It seems like Jac Laurita has finally stopped trying to write the next great American novel every week in her Bravo blogs. She is also the only one that has one up yet. I hesitate to even post about it since the RHONJ recap comments have already gone to pot to be yet another fucking autism debate. I fear the hoards of rabid autism … I don’t even know what to call them… Internet experts maybe?…are going to take over every RHONJ post for the rest of the season. I will continue to ignore that topic, but it doesn’t seem to do any good. Especially this week where we FINALLY got a decent episode of the show. I should not be shocked now that the fun shows get very few comments, while the comments on shit shows like RHONY are still going strong a week later. This is why we can’t have nice things.
I’m going to only address Jac’s comments on the dynamics between Melissa and Teresa because that’s all I found interesting in her blog this week.
There’s something I’ve been noticing since the show has been airing that I didn’t see before: It’s the look on Melissa’s face every time Teresa or I say that we are communicating and/or doing well together or when we are saying nice things about each other. It’s been consistent. I think she was bothered by it. It may be where her animosity was coming from. She may have felt threatened or jealous of my friendship with Teresa. She shouldn’t be.
Did I miss this? I am always typing and more listening to the show than actually having my eyes on the screen at all times. I don’t find this theory far-fetched, but I haven’t seen the signs yet. Did I miss it or could this be foreshadowing?
(Photo by: Tommy Garcia/Bravo)
Tonight on Real Housewives of New Jersey, the girls go on a trip to a spa to celebrate Teresa’s first weekend without an ankle monitor. And I suppose we will hear several versions of the big fight between Jac and Teresa. We start with the annoying packing scenes. It drives me bonkers to see how these women overpack for a weekend trip. Did Teresa really just pack one bag.
Jac is riding up with Siggy driving. The other three are riding together. Dolores is driving Teresa and Melissa. Let’s just pretend the sexting between Teresa and Joe didn’t happen, okay? Both Teresa and Jac say they are not going to bring up their fight. No one believes that.
I’m tired of Siggy’s off base psychoanalyzing of her cast mates in her confessions. Really. I was hoping for more from her.
At the spa, there is no one to help with their luggage. But there is a butler holding flutes of champagne on the door step. Is that a good tradeoff? Probably not if you packed four huge suitcases like Melissa.
I literally had to force myself to wake up from my coma for this episode of RHONJ. I’m pretty sure it is not going to be worth missing any sleep over, but maybe they will surprised me.
Dolores is renovating her house. Wait, no she isn’t Frank her ex husband has completely taken over the project, and he is doing things his way. Siggy seems to be more upset about her lack of input than Dolores is about hers. I really wish I could have my kitchen gutted. I should have done it years ago but I wasn’t planning on staying here anywhere near as long as I have. Now I feel some sort of way about doing it for the next person. Later the girls come over to “help” with some demo. Delores’s business partner in the gym calls pissed because once again she has not gone in to work.
Since Dolores and Siggy have basically been run out of Delores’ house they head over to Jac’s to find her shoveling her own sidewalk. Or so we are supposed to believe. Of course it is time to rehash the fight between Jac and Tre. Even production is supporting Jac’s side of the events and actually shows that Teresa started the whole mess by bringing up crap from five years ago that Teresa has agreed to put behind them several times already. Of course we have the counterpoint over at Melissa and Joe’s, because Melissa has been tasked with fighting Teresa’s battles.
Teresa gets to remove her anklet bracelet. I am so tired of seeing Teresa’s ass in the air. I’m also annoyed that all of Teresa’s furniture is still in her house. Crime does pay.
Wow, somehow they got everything back on time for WWHL at eleven. This should be a good one.
Okay we are five minutes in and I haven’t typed anything. It usually takes me twenty minutes to recap the first seven minutes. I’m sort of at a loss for words. In general, Andy is being super nice to Sonja and talking about how it was great to run into her with her daughter in the Hamptons over the weekend. But he seems to be trying to set up a New York, New Jersey rivalry here. Teresa has learned not to say she has never met the other housewife before, because she always has, so she says she has probably run across Sonia at a Bravo event. As usual, Sonia points out that she has met Teresa several times.
The gif of the night, and the clips that Andy shows are all very negative toward Teresa and then he asks her why she was so upset with Jac, was it calling her brother or the bankruptcy fraud. Teresa says that the second one was uncalled for. I cannot comprehend how someone who held up an entire filming season because they were in prison for bankruptcy fraud would expect to film and have no one mention the crimes she committed.
We see a clip from the next RHONY where Bethenny, Ramona and Sonja continue their obsession with Tom. Sonia says that she slept with Tom just before Thanksgiving. Andy says that Sonja gives new meaning to the term, “Thanksgiving spread” because Andy feels like that is an appropriate thing to say to a woman on national TV.
(Photo by: Tommy Garcia/Bravo)
It’s time to head back to New Jersey to hang out with our favorite Felons By Bravo. Frankly, we are off to a dull season. Sure Jac is going to stir the pot tonight, but I’m really not interested in anyone else’s storyline yet. I need Dolores and Siggy to deliver, because it doesn’t seem like Teresa can carry this show. There are only five women, which is something I have always wanted, but they have to be five established women with interesting storylines.
PSA: Teresa and Sonja, who are probably two of the most delusional housewives of all time are on WWHL tonight. Who will spin the most lies? WOW. Huge time delay due to Olymipic Tennis, about 34 minutes. I don’t know how this will effect WWHL tonight. I went ahead and started watching Big Brother and it is a magnificent episode so far. I thought they would try to edit Paulie a bit better but they are showing it all.
Just like most of us, Milania has had enough scenes with Tre yammering on about yoga. Melissa calls to invite Teresa and Milania to NYFW where Melissa’s kids will be walking in someone’s show.
I had to take a break before blogging this episode. If it were not for Dolores I probably would have just deleted it from my VCR. I cannot STAND Reza. I really can’t. And Andy isn’t much better. We all know that Dolores is on the show tonight just so that Frankie can be the bartender. From the moment we all saw Frankie, we knew that Andy would be obsessed with him. Frankie is not even old enough to vote, let alone drink.
Andy says Vida will be on the reunion and it is going to be “scorched earth.” He’s giddy at the demise of the mother daughter relationship.
I totally had no idea Sharknado was on. I am taping a rerun now but it’s over an hour in already I think. I will have to catch the first part on demand and then flip over so I can skip the commercials. It actually looked kind of good.
Dolores said she and Teresa had lunch the day before she went to prison and Teresa didn’t mention it. She said she felt like Teresa didn’t think it was really going to happen. Oh, but it did.