Mob Wives returned this month and I have not seen a single episode. I used to watch and blog about the show but it didn’t get many views. I was not thrilled with the addition of the Philly mobsterettes last season, particularly Natalie Guercio. She was the one with the kid and the mortuary business and the boyfriend named London Rene who wanted the party life while she wanted the white picket fence stable home for her kid.
Well, according to TMZ, the lovely couple was at a club in Brooklyn called Output when some dude that London knew decided to slice him up with a box cuter. He sliced down the right side of his head, his arm and a slice to the gut. Continue reading
Filed under Mob Wives, VH1
We return for the finale to Jenna wigging out because she is going to Vegas to visit her mother’s grave for the first time. Maybe the reason she couldn’t find it on her own is because it’s not in California? Jenna’s first reaction is that she never knew her birthday. That could also would have made it hard to find. Jenna starts spilling her heart out to her mother. She thanks her for watching over her all these years. This season has been a bit of tear jerker season between Jenna, and Dick and Treach… Jenna says it is the beginning of a new chapter in her life.
Juan says he is much happier with Nikki now that they have been through therapy. He and Nikki lie in bed and he is telling her how happy he is. He says, “I feel hope.” She corrects him and says, “hopeful.” This is Nikki to a T. She isn’t hearing what he is saying, she’s just correcting his grammar unnecessarily. In her talking head, Nikki seems to think they have made a lot of progress.
Sadly Treach and Cicely have taken a giant step back
since the last time we saw them. Apparently, someone related to Cicely has been staying in their house while they were gone. They bleeped a lot of it but from the gist of things, the person staying there has allowed some lowlife to stay there with her. Treach seems unfairly pissed at Cicely for this. He is mad because Cicely found out yesterday and she is just now telling him. She didn’t tell him yesterday because his father was there and they had just gotten to a good place. Treach is losing his mind over this random chick being in his house. Cicely calls Dr. Jenn. Continue reading
We’re back for essentially a part two of the last episode which I recapped at length here. Tonight’s recap will be much shorter. Treach’s dad was still being a jerk when Dr. Jenn spent a few more minutes with him. She ditches him to go find Treach. Dr. Jenn comforts Treach who is really devastated. His dad is having a huge breakdown in the green room, a place they do not usually film so this seems really real. Dr. Jenn goes to get Treach who doesn’t want to go see him, but Cicely goes with. His dad spills his guts. He is crying so hard, telling Treach he is sorry and he loves him. He knows he messed up and he’s sorry. Treach walks over and pulls his father up off the couch and they embrace and Treach’s dad sobs like a young widow over her husband’s casket. The sounds he makes are heartbreaking. The entire thing is heartbreaking. He’s begging for forgiveness. Sobbing. He says he will do anything. More begging. Treach says, “You just did it.” Oh dear God #allergies. Treach wipes his father’s eyes and says he is glad he came. #DeepBreaths
Deena and Chris finally argue about something. Deena doesn’t rub Chris long enough. He wanted 45 minutes and she only gave him 30 minutes. Seriously. That is the issue.
It’s time for group. The experience is almost over so Dr. Jenn wants each of them to tell their partner what exactly they need to go to the next level. Jenna is first. She says that for the first time in her life, she feels like most of her needs are being met. She is concerned that Mike might try to change her. Mike says he needs to be heard and not interrupted. Dick says he doesn’t know how to answer the question because they are trying to remain friends after the breakup. Dick says he just needs to keep her in his life because she is one of the only people he can open up to. There relationship is over but he doesn’t want to lose all of her. Stephanie’s response is not shown. She was never there as a girlfriend but as an ex and is in another relationship so this whole thing has been uncomfortable for her to say the least. Continue reading
I haven’t recapped this in a while. I think I missed one episode (maybe) and finally watched the last one where they take a sledge-hammer to a house to release all their inner feelings. I always thought that was a stupid exercise, but then again, all televised therapy is meant to be dramatic and therapy itself is a mere after thought. So on to tonight’s show!
