Brandi drops by her dear friend Yolanda’s house just like she didn’t just call her daughter an alcoholic on her last visit. Yolanda has Brandi doing a 21 day cleanse so that she can prove to the other girls that she doesn’t have a drinking problem. That will prove nothing. She is basically doing my Lent plan! I love how Yolanda has to tell the yoga instructor she has had no sugar and no alcohol. He seems to care not at all. I wonder if these yoga scenes are being aired out of order.
Yolanda is organizing a scavenger hunt all over Beverly Hills. It sounds like so much fun. I love stuff like that.
Ken is planning a surprise birthday party for Lisa. He calls Brandi to invite her but requests that she be on her best behavior. Brandi is offended. Because, Brandi.
Eileen and Vince are eating dinner at an outdoor table at a restaurant with the magnificent looking salads and seared scallops. I want to go there! Eileen ordered pasta! I don’t think it ever touched her lips but she twirled it around a lot. Of course the topic is…Kim. Because clearly that is all they are going to talk about this season. It’s such a waste of Eileen and Lisa Rinna. They have so much going on in their lives that I was hoping to see. It looks like Vince has written a new script and they have invited all of the lades over to …I’m not sure. Do a reading? Surely they are not auditioning. Am I the only one looking for Eileen’s nipples in the talking head with her green lace top? I guess there is a nude underlining.
Everyone except Brandi is invited to the table read. Kim tells Kyle on the way to Eileen’s that she thinks Eileen overstepped her bounds bringing them together to talk. Kyle is worried about Brandi hurting Kim. The two Lisas chat on the way to Eileen’s house. Rinna wants to confront Kim and Vanderpump says she has tried that and we don’t know what is really going on. Vanderpump wants to stay out of it.
At the party, Vince chats up Kim and asks about her most famous co-workers as a child. Vince is so good with these women. Except he doesn’t give Rinna a role, he makes her the announcer. Vanderpump wants to change roles with Rinna. In the talking head Vanderpump makes it clear she is unhappy with her part because it only has two lines. On the vanity of these ladies. Anyway, the script reading went well I suppose because the footage was short and everyone was sober. Oh wait there is another scene where Vanderpump demands to hold Eileen’s Emmy and she graciously lets her.
The Lisa and Eileen are talking about Rinna’s lunch with Brandi last week and Kim stumbles into the conversation. Kim talks about wanting to have her friend and her sister. /eyeroll Kyle looks 20 years younger on the episode. Seriously. She looks beautiful and almost like she has work done or gotten a really good facial. Mabye it’s just that she is not wearing much makeup at all. She’s really quite pretty. Vanderpump and Rinna are trying really hard to be supportive of Kim. They are offering her help and suggesting she stay in touch with someone on a daily basis and she totally blows them off.
OMG! OMG! REAL HOUSEWIVES OF MELBOURNE STARTS MARCH 5TH ON THURSDAY NIGHTS AT 9 PM! YAAAAAAS!
Kyle goes to see Lisa about Kim. Kyle is worried that Kim is revealing too much personal information to Brandi. Brandi has quite the history of stabbing people in the back with information they have shared. Lisa says that Kim treats Kyle like shit because they will always be sisters. But with Brandi she has to cultivate the friendship.
Vanderpump’s birthday party is at Pump. Vince and Eileen arrive first and hit the bar. I love this couple. Vince is just so fine with whatever. Rinna comes next and both Rinna and Eileen are in pink. Because, Pinkie.
Brandi is in the car with her gay roommate and Kim and Kathy Hilton. Brandi is telling Kathy Hilton about the new girls. She has nothing but bad things to say about them. Because, Jealous. Brandi says that she did throw wine in Eileen’s face “on accident.” Lisa’s gay (shut up) Lance Bass was there and Mohammed and his current chick. Brandi is correct that Mohammed’s toast is creepy. Vanderpump challenges Brandi to sing her a song about how sorry she is. And Brandi does. Brandi also looks prettier than usual tonight. Maybe production is just giving everyone good lighting. I’ve paused at Kyles talking head and she looks no where near as pretty as they do on the actual show. Everyone sings. Well no one can really sing except Lisa Rinna. She sounded pretty good. Eileen stayed in her seat like a dignified woman. Or else she was home fucking Vince by then. Either way. Smart move. Brandi mocked the girls having fun together as the” menopausal women.” Oh Brandi, your time is so much closer than you think and karma is a bitch.
Lisa and Brandi pretend to steal the center pieces. That’s an interesting duo. I would totally walk out with a centerpiece. I’ve been know to do it at weddings. Particularly, if I did the floral arrangements….Ken bought Lisa the pink ring she wanted. At a steep discount with the Bravo promotion.
Eileen approaches Kyle about Kim. It’s not really her place. Eileen wants to know if she has a sponsor. Kyle says in her talking head that she knows that the new girls
Next Week: David Foster has a cool charity event and it looks like the ladies go via his private jet. Yolanda’s scavenger hunt happens. Kim goes off on Lisa Rinna. And the ladies go to Amsterdam! I love a good European vacation episode!