Okay, this is a strange show. It’s a one on one with all of the Real Housewives of New Jersey. Only it’s not sequential, or all together, it’s them each talking to Andy about a subject and then the answers are sort of interspersed with each other. It’s two or more sides to a story, and then suddenly there is a new topic, more flip-flopping between interested parties and some video footage in between. It’s rather frantic and disjointed, so this blog will be as well. It’s not exactly a blow-by-blow but it is pretty detailed. I hope it makes sense.
Andy starts with Kathy and asks about growing up with Teresa and Joe as cousins. She said she is older than they are and to her (and Rosie) they were just like little dolls. Teresa was just like Milania. Then, they show that part of Tre’s interview and she says there were long periods of times they did not speak (the two families, I assume). They started speaking again about the time Tre turned 16.
Andy to Caroline do you remember meeting Teresa? She says Dina worked at the same mall with Tre and they sold makeup. Caroline said Tre was fun and vivacious but she was older and they didn’t interact much. Now back to the Tre interview. Tre says Caroline was Dina’s older sister and she respected her but they did not hang out. We didn’t really hang out until the show.
Andy asks Jacqueline what Tre was like 12 years ago when they first met. Jac says Tre was fun and she made her laugh all the time. He asks her about meeting Caroline. She said Caroline was great she let me live in her house for six months. Flash to Caroline, same question. She says Jac did not get them at first, it took her a long time to blend in with the pack, but she fits right in now.
Did you know Melissa and Kathy before the show? Caroline says she had seen Melissa in passing with Tre. She said she had heard some bad things about Melissa so she had a wall up with her. Jac says she saw Melissa at a couple of functions but she knew not to get to close to her because she knew how Tre felt about her. Caroline never knew Kathy existed. Melissa’s hair is very light and looks good. Melissa says Caroline is the type not to like you until she likes you, but she did seem to like Joe instantly. Melissa says she met Tre for the first time at her MIL’s house when she went to dinner for the first time. Cut to Tre telling how she welcomed her to this dinner with open arms. Melissa says Tre was nice to her and asked a lot of questions.
Suddenly, we are back with Caroline and Andy asks her favorite moment of all the seasons and she says “When Albie was dismissed from law school.” That’s kind of random. It taught Albie that he was not alone because he got lots of letters of support. Melissa says she has lots of favorite moments she like to watch, she liked watching the California trip. Watching herself screaming because tadpoles were on her feet. Jac says being silly with Teresa, and going to Italy. Tre says being a New York Times Bestselling Author. And someone finally taught her how to say it. And talks about the table flip. Jac says she felt sucked into that scene. Cut to scene showing it was all Jac getting crazy. Andy brings up Tre pushing him at the reunion.
Back to Melissa, when did things start going badly between you. She says it was before the show right after Antonia was born. She noticed Tre saying thing that were rude, but in a way she was not sure she meant it that way. Tre says she is the kind that if she has something to say to you, she will say it and then for her it is over. But Melissa and Joe hold grudges and don’t get over situations. Andy implies that Tre doesn’t let go of anything either. He brings up #ChristmasCookieGate2010 They rehash the whole thing, I will spare you. But Tre says she wasn’t saying it to be mean, she was saying it so next year she would not bring (cheap, ShopRite) sprinkle cookies. Tre says that Melissa wrote On Display about her.
Back to Jac, when did things go wrong for you and Tre? Jac says that Tre told her she was giving interviews and some were true and some were not and she was worried about Tre. Tre says the Tre going to jail story did not even come from her and that Jac just brought it up to be relevant to the show. Jac said in response, we all have storyline and we all get paid the same so I don’t see how asking if she was okay was a benefit to me. She was the one filming about it on the show, so I asked! Tre says that was their very first fight.
Andy tell Caroline some fans were angry with her for predicting Tre would get a divorce. Caroline says she did not predict a divorce, she said that if Tre got divorced she would capitalize on it, she would write a book and she was right because two weeks later Tre put out a magazine article about it. Caroline feels like nothing is sacred with Teresa. She will sell anything for a buck.
Kathy talks about the Napa trip and how things went wrong. The conversation in the hot tub heard around the world. Tre says Caroline betrayed her on that trip. Caroline says that she realized Tre was not the person she thought she was. Melissa was not involved in that fight, Andy points out, to Melissa. Melissa said she was in a good place with Tre at the time and left with her. Caroline said “these trips are torture.” Andy asks about the infamous Joe phone call at the vineyard. Caroline said she cried when she watched the episode and felt awful for Tre and wished she could have called her. Melissa said the same thing. She cried and felt awful for her despite the fact that by the time she saw it they were in a bad place again. Jac said she felt bad and she sent her a text after the show aired to let her know it was not something she was enjoying. Which of course means Jac was evilly cackling between each push of the butt. Kathy said she felt bad for her, and that no wife wants to hear that about herself. Teresa puts on her pageant smile and says it wasn’t hard for her because it was on TV and she swears to Andy that her husband never calls her “the c word.” Andy asks how did it feel when he did? Tre says well he didn’t say it to me. Andy says, he said it ABOUT you. Tre says, yeah he said it on the phone, to his driver, I know that is who it was. Oh Tre, you know you don’t believe that. She goes on to say there have been plenty of times she has called him a name to her friends. It was nothing. Andy asks Melissa if she believed the call was from his driver. She says that is a line she is not going to cross. She will not talk about someone else’s marriage. Andy tells Teresa that after the show aired, Joe had a costly amount of making up to do. And Teresa then admits she was upset.