Nikki is still bitching about not being heard and her feelings not being acknowledged. NONE OF THAT IS TRUE. What happened was Cicely read a tabloid story where Ande from her season talked about how she dumped Juan Pablo after her bang card date because Juan Pablo was talking about how he screwed the first girl on the first bang card (not Nikki) even though he was not interested. Cicely said in front of Juan and Nikki that if anyone talked about her man like that she sure would not be friends with them anymore and she might have to go all in to set them straight. Juan had a knowing look and Nikki is pissed that Juan didn’t defend her when someone pointed out that she should not allow anyone to treat Juan badly. What was Juan supposed to say? Oh “eeeeessss okay, for her friend to talk shit about me in tabloids?” Nikki is an idiot. If you had told me it was possible I would feel sorry for JUAN PABLO this season, I would never have believed you. Do I think he is into Nikki? Not at all. Is he doing the show for the money and exposure absolutely. Is he acting for the cameras to come off as the better person? Yes. Nikki on the other hand is not acting for the camera and her true obnoxious self is right there for us all to see.
Cicely points out that if Nikki’s “best friend” is someone she met on a TV show three months ago who was dating the same guy she was, then there is a problem. Dick on the other hand takes the time to be the rescuer of the damsel in distress. Because, that’s Evel Continue reading
After last week, when Dr Jenn berated and cursed out her clients and Dick Donato told Dr. Jenn he is HIV positive, let’s see what fresh hell is in store for us this week! Oh look! A “human lie detector.” Sigh.
Nikki and Juan Pablo are arguing about moving in together. Nikki storms off and goes to cry in the corner away from cameras. Deena tells Juan Pablo to go after her but he doesn’t.
Jenna is isolating after Dr. Jenn was rude to her. I hate her boyfriend. Dr. Jenn gives them the night off from the human lie detector. Everyone else has to go. Boys on one side of the room, girls on the other. Everyone appears to be less than thrilled.
The human lie detector doesn’t believe Juan Pablo. Dick says he can’t really talk about why he is there. Stephanie is pissed that Dick is here to come out with his medical issue and she was mislead. Stephanie said that there is zero chance they will get back together. Dick is sad. Everyone is curious about what Dick is hiding.
Cicely wants the lady to find out if Treach is cheating. Dick is hysterical in his talking heads. “Is this really happening? Are we are Jerry Springer? Will paternity tests arrive next?” The human lie detector believes Treach. Cicely still doesn’t believe him. Continue reading
Leann and Eddie take their parents on a family trip to Hawaii. I’m pretty sure the boys went too, but they are not allowed to be filmed. I seem to remember Brandi whining about this on Twitter when it happened. Leann’s mom has been married to her stepfather, Ted for about 13 years. Leann loves Ted.
Leann and Eddie rented a three bedroom condo and ranked third on bedroom choices. Welcome to vacationing with family. Someone asks what Leann’s mom is drinking and she says a virgin pina colada. Eddie asked why it’s a virgin. She says she doesn’t like liquor. She’s never smoked, drank or cheated on her husbands. Awkward silence. Leann says, “I’ve got you beat on that one!” Eddie’s dad is one of those people who spends his entire vacation taking pictures. I don’t believe in vacation pictures.
Leann and Eddie tell their parents that she is off birth control. Eddie says they are not deliberately trying get pregnant, but if it happens it happens. This qualifier seems to annoy Leann who seems to be trying without him. Continue reading
Photo Credit: VH1
Dating Naked has been a fun show on VH1 this summer. I think I have some sort of conflict when that shows comes on because sometimes it tapes and sometimes it doesn’t. I just watched the last episode where one of the female choices for the main male contestant claimed to be a virgin who had never seen a penis “in real life.” It was pretty funny. It seemed like she was not going to go through with getting naked right from the start. She finally did it and went on a date with a guy who I thought was kind of a jerk. They went out on a boat ride and she puked the entire time. She left the program shortly after the boat finally got her to shore.
So when I heard today that someone was suing VH1 (Thanks for the emails) for showing them naked on a dating naked show, I assumed it was that girl. But it’s not.
It’s a girl named Jesse. She looks familiar and I think I saw the episode, but I really don’t pay that much attention to the show when I watch it, it’s mainly background noise while I work on the blog. I can’t for the life of me remember anything interesting about her or her dating choices. According to her, on one of her dates they failed to blur her genitals for a second or two while she was wrestling a date on the beach. Continue reading
This season of Leann & Eddie has been pretty hit and miss. Let’s see what happens this episode when Leann has a houseguest with a baby. Where the heck are they hiking? It’s gorgeous!
Well that didn’t take longer. Eddie goes to see his friend Mike to get a haircut. He doesn’t need a haircut, so he had to wear a cap in the kitchen. Mike never touches his head with the scissors. The conversation is all about Brandi. Because that is all these people know how to talk about He even has a talking head about how he has no idea if Brandi is in a relationship. So it was basically a talking head about him having no clue about what he was talking about.
