Here is a post for my 41 favorite commenters, the ones that read my Marriage Boot Camp: Reality Stars recaps. You many remember on last Friday’s episode, Tanisha got a all the parts she ever wanted in all the shows there ever were! I told you at the time, “These phone calls with Tanisha give me the distinct impression there is no one on the other end of the phone. First she says she auditioned for something and they said she is “pretty much hired.” Then she tells the group she auditioned for a lot of stuff and got it all. Never once did she say what this role, or all of the roles are. It’s all fake.” Continue reading
Category Archives: Reality Show
I am super late with this recap, but I’ve been busy and sick. I’ve felt like crap for days and finally diagnosed myself with Fresh Ripe Cherry Overdose FRCO. Shut up! I looked on the Internet and it’s a thing. I am overly cranky. I also may have just eaten a dog quesadilla. I feel like I am about to give birth to Rosemary’s baby. So this show better bring the funny, or there will be hell to pay.
On this episode, Leah’s mother wants a tramp stamp. My first reaction was I wonder how much money Leah offered her mother to get a tramp stamp. Leah’s mom says she has no problem with it being called a tramp stamp because she was a tramp when she was young. You go, Leah’s mom! It’s going down. The 64-year-old had a vision for her tattoo during one of her hot flashes. Wait, what? This shit is still going to be happening when I am 64? I thought my doctor said the sentence was 8-10 years? Why isn’t this bitch fat? 64 and still having hot flashes? Kill me now.
The tattoo is huge. It is the head of a jaguar with a woman carrying a jug of water on top. Because, she likes jaguars and she was born under the sign of Aquarius. The head of the woman is between the eyes of the jaguar head. Continue reading
It’s time for the penultimate episode of this ridiculousness. Roger caved and went with Jenni to her event. Tanisha gets a phone call from her manager saying she got a part. She is screaming and crying and Clive asks her what is going on. She walks right past him and says nothing. So this whole communication workshop stuff is going well. She goes out to the kitchen to tell everyone the good news. These phone calls with Tanisha give me the distinct impression there is no one on the other end of the phone. First she says she auditioned for something and they said she is “pretty much hired.” Then she tells the group she auditioned for a lot of stuff and got it all. Never once did she say what this role, or all of the roles are. It’s all fake.
Speaking of fake, Gretchen and Slade bicker in bed. Slade is emotionally exhausted.
The stupid exercise of the week is called Release Me. They are supposed to think of the person for whom they have the most resentment. Slade says his resentment is toward God. He is angry that God let his son have brain cancer. He gives a crappy performance of crying and whining.
Tanisha is up next. Her resentment is her “caretaker” that abused her as a child. Tanisha sort of freaks out. She wants to hit the girl pretending to be the caretaker. She actually asks Clive for support! Jim steps in as the caretaker in case Tanisha does decide to knock a bitch out. Jim provokes Tanisha to hit her. Tanisha is melting down. Jim asks who is forgiveness for and the female therapist whispers, “Yooooou, it’s for you sweetie…” in the most hysterical way possible I don’t see how Gretchen or someone did not just bust out laughing. Soap opera music swells. Tanisha forgives! Continue reading
Here is Bravo’s latest press release regarding their upcoming shows. Is it me are they really pumping out new programming like crazy these days? It seems like I read somewhere they are now in the number three slot among cable stations with advertising. That’s huge! It seems like they are throwing everything out there to see what sticks. The good news is all the boys from Million Dollar Listing New York will be back for another season. That’s not much of a surprise considering the episode with Fredrik’s wedding got an Emmy nomination recently. The franchise will increase with the addition of Million Dollar Listing San Francisco. I think San Fran is a great choice with some beautiful real estate for us to drool over.
