I’m so pleased to see Daisy from Blood Sweat & Heels on WWHL with Kenya Moore tonight. If you don’t watch the show she is battling cancer and it is great to see her out and about.
Kenya is very beautiful tonight in a tamed down ensemble. Daisy is also beautiful with a bit more bling. I and not even going to go there with the Prancing bartenders. Nene’s under three minute (or so I was told) appearance on that show makes me want to puke. If you don’t already know the Prancing whatevers are some gay kids who have been excluded from a team for being gay or not being female or whatever their crisis may be. But the story is that Nene has been crowing about some filming she did on Oxygen as if she had a new show. No. She went on to a show about gay people show them some support. Did she offer to kiss their ass and throw them a gay parade? Nene has been repeatedly offensive to the gay community and this was a DUMB PR move for the Prancing Elites or whatever. I will not be watching.
Kenya is STUNNING tonight. She says she heard Porsha cheated on Kordell, not the other way around. Andy asks if Kenya’s dress was inspired by Beyoncé and she said no it was custom made for her by a designer who is her friend. As she says this the photo of Beyoncé in a very similar dress is shown side by side with hers. So Yes. It was inspired by that dress obviously. And Kenya wore it better. And Kenya’s dress is prettier.
Andy makes fun of Nene walking out of all the scenes this season and counts how many times Nene said everyone else is right. Ten times. Kenya said they cut a lot out but it was pretty much her response to everyone. Andy is not so ass kissy to Nene when she is not there. He is actually being almost nice to Kenya.
Daisy says she is better and has her “twirl back”
I am two episodes behind on this so I thought I would get on the new season. I’m not going to do an extensive recap on these two shows. I’ll just make a few comments.
It looks like Fredrik and Ryan are going to be jackholes to Luis AGAIN this season. This season, Ryan is going to propose to his girlfriend. I could swear we already did that in a park with an orchestra or something. Am I making that up?
Luis’s problems with the movers and his client being homeless like Bethenny. are giving me major anxiety just to watch. For some reason I really want things to go smoothly for him. I’m already worried that Luis won’t be able to sell the house in two month and his clients will be living under the bridge with Bethenny again.
Ryan and Fredrik are working together on a project needling Luis about it. They are even making fun of Luis’ Maserati !
Luis still needs a girlfriend. So he is on Tindr. Who is that beautiful assistant he is talking to? Is she single? Oh her name is Ronita. She is perfect. She needs to be single. They are perfect together.
Can someone explain to me why the premier episode was an hour and 16 minutes long? Continue reading
Seriously? They are going to do blondes versus brunettes? Just ridiculous.
Every time we have one of the shows I begin by predicting there will be NO secrets revealed. But lord knows this time there are some juicy one out there. I wonder if it was too late to edit this episode since Kim was arrested?
Lisa Rinna wrote a sex book called The Big Fun Sexy Sex Book. Apparently, Lisa used to have a sex expert come over to parties and teach the party goers how to give really good blow jobs. LVP points out she doesn’t need any tips in that area. They also replay the scene where Rinna talks about doing Playboy when she was seven months pregnant and when she was not pregnant.
Yolanda claims she is looking to downsize because the house is just too much work. It is odd that the Fosters put pretty much every property they have on the market at the same time. Mauricio takes her to look at properties but she doesn’t like any of them.
Kim and LVP both want grandchildren. And we see LVP in JEANS. JEANS! Have we ever seen that before? Continue reading
I’m sorry I have been remiss on recapping Blood, Sweat & Heels. I really like this show and need to make it more of a priority, I just finished zipping through last week. I find myself feeling much different about everyone this season than I did last season. I don’t know how Bravo manages to flip the script like this but they do it to me all the time. I’m having lots of compassion for Daisy and her fight with cancer. My absolute favorite from last year Demetria seems to have a stick of some sort lodged up her butt this season that I hope is just due to wedding stress and writing and self-publishing another book. For some reason I felt so bad for Geneva when she went through her arrest that I tweeted her support and y’all know I don’t tweet the reality show participants very often and scold you all when you tag me in a tweet with them. I even find Mica endearing this season. So I am kind of confused about my perspective.
