year olds is a bit much.
There’s an easy way to not see them. Don’t watch the show. Cher really seems like the kind of person who sits at home using human skins and making a Melissa bodysuit and mask. It puts the olive oil on its skin….
Her children are horrible with those screeching voices. None of them have an ounce of manners and all I can say is she is gong to have her hands full when they all hit puberty.
If I were Melissa I would not want them to make up either. You can only take so much before you become sour and say to hell with that b. Melissa is sour this year but to be honest just because it is a new season on TV does not mean hurt feeling just disappear like magic. Theresa seemed genuine upset but she also needs to own some of her past behavior and move on instead of being involved when hens are clucking over her sister in law. If she wants peace stand up for the girl and tell those other broads to keep it moving with out her name being attached to the b.s. Family is family unless family is just a bunch of people you happen to be related to and then shut up about it. Loyalty goes both ways. Theresa needs to be loyal to her brother and she needs to remember that that is his wife and the mother of his children. No one is a kid anymore and no man is going to ever allow his sister to bad mouth the woman he married and sleeps next to every night. Even if Theresa thinks Melissa is a witch stay out of it and be cordial. Prove that you have class and you don’t have some creepy jealous thing going on with your brother’s wife. It is too weird.
What exactly has Teresa (notice the spelling and how east it is) done to Melissa? For what is she supposed to apologize?
Meanwhile I’ve seen Melissa pile in with her nasty sisters on twitter mocking Teresa. Maybe she needs to apologize. And stop blocking the gorga sibs from each other.
Bet you a nickel that Melissa is long gone in a few years. Gorga no morga.
Theresa or Teresa.. If I were Melissa, which T.G. I am not, I would be the sister in law from hell after I found out Theresa/Teresa/Tracy/Terri said so many things about me. I would not call her the devil, I would be the devil. Then again my nick name is Wicked and my all my sister in laws step nicely to me and I stay out of my brother’s personal relationships.
Iwicked and Cher I’m with the two of you– minority but still.
Teresa is scum. See YOU NEXT TUESDAY
There have been discussions speculating that Joe Gorga is on steroids as a partial explanation for his emotional rages, change in his body mass from one season to the next & even hair loss. His decision to shave his head has also been cited as a common practice with men who are losing their hair. Since the beginning he has always loved his caps.
I really think Joe Gorga suffers from roid rage.
Yep I agree about the roid rage.
Just look at the size of Gorga’s neck. When I saw him without his shirt, I thought of a weeble wobble, except he falls down.
I think there is plenty of roids to go around. I think it may be one of the many things the Joe’s have in common.
I agree LMV ^^^
If anything I think Guidice is also roided
Melissa is very controlling. This reminds me of the last episode last season when she told Joey to call Teresa a name when they were driving off. She’s lame!
Manhattan or New England clam chowda??
I love chowder. I’m on a personal mission and I’ve almost tried every chowder in the Seattle tri county area.
My money was always on Juicy in the fight, Joe Gorga is scrappy but doesn’t have the meat that Joe G. has. The moment where Melissa came running with the hat was hilarious. I don’t really know what Melissa expected Teresa to do. I’d walk away too. I don’t think it’s any woman’s responsibility to ever break up a fight and they always look foolish doing it. I agree it’s emasculating. The last season of Jersey Shore Jenni tried to break up a fight that Roger got into and he ended up knocking her over. They got into a big thing about how he supposedly beat her. I’ve seen things like that happen in my own life too and it just looks dumb on all sides. You can find me at the bar if my moron boyfriend ever finds himself in a fight.
Other thoughts:
It was funny when Joe Gorga admitted that he wears the black spray. At least he admitted it. I’ll give him a few points for that.
Juicy is getting great edit this season. The scene in the tub was kinda cute I guess.
I don’t know who Dr V. is. She was on Shahs also, no? With MJ and her mom? She’s a little weird. But I think she’s better for this awful family.
They might have at least added some bubbles so the poor waiter did not have to gander Joe Guidices dinosaur body and Teresa’s man/woman form. So funny how they are scripting their marriage this year after the last three in which we saw Joe Guidice throw up in his mouth a little every time Teresa touched him. The realest moment of their relationship was tonight when he had his wife next to him but preferred her getting out while he stayed in and jerked off a few times. Maybe he had a picture of his girlfriend in the nightstand.
LOL!
Jesus Cher. You are not fucking funny and just to spectacularly redundant and boring. Comment after comment. Why do you take all this so very personally? And how’s your body looking? I’m betting there are not enough bubbles in the world.
LOL Cher, are you Melissa or Joe Gorga? I had to go back and read these comments to see what teecee was talking about!
