Category Archives: Not a Recap

10 Things I Hate About Secrets & Wives

Secrets and Wives


1) Yankees

2) Yankees cooking in disposable aluminum. Aluminum is Satan. Alzheimer’s, Carcenogic, and most importantly, tacky.

3) Vapid fake blondes.

4) A VERY long infomercial for the cosmetic surgeon.

5) If you are going to be a fake blond, on a reality show, GET YOUR ROOTS DONE before filming.

6) You don’t have to be smart or pretty to be a gold digger on Long Island, it seems.

7) I’m Bored.

8)  Horrific wardrobes. Hot pink dresses and black nail polish?

9) Tacky. So Tacky.

10)  Yankees. Continue reading


Filed under Bravo, Not a Recap, Reality Show, Reality TV, Recap

Big Brother Veto Challenge

Photochop by Frax

Photochop by Frax

Apologies. I totally forgot I was supposed to be blogging Big Brother tonight. I was just sitting here enjoying watching it like a big ole fruit loop dingus. Then, when the veto comp happened, I though, wow! I can’t wait to chat on TT about this! Um, duh?

So the Veto competition was really hard. It was 16 comic book covers that you had to place in order to match the example. But each comic cover had two choices with slight differences. In order to win you had to zipline past a window for a glimpse at the example, then select the correct 16 covers and then put them in order. It took over 4 hours to complete the challenge. They ended up putting a 35 minute limit at some point, which Victoria didn’t make. And Zach had a major meltdown. He was still playing when Big Brother after dark came on and the non players were sequestered in HOH. So we got like an hour of Donny and Derrick and Frankie and Cody sitting in the room staring at each other. But you could hear Zach screaming and throwing things. At one point, he hurled a heavy cardbook comic cover right at the camera and hit it. Probably doing some significant damage. Then he had a tantrum and cried. Dude knows he is going home. Continue reading


Filed under Big Brother 16, Not a Recap

Fargo: A Review of Sorts


I have not been very subtle in my attempts to lure you people aware from the dying genre of reality TV and on to something different. Much like never wanting to be the last one to leave a party, we don’t want to be the last ones to move on from reality TV now that it seems to be jumping the shark and turning into nothing more than shows produced by men, designed to get women to act a fool on national television for money. I think we are all becoming bored with that. So here is another show to consider. Despite claims at the beginning of the show (and the movie that preceded it) that it is based on a true story, it is pure fiction straight from the creative imagination of the Coen Brothers. In a lovely change of pace, it’s the men on this show that do stupid things and the women, particularly one female cop, who try to save the day.

Fargo is a show about a drifter named Lorne Malvo (Billy Bob Thornton) who arrives in small-town Minnesota and brings with him a sack full of evil and malicious intent resulting in a series of murders. Upon his arrival Malvo crosses paths with an insurance salesman, Lester Nygaard (Martin Freeman).  Lester has a had a bit of a rough life. He has lived in the same small town where he was bullied throughout high school and his life has not improved as an adult. In the opening episode his bully and the bully’s two idiot sons harass him, he seems to be performing poorly at work, and his wife hen-pecks him to death about a broken washing machine. Malvo arrives as both his savior and his demise killing his bully and dragging him into a series of murders. Continue reading


Filed under News, Not a Recap, Recap

Flipping Out! Zoila Killed Lupe!

Jeff Lewis Colors

I somehow managed to get two episodes behind on Flipping Out. I love this show! I’m not interested in doing a full on recap of the episodes, but I did have a few things I wanted to share with y’all as talking points.

Zoila killed Lupe! I thank that is just fantastic! From the day she arrived, Lupe was trying to get Zoila’s cushy job with benefits like a Mercedes and a full body lift. Don’t come between a woman and her gay best friend bearing gifts. RIP, Lupe.

I’m experiencing some cognitive dissonance over the pleasure I get from watching everyone torture Andrew. I’m usually very upset by one cast member getting psychologically tortured and bullied by their cast mates.  This stance makes me feel all morally superior to the rest of you assholes. This show has cast my moral superiority aside and replaced it with heaping helpings of schadenfreude. I am a bad person.

I still do not like Meagan Weaver or her big beaver.  I also did not find the sommelier to be particularly attractive. Continue reading


Filed under Bravo, Flipping Out, Not a Recap

Scandal Recap: I Have So Many Questions! The Mellie Episode

Continue reading


Filed under News, Not a Recap, Scandal

Quotable Quotes From Tonights Real Housewives of Miami

RHOM3.2“It’s easy to take the high road when the low road is the gutter.” ~Lea

“I’m a trooper. I can always pull myself together!” ~Alexia

“Everyone loves Lauren Foster!” ~ Marysol

“What exactly is gay polo?” ~Lauren Foster Continue reading


Filed under Adriana de Moura, Alexia Echevarria, Ana Quincoces, Elaine Lancaster, Filming Real Housewives of Miami, Joanna Krupa, Karent Sierra, Lea Black, Lisa Hochstein, Marysol Patton, Not a Recap, Real Housewives of Miami, RHOM, Roy Black

Tamra’s OC Wedding: A Quiz (You Don’t Have to Watch To Play!)


