Category Archives: Dumbasses

Catfish Candic & Titus

Catish Candic

 

Well this is new, the pumpkin walls are starting in the hotel room on this episode. Was this filmed for the last season? Because watermelon is the new pumpkin. Also, we know the hotel would not let them paint the walls, so this is either a weird coincidence or proof of the CGI.

Candic is 27 and she pronounces her name just as one would if their parents were aware that it needed an ‘e’ on the end. I imagine people called her Can dick or Candy dick all through middle school. Thanks mom and dad!  Candic is married and met Titus through “a retail app she uses for work.”  He was shopping for a handbag?? And oh hey! He lives in her town and yet they have never met or spoken on the phone. She’s been married for seven years and has a four-year old daughter.

She is ready to meet the guy and then she will tell her husband about him. Unless, you know, he is really cute or something. She is an idiot. As Max says she should just stop talking to Titus and move on with life and not put all of this on TV.

I am calling this right now. The guy is her husband and they are doing this for attention and a new sofa. Or not. She won’t let the boys come to her house because her husband is home. So they meet at a bed and breakfast with gorgeous wood walls that need no CGI. It does look like they got new furniture though.

I’ll spare you the whole long traumatic childhood story with Candic. The boys get to work doing their basic Google search investigation that any 9-year-old could do.  They carry out their investigation at a place that sells homemade marshmallows. Who knew that was a thing. I want one. Or six.

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Catfish Spencer & Katy — London Calling!

Catfish Spencer Morrill
If nothing else this episode we are going to London, and since my passport just expired and renewing it seems quite traumatic (passport photo! Hail noe!) I may be limiting my travel to the U.S. for a bit.   Oh and it looks like we will be meeting Katy Perry! So even more fantastic!

Spencer is some random dude from Tennessee. That’s all we get from him before he let’s us know he has been chatting with Katy Perry, yes that Katy Perry, for six years.  Just when you think this show could not get any more ridiculous it does. He even says that he talked to Katy once and the phone call was $270 because she was on tour in Canada on a Canadian phone.  Does this dude think 1-900 is the area code for Canada perhaps?

Not a lot of the usual CGI at Spencer’s house, but the staging people did an impeccable job with the cleaning and the colorful use of Mexican blankets. Can they CGI that couch that bright green color? Those of you who watch this nonsense with me simple to evaluate the staging of the homes , I think we should start paying attention to some of the cloth sofas. Perhaps they are not being CGIed as well?  The wall colors here are quite normal. I guess they had to save some cash staging the Knoxville house for the tickets to London.

While chatting with the boys, Spencer says that he and Katy have exchanged “I love yous” many times over the years. And that the reason he knows it is her is that she shares her songs with him before they are released. He has heard rough cuts of her songs before they were announced.  But these “unreleased songs” were published on You Tube.  So um, delusional.

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Nene Leakes Is The Latest #RHOA To Get An IRS Tax Lien !

Nene Bringing in the Money

 

According to Daily Mail Linnethia Monique Leakes, was hit with a Federal Tax Lien on July 22 in Georgia court. The IRS wants a total of $824,366.01 in back taxes for the year 2014, according to court documents. How could she possibly owe that much in taxes? Well, in 2014 she was paid well under a million dollars by RHOA, but also received a six figure income from DWTS where she placed seventh on the show. She also had income from her role on Cinderella that year and got an advance on her clothing line which also began in 2014.  And she did a few other paid appearances and sold a bunch of t-shirts and crap.  In nearly every one of those instances, Nene was paid as an independent contractor which means she got the checks with no taxes taken out and received a copy of the 1099 which was sent to the IRS by the employers. I guess she thought she just didn’t need to file taxes.

According to my calculations, using the tax amount as the known variable, Nene make approximately $2.1 million in 2014 and did not file a tax return.  She did buy that giant house where she never lives.  And the IRS is grateful for that, because they have placed a lien on the property.

According to the lien, it looks like she has ten years to refile.  But I would not count on that. The IRS will be quite unhappy with the lack of filings and will now look into her previous and future years very closely. Something tells me this was not a one time thing.

