It’s time for episode two of this season’s Real Housewives of New Jersey. Who will be the biggest spectacle tonight? We start with Tre’s kids who I LOVE to watch. I could just sit and watch them all day. They are all a hot mess. Milania is 6 and cooking on the stove (with minor “supervision” from Tre) Gia is mocking her and one of the better behaved girls is just sort of sitting back watching the show. Tre tells the girls a little story about how in the olden days, she was expected to act like a human and behave in a civilized manner at the dinner table. The kids are rightly confused by this entire story. I would fully expect one of them to ask what “manners” are but I don’t see them as listening that intently. They are mostly busy back talking. Meanwhile, while making cards for their grandfather who is about to have a pacemaker put it in, Milania points out that if his heart stops beating he will die. Tre looks shocked by this bit of medical knowledge, and Gia is visibly upset.
Meanwhile, Joe and Melissa are having trouble getting any nibbles on their house. They have been trying to sell it off and on since 2009. You can find everything there is to know about their main house and their shore house here. Their statements to the press at the time this was being filmed was that they wanted to move back to Franklin Lakes “for the schools.” I assumed at that time they meant a better school district, but this could actually be to get away from Tre. These storylines usually don’t have this much basis in fact. Looks like this could be one of the times it is a true story. Both Melissa and Tre had their homes on the Top Ten Ugliest McMansions in New Jersey List. So it’s not like they have nothing at all in common. Later, during an open house, the showing agent manages to break the vanity in the bathroom. It looks like marble but apparently, it’s wood. She tells the client, “It’s not even real. It’s phony, I wonder what else in the house is phony, editing cuts to Melissa.” Like I said LAST season, this will be Melissa’s turn to be the victimized cast member with the bad editing. Turns out the realtor, Jennifer, is friends with Teresa.
Caroline’s sister Fran got divorced and moved in with Caroline. Fran has a fugly dog named Frito. Apparently, he smells like Fritos. Caroline is her usual bitchy self with Lauren. Caroline and Albert still have their get away apartment in Hoboken or wherever to escape the freeloaders. Caroline tells Albert that she is going to try to mediate Tre’s relationship with her brother again. Albert could care less.
Kathy is teaching her son Joesph how to drive. Why isn’t Rich doing this? Oh he is in the backseat. Rich is not helping and being quite inappropriate. Later they visit Victoria at her college where she is studying to be a nurse practitioner. Again Rich is being inappropriate.
It’s Jacqueline and …I can’t. Sorry.
Tre films a scene with Kim D outside the hospital. I am going to assume that is due to her not wanting to leave, which is kind of sweet. Tre is going to lunch expecting an apology from Caroline. That would be nice but I don’t think Tre should hold her breath. I am not even going to go there with what Tre just said about red wine and menstrual blood. At the restaurant, things start out civilly. Tre points out that Caroline should fix her own sibling relationship and leave her to deal with hers. Caroline interprets that as Tre deflecting her issues onto Caroline. Um, no mam, Caroline. Neither one of you have any business counseling the other on sibling relationships. Even Tre can comprehend that. Caroline wants to know why Tre would be friends with Kim D. Again, Tre has a good point, after what Jac did to Tre, why does her brother hang out with Jacqueline. This is like the blind leading the blind. Or the dumb leading the dumb. Caroline is defending Jacqueline. I think Jacqueline is more responsible for Melissa situation and setting up Tre than Kim D. Eventually, Teresa agrees to meet Joe half way. Things went well. Somehow, Tre came off looking better than Caroline.