Anyway I loved tonight’s episode on fashion week. Kenya Moore and Cynthia Bailey were on and interviewed by Daisy at the Michael Costello show. That was a fun cross over even if it was only a “who are you wearing?” sort of thing. I’m majorly impressed that Geneva is doing a piece for Italian Vogue. Continue reading
It’s time to start using my purple pen on the RHONY. I thought I would start with Bethenny but hers was just her telling us that she is ready to share with us again and repeating why she left before and what happened in the interim. Carole on the other hand has some interesting things to say.
I’m going to say it right now: This is the best season this show has ever had. It was for me. I laughed, I cried. I met a handsome man.
I think her new boyfriend is probably the main reason she is so excited about the season. I spared you the first part of her blog where she used a bunch of Shakespeare titles to describe the episode because, trying to hard. I think that is my primary issue with Carole in fact. It’s not that I don’t like her, it’s just that she seems to be trying too hard. Continue reading
Time to take the purple pen to Lisa Vanderpump’s blog. Apologies if I am a bit harsher than you would like.
Aargh here we are again. As I sit here in the waiting room as my husband undergoes surgery for another hip replacement, I ponder and reflect on the truly important things in life, and what have I learnt over the last few years?
That when you marry a much older man you eventually spend a lot of time playing nursemaid? That swans may look regal but they are mean as fuck and shit everywhere? That when a waitress starts rumbling about sexual harassment you might want to have a plan in place to deal with such things as quickly and quietly as possible so you don’t end up losing the whole restaurant?
I know that participating in a reality show has been a learning curve for sure, how remaining stalwart in my resolve, to expose all aspects of my life and learn from the consequences…Even moments in our off-time–Kyle and I in the dressing room–are an accurate depiction of our relationship: laughter, good-natured banter that you would never in a million years dream would be aired.
Both of you seem so shocked to discover that a man was standing there with a big camera and another dude was holding a giant boom over your heads. I get it, you didn’t think it would be that interesting. I think it was the whole LVP talks about diarrhea thing that interested production. Continue reading
Photo of Kyle in Spain.. Instagram
This week Kyle makes up for missing last week by giving us a double dose of RHOBH reunion reactions.
I’m so sorry about not writing my blog last week. My kids have been on spring break, and the last thing I wanted to do was think of the reunion and all of the emotions that I felt that day. I have been trying to put it behind me, but obviously it’s not easy to do when it’s played out all over again. I will do my best to combine last week and this week but not go on too much.
Seeing Yolanda so weak and vulnerable was so sad! She is always such a pillar of strength that all of us were taken aback to see her in such a fragile state. Continue reading
It’s a sunny day in Southern Cali, and I’m having fun hanging with my BFF Darrin. It’s our birthday shopping day, which is always fun.
You know who refers to L.A. as “Southern Cali?” Someone from New Orleans. Apparently, when the boys are on spring break with Eddie and Leann, there is no need for an ode to the two little spawn for public relations purposes. Also, stop trying to make Bravoistas work.
Argh, the reunion. What is there to say? It was as fun for me to endure then as it was for me to relive a second time for you all. Ha, clearly I’m kidding! Watching it unfold as opposed to experiencing it only makes me wish I had a second chance to ignore those who didn’t deserve an answer. I’m combative by nature but tired of the game.