A bit more surprising is the return of Southern Charm. I might even watch that series now that Thomas Ravenel is off the show. Ravenel is a former politician who already disgraced the fine state of South Carolina once when he was convicted of drug trafficking while holding a state office. Ravenel officially filed to run for U.S. Senate as an independent against two-term Republican incumbent Lindsay Graham. Good luck with that. #eyeroll
Once again the new shows look very promising. But we have learned not to get our hopes up. Game of Crowns anyone? Click through for all the details. Continue reading
Is this show over yet? I love having something to recap on a Friday night but I must admit this show is a bit, okay a lot, ridiculous. Yet, I can’t stop watching. The fact that I know almost all of these people from other shows makes it interesting. We pick up where we left off with Roger and JWow arguing about some leaked tabloid story. Roger tells Jenni she should have listened to him and kept her mouth shut. Roger who up until now was getting a somewhat decent edit is throwing a fucking tantrum about there being a camera guy and them being miked. Um, Roger, that is what you signed up for. The story is the one I suspected about Jenni being pregnant. Apparently, they had not told their family yet and they will be finding out from the media. I understand that is pretty crappy but so is Roger’s violent outburst around his pregnant wife. I really think this marriage is doomed.
The white Oprah has already figured out that Jenni is pregnant because she has not had a drop of alcohol since she entered the house. This of course left more for Traci’s breakfasts. Jenni and Roger are both furious. Roger is furious with Jenni and Jenni is furious with the house. Jenni says the person attempting to sell the story is someone in the house. Maybe another participant, or perhaps production. So far that point is unclear. No wait. Jenni is blaming production. I guess she told them to explain why she could not drink. The producer comes out (always a sign of good drama) and says he was only made aware of the medical condition 17 minutes ago. All sorts of production crew and the therapists come on camera to deny saying anything to anyone. They have not told either of their families because she is not that far along but Roger claims she has told several people “in the industry.” That is the exact sort of crap that pisses Roger off. Therapist Jim gets Roger to continue to participate in the next ridiculous exercise. Continue reading
NEW YORK – July 10, 2014 – Bravo Media, part of NBCUniversal Cable Entertainment, continues to be recognized for its high quality, original content as the network received four Primetime Emmy® Nominations from the Academy of Television Arts & Science for the 66th Annual Primetime Emmy Awards. Bravo’s Emmy-Award winning series “Top Chef” earned its eighth consecutive nomination in the “Outstanding Reality-Competition Program” category. “Million Dollar Listing New York” and “Flipping Out” received their first Emmy nominations in the new category of “Outstanding Unstructured Reality Program.” In addition, the Emmy-Award winning series “Inside the Actors Studio,” hosted by James Lipton, was nominated for its 17th Primetime Emmy, this year for “Outstanding Informational Series or Special” category.
Time to head back into Marriage Boot Camp and check in on the media whores. We left with Roger and Jwoww at odds and Roger claiming that Jenn is just there for the paycheck and doesn’t want the therapy. Um, Roger, everyone in that house is just there for the paycheck and doesn’t want the therapy, except you. You married a famewhore. This is what famewhores do. How is this possibly news to you? Roger has a tantrum, and Jenni gets a stern talking to by the guy counselor to “keep it 100% real.” Which is exactly what the scrip writers wrote for him to say.
I find the counselors round table scenes at the beginning to be rather stupid.
But perhaps not as stupid as the activities. In this episode the ridiculousness continues. Didn’t we just do the insult your partners thing? The partners face each other and rattle off how their spouse is not meeting their needs. Gretchen needs Slade to get a job. When Slade tries to “act” his one reaction is to swallow hard. It’s odd. Trista needs Ryan to trust her. Ryan needs more physical contact. Or physical contact that seems genuine. Tanisha needs Clive to take control. Clive says he needs for her to let him run things. Tanisha says she has not been in love with him in a long time. Those two argued the longest, so far. Roger needs honesty from Jenni. The male counselor stops Roger from going on for some unknown reason. Later in an interview, Roger is still pissed about this. Jenni wants flowers, a hug, a kiss, some romance. Continue reading
If you missed Part One of this shit show, go here now. The comments were insane and it’s only going to get worse tonight. By the way, I was sent a reviewers copy of a new book out about Kate. It’s called Kate Gosselin: How She Fooled The World by Robert Hoffman. EDIT TO LINK TO CORRECT BOOK LINK. I would not have bought the book, mostly because I don’t have a reader for online books, and I didn’t think I would want to know anything else about Kate Gosselin, but OH I AM SO GLAD I GOT THIS BOOK. I have very limited time to read fun stuff these days since I am always here with you guys, but on the day of THE GREAT BIRTHDAY HANGOVER OF 2014, I read the first few chapters and I am hooked. Kate is a horrid person. The book is written by a local in the town who was hired by US magazine to tail Kate and feed them info. Go get the book now if you are interested. I’ll review it eventually when I have time and share some highlights.
