Asa is on WWHL tonight with Sherri Shepherd. I have no idea why Sherri is still on my TV. I used to really like Sherri and I still really like one of her male comedian friends, but her whole surrogate baby issue really made me think I had misjudged her. So I’ll be mostly ignoring her comments. Hopefully we will get some scoop about tonight’s Shahs of Sunset!
The bartender is a dad that works at WWHL who is young and hot and has the most adorable baby girl with him. She’s an infant and not sure what to make of this whole mess. It won’t make any more sense when you are 30, sweet girl. Stay away.
I’m so bored I am wondering if Andy shaves his fingers. He has very smooth looking hands.
Asa basically refuses to play DILFY or not DILFY because she only wants to F her man. Sherri wants to fuck them all including Bernie Sanders and says that Bill Clinton sent her a letter saying he was voting for her on Dancing With The Stars because he likes her, and prostitutes. I don’t think Bill has had to pay for it in the last couple of decades. But there are rumors about his affinity for large, black women in Arkansas. But surely that is not true.
Before we even begin I am confident of two things. 1) Nene is pissed that Vivica is on the show. (2) There will be Kenya Moore bashing. Now I finally have a moment to check out Nene’s new face!
Andy starts right in at the introduction bringing up the time Sheree told Nene to “Fix that Face” ! Let the shade begin. I have a terrible memory, so I am probably wrong but wasn’t it Nene who said that to Sheree and Sheree told Nene to “Fix that Body!” ! That would make more sense anyway.
I blame my poor facial recognition skills for not seeing much difference in Nene’s face. I will say I am thrilled with her hair. I really need for hair to be symmetrical unless you are under 25 and club hopping or a lesbian. Otherwise, none of this ones side short and the other side long nonsense. At the very least you need hair on both sides of your head.
Nene says she talked to Cynthia this morning. They are back thick as thieves.http://tamaratattles.com/2015/04/26/real-housewives-of-atlanta-reunion-part-one-recap-nene-is-a-victim-act-one/# Peter came to Nene’s “comedy show” in Charlotte, Nene says that she is still friends with Peter and texted him just yesterday and he is doing good. Cynthia an Peter are the only ones who made it to Charlotte for her show.
I thought about skipping this recap but I spent the morning getting a tooth I managed to shatter over the weekend extracted. So now I have something in common with Sonja. Though I will be getting a permanent implant not a fake canine tooth from Banjo’s veterinarian. I do have a sudden urge to go to Wal*Mart in my PJs and bedroom slippers though. Anyway, let’s see if I missed anything last night.
Andy asks Sonja about her relationship with Tom and reminds her that Luann said it was a one night stand. Sonja takes office and says, “With Sonja Morgan, it’s never just once!” Which sounds weird to me. I guess that is a good thing? But wouldn’t a normal person say something like, ” Tom and I dated on a few occasions.” Of something less vagina focused? Sonja says they have known each other for ten years and they hook up frequently. He’s single, she’s single, he’s about to turn 50 has never been married or had any kids. She implies that they are good friends. So it is interesting that he never mentioned Luann.
I didn’t see Michael sending selfies and texting on the show last night because I was typing. That is kind of sad because this is a real divorce situation. Sonja says she was surprised by the news. I don’t think Sonja really filmed with Jules that much.
No one bothered to put up a photo of these idiots. Andy spoke at the Stonewall Inn vigil in the village tonight so I am not sure if he will come straight from that, or if this was taped. At any rate the photo above works for me. Let’s get this done.
Andy reminds us straight off the bat, that the old bat that goes after the young mother on the show is his personal hero. See? I knew this would be a shit show.
Next he let’s us know that stupid is a quality that Landon’s ex husband really likes, as one of his other ex wives is Stacey Dash. Stacey Dash is miles smarter than Landon. But so is a bowl of tofu. Andy feels bad that he called Stacey Dash dumb. I blame the mourning process, he never feels bad for being ugly to random women for no reason.
Ah, I can tell already the attorneys have gotten to this crew. Patti has been manically tweeting about how the truth about her nemesis would be revealed tonight, and when asked about his relationship with Kathryn he simply says it was a one night stand and he wishes her the best. When Andy points out how defensive Whitney got, he blames it on the moonshine. Not to defend the scum but I think I might have had a lesbian lover on moonshine once. No telling what happened, or could happen on that stuff. She was cute though so if I did, then I’m aright with it. Cameran jumps in to tell Andy what Whitney was thinking (despite him fully answering his own question) which in her mind is that he feels like Kathryn exaggerated the relationship. And she’s right. That is kind of the role of the beard is it not? Allegedly. I mean what do WeHo, I mean we know.
Andy began with a solemn speech about the murders of the LGBT members and friends in Orlando. He was a bit teary eyed but on with the show we must go. It’s just so heartbreaking.
Shervin won’t admit that Mike cheated ?! What the hell is wrong with him? There are women coming out of the woodwork with tales of his cheating. And hotel employees.
Brandi accuses Shervin of being gay. Then says she was joking.
Calum Best is the bartender.
Andy’s tie is the wonkiest it has ever been. It looks like while Dorinda was doing her twirl in her shiny jumpsuit for Andy, someone made him try to straighten it. It is back to being the normal amount of wonky now. Does this drive anyone else crazy?
Andy plays the dog pooping on Dorinda’s rug repeatedly. He is such a gross person. Andy says that next week is one of the top five epsiodes of housewives of all time and the entire thing takes place over two and a half hours at Dorinda’s house in the Berkshires
Despite the Twitter war between Dorinda and Ramona after last week’s episode, Dorinda says that she and Ramona have “moved on.” I really don’t think their friendship will ever be what it was before Dorinda came on the show.
The preview of next week shows Bethenny being a raving lunatic toward Luann and accusing her of not owning up to all the billions of people she has slept with. First of all, Luann copped to fucking Rey this week. So she is owning up to it. Secondly, why does Luann have to disclose all of her lovers to Bethenny or anyone else? Who the hell constantly wants a running tally of their friends sexual escapades? If Luann wanted you to know, she would share them with you. Perhaps the reason she doesn’t is because you are so damn judgmental, Bethenny. Luann should berate Bethenny about who she is sleeping with.