I literally feeling like my brain is decaying. I’m serious. My brain feels heavy in my skull, I’m having trouble keeping my eyes open and my eyes are blurry. I think between the heat and all the serious decisions I’ve had to make lately, I have fried and possibly pickled my brain. But I shall try to recap this nonsense as best I can.
Heather can sing? Apparently so. She sang the national anthem at the Angels game recently.
Right away Andy plays the clip of Vicki calling Brooks. I don’t get the big mystery here. She is being ostracized by the group for a situation he is ultimately responsible for, and she loved him even though he was horrible to her. She left a party feeling alone, and she drunk dialed. Am I the only one who has ever drunk dialed the last person on earth I’d ever want to see sober? I guarantee you before Vicki even open her eyes the next day her first thought was “Please tell me I didn’t really call him.”
Next week Shannon and Kelly get together to
work things out argue some more. Shannon denies setting Kelly up with the two bitches at her party. She claims one of the women was instrumental in “helping Heather and her with their HOA.” The problem they had with their HOA was that everyone hates them for filming in the neighborhood. It could not be anymore obvious that those two were there to attack Kelly.
I can’t believe it is has been a week since Flipping Out was on . I have been muttering Todo Limpio to myself for a full week and have cleaned nothing and only made more mess. Between the excessive heat and my anxiety being riled up I have to force myself to eat. I had two containers of my favorite yogurt in the fridge and last night I checked the dates and they expired on June 22. This is the weekend to TODO LIMPIO. Or just get some good sleep in. One or the other.
I’m still not sure I believe that Jeff and Gage and Zoila are living on a job site. I’m also unclear on whether or not it is an actual flip or if they will be living there when the house is complete. I am excited to see Zoila right off the bat she makes me happy. And we got to the vagina texts. Really is this Bravo them that someone must mention vaginas in every episode of every Bravo show? Has the National Council on Vagina Awareness purchased promotional time on Bravo? Zoila got a sext from someone woman in Connecticut who was apparently trying to get someone to come perform oral on her and it mistakenly went to Zoila. Maybe it would be funny if I wasn’t so hot and bitchy today. It is pretty funny that Jeff is buying life insurance for himself and Zoila. Or maybe he was joking about Zoila. You never know with him. He is also making Gage his durable power of attorney.
Peter didn’t share any earth shattering RHOA gossip on Wendy Williams. But the fact that he was there and the odd point he kept reinforcing was quite telling. Wendy came busting out to her hot topics chair to say she was very excited that Peter contacted her via intercom to let her know she was free to go in on him and no question is off the table.
First of all, Peter contacted the show asking to be on. So he has something he wants to put out there in the universe. He comes out saying that the guys on the show never get a voice. Wendy jumps in, “Because it’s called housewives!” He seems to be on a talk show he invited himself on to talk about how reality show participants always have their business out in the streets. Peter found out that Cynthia filed for divorce on E! Wendy says he must have really pissed her off. Wendy asks, ” Were you cheating wildly? Did you embezzle money from her?”
Peter points out that they have never had a shared bank account.
This is really stupid and I can’t believe I am going to watch this, but I thought y’all might like a place to comment. Did I mention how dumb this is?
Gia is the Miss Bravo. Jenni Pulos hosts the west coast event with all the west coast Bravolebs.
Don’t Call It A Comeback Award
Craig Conover, Teresa Giudice, Stassi Schroeder, Sheree Whitfiel or Satan. The winner was Satan. Or the Felon. It might have been the Felon by Bravo.
Remember this walk off video of the felon? Their next question was going to be about Heather Dubrow. Andy brings this up and Teresa blows it off. Anyone know what Heather said?
The Bravo Bro Award
James Kennedy, Pol Pot, Ben Robinson, Shep Rose, and Jax Taylor.
Jax narrowly beats out Pol Pot. James was played by a Amy Phillips. I think James is off the show.
Contour De Force
Erika Jayne, Katheryn Dennis, Ru Paul, Lala Kent, Nene Leakes and Kenya Moore.
If there was a winner, I missed it
I was happy to hear that Flipping Out’s regular night will be Thursdays. On the other hand that is live eviction night for Big Brother and tonight was a super good episode so I got all caught up in the lives feeds. So, Flipping Out recaps won’t ever be right after the show ends like most Real Housewives recaps.
Zoila has been promoted to house manager. This is sort of an honorary promotion because all the cleaning is getting to be too much for Zoila. Jeff loves Zoila like his mother and she will be living with him forever. He situation with Jeff is much tighter than Gage’s actually. I totally forgot to include in my WWHL recap that a caller asked about wedding plans for Jeff and Gage. Jeff said they were not in a hurry to get married; however, his attorney recently informed him that in California they have been living together long enough for Gage to get palimony so now he thinks he should get a pre-nup and get married. Zoila doesn’t want to piss off the workers by telling them what to do. Since when?
Jeff does what Zoila didn’t want to do and walks around telling all the workers “todo limpio” which he says means clean up everything. He says this eleventy billion times. Zoila does take over once he leaves. Then she tells the new young girl to say it and she doesn’t want to. She’s afraid it will be insulting. Pretty much the same way Zoila felt. Yet Zoila doesn’t like the new girl.
MEGHAN WEAVER HAS A BIG BEAVER! It’s time for the premiere of Flipping Out and when I went to pull tags for the post I saw Meghan’s name and immediately giggled remembering Andrew’s inappropriate comment to her last summer. I’m ready to giggle so let’s get this party started. I need to get this up so I can eat something!
God I love this show already. I so needed this tonight.
My giggles end when I am reminded that they sold Gramercy AGAIN. That was the house, dammit. Why couldn’t they just live there? But know, they are flipping another house in Sherman Oaks and they are living in it during the construction. They live on one half of the house while the other house is under major renovations and then will move to the finished side to do the other. It’s ridiculous. There is no kitchen on the side of the house they are currently living on. I wonder if this is storyline. Because there can’t be a certificate of occupancy on this house. I think they just “live there” as in it’s their office where they spend all their time.
Remember when Jeff was fired from Living Spaces? I think it was because of this episode. It’s been six months and thirteen days since he was fired. He is still bitter about it. Apparently, Living Spaces didn’t pay everything they owed to Jeff. Jeff contemplates suing the company. I think instead he will go with just trash talking them on the show. Yep, Jeff said he can’t afford to sue them financially or emotionally.
Jeff dumps a client named Carol in a huge argument over the phone.