I’m so excited. I am have a few technical issues but I am up and running with some twine and duct tape! I loved all the openings. I’m going to let you guys capture them for me in comments if you don’t mind because I know this is going to be a hard one to recap quickly. Thanks in advance!
Kyle is getting ready for the white party! YAY! This year it comes first which is weird because no one can be disinvited at the door for being a litigious cuntsicle! #Taylor. I’ve seen this Justin guy before. Didn’t he help some housewives dress as drag queens or for the Gay Pride Parade or something? I’m not kidding. The White Party has gotten huge and now has a major budget. Kyle is still trying to push a reluctant Sophia into modeling. She is tall and gorgeous but she’s never liked modeling or being on the show.
Kyle claims she has not seen Lisa Vanderpump since the reunion. From here on out I will call Lisa Vanderpump “Pump” and Lisa Rinna “Lisa.”
Brandi and Yolanda are going for a fitness walk. David plays the piano for us low lives. We are not worthy. Brandi is still up Yolanda’s butt. Which explains why Pump was cool towards her on WWHL. OMG. Yo has a swatter on her property who has set up a little beachside dress shop right on the highway/right of way for PCH. (wait for someone to correct me) She asks if he knows she is on her property and he is laying back playing on his phone saying ” No Mon, I did not know.” lol. He’s so chill. Hell I thought they were going for a walk on the beach why are the out on the highway? They finally find the beach. Yo tries to explain to Brandi about being connected to the earth. She didn’t get it. Yo talks about Gigi’s success. She really has hit the big time. Brandi mentions she is homeless (AGAIN) and tries to move in. The house she is talking about moving in now, I think she got tossed out of that too. Brandi starts trashing Pump. Yo tries to get Brandi to connect with nature again. It doesn’t work. Sad. Continue reading
Filed under Adrienne Maloof, Brandi Glanville, Camille Grammer, David Foster, Dimitri Charalambopoulos, Eileen Davidson, Kim Richards, Kyle Richards, Lisa Rinna, Lisa Vanderpump, Mauricio Umansky, Mohamed Hadid, Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, RHOBH, Taylor Armstrong, Yolanda Foster
Cody Simpson, the 17-year-old crooner from down under, may have been prematurely booted from #DWTS last night, but he’s riding high today, releasing his Surfboard video in the wake of his DWTS publicity. His 19-year-old cradle robbing girlfriend Gigi Hadid stars in the sexy but not raunchy video set mainly on the beach. Continue reading
Reunions are super hard to recap. I am going to try to avoid transcribing and just share some random thoughts on the over all fights. We start with the whole Puerto Rico situation. Everyone says that it was hard to relive the Puerto Rico. Brandi says that she and Lisa have not spoken since Puerto Rico but that she did send Lisa a mean email.
Lisa points out that Brandi is all over the internet saying that Lisa used to live deep in the valley and filed for bankruptcy neither of which are true. Brandi’s reaction is to turn to Kyle for backup. Lisa says she has never lived in Calabasas. She moved from France to Beverly Park. Brandi paid $9.99 to look it up on an Internet site and so she knows Lisa lived there! Brandi is insane. Lisa mentions that they have owned many properties over the years. I can’t believe how long Brandi wants to argue that Lisa lived somewhere she did not. Good Grief.
Next up. Yolanda pretends that her issue with Lisa is that she did not visit her enough while she was ill. Which is bullshit. I am bored already. Yolanda expects her friends there when she wants to fingerpaint for her college aged daughter. I can’t.
They played pretty much every ridiculous scene Kim was in all at once. It was a whole lot of crazy. Kyle and Kim are close. This is incredibly boring. I literally keep zoning out. There is really no need to talk about Kim this much. Continue reading
Filed under Brandi Glanville, Carlton Gebbia, David Foster, Joyce Giraud, Joyce Giraud de Ohoven, Ken Todd, Kim Richards, Kyle Richards, Lisa Vanderpump, Mauricio Umansky, Mohamed Hadid, Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, RHOBH, Yolanda Foster
Say it isn’t so! Is it possible that David Foster is losing interest in his fourth wife so soon? The seemingly perfect couple married on November 11, 2011 (The same day Kim Zolciak married Kroy Biermann) how is it possible that the bloom is already off the lemon blossom? Could it be that David feels like he married a lemon after Yolanda was diagnosed with “chronic lyme disease” with in a year of their marriage? Is it the curse of the Real Housewives Franchise? What is going on here? Well, for one thing they are frantically liquidating their assets!
Remember this little guessing game I like to play with you guys that infuriates you because I never give the answers? It was a video of a beautiful apartment for sale in coast in British Columbia for a mere 5 million dollars? I actively campaigned for someone to hit the donate button for with a five million dollar contribution, but sadly no one bit. Anyway, that was David’s Canadian apartment. I haven’t check to see if it sold, but the point is they were trying to unload it. That was in July of 2013, a mere 20 months after their happy union. Continue reading
I know we have all been verklempt over Swan Gate 2013 and I have been sleuthing away trying to get to the bottom of the story. Here is what I have pieced together from reading Mohammad and Lisa’s Twitterlines. Sometime prior to December 15th, Mohammad gave Lisa her Christmas present early. His gift was a pair of swans for Lisa’s cement pond. Everything was going very well, until one of the young swans looked at the other and took off. See, swans mate for life and well, this was apparently an arranged marriage and one swan was not fond of her pre-chosen life partner. Or so it would seem.
Lisa was beside herself and Mohammad and Ken pulled off a solution to the problem. Mohammad bought another swan and Ken told Lisa that the swan with the cold feet returned. Problem solved! But I think Ken, who had a car accident in the middle of Swan Gate 2013, cracked under Lisa’s interrogations and admitted the returning swan was actually a new swan. At any rate, the new swan seems much or taken with her partner and the prognosis for a long and happy future seems great. Meanwhile, the runaway bride swan, is probably still out there somewhere looking for her proper life partner. The end. Continue reading