Tamara Tattles

Come for the tea. Stay for the shade.

  • COMMENTING RULES!
  • Blinds
  • RHOA
  • RHOBH
  • RHOD
  • RHONY
  • RHONJ
  • RHOOC
  • RHOP
  • RHOSLC
  • Shahs of Sunset
  • Pump Rules
  • Southern Charm
  • Below Deck
  • MDLLA
  • WWHL
  • Killing Eve
  • Open Forum
  • MAFS
  • 90 Day
  • Love After Lockup
  • FT
You are here: Home / RHOM / Filming Real Housewives of Miami / Real Drunken Thoughts About Real Housewives of Miami

Real Drunken Thoughts About Real Housewives of Miami

October 4, 2012 by tamaratattles 4 Comments

I may be on the fence about Adriana and only leaning toward liking her because she bitch slaps Joanna later on in the season but J’adore Frederic. I want to do slutty things with him. He’s french AND he has sailboat? Mon Dieu.

Joanna’s mark boyfriend seems unhappy with her. She better fix this or how the hell will she pay the bills?  I’d so hate to see her go back to her old job. I mean, typically if you are the kind of guy that can pay 50K a pop…it’s usually not pretty. Poor thing. Allegedly.

Lisa is trying to get child support pregnant in a hurry and Lenny wants a kid. Nothing says improving fertility like discussing your miscarriages on national TV.

Adrianna is stunning in her painting. Clearly Frederic would not let anyone else buy it. Oh Lea, I love you but, “WHo bought it, you?” and “How much airbrushing did you have to do?”  Was catty and mean. I love you Lea, but be ….civil.  Why the snubbing of Arianna? What will we find out later? Last week you invited a prostitute Joanna and some plastic surgeon’s creation to pimp your event and you can’t be gracious at this one? I’m disappointed. As an art lover, I’m starting to like Adrianna despite the fact that she doesn’t treat my Frederic as he deserves.Ugh Karent is so disrespectul at the art exhibit. Really? She just has to have her picture made with the artist? For the record, I’m not a fan of his “kinetic art” but still… if Karent thinks it can get her somewhere… UGH.

Back to the prostitute Joanna…I hate her. There is apparently a lot of counting involved in the cha cha.  And we all know Joanna can’t count past potato.

Back to Frederic… er I mean whatshername. A Dali? SWOON!  Is this real?

Sigh okay here we go into the crossdressing thing. This reminds me of the post I sometimes want to write about how gay men are portrayed on Bravo. HINT: always the offbeat stereotype…heel wearing hairdressers, cross dressers… it annoys me and it annoys me further because Lea is involved. Le sigh.

Ah enter Ana the reasonable, normal one. Thank the baby Jesus for Ana. She is the Carole of RHOM. We’re at a new art show and Lea seems to think a nude of  Adrianna is vulgar or something. Really? Maybe I missed something I am live blogging and I hope I am wrong. Nudes have been a part of art for…well forever. Nude women ARE ART, Lea. I’m starting to get irritated with you.

James or “Elaine” or whatever goes in on Marysol. That was so NOT.A.GOOD.IDEA.GIRLFRIEND. don’t start. I love Marysol. Alexia leaves. Good girl. Wait Lea, whut? It’s not in your nature to go out of your way to expose what happened publicly? Do you not know you are on TV? Girl, stop.

Marysol and Ana have lunch. Ana tells Marysol about the events. I hate this scene because I am TEAM LEA and TEAM MARYSOL and TEAM ANA.  Why is Bravo doing this to me? I’m disappointed in Lea already. Why are you trying to detract from Marysol’s successes on national TV? It’s not that I don’t believe you, but why are you dragging her down, Lea? Why? How does this benefit you are James/Elaine or anyone. Why in the hell would you, the one housewife who doesn’t need this gig, lower yourself in this way? Have I said disappointed yet?