Tonight, I am not writing a recap. I am giving you all a pop quiz. So put on your thinking caps and get ready to answer some tough questions. Actually, it’s just two. You can do it. There is a key at the bottom. Continue reading


Filed under Gretchen Rossi, Heather Dubrow, Lydia Stirling McLaughlin, Not a Recap, Real Housewives of Orange County, RHOOC, Tamra Barney, Vicki Gunvalson

It’s Time for SIBERIA Discussion!!!

siberiaI don’t know why I get so excited for this show. I’m a bit under the weather and I sprang up to watch this and record my newest questions here. Johnny was out picking flowers for Carolina when she wandered up. He didn’t want to admit what was doing.  They found a watering hole/ swimming spot and all got clean for the first time. Pretty much everyone showed up. The model girl goes topless.

Sabina did not join in. She said it is a weird place for them to have fun. I never noticed before but Sabina is a retired Israeli Soldier. So she probably isn’t an extraterrestrial. :) I like the person who said last week that she might be there for non game reasons trying to get into the area for some sort of military surveillance. (OF EXTRA TERRESTIALS!! :) ).

Oh Lord. I think she just burnt down the food shed. She probably has a storage of food built up in her cave hideaway. Maybe she just wants to make everyone quit so she can do whatever it is she is there to do.

Johnny is getting the blame. He has a lighter but no one knows it. He was there just before the fire. Maybe he dropped his lighter and Sabina found it? Sam is being a tyrant. Continue reading


Filed under Not a Recap, Siberia

Real Housewives of New Jersey (Fake Recap)

housewivesjerseyI am not going to be able to see the show today but that will not stop me from recapping it dammit.  So here we go….

So wow, what did you think of that scene with Rosie (they world’s most misnamed person) when she went on a rant about Teresa? Youse don’t wanna be around us? Hows about we doesn’t wanna be around youse guys! (crotch grab) Hows about dem apples? Fuck youse you fucking fucks. Youse got a hairy fucking forehead, yo fatass husband cheats on yer ass with the nanny and you gotta some out of control monsta kids, you fucking fuck. Continue reading


Filed under Caroline Manzo, Chris Manzo, Gia Giudice, Jacqueline Laurita, Joe Giudice, Joe Gorga, Kathy Wakile, Melissa Gorga, Not a Recap, Real Housewives of New Jersey, RHONJ, Teresa Giudice

The Blogger Vents

bloggingNote: This Blog Started out with a totally different topic.

Blogging is a weird thing. I feel like I need to blog every day, and sometimes there is just nothing that interests me or that I think will interest you. Other days I am blogging as fast as I can from morning until night. Feast or famine. And then there are stories I am not sure how to tell, that I want to write whether you are interested in them or not. It’s 12:30 a.m. and I have a blog with lots of sources I have pulled up but I am not sure how to pull it together. (Turns out it will wait for another day).

I’ve been cranky all day. The day started off poorly from the first moment and became more annoying as time wore on. I blame the utter failure of #compassion2013. It seems the more “successful” your blog becomes, the more comments you have, the more you are compelled to babysit. Babysitting the comments requires reading them all. They stream in around the clock. Lately, it doesn’t matter if the topic is a Bravo show or a death penalty trial the comments are decidedly negative.  Or illiterate. Or stupid. Or just plain untrue. Continue reading


Filed under Alexis Bellino, Gretchen Rossi, jodi arias, News, Not a Recap, Real Housewives of Orange County, RHOOC

Mob Wives Reunion Thoughts: Why Don’t We Get Drunk and Dr. Drew?

mobwiveslogoOkay Mobwives people, can any of you explain why DR. DREW is the moderator for the foul language fest known as the Mobwives reunion? Didn’t Joy Behar try her hand at this once? I think she was better. I suppose someone thought they all needed a mental health professional to referee, but this is beyond odd.

I love how when Big Ang speaks, no one interrupts. Big Ang says that Love was wrong. Renee seems to think that Love was fine, but it was not the right time. Karen said basically that Love had to do what she had to do. Continue reading


Filed under Mob Wives, mobsters, Not a Recap, Reality Show, Reality TV, Renee Graziano, VH1

Who Will Admit to Watching Buckwild? Here’s a Lame Recap

buckwildcastI missed the first couple minutes of this show which appears to be even more ridiculous than Jersey Shore.  These kids seem really young. Are they even old enough to drink? They are literally rolling around in the mud in the middle of Nowhere, West By God Virginia. I dated a guy from West By God Virginia once because he was hot, but he was dumber than a sack or doorknobs. It appears MTV has put all the girls in a house that unfortunately is very close to neighbors who already hate them.

One of the guys is a garbage man his name is Shain because, his parents could not spell Shane. West Virginia is really pretty!  I can’t say the same for the cast. The crew is swimming in water outside a power plant. I can enjoy a good episode of that redneck challenge show, and learned to almost like Jersey Shore but this combination of the two is not working for me. All the boys want to do Cara and are jockeying for position to see who gets to go first. My money in on Tyler he’s the more attractive of the guys, which isn’t saying much and seems to have the highest level of education, perhaps tenth grade. Continue reading


Filed under Not a Recap, Recap