Nene Continues To Think She is Kim Kardashian

RHOA nene ass

This is just pathetic. On so many levels. I’m already hearing Nene was fired from her DRAG QUEEN job in Vegas before it ended.  If she can’t play a drag queen for a week, there is no way she can close out a Broadway show for a month. You heard it here first. Nene quits ERRYTHANG. Wait and see. Nene’s comment?

Me and my girl @kimkardashian about to break the Internet Bay Bay LOL..

How low can you go trying to build off Kim K?

I’m investigating the rumors about Zumanity.  I can confirm the shitty reviews, but there is more. I don’t expect her to last as long as the show…

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Filed under NeNe Leakes, Real Housewives of Atlanta, RHOA

Jodi Arias Hearing Over Porn on Travis’ Laptop (Recap)

Jodi Arias Juan 1121

In more bizarre news on Friday, there was a hearing due to a motion by the defense that alleged the prosecution deleted porn off of Travis Alexander’s laptop. I completely forgot to recap this yesterday but I am going to do a whiz bang short version really fast. (I hope). We started out with Jodi’s old attorney, Maria Schaffer, on the stand to testify that Detective Flores was the person who turned on the laptop which somehow caused all the porn to be erased from the laptop. (Yes I know that makes no sense. I’m just reporting to the best of my understanding. Willmott is handling this witness. She asks about who turned on the laptop. She claims Detective Flores did. Juan is up next. He argued back saying SHE is the one who turned the laptop on and it was against his better judgment. These two don’t like each other. There was a lot of back and forth between the two. Martinez was very animated and heated. Both recall the other as the person who fired up the computer. Maria says she was there to get an idea of how much evidence was on the computer so she could put in a request for money to pay a forensics expert. Juan points out that she has to turn the devices on to do that. They had laptops and cell phones in the review room, both defense and prosecution team were in the room together. Eventually, it seems to me that Juan got Maria to say that she turned on the computers and that caused evidence to be destroyed. On Willmott’s redirect Maria says, “If Mr. Martinez had told us that turning on the computers would destroy evidence, we would not have allowed that.” Basically, whoever turned on the computers is potentially responsible for lost evidence so no one is willing to admit who did it. Lots of finger-pointing on all sides. Maria claims that the only person who looked at files was Martinez. I thought it was Flores. This is hard to follow. The big takeaway is both sides are adamant that it was not them.

Next witness was Bryan Neumeister.he’s a computer forensics expert. He has previously worked with both prosecutors  and defense attorneys. He works for a company that specializes in retrieving lost files.He says that the laptop should have been turned on once to make a mirror image and never again. Bryan says that it should have only been turned on with a write blocker. It was instead turned on and off twice while in police custody losing 50 megs of data. Again, I don’t get it, how does turning on a laptop make it lose data? Continue reading

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Filed under jodi arias, News

Andy Cohen’s NPR Appearance Was Kind of Awesome

Andy Cohen at The Palm Atlanta

Andy Cohen is pretty much everywhere these days while out pimping his new book, The Andy Cohen Diaries: A Deep Look at a Shallow Life.  Apparently that includes NPR! Here is an excerpt of his time on the show, Wait Wait Don’t Tell Me!  Click this link to listen to the ten minute interview or read the entire transcript. The have Andy play their own game in which it is revealed is not just an expert on house wives, but house flies as well.  The excerpt begins below. I’ve bolded the most amusing parts. :)

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

And now the game where we take somebody who is fabulous and expose him to the opposite. It is called Not My Job. Any Cohen started out as a producer with CBS News doing tough stories from tough places, but his secret dream was to choreograph elaborate catfights between wealthy underemployed women. He is the Bravo TV producer responsible for the “Real Housewives” franchise and he is the host of the nightly live talk show on Bravo “Watch What Happens Live.” Andy Cohen, welcome to WAIT WAIT …DON’T TELL ME.

ANDY COHEN: I am so happy to be here.

(APPLAUSE) Continue reading

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Filed under Andy Cohen, Bravo Andy, News

Phaedra Parks Was “Unmoved” By The News Apollo Lied

Suddenly, this seems like a plea to Apollo's cell mate.

