It’s another Sunday in the ATL and that means a new episode of the Real Housewives of Haterville. So I decided to take a stroll over to the Bravo site and see the latest blogs. Surprise, surprise, surprise, pretty much none of them have updated. The last one to blog was Cynthia. Apparently, she felt the need to defend Peter once again. She was commenting on the episode where the fact that Peter dipped out on her at her agency opening had her less than excited about his attempt at a salsa date night. As you recall he told her that “he doesn’t like to say goodbye” so he just jetted. Yet, in her blog she says that he had stepped out to take a phone call and came back in after the speech. Once again, as with many of the housewives what they say in their blog does not match what is shown on the episode, or what occurred in real life
To tell y’all the truth, I am getting weary of blogging about the housewives. When I first started this blog, RHOA was not intended to be the focus. I had run across some facts that didn’t line up with what we were seeing on the show, like Sheree’s legal situation, some first hand accounts of filming, and a few other things I haven’t yet blogged about because the show has not aired relevant episodes yet. It was fun to watch the show and know what really happened. But now things are all sorts of messy, and quite frankly, some of the people on twitter take things way to far
This is my blog, and my opinion. Sometimes my opinion of a housewife is positive, sometimes it’s not. In general, my negative comments are fairly benign. I think Nene Leakes needs better foundation garments. I think Sheree Whitfield needs to spend more time and money on her children and less on trying to pretend she is rolling in the dough. I think Kim Zolciak-Biermann needs a new stylist. These are the types of criticisms I share with y’all here. I do not EVER tweet any housewife with these opinions. For one, I am not egotistical enough to think my opinion matters to them. Why would it
Others are that egotistical. Click through the jump to see who I think may die as a result of the highly objectionable behavior of some folks on twitter
There are people who actually tweet the housewives insults, threats and more vitriol than I could ever have imagined could be conveyed in a mere 140 characters. Other bloggers also have blogs that seem to be there for the sole purpose of mocking or vilifying the people on reality TV shows. I must confess that I post frequently at a messageboard that is best described as rude, crude and socially unacceptable. We say awful things about politicians, celebrities and mostly each other. Frankly it is a great place to go if you ever want to spew a string of obscenities at some moron. There are always morons there available. It’s a place where everyone there knows what they are getting into. Even there, when someone takes it upon themselves to stalk someone’s spouse on facebook or in some way cross the messageboard line into real life, our angry mob of idiots bands together temporarily to shun that person before we go back to bashing each other’s virtual head in. But Twitter is a whole nuther stop on the crazy train.
The cast of RHOA certainly has some issues, but the real problem with the nasty tweets and the serious effect they can have can be seen with the cast of Beverly Hills. It is clear to anyone with any background in psychology at all that both Kim Richards and Taylor Armstrong are suffering from mental health issues. Bravo seems to know this and neither Kim nor Taylor have blogs on their website anymore. Kim has sought help and has people around her that keep her from at lot of the drama. She rarely tweets. Taylor Armstrong is a whole nuther talk show. It seems the entire twitterverse is out for blood when it comes to Taylor. The level of vitriol spewed her way is off the charts. I am guessing that pretty much all of you here have determined that she is a manipulative grifter who is seeking fame and fortune at the expense of her husband’s life. Most it would seem do not believe that she has suffered any abuse. I see things differently.
While I would never claim the ability to diagnosis someone’s mental health based on their appearances on a reality show, I can say that she appears to meet all the criteria for Borderline Personality Disorder. I have read other people who suggested she has BPD say it as if it were an insult to add to their arsenal rather than a medical condition. More often than not, BPD is a result of abandonment and/or abuse of some sort during childhood. The way that Taylor would idolize Russell one moment and demonize him the next is classic BPD behavior
Whether people realize Taylor is unwell or not, they continue to tweet her awful things. Which brings us to a few nights ago when Taylor was out to dinner with friends. One thing to note about BPD is that the patient must have two or more impulse issues to meet the diagnostic criteria. If you look at Taylor you can see three right away, alcohol, eating and spending. So the other night at dinner, one could suppose that Taylor drank way more than she ate. When she came stumbling out of the restaurant, her friends practically carrying her to the car there was a mob of paparazzi mocking her and flashing cameras in her face. She was clearly in full on breakdown mode. What set this off? She had checked her twitter and read several nasty tweets. It is my belief that the people tweeting evil words to Taylor may end up having her death on their hands.
