We begin tonight’s episode of the Real Housewives of Atlanta at the J Spot! Girl, Miss Lawrence sure did get lucky with Bravo. He has been promoting his salon and hair services for many seasons and they frequently film at his store. Then he lands Fashion Queens?! He’s probably making more coin than some of the actual housewives! Tonight Marlo is in the salon getting her weave ironed. I cannot believe Bravo let our favorite felon back on the show. But lately, there are almost more people with federal charges pending than housewives with a clear record! I wonder if this is before or after the event where Nene tried to get Marlo arrested for assault? I sure hope they air that scene before the season ends! Nene was throwing a flinger!
Anyway, tonight Kenya is hosting a charity ball and Marlo is invited. The two ladies meet up at the J-Spot to have some girl talk. Kenya tells Miss Lawrence and Marlo the scoop on pajama brawl. They discuss their previous battles with Nene, and Kenya explains she is going to hold a fancy charity ball to raise money for Nene’s Favorite charity in order to get back in her good graces. Does Kenya not know that Nene’s favorite charity is Nene’s Louboutin Fund? I think she overestimates Nene’s ability to be charitable. I’m just saying.
Kandi is holding auditions for her play which by all accounts did very well on it’s Atlanta run despite the hilarious things we have seen in the casting call scenes. I assure you, most of those people do not represent the talent that Atlanta has to offer. It’s time for Porsha’s audition for the role of Kandi’s character’s younger sister, Jada. Porsha could not be bothered to memorize her lines, nor could she be arsed to cold read them as written. Her voice was up about three octaves and she spoke in a valley girl voice. She sang “His Eye is On the Sparrow” in a way over the top way. However, I think with a little coaching from Kandi, she would be alright in this small role. Continue reading
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It’s been two weeks since the last episode of Real Housewives of Atlanta, and when last we left the ghetto peaches their men were brawling in their underwear. Tonight, we resume and it is the womens’ turn to try and turn things up. Please note, I will not be referencing Chuck Smith, AKA Big Homie in his own mind, at all during this scene as he will remain ensconced between the fireplace and his wife’s coat tails for the entire drama.
We begin with Phaedra continuously repeating “we need to leave” despite the fact that absolutely no one, and surely not Apollo is paying her the least bit of attention. Once again, Kenya speaks the truth in her talking head. Nene started all of this with her shit stirring questions and now that everything went left she is trying to wash her hands of the whole situation. Nene makes a dramatic and illiterate announcement, “This ain’t about gettin’ all crunk with no fisteses and stuff!” Porsha tells her sister “we ain’t sign up for no shit like that!” and they leave. It seems like Porsha is going to stroll through the lobby of the Intercontinental in a bright orange bra and panty set and a very see through white dress.
Christopher Williams and Nene seem to be on the same
drugs page and are hugging it out. Natalie’s face indicates that she is not thrilled her man is in a very long embrace with a half-nekkid woman in mullet lingerie. Christopher decides the best thing to do is make another announcement. He says, ” You have to be a strange person to walk up to somebody and tell them (approaches Nene) I know Gregg better than you….” His thoughts are so disjointed I am not even going to recap them. It seems like an attempt to get on his wife’s/girlfriend’s? good side. He accuses Kenya of being “on molly” (ecstasy). Well, KENYA didn’t appear to be on anything but now I have a good idea what he and perhaps a couple of others were on. I mean what’s a “pillow talk” party without some X? Thanks for spilling your own tea there, Christopher. Continue reading
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I’m so excited to see Dwight back on my TV on tonight’s episode of Real Housewives of Atlanta! Phaedra is planning a “blessing” or an “inauguration” for Mr. President. She sold the story to the tabloids as a “traditional African naming ceremony.” Whatever she calls it, it can’t possibly be as offensive as Ayden’s televised fiasco. At least she is not doing whatever this is in a church. She has rented a house for the party. Why not just have it in her house? I guess because of the renovations. Phaedra is in full put on mode. It’s a presidential theme, natch. You know, just like all the other traditional African naming ceremonies you’ve been to. Red, White and Blue champagne?
Cynthia is telling Peter about the dinner with all of the girls the other night. Cynthia is a bit irritated with Kandi for saying that Peter has a past. I really didn’t think it was a big deal or that Kandi meant anything by it. She just said we all have a past and that doesn’t necessarily dictate the future. Well, unless we are talking about Apollo. Allegedly. Cynthia is telling Peter this because they are planning to go to a couples pajama party at Nene’s and she wants him to be up to speed. But really, this is just going to make Peter go after Kandi at the party.
Kenya is still pretending to be trying to have a baby. I’m not sure these scenes even need to be recapped. Basically the doctor tells her that her eggs are still too damn old. Um, duh.
Kandi and Todd and Don Juan are talking about casting for the play. Don Juan is throwing shade about Porsha singing in the play. Kandi has confidence in Porsha. Did any of y’all go see the play? Todd brings up Christopher Williams and Kandi gives him the side eye. Don Juan knows what is coming and excuses himself. Then Kandi tells Todd about Christopher’s wife, Natalie, calling him an opportunist. Todd is not feeling a pajama party.
