I have to just accept that I watch Vanderpump Rules and am sort of into it. There I said it. I am still pissed I never saw the Stassi getting dumped scene last week. I must catch that! Now on with the show!
Jax and LL are going to sweat in a special extra healthy heat. It sure looks like a regular old sauna to me. Jax has to get out and so LL follows him muttering “I should not have taken my prozac this morning” over and over. That’s practically the mating call of the crazy woman. She feels terrible after ten minutes despite swearing that after an hour sauna she feels like she has had the best orgasm ever. Um, you aren’t supposed to stay in there that long, dumbass. Jax goes back in alone and they talk through the glass door. Jax says, “Is this what it is like when you go talk to your Dad?” You see our prozac taking (NTTAWWT) LL’s father is in prison. Oh and we also know that LL is a former heroin addict with like six months or less clean. Can you smell what the Rock is cooking here? LL has the night off and she wants to stay at Jax place and watch TV while he is working. Why? Does she live in a cardboard box down by the bridge?
Meanwhile, in Stassiville, one of the minions came over and Stassi has a tiny new puppy. She informs the minion that “Frank and I broke up.” Which is how you tell your friends he dumped you in dramatic fashion. Stassi says she is great with being alone for a while. I give her two days. Stassi and Scheana and a minion are at the pool. Stassi is wearing a huge (and lovely) statement piece necklace with her bikini. Fashion Foul! She’s also laying around the pool drinking tequila instead of writing her blog post for Pandora. When Pandora call’s she doesn’t answer because she knows she is going to be mad and she is doing everything she can to get the piece written! heh. Later, Pandora shows up at her mum’s and complains about Stassi saying she has not turned in her assignments in two months. Lisa and Pandora confront Stassi and she cries.
Oh lord, back with LL and Jax and she relapsed and is clean for only six days. Jax is worried about leaving her alone with his bar. Oh, come on Jax. You are over thinking this. A drunk alone with a full bar? What could possibly happen? In their next scene LL is at a NA/AA meeting and Jax come in to support her. She talks about her extensive meth use and how she would rob her parents for drug money. Jax immediately tries to distance himself from her and she freaks out. Jax tries the whole “I want to be able to miss you!” line. He’s about a day from totally breaking up with her. Jax and Stassi reunion before the week ends.
Jax and the Toms had a workout. One Tom said to the other Tom that he asked Jax how he bags so many hot chicks and Jax said that the just tells them what they want to hear. Later, at SUR, Jax tells Stassi what she wants to hear. It works. Oooh this will not sit well with LL who already had a sit down with Stassi earlier where Stassi mocked her by saying Jax texts her all the time saying he misses her. LL comes to Jax demanding to know why he isn’t calling or texting with her. She demands an explanation! LL is now telling the customers that he is a horrible person who dumped her for no reason. That was a pretty good relationship fight. Next week is the finale and Jax and Stassi have a crying argument again. I’m in!
Come on, I know some of you are watching! It really doesn’t suck! much.