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You are here: Home / RHONY / Alex McCord and Simon Van Kempen…Um, Just Read This

Alex McCord and Simon Van Kempen…Um, Just Read This

April 24, 2012 by tamaratattles 14 Comments

Gif by RealityTVGifs
Um, there has been so much weirdness on my twitter timeline today, I am not sure how to respond. But since @realoldhouswife tweeted a story in Jezebel about Alex and Simon from RHONY I am compelled to share it with you lest I be icked out over here all by myself. Apologies in advance. Remember when Alex and Simon wrote that parenting book? Did you rush out to buy it?  Well, apparently neither did anyone else or we would have been forced to visualize this scene before now. Honestly, you probably want to stop reading now. Really. Don’t say I didn’t warn you. In their book, Little Kids, Big City Simon and Alex  describe the birth of their son François thusly:

Once he was finally out of my body, I experienced a tsunami of endorphins that was almost orgasmic, and I understand completely the stories other women have written about ecstatic birth. Simon was sitting behind me at the point of birth, and later when we untangled ourselves he discovered he’d actually ejaculated though hadn’t felt any of the normal lead-up to that. It may seem distasteful to some, and definitely neither of us was thinking of sex at the time, but with the rush of emotion and my lower nerve endings going crazy, it’s not too far a stretch to say that it’s a profound experience.

 Um…I don’t know what to say about that. Thoughts?

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Filed Under: RHONY

About tamaratattles

Come for the tea. Stay for the shade. Not for the easily offended. You're a special snowflake just like everyone else.

Comments

  1. Kay Tee says

    April 24, 2012 at 3:06 pm

    They have ALWAYS come off as sleazy and disgusting to me … **shudder**

    Reply
  2. Anonymous says

    April 24, 2012 at 3:22 pm

    PERVS

    Reply
  3. Anonymous says

    April 24, 2012 at 4:09 pm

    These two are sick. I always knew something was wrong with them.

    Reply
  4. We Found Love in a Hopeless Place says

    April 24, 2012 at 4:57 pm

    Wait…what?

    Reply
  5. LAC says

    April 24, 2012 at 5:13 pm

    OMG- I just puked in my mouth a little. I want to hold a book burning…anyone? 🙂

    Reply
  6. Anonymous says

    April 24, 2012 at 8:42 pm

    OMG now I've heard everything….these people are WEIRD…….

    Reply
  7. Anonymous says

    April 24, 2012 at 9:15 pm

    TMI. TMI. TMI. Just imagine your their sons and someday you read that shit. Just how much counseling are those boys going to need???WD

    Reply
  8. Elkaye says

    April 24, 2012 at 11:14 pm

    Really wish I didn't read that excerpt. o_O

    Reply
  9. Anonymous says

    April 25, 2012 at 8:54 am

    Forced vomiting should help losing those last 10 pounds. Um… thanks for that.

    Reply
  10. Caramel Delight says

    April 25, 2012 at 12:04 pm

    I've always said that those two were weird. Seems very pervish to me, specially Simon.

    Reply
  11. Sweeetbea says

    April 25, 2012 at 5:54 pm

    Earlier today I noticed that Alex had responded to someone's tweet about the post. Alex replied that the writer of the post was getting hammered in the comments. Tamara, not you know me … me nosey. I went to the post to read the comments and they are drop dead hilarious! I so love snarky people!

    Reply
  12. claire says

    April 25, 2012 at 6:53 pm

    THANK YOU TAMARA! I've discovered what I will use to lose 20lbs. for bikini season.

    Reply
  13. Anonymous says

    April 26, 2012 at 11:54 am

    Can someone please make these two go away back to his country, maybe disgusting perversion is the is the norm there. Ugh makes me sick!

    Reply
  14. Camille says

    January 25, 2013 at 9:00 am

    All I have to say is WHY????? Why post such weird filth? I wish these two would just get a life & stop bombarding the internet with their cyber-weirdness, ewww!!!! Now I am left with the horrid image of Simon ejaculating #_#??…

    Reply

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