Suddenly, this seems like a plea to Apollo’s cell mate.

Phaedra has written a Bravo blog! It seems she has eeked out some time for us despite her lengthy client list and constant court room appearances, book sales, video sales, and of course burying corpses of various species.  Hurray!  Only it isn’t a blog. It seems that Bravo has resorted to giving certain housewives a Q & A  format to actually encourage them to get something in each week. Writing a blog post is a difficult thing for some it would seem.

For the most part the blog is about her tirelessly role as a mother to two young boys. Phaedra really does do it all! With help from her mother, a fulltime nanny and a small tribe of babysitters, Phaedra manages to be “Super Mom.” I’ve spared you most of that.  Because the important part is what she has to say about Kenya. Continue reading

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Filed under Apollo Nida, Kenya Moore, News, Phaedra Parks, Real Housewives of Atlanta, RHOA

How To Get Away With Murder: Kill Me, Kill Me, Kill Me (Recap)

HTGAWM You lied

This is not going to be a very good recap. I’ve watched the episode twice now. The first time there was so much sunlight in the room I could barely make out the night scenes. I’ve now watched it again and I am still confused. I eventually read another recap to get a sense of what happened. Here is the gist of it.

Annalise and Sam get in a terrible fight over pregnant tank girl. Sam knew she was pregnant. Annalise has threatened him that everyone who came in contact with her including her professors will be asked to submit DNA. Annalise goes in on him and calls him a liar and a cheat and basically anything she could throw at him. Sam begs for forgiveness at first.

Then, apparently because Annalise likes to fight dirty and wanted to hurt Sam she tell him she has been screwing Nate. She tells him intimate details. Describing the immense pleasure he brings her. This causes Sam to lose his ever-loving mind. He becomes violent. Throws the phone. He tries to strangle her as she taunts him to kill her. Then he leaves.

Everything has led up to pretty much all of the Keating Five and Rebecca converging on the house/law office. Michaela for some reason wants to return the statute of blind justice to the office after deciding stealing it from Asher was a dumb idea. Rebecca is there to carry out Nate’s mission to retrieve incriminating files from Sam’s laptop.  Wes, Laurel  and Connor are going to make sure nothing happens to Rebecca.

Michaela arrives first followed by Rebecca. Sam tries to throw Rebecca out but she races upstairs and locks herself in the bedroom where she retrieves the files. Michaela calls Wes and tells him to hurry. She goes upstairs as well. Finally, the other three arrive and Wes gets Rebecca to come out of the bedroom. Eventually, there is a melee at the top of the stairs. Sam has grabbed Laurel (why?) and Michaela jumps in to help her. In the midst of the fracas we are to believe that tiny Michaela threw a grown man over the balcony. He’s dead. It was Michaela who killed Sam. Now we know. Continue reading

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Filed under ABC, How To Get Away With Murder

PSA For Atlanta (And Probably Other States)

Ferguson riot

UPDATE: The GSP has put a hold on calling everyone to Atlanta and Savannah until they are given notice that a verdict has been reached. It was expected to happen on Friday, and announced today but apparently the Grand Jury is going to meet again on Monday.  Stay tuned. Perhaps we can get through the holiday week before an announcement is made.

Just a heads up. Y’all know I have sources everywhere, but sometimes it sucks to even know. Apparently, in major cities in Georgia the entire State Patrol is being called in on Sunday for a five day period of on duty patrol. They will be protecting the capitol and other government sites in larger from idiots who want to act a fool. Once again a mob of idiots is going to make everyone who shares their skin color look like fools. The Grand Jury is expected to decide not to indict the cop in the Ferguson case. This is going to make fools who were not there and don’t know shit to riot and shoot people and get arrested.  As word has leaked that it seems that Mike Brown reached into the car and discharged the officers gun inside his vehicle, it’s rather obvious that the officer acted within his protocol to fire on Mike Brown.

So now,  ZERO State Patrol Officers will be home to enjoy Thanksgiving, more people will die a and black people will be stigmatized AGAIN because Mike Brown refused an order from a cop to get out of the street for his own protection and the safety of others. Instead, if initial reports are correct, he reached inside an officer’s car and discharged his gun leaving GSR on his hand. Continue reading

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Scandal Fall Finale Episode: “Where the Sun Don’t Shine” (Recap)

OH SHIT! LOOK WHO'S OUT OF THE HOLE!