I see we have given up even the smallest attempt at writing in the voice of a drunken 40 something with the IQ of a parasitic nematode. Continue reading
As you might imagine, my mother was an interesting woman with very strong opinions. #AppleTree During her time, people did not have allergies, or asthma or lots of other things like broccoli or lawns with grass. It’s amazing the things we think always were isn’t it? So even when such things arrived she continued to deny the existence of some of them. Like seasonal allergies. We don’t believe in them in my family. I’m only half kidding. I say this to say that since I am forbidden by maternal doctrine to have allergies; I do not. But when the pollen count is in the mid four figures, as it is today, I feel some kind of way. My face feels dead, my eyes take effort to remain fully open. And I feel as though I’ve taken an “in-flight with high turbulence” level of Xanax when I have in fact had none. I tell you this longass story as an apology, in advance, for today’s lack luster blogging efforts.
Is it just me or does the last episode of Real Housewives of Atlanta seem like it happened three weeks ago? This week Only Phaedra, Kenya, Cynthia and Claudia submitted blogs and all used the question format provided by Bravo for I thought I’d just purple pen them all at once. Continue reading
Lots of discussion about Bethenny being “homeless.” Ramona looks good.
They showed a clip of Kim reading a text from Lisa Rinna that really didn’t say anything worse than she has already said. There is an ominious “You better be careful or I will fuck you up! Stop telling lies.”
There is a crazy clip from next week when Bethenny and Ramona are talking outside with a white picket fence between them. Ramona is clearly off her meds and treating Bethenny like she is the crazy one. It looks fantastic!
Andy talks to Ramona about her behavior on the reunion. Ramona says she was very offensive. Andy accurately corrects her saying she was defensive. Ramona wrongly corrects Andy and incorrectly defines both defensive and offensive. Andy just smiles and nods and says “Oh sweetie” quietly inside his head. A couple of people in the clubhouse are laughing loud. Andy forges ahead saying she would not answer any of his questions about Mario and as stonewalling him. Continue reading
We start this episode with Andy asking a stupid question. Raise your hand if you are shocked. I see no hands. He asks Eileen why such an awarding winning actress would do RHOBH. Um, Andy, you pay these hyenas way more than actual trained actors make. Which by the way is the whole OPPOSITE of the point of doing reality TV shows. They are supposed to work for peanuts.
They play a montage that is heavy on the fact that Eileen has an Emmy. Both Kim and Brandi are throwing up a little bit in their mouths. THIS is what jealousy looks like. A viewer ask, “You were a fan of Eileen before the show, what do you think of her without a script.” Brandi says, “I don’t really think of her.” You know except for every waking moment. Eileen was said she thought Brandi was funny when they first met and then the wine toss just put a kink in things. Eileen says that there were many ramifications about Brandi’s comments about her being a homewrecker. People started calling Vince’s ex-wife trying to get tabloid stories. She had to have unpleasant conversations with her children. Brandi seems incredulous that her behavior had ramifications for Eileen. Brandi says it was always already on the Internet. Eileen says that she is great friends with Vince’s ex-wife. Eileen tells Brandi to shut the fuck up. They exchange several rounds of fuck yous! Eileen is on the verge of tears. Brandi looks awful and not just on the exterior. Brandi goes in on LVP about being friends with Kyle. Lisa Rinna and Brandi are arguing at a decibel only dogs can hear. Rinna freaks out and says that Brandi needs to be shut down. Brandi says Rinna needs to change her Depends because she is so full of shit. This is too much to give you all the blow by blows but it is bang away on Brandi time and not in the way she is used to. Rinna says fuck you (that is two housewives to tell her that within five minutes.) Brandi makes another Depends jab and Rinna responds with, “Where is your tampon endorsement!” I die. Continue reading
So my favorite Brandiloon emails me today and asks me about this show with Kim Biermann and Nene Leakes driving cross country. The poor dear has clearly started happy hour early on the west coast. Right? Because this can’t be a real thing, RIGHT? And then I got my daily NBCu updates for the day. I thought maybe it was April Fools Day, but no… we have two more days for that. It’s actually a thing.
Bravo also announced renewals for Ladies of London season two, Don’t Be Tardy… season four, Million Dollar Listing Los Angeles season eight and Manzo’d with Children season two. Let me pull out my purple pen and discuss these new shows with you. Continue reading