I realize I should be telling y’all this but it is 3 am and I really don’t care that much. But they are posing in front of a Bravo step and repeat… That’s all I got.
The previews for Rea Housewives of Atlanta: Secrets Revealed! are such to make us think this is going to be good. I am of little faith. I was not impressed by the Beverly Hills version. Let’s watch what happens…
Cynthia says that she was so thankfully that a lot of Nene’s scenes were in LA so that the fans would stop attributing her every action to Nene. I get that. It’s true that this season we sort of judged Cynthia based on her own motives and I think overall she came off well. Cynthia is so drop dead stunning, I’d hate to lose her from the show. Cynthia and Kenya went to “play golf.” Really? Neither of these women strike me as the golfing type. But okaaaay. Kenya is accusing SOMEONE ELSE of being gay now? For Kenya to be such dear friends with Lawrence, you would think that the whole gay thing would be more understood by here. To be fair, Atlanta has gay rumors about almost everyone from football players to musicians. But, still shouldn’t Kenya have some sort of functioning gaydar? I could see Porsha not having any gaydar, but Kenya has to know better, right? I can’t see Porsha saying that or Cynthia taking it seriously. Continue reading »
Well boys and squirrels, it looks like we will not have Kenya Moore to kick around anymore. Kenya has bid us all a fond adieu on the Bravo blog! I don’t think anyone is surprised she was not asked back. What is a surprise though is that she was either on all her meds or got a lot of help writing her “long good-bye” as she bids us farewell with…. dare I say class? I don’t usually include an ENTIRE blog from the housewives but since this one is so well-written and full of some interesting tea, I am going to post Kenya’s Long Goodbye in its entirety with limited snarky comments. Click through to read. Continue reading »
Um, oopsy. I slept through Sunday, y’all. Perhaps I should have listen to the doctor and gone and gotten some tests run, but …I was too sleepy! Let’s see if I can get through this reunion without a nap.
It’s round three of The Real Housewives of Atlanta. Time to see what I missed. We start with Nene reading her make-up texts with Kim. Time for a Todd and Kandi package. Wow, that witch doctor from South Africa was right! That’s kind of cool. Also, does anyone remember at the vow renewals for Cynthia and Peter when Kandi and Todd’s lantern took off right away and Kenya and Walter’s crashed? It’s kismet! I wish Kandi would learn out to sit without showing her lady garden. Andy’s questions for Kandi were kind of negative! Continue reading »
I have the worst headache in the world. My left eyeball feels like it’s being stabbed with a RHONJ stiletto. I want to pluck it out and put it in my purse and blog half blind. I say all that for pity of course, but also as an apology in advance that this blog is probably going to be crappy.
I saw the first 15 minutes or so on first look earlier today. I was not impressed. It’s just Nene’s time to talk about how impartial she is and how she tries to keep the other girls from fighting and looking like fools on TV. She says she wish someone would have shaken her and told her to stop when she first started RHOA. Then there is the usual Nene and Gregg fake storyline. While that is running, I will take the time to explain that when wearing a long gown with a slit up to there, when seated one should cover ones knees with the skirt of the gown and not display shiny, greasy legs or in Kandi’s case your black underpants. Close your legs to married men! Is a good suggestion, but close your legs to the giant TV camera pointed at you is equally useful information. Continue reading »
It’s time for the Real Housewives of Atlanta reunion and Andy is wasting no time. The first order of business is to ask Kandi about serving Kim with papers about Tardy for the Party. It sounds almost like Phaedra served the papers on Kim at the reunion! Kandi says that Kim brought that on herself She was no longer going to allow her to benefit from the song. Coincidentally, Funky Dineva, who I believe is a friend of Kandi’s and appears on her Kandi Coated Nights show from time to time recently released the unedited version of The Ring Doesn’t Mean A Thing which has Kim singing with no autotune. Interesting timing, no?