On to tonight’s shit show! Tonight is the birthday party that Kate if thrusting on the sextuplets. They all said they wanted to go to a place to have a party, but Kate wanted to do Carnival 2.0. It looks like we may have hope for the whole bouncy house lift off thing happening as God’s wrath shows up at the party. According to Hoffman’s book, Kate used God to get all the cash and prizes she could. Allegedly. So it’s not wonder God is pissed with her. Continue reading
Somehow, it slipped my mind that Kate Plus 8 was on TLC last night. TeeCee tweeted me toward the end of the show having some sort of aneurysm about it, so I was able to tape the midnight showing. I shall once again take one for the team. Let’s get started shall we?
As we return to this show, the sextuplets are turning 10, so Kate needs a show to pay for a big birthday bash and TLC was kind enough to oblige. I already went to open up TeeCee’s timeline to see what she had to say about the blond mop sitting on Kate’s head during her talking head segments. It’s awful. He skin looks really bad too. No glam squad budget from TLC?
Oh god. I was not told there would be birds. I hate birds. I hate people who let birds land on them and shit in their hair. I hate them so much! Even worse is that Kate is talking about what an animal lover she is. Am I the only one who remembers when they got a dog or two (Maybe it was Jon that got them?) and Kate let the kids all get attached to the dogs and then took them away to the pound or wherever? The kids are fighting over the bird. This gives me hope that one of them will accidentally squeeze it too hard. Continue reading
I really was just going to watch this show without recapping because I thought I was not in the mood, but we are not even five minutes in and Traci is drinking vodka for breakfast. Straight vodka. Allegedly. Do we believe this is actually happening? Who in their right mind would drink vodka for breakfast at all let alone in a house where they are getting therapy. Wouldn’t one of the therapy drag her by the wig to the nearest rehab? This has to be bullshit, right?
I don’t understand the hot button game. Shouldn’t it just be called scream disrespectful things at your partner. Clive doesn’t want Tanisha to do him so they just let Clive talk disrespect Tanisha. Jenni and Roger are smart enough to refuse to do it. But they get talked into it anyway. Gretchen also refused play the disrespectful game. I don’t think they even asked Trista and Ryan. It was a horrible exercise. The only couple who did the exercise, Clive and Traci are now fighting about the things Clive said. Mainly about Traci’s drinking. Traci is drunk and wants to leave. This is some great counseling! Get the couples pissed off at each other, and then walk away. Continue reading
This is a new show on We that comes on after Marriage Boot Camp. Basically, the premise is a single millionaire pretends to be an average Joe hoping to meet a girl who will not be after his money. Last week was the season premiere and the guy was terrible at it. For example, when he took a date to his fake apartment, he got lost and could not find where he “lives.” The girl was not happy at being deceived and things did not turn out happily ever after.
Let’s see what happens this week…
This guy’s millionaire is HOT! Oh he is a super model and physical trainer. He will be pretending to be a landscaper. Did I mention he is HAWT?
Blind Date #1 is Whitney. She is very pretty and confident. She’s a model wannabe. She’s a Jesus freak. She’s out.
Blind Date #2 is Also Whitney, she’s a blonde “VIP host at a casino.” Um, I think we all know what that means. The millionaire pulls up in a crappy truck. The dude is dumb. Whitney asked him a ton of questions. This is probably the girl for him.
Blind Date #3 Tiffany. She’s is from Iowa. Her jaw drops when she sees him. She is blonde and tacky and has backfat because her bra is the wrong size. She is wearing a fugly tee shirt and cropped yoga pants that are three sizes too small. She’s a definite no. Continue reading