Ana I love you girl but Marysol does not need to defend herself. She’s doing just fine. I get you want to defend her from big bad Lea… she certainly has power in Miami. But your comment that “she married a rich guy” is laughable. Did she marry a rich guy? Hell yeah she did. More power to her. We’d all like to “marry a rich guy” but the difference is,  HUGE between Lisa  who “married a rich guy” and very literally let him reconstruct her and tell her what to think as opposed to Lea  who “married a VERY rich guy and spent all of her time giving to charity. Lea Black does way more for charity than donating a boob job to the help.  Lea Black owns Miami in her own right.

Oh lord, it’s Lisa again. I can hardly wait. It is Lisa, Karent and is that the prostitute Joanna? I am really not sure. Lisa has something to say let’s laugh listen….did the dentist just quote Countess Luann?

Ana’s family is adorable.

 

PS

Back to the whore Joanna, someone who knows how do call her (do you?) just happened to call her at 4 am to tell her whatshisname is makind out with another girl? How special. He has not fucked her in two months.  OH NOES! Romain is making out with a dancer? THIS CAN’T BE TRUE! LOLOLOL. Oh wait what was that?  Did you just say “That’s how we met?” BWAAHAHHAHAHAHAH really? You are surprised now? Did you think you were special? BWAHAHHAHAHA.  Okay.  And it is funny because you have rollers in your hair as you plead with your boyfriend who is clearly over you to pay attention to you. Hysterical in fact. Deep inside something is not making sense to you? You’re a whore and he is too. Now he is bored with you. What’s hard to get?

Winter Party Festival. Let’s encourage gay stereotypes because we are Bravo. Ramon nervouses about his fucking around harming his free publicity. Karent is all..hey this is free publicity for me too, it’s prolly not true.

Share this:

  • Tweet

Related

Filed Under: Filming Real Housewives of Miami, Joanna Krupa, Lea Black, Marysol Patton, Real Housewives of Miami, RHOM

About tamaratattles

Come for the tea. Stay for the shade. Not for the easily offended. You're a special snowflake just like everyone else.

Comments

  1. Critter says

    October 5, 2012 at 5:37 am

    If you didn’t recap this show I’d have no idea what’s going on…
    Good job…

    Reply
  2. tamaratattles says

    October 5, 2012 at 11:30 am

    I’m amazed you can even follow that drunken “recap”. It was more of a drunken stream of conciousness. 🙂

    Reply
  3. Stephen (@NewJerzeyBoy) says

    October 5, 2012 at 12:22 pm

    OMG, I watched this episode of RHOM and completely understood it. Now after reading this blog, I have no idea what you are talking about. Apparently you must have finished the whole box of wine when you write this.
    I don’t like Lisa, Karent or Joanna at all. They are all one dimensional and add nothing to the show. Though I recommend they do keep Romain, if only to see him shirtless.
    Lea needs to get in there and start stirring things up more. I know she is part of Miami society, but she’s basically one those “ladies who lunch” and go from one gala to another, trying to be relevant.
    For me the whole show is Lea, Marysol, Elsa and of course Romain. The rest I can’t tell who is who without a scorecard. They are all a pretentious bunch. Now I must go, my butler just brought me my brunch.

    Reply
  4. USED2B718 says

    October 5, 2012 at 6:53 pm

    Too bad about Lea turning all Jill Zarin on us.

    Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Come For The Tea, Stay For The Shade!

  • The Hustler With Craig Ferguson
  • WTF Is Wrong With Armie Hammer?
  • Open Forum: About Last Night…
  • Open Forum: I NEED A FUCKING NAP
  • Southern Charm Recap: Treehouse of Cards Part 1
  • RHOSLC Recap: In Hot Water
  • RHOC Recap: Making Waves

SEARCH TAMARA TATTLES

Recent Comments

  • Nanette on Open Forum: About Last Night…
  • Nanette on Open Forum: About Last Night…
  • Nanette on Open Forum: About Last Night…
  • HeadRedYes on RHOA Recap: Don’t Come For Me Unless I’ve Invited You
  • HeadRedYes on RHOA Recap: Don’t Come For Me Unless I’ve Invited You
  • Allyson on Open Forum: About Last Night…
  • Ktina on RHOSLC Recap: In Hot Water

Archives

Privacy Policy

Copyright © 2021 · Metro Pro on Genesis Framework · WordPress · Log in