Which leads me back to this blog and what I choose to blog about. I’m going to be blogging about things that interest me. They may or may not have anything to do with any TV show or even Atlanta. I’m going to continue to stay away from the things that just don’t feel right to me. I’ll still be snarking on what the RHOA wear, and spillin’ tea and throwing shade on their public displays of stupidity. But there really are a lot more interesting things in the world.
I will miss the RHOA posts, but I don't blame you. I watch these shows and read these blogs for entertainment. Some of these people are WAY too into it.As I much as I like the shows (and Twitter), I don't follow any of the housewives there. That seems to be the epicenter of crazy, and it makes me uncomfortable. I have an opinion on Taylor (and most every one of the rest of them), but to actually talk smack directly to her…naaaah. That's not entertaining. That's just mean.
This is a great post & I agree w/you about all the hate spouted at housewives. I must confess, I do mean-tweet Kyle, but only cuz she blocked me cuz I asked her about lipgloss (or if we had to buy her book to find out). As far as Taylor, I'm not a hater & feel for her. I can't believe the judgment that's been passed on her. As someone with BPD, I cringed when I read that- not sure why. But I do agree w/the Russell hate/love, however, you got something significant wrong: To have BPD (or actively) you must have 5 of the 9 criteria. When I'm doing well & don't have 5, I think of it as being in remission, cuz it can come back at any time. But…mostly I want to thank you for addressing mental illness & not making it a joke. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
You make a lot of sense here. Sorta of think maybe more people should know about where you mentioned that you can post commentary and in effect act crazy (my words not yours) and get it all out of your system. Maybe if more people had that as an outlet, twitter might be a more humane social networking site.RHOBH has not felt right to me at all this season. Takes me back to Kelly on RHONY and her breakdown live on TV. It was painful to watch and not one second of funny. I couldn't figure out why Bravo would show that rather than just interrupt the filming and end the session and get her some immediate medical attention.It doesn't appear as if Russell's suicide has taught anybody anything. Reality TV is fun for viewers but can be unhealthy at a major level for the participants. Don't think they receive enough psychological counseling and guidance about the dangers of being on a reality tv show.Not even sure I want to watch RHOBH tonight as if rumors are true both Taylor and Kim will experience another serious breakdown. I know it was filmed months ago but I would think just rewatching it is enough to trigger a negative reaction.Kudos to you for understanding the issues, speaking out about it and making a change in your blog. Hopefully reality tv will go back to being just fun and silly without the danger element.
Thanks for the support guys. Just to be clear, there WILL still be RHOA posts here. I just don't feel the need to post about every dildo sale and model search. I have started to feel like I HAVE to post anything housewives and frankly there are some um, minor characters with criminal pasts I don't really want to cover here. :)And Jane, I didn't mean to imply that the two or more impulse disorders were the only factor in BPD. Just that those were very obvious in Taylor. They are one of the nine. She seems to have at the very least five of the nine. Sadly, it doesn't seem as though she is receiving treatment.Barbara, I struggle with my own issues, primarily panic attacks and depression. Getting treatment for mental health issues is at times a huge problem. Most of the best shrinks no longer take insurance and even if you pay are hard to get in to see. We really need to stop stigmatizing people and find a way to get them the appropriate therapy.
You have to stay true to you Tamara … and I am all for posting and blogging what YOU want to blog about…and leaving alot of that negativity alone. Blogging is extremely personal … so I understand where you are coming from. I will still continue to visit your blog … love the things you chit chat about … and you are right – it doesn't have to be ALL about ATL.I am on Twitter .. but the only one of the HWs I look at the most is Kandi … and that is because she keeps it positive and keeps it moving – as well as Phaedra. While people are turned off by Kandi and her sex toys … when it gets to be too much for me – I just scroll or flip … but I am still a fan of hers. Phaedra as well … I am just about POSITIVITY. I find many of the other HW tweets are just too damn negative … and I just don't engage…and I don't read it.So…you do what make you happy. Life is too short to not do what YOU want to do. 🙂
I love your blog, even if you would only talk about your shoes!
To BSB… r u serious about being miss positivity??? u loathe Peter just as much as I do. And I love it.
Anon – yep – I don't like Peter – but I'm talking about because I don't like him, getting on twitter and slamming him, or follow him or Cynthia on Twitter just to slam him..I'm talking about that kind of negativity.I don't like him and I call him out here and on Reality Tea … but I'm not going to spend all my time just focused on the characters I hate…if that makes sense.