Leann’s mom wants a facelift. Leann babysits for her friend so she can have some time away from her baby. Leann talks about her step sons and changing the youngest ones diapers. While Leann was babysitting as staged call comes in about an emergency meeting that she needs to be at in 30 minutes. This way we get to see Leann struggle with car seat and carting the baby around. 2 Continue reading
Filed under Leann RImes, VH1
Let’s see if Leann and Eddie can actually do two interesting shows with no mention of Brandi in a row, shall we? The title of this episode is already Brandiesque so I am not very hopeful. This week the dynamic duo is having a couple dozen people over for a BBQ. Since Leann in on tour, her publicist (Can we all take a moment and have a moment of silence for her poor publicist?) has told her to keep a low profile. And out first Brandi innuendo begins within the first two minutes. Eddie and Leann agree that Leann never instigates the twitter wars she only reacts when provoked by stupidity. PUHLEASE. Could these people just block each other on twitter? Problem solved. I block people on twitter every damn day just because I don’t need even the slightest interaction with idiots and people I don’t like.
Eddie has a swimsuit photoshoot for Men’s fitness in two weeks. He must starve himself and work out twice a day. Meanwhile, Leann had just cooked him what she calls pancakes but look more like crepes made by some chef and they are planning a BBQ. Oh and did I mention Leann tweeted the pancakes in front of a mirror with her in nothing but a bra, thong and apron? Accidentally of course. Please. Who cooks in that? No one. That is who. Not an accident and she did not make the “pancakes.” Eddie suggests she delete it, but not a chance of that happening. Continue reading
Look, thirty minutes is just not long enough for a show about anything anymore. I realize in the olden days we had plenty of 30 minute sitcoms that worked. But back then, the commercial breaks weren’t nearly as long. In the present day, a 30 minute show is about 14 minutes long. It’s just not long enough for a decent story arc. Rant over.
This week our lovely couple goes to Nashville. But first, Leann and Eddie bicker about Leann’s over packing for a two-day trip. Eddie is intimidated by Leann’s father. Leann says she went coon hunting for the first time when she was two. Or four. Or Five. She killed a raccoon with a shotgun.
Oh I remember now. Leann sued her father, who was at the time her manager for mismanaging her finances or something. Leann has a tour bus parked on her dad’s property for her to stay in with Eddie. Leann has to go to an interview so Eddie is left alone with Leann’s father. Continue reading
Well, I can’t put it off any longer. I actually did some dishes as a better option than watching this show, but I am now out of hot water and my back is sore from bending over the sink, it’s 4:30 and I haven’t done a post all day so views are sucking ass. It must be done. Thank the baby Jesus it is only a half hour show.
Okay, now my DVR has stopped working entirely. This is special. After 20 minutes of trying to get the show to play, I’m noticing that the problem is specific to this show. Even my DVR refuses to cooperate with this shit show. It looks like I will have to do the recap based on just reading the description.
Leann goes on a weekend trip with her southern friends. Hmm, Leann has southern friends? Leann has friends? That must have been interesting. It seems that they went four wheeling or something. Perhaps she got injured and had to go to the ER. Perhaps the injury caused to be unable to speak or tweet ever again. My TV is trying really hard to show this recording but the screen looks something like a Picasso. Oh wait, it is playing now. Continue reading
I already hate it. They are just introducing each other and it already sucks. In their montage of taboid covers they make sure to include one with BRANDI CHEATED FIRST! on the cover. We start by going to the premiere of Eddie’s movie, Best Man Holiday. But no before Eddie takes a jab at Brandi for saying he does not work. That two jabs in the first two minutes. Wait it looks like two more jabs in the first two minutes. They are responding to gossip about a $50 dollar divorce and Eddie reaching out to Brandi for emotional support. Really? Eddie reaching out to Hank Baskett’s transvestite lover would be more believable. Okay we are up to seven jabs. Leann says that Brandi is just a mouthpiece to the media spreading lies. Leann is pissed that Eddie would not comment And that entire conversation in the car was filmed after the fact to make it look like they planned the Eddie denies Luann tongue on the red carpet “story.” Actually that tabloid story looks completely made up as well. WTF?
Luann’s contract is finally over. She was stuck in some sort of ridiculous 20 year contract from childhood.
This is the longest half an hour of my life. Continue reading