Cher is our resident moron. She spends a lot of time here when she is not bagging groceries at Mexican Publix.
Cher? Were you there when Joe “jerked off a few times?” How do you know this?
You need help Cher. Maybe you could ask Dr V to help you?
It made me chuckle.
When Joe said that I almost fell out of my chair laughing. Talk about the blunt honest truth about their marriage.
EXACTLY!!! On point Cher*****
Oh my god I feel so weird because I agree with Cher!
Please everyone, I’m not cra-cra!
And I have a waist and my legs are not thick so yeah I like my own body as opposed to Teresa’s. lol!
I could have totally done without that bathroom scene! I thought Lauren’s line about them getting her mother up there to kill her was hilarous.
The funniest thing about the midget thing is not the edit, but the Joe Guidice continues to call Joe Gorga that when a couple of seasons ago we all watched them go back to back to be measured, and they are the exact same height. I try to avoid the unpolitically correct word of retard because it is not nice, but the Guidices are the biggest retards ever depicted on television.
Complete retards.
Gorga was wearing shoe lifts, lol!
Thanks Bravo for making me like Juicy Joe this season! I think he could have pummeled Gorga if he wanted to. I never thought about Joe Gorga having roid rage but that makes a lot of sense. Melissa is really annoying….she definitely doesn’t want him to make up with Tre and seems like she’s trying to isolate him from his family. For christ’s sake, when is Melissa going to get over the stripper shit? WHO CARES! If she wasn’t then what does she have to worry about? The tub scene with Juicy and Tre was weird.
Tre believed that Melissa should have stopped the fight while she ran off to “call the police” …LOL at Lil JoGo’s black hair spray all over the place
Yes, and then she came back in and broke up the fight! What a world Tre lives in.
Strangely, Melissa kept asking Tre, why didn’t you try to help your brother. It was as though Tre’s husband wasn’t involved. I’m sure she was confused because she loves them both and didn’t want to get hit.
I saw Poison the ball biter charge Juicy, why would Tre help her brother???
It was so sad to see this fight come to blows. I’ve read Teresa’s blog and she still says she doesn’t talk about Melissa. Caroline and Jacqueline confirmed that before they met Melissa, Teresa told them she was a golddigger and a stripper. Teresa OWN IT ALREADY! Do you expect the public to not see your daughters calling their aunt a stripper and believe that you never said that? Stop insulting us! The bottom line is no one would be good enough for your brother in your eyes. I believe that for years you talked about Melissa behind her back. Admit, Apologize and move on already! I’m not a Melissa fan either. Its very clear to me that Melissa doesn’t want her brother to make-up with his sister and I can’t say for certain if I were in her shoes that I wouldn’t feel the same way. I thought it way HILARIOUS when Joe Gorga talked about his spray on hair. Laughed my buns off. I so did not need to see the Guidice’s in the bathtub. Who gets room service while naked in a tub anyway? Trashy! That poor guy! Yikes!
True dat!
actually, I remember Jacqueline saying that she knew very little about Melissa and Joe beyond what they saw of them at Teresa’s parties, which they were always at. She said in a talking head or blog once that she was completely unaware of any friction in the relationship until Melissa joined the show. Then I’m SURE that Teresa told them that there were RUMORS about Melissa, but couldn’t have said she was a stripper or anything else because Teresa still has no idea if the RUMORS were/are true.
I’m betting that Caroline and Jac are now finding out that whatever Teresa told them about Melissa-it was the TRUTH.
You know Caroline sees now what Melissa really is. She isn’t my fave but she’s not dumb, she sees Melissa acting snotty and not wanting even her (Caroline) to help.
The thing is, Melissa IS a golddigger and former stripper. Teresa saw her comin a mile away and knew this girl was nuthin but trouble, and she was right.
I agree with you NYC…
You guys are hilarious. thanks for the much-needed laugh today.
My two cents: Melissa’s need to control her husband and the dynamics of his relationship with his family is pathological. A happily married woman does not behave this way. She is seriously insecure–I’m not saying she is jealous of Teresa so please don’t jump on me–I’m saying she has forged this completely irrational assumption in her head that if her husband has a close, loving relationship with his sister/family, it will take away from her marriage and relationship with him. This was glaringly confirmed for me when she revealed her deep abandonment issues in regards to her father regularly leaving her family for another woman/women and his eventual sudden death. It was also clear to me when she brags about knowing how to “keep a man” and claims she knows all the tricks to “keeping” a guy. The way she talks about men and her concept of a marriage is in a possessive, anxiously insecure way. If your husband loves you and his kids and wants the marriage to work he’s not going to throw you over for his nutso sister or love you any less because she makes snide remarks now and then. Melissa needs to grow up, take responsibility for her crazy and get some therapy.