OH SHIT! LOOK WHO’S OUT OF THE HOLE!

We last left the captiol, Poppa Pope had given up on his baby girl and high tailed it out of there to regroup somewhere. We begin with Olivia in her same white outfit and flat hair sitting holding her coat looking at her two men figure out what to do next. They have people looking everywhere. For some reason the go look in THE HOLE. Why would they look there. You think he would put his own ass in THE HOLE? No. No he would not. But not these fucktards have released Mama Pope on the population. Great work guys. Mama Pope thinks baby girl is going to save her, but she is not. She tells them to charge her mother and lock her up. Then hunt down her father and kill him. Olivia be dickmatized squared.

Meanwhile, Huck goes to check on Javi. His baby mamma is pissed and won’t let him in.

Joe Morton is still in the credits. YAY?!

Olivia finally answers her phone so that Quinn can tell her that Kuviac or whatever his name was and Elizabeth and the Vice-President were conspiring. Kuviac is dead and Elizabeth and the VP are screwing. Olivia just happens to run into Elizabeth as this conversation is going down. Elizabeth is pissed that the phone Olivia was supposed to clean from any bugs knows that her phone was bugged by Cyrus Beene. Elizabeth leaked Cyrus’ sex photos to the press. Continue reading

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Filed under ABC, Scandal

Real Housewives of New Jersey: The Shit We Didn’t See Part Three Thousand

classy teresa RHONJ

Dear RHONJ,

Please lay down. You are dead. It’s over. Fine! Arrivederci!

Love Tamara Tattles.

Fine. I will pay attention to you ONE MORE TIME. But this is out last breakup conversation. Do you hear me? No more. I’m changing my number. At least there is a psychic. I always like a psychic. Unlike you ungrateful bitches.  Oh they are astrologers! We have a surplus of those here at Tamaratattles.com  I can envision the stupid comments already. We will be hearing about rising signs and retrogrades for sure. They are ASTROTwins. Amber just says she has been a “devote Catholic” for the last five years. That’s like five lentil seasons! At least Rosie is there. When she is the exciting addition, we’re in for trouble. The astrotwins read the twins charts first. They are Virgos and people should be careful not to cross them. Amber decides to compromise her “devote” beliefs in about ten seconds.  Did you have difficulty with an Aries? She doesn’t know what anyone’s sign is. Melissa is an Aries and Amber was an Aries in a past life…so …okay I can’t with this.

Tre is up next. Taurus with Gemini rising. She is here to learn how to be a provider in this life. The astrotwins tell Tre that she is going to feel the most stress in the beginning of 2015. That is when she is going to the big house! They even say Saturn will be in her legal house. They also say something about changing Joe’s legal team. Interesting. Teresa doesn’t know what a backbone is. The astrotwins say that they will have to spend some time apart but it will make them stronger. Tre is crying. So is Melissa. They say she will have to downsize a bit in 2015.

The twins take Dina lingerie shopping. So they go to Victoria’s Secret. No, wait. No they go to a dildo shop full of crotchless panties. Because, New Jersey. Continue reading

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Filed under Amber Marchese, Jacqueline Laurita, Jim Marchese, Joe Giudice, Joe Gorga, Kathy Wakile, Melissa Gorga, Natalie Napolitano, Real Housewives of New Jersey, RHONJ, Teresa Giudice, Teresa Napolitano

Jodi Arias Trial Update for 11/20

jodi arias 1120 Fonseca

Today is a magical day in Pheonix, Arizona.  Much like a whale watching trip, where you board the boat and get your cameras ready and hope to get lucky and find a whole pod of whales to delight in. Maybe you will see whales all day. Maybe you will just see a glimpse of what looked like it might have been a whale. Maybe you won’t see a whale at all and you got on the boat for nothing. The last time we had any progress at all in the Jodi Arias Sentencing  Trial was last Monday. And then it was suddenly halted and delayed until today. With tomorrow being bottomless Margarita Friday, there will be no court then. So, the best we can hope for this week is to make about nine hours of total weekly progress in the case.  Let’s see how it goes.

