I literally had to force myself to wake up from my coma for this episode of RHONJ. I’m pretty sure it is not going to be worth missing any sleep over, but maybe they will surprised me.
Dolores is renovating her house. Wait, no she isn’t Frank her ex husband has completely taken over the project, and he is doing things his way. Siggy seems to be more upset about her lack of input than Dolores is about hers. I really wish I could have my kitchen gutted. I should have done it years ago but I wasn’t planning on staying here anywhere near as long as I have. Now I feel some sort of way about doing it for the next person. Later the girls come over to “help” with some demo. Delores’s business partner in the gym calls pissed because once again she has not gone in to work.
Since Dolores and Siggy have basically been run out of Delores’ house they head over to Jac’s to find her shoveling her own sidewalk. Or so we are supposed to believe. Of course it is time to rehash the fight between Jac and Tre. Even production is supporting Jac’s side of the events and actually shows that Teresa started the whole mess by bringing up crap from five years ago that Teresa has agreed to put behind them several times already. Of course we have the counterpoint over at Melissa and Joe’s, because Melissa has been tasked with fighting Teresa’s battles.
Teresa gets to remove her anklet bracelet. I am so tired of seeing Teresa’s ass in the air. I’m also annoyed that all of Teresa’s furniture is still in her house. Crime does pay.
(Photo by: Tommy Garcia/Bravo)
It’s time for more of The Glamorous Life of Crime starring Teresa Giudice and friends. We start with the perils of having kid that can’t walk to the end of the driveway. Should I insert my stories of walking miles to the bus stop uphill in both directions through mounds of snow here? Teresa clearly blames Joe for her going to prison. She doesn’t take any responsibility for her physically walking in to banks telling the loan officer that she had fake jobs as a realtor and a bunch of other things with her own mouth and signature. Nope, it is all Joe’s fault. Despite her being charged with fraud counts that didn’t even include Joe. Or it is the bankruptcy lawyer’s fault. Teresa is the victim!
Jac arrives with coffee for Teresa and Teresa pretends she didn’t know she had a scene with her. Juicy doesn’t even pretend to have a job anymore. Teresa says she became a more forgiving person in prison. So they hug it out and decide to be friends. We will see how long this lasts. In other news, Teresa’s yoga obsession is really helping out in the bedroom. Teresa talks about prison dildos. Teresa tells us that she told Jac about the dildos because she knows Jac is kinky. I do not need to know any of this information.
Filed under Dolores Catania, Gia Giudice, Jacqueline Laurita, Joe Giudice, Joe Gorga, Kathy Wakile, Melissa Gorga, Real Housewives of New Jersey, RHONJ, Siggy Flicker, Teresa Giudice
(Photo by: Tommy Garcia/Bravo)
I need another day in this weekend! I have been in a weird headspace and my body just feels like it is slogging through mud in order to do anything at all. So this I going to be a slow recap night. It took me three days to get the latest RHOA tea up. It’s good. You really should check it out. Any why does Banjo need to go out at precisely 8 pm every night. At least he is regular I guess.
We start with Teresa’s suspect lawyer making a statement to the press outside her house. He has clearly worked himself in to a paid role. Is he the first male FOH? It would seem so. He had more airtime last week than the new fulltime housewives. Everyone pretends to watch this on the news from their phones at home. What we saw was Bravo filming it.
Jacqueline seems to cry. Then she sees the new Lexus SUV with a bow. She says, “Same old Teresa.” Exactly. What kind of idiot does that the second they are out of prison for robbing people? The Joe and Melissa stories are staged and filmed much later than we are supposed to believe. Melissa doesn’t understand that Teresa refused to let her visit because she didn’t want to be seen in her worst moments by an adversary. It’s one of those “Never let them see you cry” sort of things.
Filed under Dolores Catania, Entertainment News, Jacqueline Laurita, Joe Giudice, Joe Gorga, Kathy Wakile, Melissa Gorga, Real Housewives of New Jersey, RHONJ, Siggy Flicker, Teresa Giudice
Teresa Giudice was unable to keep her smile on during an interview with Mara Schiavocampo this morning. The RHONJ had to take a break just one minute into the interview. Mara began by asking about the girls.
Teresa said, ” “You know, [they] miss their dad, of course, tremendously, just like I do. But you know they’re doing as well as could be expected.”
Then she was asked about Joe. And despite the fact that Teresa has a memorized list of answers for all of these questions that she has rehearse many times, she couldn’t get through her response about Joe being locked up. It was very odd and not like Teresa at all. She started by saying they talk every day and they see each other every week. (Which is the opposite of what was said in this post.) Then she looks up at the ceiling of her living room like she heard a noise or something and then said she was becoming emotional and needed to take a break.
It’s me again!
I continue to be fascinated with Teresa Giudice’s “attorney” and his love of media attention. James Leonard particularly seems to like selling stories to People to answer questions that no one is asking. Today’s breaking story on People is entitled ” The Surprising Reason Teresa Giudice Can’t Visit Her Husband Joe In Prison More Frequently.” Which is a poor title not just because of the unnecessary length but because in fact, Teresa is allowed to visit Joe as frequently as she would like Despite tis fact, Leonard goes into great detail about why Teresa is not visiting more often while claiming that she goes every other weekend.
Here is a partial list of “reasons” why Teresa isn’t visiting more according to Leonard, “Where he is, you get a certain number of points every month and each visit counts as a point. Weekend visits are considered more points,” Leonard explains. “So because he also has his mother and sister coming to visit, and Teresa can’t go during the week because the girls are in school, they’re having to do it every other weekend.”
Except none of this is accurate.
Sorry, I have too much going on today to try to explain the RHONJ trailer with interpretive dance and sign language. I can’t grasp why Bravo guards AN ADVERTISEMENT for their show like gold and doesn’t make it embeddable for all. So I will do a bit of purple pen on the press release and call it a day.
NEW YORK – May 24, 2016 – There won’t be any lazy days of summer when Bravo Media’s “The Real Housewives of New Jersey,” returns for its much anticipated seventh season on Sunday, July 10 at 8pm ET/PT. Teresa Giudice and Melissa Gorga are joined by new Housewives, Dolores Catania and Siggy Flicker, along with the return of a true Jersey veteran, Jacqueline Laurita. Also appearing this season are sisters Kathy Wakile and Rosie Pierri.. Wait whut? What happened to the lesbian couple? They aren’t mentioned at all? I thought they were downgraded after the fight in Vermont (that was Jac’s fault) but no mention at all? So you can hit people all day long in Atlanta, but not Jac Laurita? If they were cut out, then why were they at the finale filming that Jac refused to show up for?