Nobody should misconstrue this post that I am claiming I am turning over a new leaf, or going to be "nice". That will never happen. I will still be throwing shade on the housewives and others. I am just not following people on twitter who make it their daily mission to attack people on twitter. 🙂 Also, I have found that I really want to blog about more than just Atlanta. For two reasons, one is that sometimes I have things I want to blog about that don't have anything to do with Atlanta, and secondly because I want to free myself from feeling like I HAVE to blog on anything Atlanta related I might not be interested in. I promise to still bring the pleasant negativity that is me! 🙂
Tamara, very heartfelt and soulful blog..i admire you for finding the right words..a true fan..MaryKate
Ok,tonights eps. was painfull in spots to watch, where do I begin? First (and I'm just commenting as I recall em') the part at STRAITS…for one time (only) I agree with Sheree,WHY was Kandis' mom trying to get these grwn women to acknowledge one another and "make nice" when they clearly did not want to do that?? (meaning N,K and S) That was very uncomfortable to watch, and Ms J would NOT let it go. I see where Kandi gets her meddling from. What is it about saying NO that makes some of the women re-ask the same question that was already said NO to?? And what was the giggle-fest at the African Slave Museum about? I don't blame that lady who gave Ph.& Sh. the funny looks, I would have too. Have more comments but have to stop.
I agree with eg: the scene at Straits was just TOOO MUCH! She kept saying she wanted to see them act like they use to with each other and not be childish about their differences, NEWS FLASH, Miss Joyce…grown women do have grown fights! They were really trying to be respectful and I have to hand it to Kim she seemed more respectful than the other two. NeNe was damn childish! But nothing gets me more than those scenes with NeNe and John. She's giggling and I'm closing my eyes! Too painful to watch!
The scene(s) w/NeNe and John…..is it just me? The scenes w/him come across as him really laughing AT her like a private joke that he thinks she is too stupid to get. Then she laughs/giggles (??)like she is some young "petite" blond or something…PLEASE. I know she is making her "paper" and I applaud her for that, but come on NeNe.
i gotcha bsb.. actually u have been pretty reserved about Peter. I only remember u calling him a snake which is nicer than the illiterate pig I called him. I wish Cynthia would correct his grammar! Can not stand how he talks! I think I will go on his twitter and call him an @#$%@@& and then some. Wink Wink.
actually the reason Kandi doesn't log has nothing to do with her bring afraid of the reaction. She doesnt blog anymore b/c bravo edited her last blog and i dnt blame her either! Its not right for them to change her words around and make it look like she said something when she didnt
OH!!! I didn't know Kandi stopped blogging because of BRAVO!!! Then I don't blame her!!!..wow…I missed that tidbit!
Yea she said it on KandiKoatednights……actually she talks about the show sometimes on there especially after the whole Miami thing. All of the comments really pissed her off she explained that the only reason she said the im rich thing is b/c kim and sheree kept poking at her trying to get info from her…she only said to get them off her back. She actually was being really loyal to nene even though nene doesnt even talk to her outside the show
At first the ho-wives franchise was kinda light entertainment. Back when RHWNY Bethenny was on with the Countess, Crazy Ramona and Shril-lJill. Then Howives of DC and Jersey started the downward spiral into crazyland/exploiting the worst in female behavior. I'm guessing Bravo noticed that the more venomous the interaction the better their miniscule audience was. The slippery slope of RHWBH brings the franchise to the Roman Coliseum games level, with Russell's suicide. I cannot in good conscious watch this channel anymore. It exploits the worst in women, and for the most part is making fools of them, if not thoroughly exploiting mental illnesses as entertainment. I find that perverse.That said, I believe Taylor is at least an advanced sociopath, and could really be a psychopath. I say this because psychopaths leave a lot of destruction in their path (Russell, Kennedy)…and Taylor is certainly doing just that. The exploitation of Russell's death instead of what would normally be expected (pull back and address what part she played, or go through a grieving process in honor of the Father of her child) is a clue to how abnormal she actually is.It's just gotten soooo sleazy.
I like your style Tamara, and your blog name does not limit postings to anything other than what you find interesting.Social media can be used for so many positive things, and it amazes me that people use Twitter and FB to just be mean, and bully. Many celebrities and reality stars think people follow them because they like em – but the reality is many followers only want drama. Sad.Linda
I don't see any problem with blasting any of the members of these reality shows. If you sell your soul to the devil don't be surprised when he comes to collect. Would anyone of these people do what they are doing if they didn't want the money and the fame, no. NJB
My problem with it, NJB, is that some of the people have clear mental health problems. Most people don't encourage jumpers to take the leap but they think nothing about tweeting vitriol to the housewives. And they feel perfectly fine about doing so on a daily basis. In those cases it would seem that the housewife they are tweeting is not the only one with who needs a bit of therapy.