Kenya is moved to “Geraldo’s Team” as Trump puts it. Finally separating Kenya and Brandi. Vivica wanted Ian and Geraldo wanted Leeza.
The Task: Trump wants an interactive theme environment for Trump Golf and Hotel resort in Miami. WTF is an interactive theme environment? Trumps boys will judge on creativity, innovation and guest interactions. I have no idea what this task means.
Geraldo Rivera, Vivica Fox, Kate Gosselin, Kenya Moore
Project Manager: Kate Gosselin
Geraldo has been to the resort ( of course he has) and played the course and it is all about something on the course called “the blue monster.” I dunno maybe a hole with a lot of water challenges? Geraldo wants the blue monster to be the theme but others feel it may not be upscale enough for Trump. Kate wants to go with it anyway. Kenya has very definite ideas. Kenya has drawn a set and wants to over see the set production. Something she says she has experience in. But Kenya wants to send Kenya and Vivica shopping like everyone else has done to her. This already is too many women on a team. I predict a loss with Kate going home before we even start. Kenya points out that they will be gone a long time while shopping. Kate doesn’t care.
Kenya is aggravated that her skills are not being used. However, at this point, Vivica and Kenya are still getting along. But in Vivica’s talking heads she rewrites history a little bit as if she was always keeping her eye on her. #editing
Geraldo is the bartender making “Blue Monster” drinks. Kenya hates EVERY THING about the set. Kate stupidly tells Trumps son and the executives about the drama between Kenya and Vivica. If this team loses, Kate is going home. Continue reading
The Task: Host a Circle Line Boat Tour around the city with an original theme and provide the entertainment. The winner will be decided solely on guest feedback.
I titled this episode of Celebrity Apprentice before watching so if the captain doesn’t go down with the ship, I may have to think of a better title. The official title is ” It’s Like A Booze Cruise With Knowledge.” Which seems dumb. So hopefully we see a captain go down with their ship. :) Winner gets $30K
Kenya Moore, Brandi Glanville, Leeza Gibbons, Johnny Damon, Ian Zierling
Project Manager: Brandi Glanville
Brandi points out that Sig may think he as the advantage because he is the captain, but Sig is not going to be driving the boat. They are basically throwing a party and Brandi certainly knows how to party. When Brandi is passing out tasks she so far has given everyone something to do except for Kenya. Leeza has a talking head where she talks about her devotion to Brandi. I used to like Leeza. Past tense. Leeza implies that Kenya wants the team to fail. Brandi asks Kenya if she wants to be in charge of the entertainment and the graphics. Which is pretty much everything. Interesting. Kenya points out those are two very broad things. If they could come up with a theme, that would help her tremendously. It’s all very polite. And Kenya has Ian who is very pro-Kenya to support her. Leeza talks about Brandi and Ian teaming up against Brandi? Really? How about how they just get along like you do with the trashbox that is Brandi Glanville, Leeza. Kenya throws out ideas for themes because Brandi seems to have none. Everyone seems to like Mardi Gras Manhattan except for Brandi. Brandi wants the theme to be more New York. I think she has a valid point. Kenya asks Brandi what charity she is playing for and she says Make A Wish. Kenya compliments her charity and says she wants to make it clear that she is on board and wants to win. Brandi says she doesn’t believe Kenya and thinks she wants to see her go down. Brandi doesn’t get how this game is played. It’s a team effort at this point.
No one wants to be in the boardroom. No. One. As long as they are the same team, they are ON THE SAME TEAM.
Brandi agrees to go to Mardi Gras at first. But then changes her mind. I agree with Brandi. Brandi goes with Leeza’s idea of Big Apple Bonanza. Whatever that means. It is very NYC focused. Kenya offers to sing her Gone With The Wind Fabulous. Brandi thinks it’s a good idea, because if they lose, she can try to get Kenya fired.
Brandi’s cruise goes well. The entire team is working together. Leeza narrated the cruise very well. Someone says, “It’s like a booze cruise with knowledge.” Johnny got the band. They are a well oiled machine. They will win.
Kenya sings her Gone With The Wind Song! Everyone twirls. It was way over the top. She lies on the deck and does pelvic thrusts. A parent literally covers her child’s eyes. If they lose, Kenya is gone. Brandi recovers with a congo line.
Whoever sells the most wedding dresses and raises the most money wins.
Kenya Moore, Brandi Glanville, Leeza Gibbons, Johnny Damon, Ian Zierling, Terrell Owens
Project Manager: Ian Zierling
Ian wanted this challenge because it is probably the only big money challenge left. He seems passionate about his charity. Ian has a great charity for a little known genetic disease in kids. Ian says he has $185K lined up. Kenya says she can bring in $10K. Terrell Owens is slacking.