Moving on to the Poshe fashion show. Andy asks Teresa if she was surprised by who implicated her in the Melissa set up. AND TERESA KNOWS THE WORD IMPLICATED! I am stunned for a moment. She says that it was Jacqueline that implicated her and that shocked her. I paused on Jac just before she tells Andy that she does still believed Tre was involved with setting up Melissa and she had the liars half smile on her face before getting the proper expression. Kathy also says that she thinks Tre knew something was going to happen. Melissa said she thinks it was a group of people, the people who owned the salon, Kim D and that Teresa knew about it. Tre says all the RHONJ knew something was going to go down, but they didn’t know what. I still believe Tre. Caroline says that the truth is going to come out and she is going to reserve comment for now because it is only going to get me in trouble.
Andy says that Jacqueline looks a little tweaked. That term means something entirely different here in the ghetto, but he is asking about plastic surgery. Jac says she had a tummy tuck and a neck lift. Speaking of how they all look, everyone looks great. Not much of anything to poke fun at. Jacqueline is dressed very…demurely, and Kathy has on too much makeup, but other than that. Everyone looks great.
Melissa says watching the reunion makes you relive it, and it stirs up negativity. Melissa wishes people would argue their points but not try to harm each other with personal attacks, like “you can’t sing.” Melissa hates that people try to ruin each other’s images. Kathy feels bad for talking about Tre’s dad but was beyond angry when Tre talked about her deceased father. Blubber. Pageant dress. Rehash.
Andy asks how much of a storyline is Nick’s autism. Cut to sneak peek of Jac with Nick and the whole autism storyline. I may have to just mute those scenes, I had how Jac makes it seem like a death sentence. It’s not leprosy. I get a parent wanting their child’s path through life to be as smooth as possible but I have taught kids on every end of the autism spectrum, and they are delightful learners. The parents can be assholes, but the kid are great. She is going to show us what parents with a child who has autism go through, she tells Andy. No, Jac, you are going to show us how narcissistic attention whores react to the news that their child requires special attention. I’ve never met a parent of an autistic child who tweets all day. They really don’t have the time. The storyline is how Nick’s development affects Jac.
Kathy says Rosie is on the season a lot. Rosie is making everyone happy this season. Andy asks Melissa about the recent headlines about someone from her past and infidelities… Melissa deflects. Wow. That was the most telling thing on the show. Andy asks about some explosive brawls this season. Clips of the two Joes going at each other at the retreat. Andy asks Tre if she dreads the brawls coming up. Does it embarrass her? And she says yes. Tre says there are two brawls (the retreat one and Stilettogate ) and one will embarrass her. That would be the retreat, she didn’t get blood on her hands (literally!) at Stilettogate. That was all Jac.
The season opens with Hurricane Sandy. Wow, Tre’s shore home is TRASHED. Caroline Manzo and her family did A LOT of charity work during that time. I know others did too, but the Manzos went above and beyond, and that includes Jac. Wow, Melissa’s shore how is a disaster too. I mean overturned furniture, missing walls. It’s bad.
Andy hints about the retreat they went on for therapy near the beginning at the show.
In talking about season five Caroline says Tre is an enigma. She wants to hate her but she just can’t. Melissa says Tre is her family and she wants things to work. Andy asks Caroline for a one word description of Season Five. She says “unpredictable” Jac says “it goes full circle” and Kathy says “expect the unexpected” Tre says it is a rollercoaster but fun Teresa is back.
Andy does word association.
He says “Teresa” Jac says “competitive“, Melissa says “defensive“, Kathy says, “spicy”
He says “Jacqueline” Kathy says “sweet” Caroline says “goofy” Melissa says “mediator” Teresa sighs deeply, looks down and says… he doesn’t show it.
He says, “Melissa” Jac says “sexy” Tre sighs and looks down saying nothing. Kathy says “fun” Caroline says “sassy.”
He says Caroline Teresa says Caroline….drifts…Andy says you are taking too long, we get to answer. Melissa says “Matriach,” Kathy says “strong”
Andy says “Kathy”: Caroline says “Fun” Melissa says “caring” And once again, Teresa can’t do word association because she hasn’t rehearsed her answers.
Andy says “Joe Gorga!” Trying to get Tre to participate. She says “Love him, my brother.” Melissa “Love him” Caroline “sunshine” Jac “full of sex….I mean horny!”
Teresa so could not do the word association. She asks Andy what he would say about her and he says he would say tabletop. She says she doesn’t like that. He says he would say Fabellini and she says she would like that better.