Phaedra wastes no time with the subtle jabs at Kenya saying “everyone up here is a lady,…..well everyone up here is a female.” Kenya has had her sour face on most of the time. Remind me again how I am supposed to understand that she is not taking all of this seriously, Kenya fans? Puhlease. Andy asks Phaedra what her Mama the preacher thinks about her…what did he call it? open attitude? And Phaedra is the first to say the word penis. She says she likes looking at large penises. That’s our Phaedra displaying her knowledge of being a “southern belle” on national television. Continue reading »
Okay, I need EVERYONE to stop what you are doing right now. Watch this video! I.AM.SERIOUS. Continue reading »
It is the finale of the Real Housewives of Atlanta and that means there is only a month left before the season ends! We begin with Kenya planning her “gala” aka costume party that will serve as the final bash of the season. Kenya wants to have some scenes from classic movies with famous black actresses acted out at the party. So she thinks really hard about appropriate suggestions. Should she go with Dorothy Dandridge and Pearl Bailey in Carmen Jones? How about Butterfly McQueen as Prissy in her favorite movie of all time, Gone With the Wind? Nope, that is not what Kenya’s brain comes up with. She wants Eddie Murphy in Coming to America. Specifically the royal wedding scene “with all of the dancers with the feathers on their heads.” I am not kidding. She also calls it her “coming out party.” If she does indeed decide to come out, that might explain lots of things. You know, sometimes people accuse others of things they themselves are guilty of.
Meanwhile Phaedra is putting her donkey booty video behind her, (her bad pun, not mine) and moving on to the production of her new pink stun gun she calls, “Phaedra Sparks.” Again. Not kidding. Kandi zaps the stun gun on one of the self-defense guys accidentally. Sort of. Phaedra wants to try hers out on Kenya. Good plan, Phaedra, good plan. I did not recap the mandatory sex talk for Phaedra and Kandi scenes. Continue reading »
Tonight on the Real Housewives of Atlanta, we are back at Kandi’s housewarming party at the point where Kenya stomps off screaming about Walter stalking her. I don’t understand why we could not have just wrapped up this little hissyfit last week.
Nene and Gregg are in LA. Nene has arrived. She has her happiness back. Gregg’s teefs are so white they are purple. Nene’s aren’t much better. I missed what they were talking about because I got distracted wondering if Gregg had been eating blueberries. Was it important? Later Gregg is out at dinner with Nene. Nene rudely checks her phone during dinner. More Gregg sucking up to Nene. Gregg proposes. Gregg says Nene is the wind beneath his wings. Nene says yes.
Bravo is making Cynthia shoot scenes with Kenya again. I wonder if she got a bonus for that? Miss Lawrence was in the scene and the topic was Kandi’s housewarming party. Miss Lawrence made it clear that he was not invited. That Lawrence is blowing through housewives in a hurry. First he made all of Sheree’s hair fall out and now Kandi is mad at him over some Closet Freak argument or something. He still got his own show though because Andy Cohen is fascinated with men in pumps. Cynthia tells Kenya that she needs to learn how to handle herself in public situations. Cynthia should have said to Kenya, “Go out and find someone who will sleep with you! There has to be someone and it might help your disposition.” Continue reading »
The Real Housewives in Atlanta are back home and Porsha isn’t even unpacked yet when Kordell finds an EPT box. Porsha attempts to explain it by telling Kordell that Kandi had a “lingerie party” and she was giving everybody gift bags. I wonder why Kordell didn’t see the er…other gifts? Porsha needs directions to pee on a stick. That is not a joke. She is serious. Kordell can barely instruct her himself. I’m not sure this is a gene pool worth sperm actually swimming in. Porsha has started trying to act in her talking heads. sigh.
Porsha decides to tell Kordell that the other housewives make fun of her because Kordell is “controlling” right before they go to “Peter’s Health Event.” Kordell says he is in control but he is not controlling. Porsha decides to talk about having kids and where they are with that. You know, while the cameras are rolling. It just comes up. Oh wait no it doesn’t. It was surely written on a cue card behind Kordell’s head. Kordell says he is the man of the house and he is not going to contribute to actually raising the kid. She needs to decide if she wants a baby or a career. Porsha wants a nanny. Kordell says no way. Continue reading »