More Kenya silliness. Kenya and Miss Lawrence try to pick up a sperm donor at the sperm bank. Continue reading
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Kandi looks awesome on Bethenny. And for my ring checking commenter, I looked, she is wearing her ring. Bethenny says that Kandi is sassier the season. Kandi says she wasn’t trying to be, it just seemed like people were coming at her for some reason. Bethenny asked why she thinks that is. Kandi says when she looks at it, it seems all the new people on the show had something to say about her and her relationship. Bethenny says that’s ridiculous because they are the ones who know you the least. Kandi said at the time it seemed like a conspiracy that they were bringing two people on the show that knew either her or Todd fifteen years ago. It’s not a conspiracy, Kandi. It’s a storyline. Bethenny mocks Kenya and says, “they are coming for you and you did not send for them!”
Bethenny asks who this new girl is and where she came from, referring to Natalie. Kandi says she is a girl who is married or might be married to Christopher Williams. Bethenny doesn’t know Christopher. Bethenny asks how Kandi and Todd deal with the drama. Kandi says Todd is super easy going and doesn’t let the TV stuff interfere. It’s just all about them. Kandi says their relationship is good. Todd wishes that his relationship was better with Mama Joyce because they do not talk at all. She will not talk to him or come around him. Continue reading
Sorry for the delay y’all. I’m in a narcoleptic phase and I just hit the wall last night with the RHOA post. Blood Sweat and Heels will be up shortly. But first I am dying to see this episode of WWHL.
Nene and Phaedra are there in the audience. Nene has been in NYC this week for some reason. Phaedra has to go with Apollo to keep him from cheating, I assume. Also, Todd’s mom is there. Why? And Andy’s beard is gone.
The poll question is who would you rather out of the men?
Andy asks Todd what his reaction was to seeing all the drama about him? Todd says it was a little tough. Todd says he has always been cool with Christopher and Natalie. He says he dated Natalie’s friend in high school and they later reconnected in their twenties and neither one of them had anything.
Next we revisit the Apollo and Kenya sexting scandal that never happened AGAIN. Apollo says that he loves his wife, and then repeats the foot in his mouth comment that Peter told him never to say! He says he loves his wife and he would never step outside of his marriage, but if he wanted to he could have. Oh Apollo. Continue reading
Carlos King posted this on his instagram to tease tonight’s episode
It’s time for another episode of the Real Housewives of Atlanta! I’ve been doing some technical blog maintenance on the all day today and I’m excited to get another recap going! Let’s see what the ladies have in store for us tonight! I haven’t even watched the first looks yet, so I am looking forward to every bit of tonight’s episode!
Can you believe it has been three years since Cynthia and Peter got married? Lord, we waste a lot of our lives watching this shit. I am so glad to know you guys are doing it with me. It makes me feel less ridiculous about my television view habits. But really, Cynthia and Peter have been married longer than I’ve had this blog! #holdme
Cynthia and Peter are at Bar One. It will be interesting to see if they follow the extensive (23!!!) list of rules for customers of Bar One. So far they don’t even have a table and had to ask for a server. Cynthia orders a Vodka pineapple (no top shelf vodka mentioned on camera) and Peter orders a Ketel One and tonic with two limes. As the reviews state, the server barely seems interested in fetching a drink despite being miced and serving the owners. They are meeting their friends Christopher Williams and his wife Natalie. Jeez it’s another Cynthia and Peter do not have sex story. They are setting this up for Natalie being a friend of the housewives.
Natalie claims to have known Todd and says her good friend dated him. She says her good friend dated him and he broke her heart by cheating on her. She says, “Todd had a straight hustle, don’t ever get that twisted.” I wonder how Todd feels about Bravo production, his FRIENDS selling his ass out for storyline. This is so fabricated it is not even the slightest bit amusing. Natalie claims Todd is an opportunist.Peter and Cynthia go across the street to her modeling agency and Peter has candles burning everywhere and Christopher Williams sings a special song just for Cynthia. It was sweet. Then Peter and Cynthia have a romantic dinner alone at the modeling agency. Continue reading
Filed under Apollo Nida, Bravo, Cynthia Bailey, Filming Real Housewives of Atlanta, Gregg Leakes, Kandi Burruss, Kenya Moore, Kordell Stewart, Marlo Hampton, NeNe Leakes, Peter Thomas, Phaedra Parks, Porsha Stewart, Real Housewives of Atlanta, RHOA, Todd Tucker
I’ve already discussed the first few scenes of this episode, here. Phaedra and Kandi snark on Chuck. And Mallory seems to have an ulterior motive for showing up. It is not “mending fences” as she says, it’s more like running Peter out of Cynthia’s life.
Mostly, I actually feel sorry for Kenya. Whether her dad really is this critical or just doing it on national TV because it is in the script, he is just awful. I’m no Kenya fan, but I am starting to feel some compassion for her based on the crappy hand she was dealt in the parents department.
