(Photo by: Tommy Garcia/Bravo)
It’s time for more of The Glamorous Life of Crime starring Teresa Giudice and friends. We start with the perils of having kid that can’t walk to the end of the driveway. Should I insert my stories of walking miles to the bus stop uphill in both directions through mounds of snow here? Teresa clearly blames Joe for her going to prison. She doesn’t take any responsibility for her physically walking in to banks telling the loan officer that she had fake jobs as a realtor and a bunch of other things with her own mouth and signature. Nope, it is all Joe’s fault. Despite her being charged with fraud counts that didn’t even include Joe. Or it is the bankruptcy lawyer’s fault. Teresa is the victim!
Jac arrives with coffee for Teresa and Teresa pretends she didn’t know she had a scene with her. Juicy doesn’t even pretend to have a job anymore. Teresa says she became a more forgiving person in prison. So they hug it out and decide to be friends. We will see how long this lasts. In other news, Teresa’s yoga obsession is really helping out in the bedroom. Teresa talks about prison dildos. Teresa tells us that she told Jac about the dildos because she knows Jac is kinky. I do not need to know any of this information.
Filed under Dolores Catania, Gia Giudice, Jacqueline Laurita, Joe Giudice, Joe Gorga, Kathy Wakile, Melissa Gorga, Real Housewives of New Jersey, RHONJ, Siggy Flicker, Teresa Giudice
(Photo by: Tommy Garcia/Bravo)
I need another day in this weekend! I have been in a weird headspace and my body just feels like it is slogging through mud in order to do anything at all. So this I going to be a slow recap night. It took me three days to get the latest RHOA tea up. It’s good. You really should check it out. Any why does Banjo need to go out at precisely 8 pm every night. At least he is regular I guess.
We start with Teresa’s suspect lawyer making a statement to the press outside her house. He has clearly worked himself in to a paid role. Is he the first male FOH? It would seem so. He had more airtime last week than the new fulltime housewives. Everyone pretends to watch this on the news from their phones at home. What we saw was Bravo filming it.
Jacqueline seems to cry. Then she sees the new Lexus SUV with a bow. She says, “Same old Teresa.” Exactly. What kind of idiot does that the second they are out of prison for robbing people? The Joe and Melissa stories are staged and filmed much later than we are supposed to believe. Melissa doesn’t understand that Teresa refused to let her visit because she didn’t want to be seen in her worst moments by an adversary. It’s one of those “Never let them see you cry” sort of things.
Filed under Dolores Catania, Entertainment News, Jacqueline Laurita, Joe Giudice, Joe Gorga, Kathy Wakile, Melissa Gorga, Real Housewives of New Jersey, RHONJ, Siggy Flicker, Teresa Giudice
Pictured: (l-r) Dolores Catania, Siggy Flicker, Teresa Giudice, Melissa Gorga, Jacqueline Laurita — (Photo by: Tommy Garcia/Bravo)
Well the time has finally come for the return of the recently released Felon by Bravo to make her joyous return to the ginormous house built from fraudulent funds. To Teresa it all seems like a bad dream, something horrible that happened to her through no fault of her own. We begin with the car ride from the prison. She is driven home by her really interesting celebrity lawyer. He’s been stuck to this family like glue since January of 2015 as if he has no other clients. It looks like we will have to wait for the reuniting to be seen though because filming started and we first have to use the footage that was shot without her.
I am in the minority in that I like Melissa Gorga and Joe. They haven’t been convicted of anything yet, they are not being investigated by the Feds that I know of, and they don’t have any health related storylines. Frankly, that’s about all I can hope for at this point. So I will tolerate the scenes of her opening “her” new boutique. I believe she has invested in that about as much as she invested in that weird garbage truck business with the shady guy who went to jail. Her storyline this season is that Joe doesn’t want Teresa to work.
I liked the scene at the kid’s baseball game. Joe is worried that Teresa won’t want to come to their house for Christmas. He’s also worried that she won’t be able to because of her house arrest. Melissa is worried about Teresa coming because Teresa would not put her on her contact or visitation list. They haven’t had any contact since Teresa went to prison.
Sweet baby Jesus! Joe got fully undressed, took a shower and put on new clothes with cameras on him the entire time.
Not really my store….allegedly…
So it looks like we won’t see the dramatic heart wrenching reunion of Teresa with the family union the third or so episode to give her time to decompress from federal prison.
It will be the Melissa and Joe Gorga show for a bit. And I don’t have a problem with that. But what I do have a problem with is that Jac is shoving her autistic son in front of the cameras within the first ten minutes of episode one.
We all knew Teresa and Joe Giuidice were criminals when they were paying for things on their doorstep with wads of cash. They are paying their debt to society even though they are still flashing the benefits of their criminal activity. Continue reading
Sorry, I have too much going on today to try to explain the RHONJ trailer with interpretive dance and sign language. I can’t grasp why Bravo guards AN ADVERTISEMENT for their show like gold and doesn’t make it embeddable for all. So I will do a bit of purple pen on the press release and call it a day.
NEW YORK – May 24, 2016 – There won’t be any lazy days of summer when Bravo Media’s “The Real Housewives of New Jersey,” returns for its much anticipated seventh season on Sunday, July 10 at 8pm ET/PT. Teresa Giudice and Melissa Gorga are joined by new Housewives, Dolores Catania and Siggy Flicker, along with the return of a true Jersey veteran, Jacqueline Laurita. Also appearing this season are sisters Kathy Wakile and Rosie Pierri.. Wait whut? What happened to the lesbian couple? They aren’t mentioned at all? I thought they were downgraded after the fight in Vermont (that was Jac’s fault) but no mention at all? So you can hit people all day long in Atlanta, but not Jac Laurita? If they were cut out, then why were they at the finale filming that Jac refused to show up for?
Last night, the RHONJ finale was filmed a Macauso’s catering hall in Hawthorne, NJ. The pretense of the gathering, where the women are supposed to attempt to resolve all of the storylines was …… wait for it! …… a fashion show. But it was not a Posche fashion show a the Brownstone. This year, there is a new boutique owner in town. Remember when Teresa almost violated probation trying to make it home by curfew after filming the opening of Melissa Gorga’s new shop, Envy? Well, Envy Fashion Show is the new Posche Fashion Show.
Teresa was of course there as required to support her sister-in-law, Melissa. Those two have formed a surprisingly tight alliance in season seven. All the newbies were there including Robyn Levy and her wife Christina Flores, Siggy Flicker, and Dolores Catania.
According to Vicki Hyman of NJ.Com, “The event was open to the public, but tickets were $85.39 for standing-room only to $370.24 for the VIP experience, which included a front row seat, a photo with “Real Housewives” stars, an open bar, dinner and gift bag.”
And in true RHONJ um…. fashion, no storylines were resolved and one returning housewife committed a major production no no and refused to film. In case you had not heard the bad news, Jaqueline Laurita is back on RHONJ, according my sources she is a full housewife. Or she was. She may now be bumped down to a friend since her tantrum last night. Continue reading