Ian has design people on standby for interior décor. The stores are side by side and his is clearly the front runner in the staging department. Meanwhile, Brandi goes AWOL saying she is having panic attacks so she went back to her room to lay down. Brandi has a Xanax script. Nine out of ten panic attacks can be stopped about 20 minutes after taking one. Ian is not happy. Kenya makes sure everyone knows how bad this is for Brandi. Kenya calls Brandi a crazy bitch several times.
The next day, Brandi brought in a ton of money very early. Ian got a check for $165,000. I really want Ian to win. He has really hustled to bring in the money and Geraldo’s charity has already one. Continue reading
Develop a four page fitness editorial to be featured in the hot and healthy pages of Cosmopolitan and to be featured on an app. Teams will be judged on creativity, originality and overall presentation.
Kenya Moore, Brandi Glanville, Kate Gosselin, Vivica Fox, Shawn Johnson (Olympic Gymnast), Leeza Gibbons, Jamie Anderson (Olympic Snowboarder)
Project Manager: Jaime Anderson
Good Lord. Jaime is playing for a climate change awareness charity. I hate her so much. Since they have two Olympians on the team they are using that as their theme, “Trained by Olympians.” Kenya points out that Cosmo is a sexy magazine She wants to have a girl with the words Touch Me and that is the area you will get information on working out. I suppose that is for the app? Jamie says she can teach them how to get the Kenya Moore booty. Brandi says, “You just buy it.” And we are off to the races. Continue reading
Something tells me that Jaime/Shawn whichever one is the project manager lets her issues with Kenya affect the team challenge. #MeanGirls #Karma
The Task: Create a bistro featuring a tasting menu of Luvo food products. Food products doesn’t sound very appetizing. They will be judged on brand messaging and overall experience.
Infinity: Kenya Moore, Brandi Glanville, Kate Gosselin, Vivica Fox, Shawn Johnson (Olympic Gymnast), Leeza Gibbons, Jamie Anderson (Olympic Snowboarder)
Project Manager: Vivica Fox
The ladies get off to a bad start. Eventually, they have a slogan, “Love yourself, one bite at a time.” The slogan was created by Kenya and Leeza. The ladies decide to play a variety of roles to show the variety of consumer types. I don’t get how that is going to work. It’s a bistro challenge not a commercial. Kenya casts herself as the beauty queen and Vivica kindly allows it.
Vivica’s phone is not working. Shawn has bad PMS. Vivica doesn’t care. Shawn and Kate shop for dishware and such. They seem to have all the time in the world while everyone else is rushing around. They spend six hours shopping. Kenya is worried because no one seems to think they should rehearse their presentation. Continue reading
Penn Jillette, one of the smartest men in the entertainment industry wrote about his experiences on Celebrity Apprentice in his memoir published in 2012. Check out this except to get his take on what the experience is like. I’ve read it several times. I love his sense of humor. I guess since Penn describes Trump’s hair as ” like cotton candy made of piss.” We won’t be seeing him return this season. :)
The Hawthorne effect—coined in 1950 in response to factory workers’ productivity increases when they were being observed— manifests in every clinical shrink study of people’s motivations. When anyone watches anyone do anything, the watched people do whatever they’re being watched doing a little better for the short time while they’re being watched. The key is that the behavioral improvements are temporary. If the Hawthorne effect worked for more than a few days with TV cameras, we wouldn’t have “The Celebrity Apprentice.”
I noticed the Hawthorne effect for the first few days of my season of “The Celebrity Apprentice,” but it sure didn’t last long. We celebrities are desperate pigs. I knew several of my co-stars prior to working on “TCA” together. I had hung out with them and worked with them in high-pressure situations. None were close friends, but I liked them all and thought I knew them a bit. But sixteen hours a day with TV cameras all around, doing pointless fake corporate tasks outside one’s skill set with Clay Aiken, and no one worries about the whole world watching (with the exception of anyone who has a job, someone to talk to, a nice view out the window or a solitaire program). You’re happy if you don’t swallow your own tongue.
The secret truth of “The Celebrity Apprentice” is that it isn’t very hard. The tasks are nothing. Makeup starts just after 5 a.m. and the show goes to about 10 p.m., but you spend most of that time doing nothing. Anyone who isn’t in show business could accomplish everything the show called for and have time left over to do their laundry, cook their supper and post pictures of their animal companion on Facebook. “The Celebrity Apprentice” is easy like junior high is easy. All the arithmetic, the creative writing and the history are super simple, but like junior high, you do that easy work surrounded by people who are full-tilt hormone-raging bugnutty. Everyone is panicked, desperate, yelling, swearing, attacking, backstabbing, failing to get laid and acting crazy. With all this drama, any sane person just wants to do more algebra. “The Celebrity Apprentice” is junior high with a better brand of acne cover-up. Continue reading
OMG I CAN’T WAIT! #DramaQueenWithoutACrown #IDon’tConsiderAnythingSheSays Continue reading
I just read a great interview of Nene Leakes by Dave Quinn, a reporter for NBC’s NY affiliate. I just had to share it with you. He asks great questions. I thought “Do you have any regrets from being on RHOA was especially smart. It’s a really good interview! Of course Nene brings up salaries for RHOA. Implies that Cynthia dumped her because she got a raise. Just get started reading it!