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Real Housewives of New York Recap: Tomfoolery

RHONY Bethenny angry
It’s time for Andy’s favorite moment of the season, when Bethenny rips Lu’s heart out of her chest and eats it. It has come down to this because Luann has remained unbothered by each and every escalating attack all season even when the entire pack has attacked at once. Luann must pay, so Bethenny has put out feelers or perhaps hired a P.I. to tail Tom and get her some dirt.  If you don’t believe that, then you must believe Bethenny has lots of friends who happen to be strategically located wherever Tom is who feel comfortable calling a woman with a small child sleeping in the house at 2 a.m.  If you believe that you must also believe that Bethenny has tons of friends who are mutual acquaintances of every who just so happen to tell her about things like Jules marriage.

Speaking of Bethenny, I have been asleep for almost 18 hours, I woke up to several emails saying that Bethenny is thinking of leaving the show because she is butthurt over the reunion and some legal issues with Bravo.  While I could see her quitting over the first one, if you go to the ET story that is the source, she is referring to the fact that some of the other housewives refuse to show all of their personal lives on the show and keep some things “behind a do not cross police line.”  That’s an odd comment from someone whose ex husband wisely will not let her pimp her daughter on the show.  Bethenny wants to  control her edit and she clearly can’t do that on RHONY. If she leaves, it will be because she has a radio show now, where she has total control of the content.  That said, Bethenny’s dramatic comments always seem to come on a show day.  Take that as you will.

And now, I am going to try to do a decent job on this recap as I get it is a very important episode. But, I’m working at half speed so apologies in advance.

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Bachelor In Paradise: A Virgin Is Sacrificed

BIP Ashley crying
I don’t always post about the Tuesday night shows because the last Tuesday show was kind of boring but on tonight’s show, Ashley I, the world’s oldest virgin, comes back to cry her way through another episode and ruin Jared’s chances with Caila and people seem to be taking bets on whether or not Evan will live or die so, I mean, this sounds fantastic.

So Ashley I. comes back and immediately flocks to Jared who informs her that he is “hanging out with Caila” and we are off on the express train to Crazy Town and Ashley I.  has purchased all the seats.  Sidenote: I grabbed the local train out of Crazy Town today, and well, so far, so good.  Back in Crazy Town Ashley has a long conversation with a rude parrot. I had totally forgotten that Ashley will sit and have a conversation with the wildlife for hours. And not in the totally sane way in which I discussed the abnormal nipple placement of a Chinese Olympic Diver today with Banjo, today.  Ashley is already threatening to go home.  But first she goes to confront Caila. Apparently Ashley and Caila were friends prior to Paradise and Caila promised that she was not interested in Jared. Jared tells Ashley to ask Daniel. YES! That would be a perfect match!  And for once, Ashley actually listens to Jared! Bye Sarah!

Ashley brought with her within minutes of her arrival a very bad storm. Her date card said something about sacrificing and it is pouring rain with tons of wind and lightning. Production would have requested this weather for this date if they could have, because now it is even more ominous.  The two go together to this place that looks like a giant Mayan Tomb with huge carvings that is part of some resort.  No sooner do they sit down to dinner alone in the crypt than Daniel says, “So I heard you were a virgin, is that true?”  #KanookianKlazzy  Daniel’s next overture to his virgin is to say that he swings both ways but only on Fridays and he has his eye on Nick.  Ashley says Jared would be a better choice. See? I knew these two would be fantastic together!  They bond over a conversation about Jared.  Ashley tells Daniel that she is the crying virgin.  The whole virgin thing turns Daniel on. It’s Kismet!

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Drama Is Released on Bond After Bomb Threat Involving Phaedra Parks

RHOA Phaedra Face
While we had some uplifting news about Kenya Moore today, the latest news about Phaedra Parks is, as usual, about a felon.  As you recall, while Phaedra Parks was in Washington with all the other political idiots at the DNC, her former client and Angela Stanton’s former boyfriend was hunting her down in Atlanta. Drama (aka Terence Cook) was in the building where Phaedra keeps her latest law office last month, but in the wrong office, apparently her name is not on the directory of the building, or the door of the main office where she rents space, or he was just confused or high or all of the above.  While there, he became agitated when he was told she didn’t work in the office he was in. He said something about having a bomb strapped to his leg and had to be arrested by the police while SWAT did a bomb search that showed up nothing.

After that, both Phaedra and Drama’s mama contacted TMZ to let them know it was all a big misunderstanding.  Or that the cops racially profiled him as a gang member based on his long white t-shirt or that he was just dropping off a CD or perhaps it was a mixed tape.  At any rate, Drama is totally innocent and Phaedra was going to hunt down a real live criminal attorney to represent him.

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