Porsha met with her divorce lawyer to discuss the fact that they were unable to mediate and will be letting the judge decide the settlement. I thought it was funny that the attorney actually pointed out to her that she would need to pay them from her settlement. Continue reading
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Phaedra stops by to see Kandi who is a bit confused how Phaedra and Nene became on good terms again. Well, Kandi, let me explain it to you, it’s called Nene needs a storyline. Carry on. Phaedra calls Chuck a light-skinned Frankenstein and they refer to his package as a cocktail weenie and a bite sized brownie. Phaedra throws out a comment about how hot her husband is despite the fact that the two appear to loathe each other.
In the scene with Cynthia, Peter and Mallory , Peter and Cynthia accept ownership for their part in the Mallory debacle, yet Mallory seems to be the one stirring the shit and once again hinting to Peter about martial secrets that Cynthia has shared with her. Mallory seems to be on a mission to get rid of Peter, for good. Perhaps that is her master plan.
Kenya’s dad arrives for a visit and she picks him up at the airport. The first thing he does is make fun of her “ugly, ashy, feet.” This is all before they pull away from the airport. Kenya says she lives in “The Vinings” which I hope is a subdivision far away on the other side of town and not Vinings which is a lovely town that I could through a rock at from my ghetto. As soon as he gets to her house, he hates everything. He hates her décor, and the hardwood floors and the contents of her refrigerator. Despite her dad being a total jerk, Kenya tries to have a conversation with him about her mother. Continue reading
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By now it’s clear to pretty much everyone that these reality shows are not based in reality. But we watch anyway because sometimes, people get very comfortable on camera and begin to reveal their true selves. Often when that happens, they start to blame production and scream that they were edited to look foolish. The thing is though, production can only edit what you give them. They can put words in your mouth using frankenbites, but those are pretty easy to notice because they don’t show your lips moving when you “say” those things.
So, Mama Joyce, if you make your daughter cry by constantly insulting her fiancé and her engagement ring and her home décor, you can’t really cry wolf later and blame it on editing. You chose to speak those words on camera. You chose to go all ham in the bridal shop and threaten to clobber someone upside their head with a shoe. You scared a small child with your mere presence and went to your daughter’s best friend’s office to film a scene talking about your short big-headed child and how she should not many that short big-headed man. You never filmed a scene all season where you showed any sort of class, or the slightest bit of consideration for your daughter.
So now you want to rewrite a bit of history Mama Joyce? Really? Continue reading
Okay, I have about ten shows I want to be watching all at once, but let me get to recapping RHOA first and foremost. I can’t believe this show pulls close to four million viewers a week. And Nene has not had much of a presence at all this season. Now she has been relegated to “being in charge of a road trip.” That sort of task is usually assigned to the most boring person on the show!
Did Cynthia move? I don’t remember her house being this nice. Kandi goes to Cynthia to tell her about the bridal beatdown her mother and aunts put on Carmon. I don’t think the Mama Joyce thing is all storyline. Kandi broke down on WWHL talking about her mama and how they are not currently speaking. Kandi doesn’t seem like the fake crying type. I am buying into this whole scene. And it’s really sad. Kandi says she might just do something small for her wedding. Like getting married in Mexico? Cynthia basically tells Kandi that if she doesn’t get a grip on her mother, she will lose Todd.
Oh Lord, Mama Joyce has arrived to Phaedra’s office. Phaedra is there with Ayden. Ayden is not acknowledging Mama Joyce. Phaedra whispers to him that he needs to speak to Mama Joyce if he wants a treat. Ayden whispers back, “I don’t want a treat.” And I am officially in love with Ayden. Mama Joyce says she is there for legal advice. She wants to ask about a prenup. Phaedra says she has a prenup and Kandi will have one too. Mama Joyce says Todd is refusing to sign a prenup. That is horseshit. Todd just said he was not agreeing to anything with Mama Joyce. He said it in a nice way leaving out the whole “this is none of your fucking business” portion that he and the rest of the free world were thinking. Phaedra tells Mama Joyce that Kandi has a will and that Mama Joyce will be taken care of. Continue reading
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Carmon who is Kandi’s never before mentioned BFF and personal assistant arrives at Chez Kandi to find Kandi conveniently looking at bridal “books” and thinking about wedding dress shopping. She seems to think her mother is coming around on Kandi and Todd’s marriage.
Kandi has more framed pictures and art on the wall than most museums. I like it! Todd tries to tell Kandi to stand up to her mother like an adult. No need to be disrespectful to her mother, but she can’t let her mother be disrespectful to Todd.
Nene, Gregg and Brentt go over to Mynique Smith’s house. Mynique is a new “friend of a housewife” this season. She was brought in to give Nene someone to play with because Nene’s “Hollywood” storyline fell through after The New Normal was cancelled and her role on Glee is rarely recurring anymore. He husband is a retired NFL player, Chuck Smith. Chuck was a groomsman in Nene’s second marriage. Nene claims she grew up with Chuck in Athens. Chuck admits to dating Kandi but not Phaedra. When did he date Kandi? Nene, who has sworn up and down she did NOT know Phaedra when they were in Athens, not claims that Phaedra had a bad reputation in Athens. She says Phaedra was known as a “head doctor.” Nene is the kind of friend who will bring you on national television with your wife and immediately start an interrogation on who you have or have not slept with. Isn’t that lovely? Continue reading
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