When the first episode of the Real Housewives aired, I was appalled. I finally understood why the Italians didn’t like Jersey Shore and couldn’t just accept it for what it was. This time it was my town and the people representing us were strippers and NFL groupies who just ended up here and became the damn yankees that won’t go away. The locals knew they had nothing in common with Atlanta’s old money or even Atlanta’s nouveau riche. But I watched and cringed over what is now four seasons as the “characters” parodied “southern belles”, discussed their vaginas in detail, and made public spectacles of themselves. Even more horrifying was the addition of foreign travel. Dear Lord, they are taking the show on the road as the only ambassadors of Atlanta some South Africans will ever know. I watched every episode. Then at some point I got this harebrained idea to blog about Atlanta, and then entertainment shows in general. It was perhaps the most hypocritical decision of my life. Despite all the commenters who descend on my blog calling me a “hater” my secret shame is that I don’t feel I hate the show quite enough. Back when the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills was exploiting suicide and alcoholism, I wrote a love letter to Andy Cohen in which I tried to break up with him, and Bravo, but like any girl stuck in a bad relationship, it was an idle threat. I posted along the same theme previously here. Instead, I became one of the first people to campaign for Shahs of Sunset. I posted every scrap of news I could track down and transferred my love of Andy Cohen to Reza Farahan. Reza is my new imaginary gay boyfriend who is taking Bravo by storm. I interviewed GG and Asa and got to know MJ and Reza and Sammy and even Mike a little bit. By the time the show began, I was genuinely rooting for their success. I’m happy for all the cast that a second season seems to be a no brainer. I’m a fan of the show. But despite personally liking all the cast mates. I’m back to being upset with Andy Cohen.
I’m sure Andy is a lovely guy. But he is the face of the Bravo network so fairly or unfairly he is the person to whom I direct my displeasure. What it boils down to is this. Bravo makes women behaving in the most despicable manner Internet heroines. In a time when the media is on a huge kick to stop bullying Bravo has made a business out of glorifying it. Bravolebrities who flip tables, call each other slut pigs, yank wigs, and scream insults across dinner tables are exalted on twitter for “keeping it real.” As Asa Soltan recently said on her Shahs of Sunset blog, there is a difference between “keeping it real” and “being unstable.” Amen, Asa. My impetus for writing this blog today is the timeline of Golnesa Gharachedaghi on twitter. I enjoy watching GG on Shahs of Sunset. I’m sure that the comments for this post will be full of the usual allegations that I am a “hater” because I don’t condone her behavior. I’m okay with that. After more than 48 hours of reading her timeline, I have to vent. It’s my blog and I’ll vent if I want to. So let’s take a look of what is irritating me.
It’s the whole “girls night out” I have a problem with. Girls night out on a reality show bears no resemblance whatsoever to any girls night out I have ever participated in. First of all, girls night out is supposed to be fun. You and a bunch of your friends figure out a safe way to get home without driving, head out to a bar, drink, talk about annoying things your spouses do, gossip about people who aren’t there, comment on any obvious eye candy in the vicinity, share pictures of your kids if you have them, and let your hair down. It is generally not the time to bring up that someone at the table was three hours late to a party, or confront someone for talking smack about you at an event weeks prior. These are people you choose to spend time with.Unless you are on a reality show. If you are shooting a scene rather than going out with people of your choosing it becomes more like an office party. Maybe you are drinking with the bitch from accounting and the girl who wears low cut blouses to managers meeting. Maybe there are people there you don’t like. Life is like that. Even on a reality show, the people at the table enjoying a round or three of cocktails are all expected to participate. This is where GG’s behavior becomes a problem. For the past two days GG has been retweeting support from her fans that call Asa’s friend Sunny a bitch for stepping into to the conversation about MJ being late to a party. GG felt that MJ’s work excuse didn’t hold water because GG feels that family and social life come before work. That is GG’s opinion and she is entitled to it. At the time the scene was filmed GG had no employment. She has since begun a business venture (hair extensions) or two but it’s pretty evident by GG’s own admission that she doesn’t work for a living.
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| Asa and Sunny |
Instead she has retweeted tweet after tweet about the incident. That Sunny bitch should have kept her mouth shut! You are not a mean girl, you are keeping it real! She had no right to butt into the conversation! What did she expect when you came at her like that! It’s crazy to me that GG’s behavior gets so much support and Sunny is quickly branded a bitch. GG is clearly unrepentent even after time has passed and she has seen her behavior on national television. It is easy to feel sorry for someone with such a lack of insight.