It seems that one of her main focuses in life and in her marriage is to prevent her husband from having any close outside relationships, including with his family. She was even upset and jealous when J.G. went to dinner/lunch with Caroline (an older lady and former long-time friend of his sister) to talk about his sister, and SHE wasn’t invited. Is she serious? It’s clear that she’s perfectly happy when her husband is enraged at his sister and his family and is completely isolated from them–she has him all to herself. Her blog was all about being a “mama bear” and mother hen–very telling…. Melissa thinks she can replace her husband’s mother and play that role in his life for him. She truly believes she is being a good wife by fighting his battles for him or by stoking the fires of his petty childhood competitions with his sister, thus enabling his insecurities and making him more vulnerable to her manipulations.
It really brought the rages in me to see her playing the wanton victim, frenetically poisoning and manipulating her husband’s mind, relentlessly bashing his sister, and frantically attempting to bar them from speaking to each other, all while desperately pleading that they leave before things could get worked out. This is not a woman who wants her husband to make up with his family, regardless of the hot air that comes out of her mouth.
I think Teresa is crazy, petty, delusional, you name it… but I do believe she is more justified in this situation. I think her slighting Melissa for years is wrong, but she has known and grown up with her brother for years and it seems that she really felt like she was doing this in his best interest–she had no allegiance to Melissa at that point and doesn’t owe her anything. Melissa, on the other hand, has been driving a wedge between her husband and the family he’s known and has loved him for years–and she DOES owe them respect, as his parents and his family. I get that crazy, suspicious, and rude in-laws can be EXTREMELY frustrating. But if Melissa spent these ten years being kind and polite to her husband’s family instead of undermining them, she certainly could have proved her loyalty and her character to them by now. Sometimes you just have to swallow your pride and suck it up with in-laws in order to prevent constant all-out wars among the family. There is just no way anyone can try to say that Melissa has been a hapless, innocent victim of abuse for ten years. Her personality is way too pathological, domineering, and competitive for me to ever believe that–I don’t buy her victim act for a second and I feel for anyone who does– she truly has helped destroy her husband’s family and it’s very telling that her husband’s parents want nothing to do with her. Ugh I can’t believe I care about these people enough to hate them so much…Sorry for the rant.
VERY well thought out and interesting comment! You have a much more sympathetic view of Melissa than I do, but it makes a lot of sense…
Oh I am not sympathetic to her at all! I despise her and I feel like every time she’s onscreen she’s putting on an act and insulting our intelligence. I think she’s smart enough to see and know that she is a major force in causing chaos and dysfunction in her family, and that her husband’s estrangement from his family and being torn between the two sides is causing him much pain and anguish. To me, she’s completely selfish in that she won’t own up to contributing to the problem and acknowledge that she has some serious issues she needs to work on and seek help. She has no excuse for not having done that years ago–nothing will change if she can’t fix herself and her twisted perception of things first. And thanks!
I think you make some interesting points. I am in no way a big fan of Melissa’s, but more of an anti-fan of Teresa’s. I think she also drives a wedge in the family and does in fact have her parents ear. I am so sick of her “I don’t talk about them to my parents” Yeah right! Maybe she gets other people to come over and talk about Melissa in front of them. That seems to me her MO.
I’m waiting for Joe Guidice or Kathy for that matter, to tell Richie to STFU. Richie is an instigator and is forever complaining about Teresa. So far, he’s been careful not to do it while Joe is around, but, eventually it’ll back to him.
*It will get back to Joe Guidice.
IRichie doesn;t boither me like he does a lot of people. I think he is just fed up with the way Teresa treats his wife. She is very unkind to her and I think Kathy is very sweet. He is just taking up for her. Unfortuantely he is not very articulate. I think he is kind of funny.
Obviously I am not very articulate either judging from all the typos! Never type in the dark kids!
I am not one to comment on anyones physical appearance but I just have to say….Teresa’s hair at this retreat looks like straw. Every time she touches it I can hear it crunch through my TV. Hair care products really? And don’t get me started on the princess Leia hairdo in the bathtub.
I haven’t watched NJ in a couple of seasons – when they introduced Teresa’s family, I was instantly turned off!!! JG is the one I would turn and walk the other direction if I heard him clear his voice. And Melissa…..I wouldn’t know where to start in describing her. As if Caroline Manzo wasn’t enough with the twisted advice — one person can’t be right about everything and have a solution for everything.