We begin in the traditional way with two or three sidebars, one very lengthy one before the jury is allowed in. Eventually the jury enters and poor, embattled Dr. Forseca takes the stand. Juan Martinez has not even started taking his whacks at her and she is already showing signs of wear and tear. She greets Nurmi as he thrusts a thick stack of IMs between Jodi and Travis Alexander at her. I am already going to predict more of the same.

In these messages, that occurred just a week before the Jodi killed him on May 26th 2008 ,  Travis is jealous of Jodi’s interaction on social media. There is a comment she made to someone name Danny that “makes her look like a cheap whore”, according to Travis. He suggests maybe she is “just moving on to the next dick.”  At this point she is in California and they are not “together” so I imagine she did move on to the next dick. They are fighting. Forseca says that Travis is abusive and debasing in this conversation. You don’t say. And your point is? Continue reading

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Andy Cohen Makes People’s Sexiest Man Alive List

Andy sexy

People magazine announced their Sexiest Man Alive for 2014 yesterday and the tiara went to Chris Hemsworth. But never fear, Andy Cohen made the list and it’s an honor just to be nominated or something!

Andy tells Bravo’s The Dish, “I am shocked and amazed they asked me to be in the mag, but then I realized it was because of my hot dog—and it made sense. I’m OK with that! Wacha deserves to be in there! “  Andy said the shoot was done in his apartment and it involved a crew of 15 people packing into the bedroom he shares with Wacha. He admits, “Despite what you may have heard, that was a record. It felt very not-hot trying to look hot in bed, but when Wacha fell asleep in my arms I knew they were getting something good.”

Andy was asked who would be on his sexiest man list of Bravo men. I found his choices quite interesting. Andy chose, “Derek (Fredrik Eklund’s husband), Hugh Acheson, Apollo Nida, Mauricio Umansky, and Kelley from Below Deck!”  He must be going by dick size or something. If Hugh Acheson showed up in a public space where I was, I’d leave. In fact that holds true for all of them except Derek. How the hell did Derek get lumped in with these sleazeballs?

Who would your top three sexiest men on Bravo be? (excluding Andy if he were an option). Continue reading

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American Horror Story: Freak Show Episode 7, Test of Strength (Precap)

AHS FREAK Dell Stanley top shot

By: Urethra Franklin

Warning Freaktards: MAJOR SPOILERS

WOW tonight’s episode of American Horror Story: Freak Show is going to be good & bad with violence, music, sex, and heartbreaking DEATH!  Really I should just STFU right now, but I need TT to loosen up my damn chain. #SorryNotSorry

Last week Jimmy showed up at the Mott mansion determined to find and rescue the Tattler twins. One thing for sure it will be a strange encounter for Jimmy, but it will also raise suspicions about Dandy.

It’s obvious from the episode trailer that twins return to the Freak Show. This means nothing but trouble for Elsa since her freaks are already looking at her with mistrust and some side eye. Will the twins tell everyone the truth about Elsa & their disappearance? Or do they use it as leverage against Elsa for blackmail? And take a guess which twin has some #BlondeAmbition.

Click through to find out!

Continue reading

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WWHL With Camille Grammer, Adrienne Maloof & Taylor Armstrong

WWHL Adrienne, Camille, Taylor

Really? Has it come to this? The thirst is real y’all. Y’all know I am obsessed with the seating order. For the record, Camille got first chair followed by Adrienne and then Taylor. The drinking word is Brandi. Let’s hope they say it zero times. The game was Hot Po-Titties where they had to try to say something nice about Brandi. It did not go well. Someone commented today in a post simply, “Ho Po-titties”  I was reading via email and was like, WTF? Now I get it. Brandi tweeted assuming we all care about her situation with these three. She said she is great with Camille, she’s working on it with Adrienne and she is indifferent to Taylor.

Click through for my assessment of the three. Continue reading

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Filed under Adrienne Maloof, Andy Cohen, Bravo, Bravo Andy, Camille Grammer, Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, RHOBH, Taylor Armstrong, Watch What Happens Live, WWHL