Of course I also follow Asa, and the tone is decided different there. She has not retweeted a negative word about GG. She made her position known on camera and left in support of her friend. There have been a couple positive tweets between the two and Asa quickly returned to talking about her music, and her creativity. Sunny has been kind and humble even suggesting perhaps she should have not joined the conversation at all. I should focus on that energy, I know, but the thuggish GG fans make me examine why I am participating in the Bravo machine that encourages that sort of mentality. The tweets seem to be celebrating hostility between women and even encouraging more of the same. Is it the same feeling of “is this really happening?” I had when I heard that Phaedra Parks, a woman who can’t behave respectfully in a museum remembering the atrocities of the slave trade, declares herself a southern belle who is writing a book on etiquette. Or when “Countess” Luann shakes her elderly behind while “making it rain” and singing Money Can’t Buy You Class. It’s like the whole world is going to hell and I am voluntarily jumping into the Bravo hand basket! Is it just me?
This is not my usual blog poking fun at reality characters we love to hate on TV. I understand that production encourages Bravolebrities to behave badly. I really don’t think they have to coach GG very much, but I could be wrong. I just find myself doing some soul searching as to why I not only support Bravo by watching every show they throw my way, but publicizing it on my blog. I have no intention of boycotting them or stopping posting about them. Much like my readers who think I am the worst blogger ever and run here everyday to tell me so, I’ll continue to tune in to Bravo and report here what a terrible thing they are doing. After all, nothing brings the ratings to a blog or a Bravo show like hypocrisy. So as disheartening as it is to see GG’s fans calling bullying “keeping it real” I have to accept that I too, am part of the problem. And just like GG I am not planning on changing. 
I LOVE YOUR BLOGS,VERY WITTY,I TOO FEEL LIKE I'M BREAKING UP WITH BRAVO EVERY OTHER DAY,AND FOR SURE SHAHS OF SUNSET I WAS NOT GOING TO WATCH ,THEN OOPS I SAW REZA AND BY THE TIME HE AND HIS FATHER HAD THE MEETING I WAS COMPLETELY IN LOVE..O.K I NEED TO GO GET A LIFE..CAN'T WAIT FOR TONIGHT O.C.
I agree. It was a pipe dream to think that GG could watch herself on Shahs and come to the realization that she is in need of serious therapy and humility. That's why she was cast on this show – she's the trainwreck that we're all watching. Her environment made her; don't think she will ever change. It would take a serious psychotic break with reality and more IQ than she could ever dream of owning. I'm participating in the trainwreck just like you. Is her father so pleased that GG's earning a paycheck for this that he's willing to overlook the obvious repeated humiliation of his daughter on screen? Seemingly so. Her sister seems to be considerably sharper than GG. She realizes that her sister has severe problems with the truth and with reality. At some point watching the GG Trainwreck on several media forums is sick. The shame is setting in.
I enjoy reading your blog. Even though I do not watch Shahs, you are correct in stating that no matter what we as readers think it is your blog to write whatever you feel like. This is YOUR blog to state YOUR opinions.
Thanks Doxielover. I read that with the mental disclaimer of "no matter how longwinded and obscure they may be…" 🙂
I wish I could QUIT Bravo. ….Its my crack.I wasn't impressed with Shahs at first but the last 2 epi's have me hooked. Reza's grandma is EVIL!
Tamara,I've been on pain meds for over a year and you need to help me out. Why are you back to being upset with Andy?
Why have you been on pain meds for a year? I've only had this blog for five months and now you are telling me you've been on drugs the whole time? This only adds to the shame of the company I keep online! As for my relationship with Andrew, it's complicated.
I was not going to watch Shah's as expected to be mostly propaganda like the other show about Iranians. Are the trying to hide their identity to be liked? The country has not been called Persia since about 1935. The revolution, in I believe 1977, when many of the upper class, (parents of the Bravolebrities) , choose to flee the country was the fall of the SHAH OF IRAN, not Persia. I do watch the show so far. I have not wanted to see what is on Twitter as I find GG especially so disgusting that I just don't want to get that mangled up in frustration. I thought maybe there was some hope for her when she sincerely apologized and embraced one woman she.tried to verbally abuse. The next episode she does it again, new victim, as you referred to in this blog. GG is an ungrateful bitch and I think an embarrassment to her culture whatever they call themselves. Her own father, who appeared to be a nice loving family man, is fed up with her extreme mooching. I should not watch the show, see how I get, want to eat to calm down….. Grrrrrr. And Reza makes too big a deal about being gay. So what, anymore with out and proud I am wondering if it's about 50/50 gay/straight. His culture he wants us to belive is particularly biased, they also believe in justified "honor" killing of young women not living or marrying in old world ways, yes, even in America. Apparently not this group of "friends" they look a little slutty most of the time. Reza either doesn't accept himself of wants sympathy. I would rather see him flirt and date and grow up of Daddy issues, poor Reza. So far I like MJ best but she is a sloppy, funny drunk.