NBC 4 NEW YORK: Is this your first holiday season in New York?
NENE LEAKES: It is. I’ve been here once or maybe twice for New Year’s Eve, but I’ve never lived here this long a period of time. My youngest son and my husband are here now, and right now we’re scrambling looking for a place to eat for Thanksgiving. Usually I cook for my family, but this year we’re going out. Continue reading
First, I am sorry once again for this taking so long. Y’all know I love The Blacklist, but sadly brawling housewives take precedence here over scripted shows. I have to pay the bills. :) But I’m excited to finally have a moment to see what I missed. So let’s get going and find out what a “Decembrist” is…
Oh crap. I am already pissed and I am one second in. I hate flashbacks. Is this really necessary? I guess that was necessary sort of. It just explains what Liz has been doing with Tom, but I think we all assumed that anyway. The bit where Tom implies he may have actually fallen in love with Liz is mean and gives us all false hope that Tom and Liz could still be a thing. Or that Tom will live through this. I have a soft spot for ole Tom, so sue me.
I am trying to care about the backstory of Berlin’s daughter. But I really don’t. Whatever. The Decembrist is the dude that set Red up as the murderer of Berlin’s not dead daughter. Red is going to go rub him out. He ropes Liz in by saying he is the one ultimately responsible for “gutting Cooper” and killing Agent Malik.
Meanwhile back in the belly of some ship, the ship guy tells Liz that Tom must die. She is hesitant. But really, with the Berlin thing all straightened out now, what is he good for other than looking pretty?
Liz goes to the post office to convince them to get on the Decembrist case. Which makes no sense to anyone as their target was Berlin. My favorite TV middle easterner, Aram works his magic to find out who the Decembrist is he’s some high ranking Russian official named Kiero Morozov. Isn’t it amazing he can do this in five minutes every single week? The man is a genius. And hot. The lady who I think is Cooper’s superior tries to point out the difference between the FBI. You know, things like the FBI is a national police force that focuses on things happening in the US whereas the CIA is in charge of shit that goes down overseas. But since when has anyone on this task force followed that protocol. They seem to get around it by making it a “joint taskforce” of sorts with some token CIA member that usually gets killed. Plus, all the blacklisters are usually apprehended a couple blocks from the post office in the end anyway. Continue reading
I didn’t recap the episode from last week because it was gross. Like stewmaker gross. Only this time crazy people were hunting other people for sport and stuffing them and arranging them into little villages. Or something. I could barely pay attention. Plus we have come to the part of the season where no one really cares anymore about the people on the blacklist that get caught by the task force every week. This week was pretty much the same but more boring than gross.
All I really care about is the storyline with Red, Liz, and Tom (with a side of Liz and Ressler). During that gross hunting episode we met the girl who Red has been looking for, for years. She works on a food truck. He goes to stalk her. They have wistful moments. We are led to believe that this is Red’s long-lost daughter. Was I the only one watching them eat and discuss anchovies looking at her very weird eyes thinking she looks not a thing like Red. I mean even being half Asian could not have made her look like a possible biological child. As it turns out it isn’t his daughter, it’s Berlins! All this time Berlin has hated Red and been after him because he thought he killed his daughter. But he didn’t he was apparently set up! Continue reading
There sure are a lot of doctors on The Blacklist. This week’s doctor, Linus Creel is only 7 numbers away on the list from last week’s Dr. James Covington. I really should put all the blacklisters in order by name and number or get an unpaid intern to volunteer. :) If anyone is willing, you can see all the recaps so far, here.
We begin this week with a seemingly nice lady who is down on her luck speaking to a banker about saving her home. She seems very stressed and sweaty. There is a man watching her in a car outside. When the banker turns her down, she goes out to her car and gets a gun and starts blowing people away inside the bank. The dude watching her has what looks like her medical file and make a voice notation that the situation was a success.
Red tries to get Naomi to go back into a protection program again and she is not willing to leave her husband Frank. Red says if she loves him, they need to start a new life. Frank says they don’t need his help. Frank doesn’t trust Red. Red puts Pee Wee Herman on the case and Pee Wee discovers that the reason Frank doesn’t want to relocate is because he has a mistress he would have to leave behind. Whatever, Frank, I’m sure you can get a new mistress at the new place. Pee Wee was super upset with the mistress for leaving the dog in the house all day. So he takes the dog to Frank. So Frank gets to move with two bitches after all. Red tells Frank he will be faithful to Naomi and go into his protection. He persuaded Frank with a stick to the throat. It worked. Continue reading