Anna Nicole, Lifetime’s latest original movie about the life of Anna Nicole Smith is one hot mess, just like the woman herself. And also like Anna, you just can’t turn away from this movie. Though there were parts of the movie, especially the scenes about her childhood that made me want to close my eyes. Thankfully it started to get ridiculous right away with little Vicki Lynn talking to hallucinations named Anna Nicole. Dear writers, there will be plenty of hallucinogenic years to come for Anna. Why invent some from when she was six? It got more campy and ridiculous every time you did it.
“I told you not to marry the fry cook at Krispy Karl’s Fried Chicken.” Now that right there is some Lifetime dialogue worthy of notice.
The female plastic surgeon asking her if she wants peaches, grapefruits or melons and then having Anna take out a bowling ball bag as an example has now taken us fully into the land of make-believe. She got melons, in the movie by the way.
Hilarious story line about her sugardaddy being dragged by force into the strip club when he really wanted to go to the country club.
“I don’t want to be taken care of.” ~Anna Nicole line in the movie just before moving in with her sugardaddy.
So the director (Mary Harron, Director of American Psycho, Big Love, Six Feet Under and the L Word) thinks snorting lines of coke while speeding in a car with the top down is possible? Okay then. Clearly she did not fully embrace the 1980s. Or she is just fucking with us. She has an Oxford education is an acclaimed director and is directing a Lifetime movie. I think she is just screwing with the huddled mass yearning to break free of Lifetime movies but too seriously addicted to do so. I’m on to you, Mary Harron. And yes, I get it, you got Martin Landau. So did BAPS.
More humorous writing liberties. Anna Nicole was nervous about taking it all off for Playboy. /giggles
Not so humorous the son having his father sign paperwork he was unable to read. I had two siblings out of five do that to my father when he was in rough shape.
Please tell me that this Amazing Grace scene is fiction.
The hallucination thing is really disturbing and annoying. And probably great directing or something among the film critic elite. For me it is just creepy.
Is it true she was diagnosed with Borderline Personality?
Although not dead ringers exactly, I knew Howard Stern and Larry Birkhead from their first seconds of their scenes.
I can’t believe they left out the clown face scene. Oh there it is. I didn’t recall her being pregnant during that. She was worse than Kim Biermann smoking while knocked up.
What’s the deal with the flashback to them playing in autumn leaves when he was a kid, and then suddenly she is dressed in winter clothes in the Bahamas or Bimini or wherever all this happened with the same leaves? Is this some fancypants director’s way of making it another of Anna’s hallucinations? Darling, this is Lifetime. We are not looking for subtle undertones and thematic bullshit. We are a bunch of old fat chicks watching some crappy tabloid shit made into and even worse movie. AND WE LIKE IT. Stop trying to cultivate us.