Wow. Between the Jodi Arias trial and all the new posts to moderate today and the terrible attacks on Boston, I’m a bit burnt out and blogging about a frivolous housewives seems a bit out of place, but here we go. We start with Alexis visiting baby Troy. Vicki is going to be called Nana by the baby. Alexis asks about Brooks. Vicki says she has not seen him in 6 weeks. Briana smirks as if that is not true. Lots of tension between Briana and Vicki about Brooks. Briana says that she will move out if Brooks is allowed in the house she pays rent in. I’d kick her ass out if I was Vicki. Renters or not, you don’t give a roommate, let alone your mother an ultimatum on who she can date. Kids today!
Gretchen is looking for a baby gift, I assume for Vicki’s grandson with Tamra. Tamra has Gretchen try on a baby carrier and puts a doll in it. They are terrorizing the store and the cashier seems a bit appalled.
Adrienne is visiting Paul Heather is visiting Terry at the his office. Heather has been invited by the new girl Lydia to do a feature in the magazine. Terry says if we are not going to be on the cover, why do it. Really Terry? It’s Lydia’s first scene on the housewives. She arrives at Heather’s house to see it for the magazine. Heather’s house is beautiful. Heather makes it clear to she is only interested in a cover. Lydia basically says she will pass that request along to her husband who makes those sorts of decisions. Then Lydia mentions that she used to be Alexis’ neighbor and that they are friendly and still speak on occasion. Heather compliment’s Lydia’s GIGANTIC diamond ring. Lydia thanks her and says that it’s not her real one, because it is at the jeweler. This sends Heather into gossip mode and she shares with Lydia that Alexis wears a fake ring and keeps her real one in the safety deposit box. Lydia wonders why anyone would do that. She says she is friends with the jeweler so she was able to borrow one while hers is being cleaned or whatever.
Lydia has a beautiful house and two boys. Is this a good time to mention her teeth? I am trying not to be one of those people who mocks people’s looks but…this girl too many teeth for her mouth or something. It is very distracting. She’s very pretentious and her talking head is all about how rich they are but how they try to let their kids know that everyone else is a lot poorer than they are. They are starting to sound like the reason they are friendly with Alexis is because they are religious fanatics. She has had 47 times that they are very well off. She expects everything to go her way. She is very rich and lives the good life. I know this because this is all that she keeps saying in a variety of ways. Lydia’s very rich husband says Heather is not important enough for the cover.
Tamra is working on her new fitness center. Tamra is planning to meet Vicki there and show her the studio. Eddie calls and gets all up in the koolaid like a little girl. Vicki immediately asks about the insurance policy. They don’t have one yet. Vicki and Tamra go to lunch to try to make-up. Tamra says that they were like sisters. They are bringing up all the old stuff. Tamra feels like Vicki is taking things out on her for Briana not liking Brooks. She doesn’t say that to Vicki. She says it in a talking head. Tamra also says in her talking head that when Brooks turns on her or hurts her she will be there in the end. Apologies happen all around and they toast to a better future or something. Pretend I said something funny here, because I’m not feeling the usual snarky funny.
Heather is lecturing Terry about missing family time when he works out at the gym. Heather doesn’t seem to get the obvious that Terry needs time away for a nagging wife and four kids. Terry just said that he doesn’t do the “mommy jobs.” The whole family is off to Temple for Yom Kippur. The youngest child, Colette, is acting up in temple. Terry has to take her out. Terry suggests to Collette that they break the fast with a cocktail. Terry lets her escape back into the service and Heather has to take her out again. She bitches about Terry in her talking head. I’d like to point out that this is their FOURTH child. Shouldn’t she be used to his parenting or lack thereof by now?
Tamra is planning a dinner party (say it with me, “Oh Gawd!”) at the fitness studio for all the girls. Vicki invites Alexis. (“Oh GAWWWWD!”) Things are about to get more exciting. Next week it looks like Tamra physically throws Alexis from her party.