Big Rich Atlanta Recap: Broke Down Baby Girls

Yes, I am still watching Big Rich Atlanta! This week, Ashlee is back. Interesting that her first line is “I am back in this town and I am dropping grenades.”  One of her “very dear friends” commented on a previous BRA post that Ashlee is in fact from Atlanta. Not true. She is from Valdosta or Vidalia or I forget which below the gnat line town. At any rate, she’s back to further humiliate herself on national TV and that is fantastic! She has so much weave glued to her head she is going to have neck injuries. Ashlee calls Anandi’s mamma, the dancing preacher a hussy (but not to her face, basically after she gets told off and Anandi’s mamma drops her out of Ashlee’s “pageant program”). Anandi goes behind her mother’s back to re-enroll in the program. Anandi is an idiot.

Harvin convinces Meyer to go through their mother’s bedroom. She seems to have a lot of sex toys. They manage to spill a blue drink on the bed spread while snooping. Meanwhile their mother is going out with some cub she picked up at Johnny’s Hideaway. You have to be from Atlanta to know how hysterical it this is. Even funnier, mom wants to fix him up with Meyer. He doesn’t seem excited by this suggestion but Mom forges ahead with the plan. Meyer and Harvin already know that Mike is from Johnny’s Hideaway lol. Meyer is so not interested. Later in a flashback scene, it’s clear that Virginia was Mike’s second or third choice from the mothers. I am betting she slept with him. Virginia wants a G-Shot to stimulate her…G-spot. This is why I basically ignore the mamma drama scenes.

Megan’s mom is having a Halloween and Birthday party and her mother wants her to go as either a bottle of ketchup, the jolly green giant or a giant pumpkin. Meagan is going to borrow a unicorn costume from Harvin and Meyer. Everyone is coming for the party which means someone will brawl! YAY! Marcia tries to talk to Sharlinda to tell her that Virginia, Harvin and Meyer will be at the party. Marcia is worried about physical violence at the party. Ya think?

Finally, it’s party time! OMG! Harvin and Meyer are broken dolls and they are in a double child’s stroller with Virginia pushing them. Virgina leaves them outside and they are hysterical. I MUST find a picture. Harvin and Meyer go out to talk to Sharlinda and Khadijhia and it doesn’t go well. No apologies are offered. But everyone keeps their hands to themselves.

Virginia lamely attempts to hook Mike up with Meyer and then leaves with him to try out her new G-shot. I mean that shot had to be expensive, no need for it to go to waste. Meanwhile, Harvin and Meyer climb out a window and jump into the bushes. Why? Mostly because they are drunk. It was awesome.