We begin part two with a break so that MJ can stop crying about her crumbling friendship with Asa. Mercedeh is very offended that Asa thinks she is trash talking her business. Mike tries to tell Mercedeh that she will regret the things she said to Asa. MJ is not hearing it. She says she is through with her.
We return to the set and Andy points out that Mike has some new hairbrained scheme every season. We get a package on Mike’s “shoe line.” Andy points out that Kitson went bankrupt a few weeks after the shoe party. Mike claims he sold them 2,000 pairs of shoes. That seems like a ridiculous number of shoes for one store. If you go in any shoe store you’d be hard pressed to find more than a dozen pairs of the same shoe. Mike says you can buy his shoes on his website. However, someone linked me to the sight a week or so ago and there was nothing there but a not that says “Shoes coming soon!” If he has two thousand pairs of shoes what is he waiting for? Then Andy makes fun of Mike’s instagram. It really is ridiculous.
Asa on the other hand was offered a deal for he kaftans to be sold in selected Nordstorm stores for a trial run. Her diamond water business has expanded and they provide the water for the restaurant in the Four Seasons Dubai. #Winning
Reza is going to do some sort of a play where he will be cross dressing as the Iranian Medea. Seriously?
I am totally confused about why the Shahs reunion is tonight. What are we missing for this to be on tonight? I slept an entire day away after staying up all night again. I really have to try to be awake during the day. I think I could sleep another ten hours right now, so I’m going to bang this out and go back to bed.
I love how this is the only series where they have champagne tons of food. So we start with all the food scenes from the season.
We all pretend that Shervin is straight. Suddenly, Shervin and GG are BFFs. Even though Shervin did not stick up for her.
Reza interrupts Andy’s little Shervin time to start going in on Golnesa right away. He is super pissed about the sex tape thing. The show can’t even discuss anyone else at all with Reza making it all about him and we are not even ten minutes in. Reza just screams at Golnesa and says she needs mental help. Her BFF, Shervin just sits there while Reza screams insults at Golnesa. I’m bored already. Let’s get to the part where Reza cries.
I’m so glad this season is over. I had never been as excited for a show as I was for Shahs when it first came out. Sadly, by season three the whole thing had become unbearable. These shows are always best when the cast is brand new. By season two they start all the fake storylines and in the case of this show in particular, they choose one person to shit on for the whole season. It’s not fun watching a pack of bullies attack one cast member all season long. This season was particularly bad because the guys were targeting a female who suffers from a chronic illness.
We start with MJ accepting her marriage proposal from Tommy. I really hope that Tommy makes her happy. I’ve always liked MJ. I hope she will spend more time with Tommy and less with Reza and her mother. Speaking of Vida, she has a fit after the engagement. She is particularly bothered that Tommy is so handsy with MJ. It was a bit much, and she blames it on his drinking. After the fondling session, Tommy approaches Vida. Tommy is Shouhed wasted and sobs and shouts and splashes spittle all over Vida while drunkenly begging for acceptance. It so very unattractive. MJ wants to show Vida the ring and Vida asks if anyone has a magnifying glass. I feel so sorry for MJ.
I love the scenes with Asa and her mother checking out OK! Magazine. I have always received copies of anything of mine in a tabloid in the mail from the publisher. Perhaps there was no financial transaction involved for this piece ? Anyway, watching Asa and her mother is such a sad contrast to MJ and Vida. Asa entire family is very supportive of everything Asa does. Even the really out there stuff. Asa’s very lucky!
I cannot believe that Reza’s mother would agree to be on this show. Does she watch her son on this show? How is she not humiliated? Will Reza call his mother a bitch at this lunch like he does every other human on earth that he interacts with? She seems like a really great lady. Reza doesn’t think he is like his dad. But he is.
Asa, Adam and Reza are chilling in Palm Springs. Reza thinks Palm Springs is just like Iran in the 1970s. Speaking of ridiculous, Asa …girl… you know I love you and I am all for wearing jewelry in unexpected ways, but I can’ with you and the whole necklace as a face mask thing. We spend a ridiculous amount of time looking at a potential investment property for Reza and Adam.
MJ is spending a lot of time with Tommy to decide if they are ready for her to get inseminated. She definitely wants to get married first.
Reza and MJ go out for ice cream. Reza let’s MJ know he is very happily married but is uncomfortable with the word ‘husband’ and prefers ‘partner.” Then they move on to gossiping about Jessica and Mike. Jessica has changed her phone number.
Golnesa enjoying the Mayan Ruins in Belize
It’s time for another episode of Shahs of Sunset where constantly cheating on your wife is quickly accepted by the group and met with tons of comforting words and emotional support; however, a chronic debilitating disease by a group member is cause for ostracization and public ridicule.
We start the morning after Asa, Golnesa and Shervin went out clubbing until the wee hours of the morning. Instead of Reza thinking, “Wow, I am so glad my friend got to do this since her condition is only getting worse. It’s great that she enjoying every moment!” he rants to us about how GG is faking her RA. Then he goes and talks to Mike and gives him tons of comfort and love. Because it was last season that his storyline was to degrade and humiliate Mike. This year it is GG’s turn.
The gang goes horseback riding through the jungle to the Mayan ruins. MJ wore high heeled shoes for this. Because, MJ. She rides the horse barefooted. Once they get to the ruins, everyone leaves GG in the dust. Her knees are giving her a lot of trouble with the climbing. But she makes it to the top.
At the bottom of the ruin, they gather for water and Asa tries to get Golnesa to be a part of her latest art project on couples. It was a private conversation but of course Reza has to butt in and point out that GG is not in a relationship. Because that is what friends do.
So Mike, why did you lie? I wasn’t lying. I was having marital problems between me and my wife (that is usually where marital problems occur) an I was trying to keep it under wraps but being on reality TV you don’t really have that freedom. You weren’t having marital problems just falling from the sky. You were cheating on a woman who had changed her religion and immersed herself in two foreign cultures to be exactly the wife you wanted. You wanted to keep it under wraps because you were embarrassed that you got caught and embarrassed to families. My DVR has stopped on Mike’s face and the look he is giving Andy is terrifying.
Mike tries to justify himself further saying that he didn’t believe the rumors that he heard but Jessica did. He heard Jessica wanted to leave earlier than she did. OF COURSE SHE DID. He has heard rumors that he is gay! Sandra Bernhard says, “well you do have a gay brow.”
So was it one affair with one person? Or multiple affairs? Clearly, Andy knows the answer to this, but Mike continues to deny and lie. He says it was one affair that started before he was engaged ( I wonder which one he is claiming? The one that wrote the book?) and she found out about it after she got married. My sources say that Jessica found out about many of the girls he cheated with throughout their relationship and she naively thought once they were married he would stop. He did not. Mike gives off every singly body language signal of lying in the world. He should be used in CIA training. Trainees, today we are going to look at the basic body language signals that someone is lying using this film from WWHL that encapsulates them all I a very blatant fashion… He eyes are also really messed up.
Sandra is disgusted by the entire show. It’s hysterical.