Bless your little ole heart. I am always a fan…but not of the SOS. Stopped watching after the 1st show. Just too staged, sorry. This is Your Blog, not the public's. If they don't agree with you – they can do what our MaMa's said – kindly disagree and leave.Now, after the finale, I'm dropping RHOA. I feel they've run their course, and then some. Like you, I was curious in the beginning since I moved to ATL in the early 80's as a youngin lookin for my first "real" job. As our city grew and matured we gained more accolades. Now, I feel like the RHOA have brought us back down. It's a shame – but an old friend who is in the entertainment industry told me at the beginning – if you don't believe that any reality show is staged you're in denial. Now I believe him.The more I think of this, the more I may stop watching Bravo all together. The All Star Show was a disaster, and embrassing.
Shahs of Sunset originally captured my interest due to the culture. However, they aren't any different than any other upper class section of society no matter where they are from. They think they are above those with less money yet how many of them would be anywhere without their parents helping them get started? Poor, little GG is never going to grow up. She's just looking for a man to take Daddy's place and pay the bills for her so she can shop to her heart's content, accomplishing nothing in life. I laughed at how she spoke of how she sponsors kids all over the world, supporting charities, etc. No, GG, your parents do that. When you start working, paying your own bills, ALL of them, and use your own money to sponsor charities, then and only then, you can take credit for it. Will that day ever come? It doesn't look like it since GG considers a busy day to be one filled with shopping. I like to shop, too, but I don't need or want 200 pairs of shoes with handbags for each pair. That's called excessive and wasteful. I was raised around plenty of money on the Mainline and yet we had to get a degree, learn to support ourselves, see what it was like to live in the real world and then we received our inheritance at the age of 30 IF we had met the requirements. I'm proud to say that all of my siblings and cousins have done so and we're better off for it. My children know the same is expected of them. They had the friends with the unlimited credit cards for clothes, gas, jewelry, dining out, etc. While my kids didn't want for anything, they did have part-time jobs and learned to appreciate the value of a dollar. They would never think of spending the money to hire a chartered jet to fly to Vegas, spend thousands of dollars on a champagne testing party or laugh at someone for having a dress that was four seasons old (my daughter wouldn't know the difference nor would she care). GG's father needs to look in the mirror. If he wants her to change, cut off the $$ and tell her to get a real job. These ostentatious displays of wealth at a time when we have people living on the street because they can't pay their mortgage are an insult to those who work hard. I'd love to see more people on these shows that would offer a contrast to the so called "reality" of their lives as seen each week. Let's make these shows REAL as in the world as it is in 2012.
Tamara while you are on your soap box could you get the NAACP to organize a boycott against VH1 for the coonery and bufoonery show the put out starting with the Basketball Wives series?!
I meant Coonery and Bufoonery shows they put out! Darn this phone! Lol
I don't watch basketball wives. I'm a reality junky since the very first episode of The Real World. In one of the early seasons we met Tami Roman (is that the right last name?) She was the first crazy person I ever saw on a reality show. Not fun southern crazy but deranged. She was completely without redeeming qualities or likeablity. I just can't watch her ignorant ass on my television. Apparently I do have some standards when it comes to TV and Basketball wives violates them.
THIS. WAS. A. GREAT. POST. I feel like they heavily edited Sunny & GGs argument bec I felt like GGs behavior wasn't THAT bad bec they made it seem like Sunny just jumped in from nowhere but I'm sure GG said a lot more than we saw. Asa's comment about being "real" was great!! That woman is amazing. GG is just immature and that'll probably never change unfortunately…I bet if MJ stopped working so much & focused on playing w GG and lost a huge chunk of her income GG wouldn't want to be around her. So chill out GG!!
As much as I say I hate Bravo sometimes…I can't quit it.WD
Awww bless your heart Tamara! Like you, I have tried to quit Bravo, but I just couldn't. I don't like all of the shows, but I just can't quit the housewives. Let me say a prayer. :)FG
You know, Tamara, we're all Bravo addicted …. otherwise we wouldn't be checkin your blog for the latest news and your way of telling it. I found this blog probably about 3 months ago, trying to get all the tea on Sheree Whitfield and you had it my friend! Now, in terms of Shah's – after I heard GG's spot: "I don't like ants, and I don't like ugly people", I was an instant hater and refused. So, I kicked an addiction before it even got started! I am totally stuck on the Housewives, even missing DC for a minute; but, I have found that eventually you get burn out. If I have to hear Caroline Manzo anymore, my ears will bleed from a brain hemmorage; before I could even get started on last season of RHONJ, I was sick of Teresa's bro and sister-in-law and cut the TV cord! And then there's RHONY – deliver me from Luann — she made me hate Natalie Cole for a minute! And don't get me started on Jill …. So, perhaps one day, we'll all beat our Bravo addiction ….. but, certainly, we'll pick up another