Say it isn’t so! Is it possible that David Foster is losing interest in his fourth wife so soon? The seemingly perfect couple married on November 11, 2011 (The same day Kim Zolciak married Kroy Biermann) how is it possible that the bloom is already off the lemon blossom? Could it be that David feels like he married a lemon after Yolanda was diagnosed with “chronic lyme disease” with in a year of their marriage? Is it the curse of the Real Housewives Franchise? What is going on here? Well, for one thing they are frantically liquidating their assets!
Remember this little guessing game I like to play with you guys that infuriates you because I never give the answers? It was a video of a beautiful apartment for sale in coast in British Columbia for a mere 5 million dollars? I actively campaigned for someone to hit the donate button for with a five million dollar contribution, but sadly no one bit. Anyway, that was David’s Canadian apartment. I haven’t check to see if it sold, but the point is they were trying to unload it. That was in July of 2013, a mere 20 months after their happy union. Continue reading
We begin with Brandi Glanville talking with a group of friends in order to research for her next book, which apparently is about her vagina. I’m gonna pass on this discussion.
Joyce is such a happy person. She’s packing for Palm Springs. Kim is shopping for Palm Springs. Kyle and Carlton are also shopping for new clothes. Well Kyle is shopping and Carlton is sucking the life out of the experience. Carlton has a list of grievances she airs on the shopping trip. Kyle says there is a Mexican expression for Carlton’s list of grievances. She says “she is looking for tits on an ant.” I like this expression. Kim has packed everything but the kitchen sink, including her own juicer. This trip is “planned by Joyce.”
There is the usual bickering about who gets what room. Which I will never understand. And Yolanda is disappointed that the sheets are not ironed. What? She did not bring her personal assistant in charge of sheet ironing? How will she survive 2 whole nights at a beautiful resort with unironed sheets? The horror! And apparently, the ladies had no idea Palm Springs is hot.
Brandi keeps calling Joyce, “Jacqueline.” Around the pool everyone pretends to be shy of their anorexia. Carlton has sever Wiccan tattoos. Kim’s talking heads are adorbs. Brandi brings up kissing Carlton AGAIN. And these grown woman behave like 10 year olds. Now everyone is pressuring Joyce to get in the pool. Why? It seems they think that because she is hosting the pool party she MUST get in the pool first. Is this a Dutch thing because Yolanda is the ring leader of this one. Yo says that Joyce can’t swim. Joyce says you are right, I can’t swim and Brandi says….wait for it…..
Filed under Brandi Glanville, Carlton Gebbia, Joyce Giraud, Joyce Giraud de Ohoven, Kim Richards, Kyle Richards, Lisa Vanderpump, Mauricio Umansky, Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, RHOBH, Yolanda Foster
Oh um, hi. Sorry. I was totally mesmerized by Yolanda Foster’s home and infinity pool. I totally had to sit there and gawk at the view. Yolanda’s brother and mother have flown in from Holland for the reveal of David Foster’s star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame!
The editing on RHOBH makes recapping a PITA. You get a tiny little clip of nothing from Brandi, and a tiny little clip of nothing from Kyle…. Basically, everyone has dogs and everyone is discussing whether or not Mauricio is a dog. Well, everyone except Carlton. Carlton is a witch, so she has a black cat, who she is taking in for acupuncture treatments.
Kyle and Joyce go to get weirdo Beverly Hills facials. Joyce wants to take everyone to Palm Springs but she is a bit wary of Lisa. Continue reading
Filed under Brandi Glanville, Carlton Gebbia, David Foster, Joyce Giraud, Joyce Giraud de Ohoven, Kim Richards, Kyle Richards, Lisa Vanderpump, Mauricio Umansky, Mohamed Hadid, Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, RHOBH, Yolanda Foster
Brandi wants to dump JR now that she got the house she wanted. She is having this conversation with Jennifer in the bathroom as she runs her bath. She made sure to flash her entire ass at the cameraman which I thought was a bit too…um “cheeky” and then she strips naked and gets into the tub with a full camera crew in her bathroom! Sigh.
Joyce runs a pageant called Queen of the Universe. I wonder how Trump feels about a former Miss Universe naming her pageant that? She has two adorable little boys and they have a mini putting green in their back yard. How cute. Will they be the next Tiger Woods?
As much as I want to call Carlton Morticia and violate my own rule against stupid names, I won’t. Carlton is planning a luncheon at her home for the ladies.
Yolanda is receiving daily in home visits from a holistic nurse. Gigi is leaving at the end of the summer to go to school in NYC. That should be a great place for her modeling career as well. She is studying criminal psychology. I wish I had focused my undergrad on that rather than general psychology.
JR seems like a nice guy, who is about to be blindsided. He is trying to be nice. But Brandi is pissed that he went on a couples trip to Texas without inviting her or even telling her. She seems like she is trying to dump him before he dumps her. Continue reading
Filed under Carlton Gebbia, David Foster, Joyce Giraud, Joyce Giraud de Ohoven, Kim Richards, Kyle Richards, Lisa Vanderpump, Mauricio Umansky, Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, RHOBH, Yolanda Foster