I really dislike when people on the Internet make a medical diagnosis of people on reality TV. But it’s evident that something is wrong with Ramona. When I was paying my last therapist, I noted a diagnosis on my bill. I can’t remember the exact wording. In the past it was depression and generalized anxiety disorder. But this was something new. The word situational was used. After a lot of reflection and a bit of probing with my therapist I came to learn that the “situation” was menopause. Menopause has made me crazy. Or crazier. So we worked on ways to minimize impact and develop coping skills. Menopause is not for pussies. So I am not going to judge Sonja, but I am going to point out that her memory, grasp on reality and behaviors are not within societal norms. I also recognize the coping tool of enormous amounts of wine. Been there. Still do that. Working on it.
Menopause is hard enough but going through a public divorce after twenty-five years of marriage while THE CRAZY is happening gives some perspective to Ramona’s poor coping skills. It doesn’t excuse the behavior, but it does provide a framework for comprehending it. So let me take my purple pen in hand with as much compassion as I can muster from the place of my own struggles with THE CRAZY.
From Ramona’s blog:
Sometimes it takes an overwhelming breakdown to have an undeniable breakthrough. That is exactly what happened to me in this week’s episode.
While watching myself back and thinking about all that happened that night at Dorinda’s, I truly know that however I behaved—or as I say reacted—to Bethenny was truly a burst of so many things I have wanted to say. I was so frustrated at the way things were going.
So right out of the gate, Ramona sticks to her “she started it” lie.
She didn’t even give me an opportunity to explain why I said what I said that night at dinner in the Hamptons. That is so frustrating. So manipulative.
I presume she is talking about associating Bethenny’s child with an R rated B movie Bethenny made a million years ago. It was an inexcusable attack on Bethenny made on camera. Bethenny attempts to be friends or friendly acquaintances with Ramona during the off season. Bethenny pointed out that Ramona could have spoken to her about her “worries about Bryn” when the story broke and filming was on hiatus. She chose to do it on TV. There is no “why” that changes that fact.
Bethenny really knew that she was going to push my buttons enough for me to react the way I did. What I am most sorry about now is that I let it happen. I should have just been as cold and indifferent the way she was.
Revisionist history! Bethenny told Ramona she was not a good friend to her. Ramona seemed stupefied by the comment so Bethenny listed several really bad things that Ramona had done to Bethenny. She was presenting her case regarding why she feels that Ramona was not a good friend to her.
I did think I had a friendship with Bethenny. It may not have been the perfect friendship, but it was a friendship. I think I missed the signals for sure that she really didn’t care enough ever to be my friend, except when she needed me or needed something from me. She never really cared about us. It’s never one-sided, that is for sure, but certainly not jealously. I have no reason to be jealous of her.
Bethenny has accepted a million apologies from Ramona only for Ramona to continue to do things to malign her. For whatever reason, Bethenny has always had a soft spot Ramona and Sonja.
Then when I watched how she talked about me during her interviews! Wow, yes wow, like really! How mean can she get? She really is a bully. I do not think she realizes what she says to others, nor do I think she really cares. That’s not about being BReal or BStrong. I call it BBully.
You can’t always play the victim while being the bully.
See? This is the opposite of what occurred. This happens with the crazy. I’ve gone off on someone who didn’t deserve much like Ramona did. I was frustrated. I had a faulty perception of the situation. I was angry well beyond a level proportionate to the situation. But THE CRAZY, at least for me, waxes and wanes. There are intermittent periods of sanity that seem to be increasing as I come out the other side. During the periods of sanity I realize I fucked up. I feel guilt. I attempt reconciliation. I accept responsibility. It appears that at no time in the last six months did Ramona feel any guilt for her treatment of Bethenny and even now claims to be the victim. I would be mortified if my irrational meltdowns were recorded and played out on national television. It’s bad enough when I memorialize them on Twitter. 🙂 Does Ramona have no shame or remorse about her behavior at all? That must be nice. I suppose.
In closing, just to clarify something, I did not leave my guest room at Dorinda’s a mess. I actually packed for Sonja (as you saw). I did make the bed!
As far as the paint coming off in the corners of the room, that happened because when I went to go to sleep that night everyone was already asleep. My room was lit up like a football stadium at a night game, because the lights from filming were all still up. I know that in the past the crew uses double-sided tape to put them up, so I just pulled them down. I guess I was stronger than I thought! Therefore, yes, the paint came off the wall. A little freshening up with a new coat of paint never hurt a room!
Wow. Dorinda really should sue Ramona for the damage to her house. And never speak to her again. Ramona may have THE CRAZY. It may not be something Ramona has a lot of control over. But that doesn’t mean Dorinda or Bethenny have to subject themselves to it. The both have enough of their own crazy without borrowing any of Ramona’s.
So she’s not sorry for her cruelty to Bethenny. She’s not sorry for destroying Dorinda’s house. Perhaps deep down under all the crazy she is a narcissistic bitch at heart. Even Bethenny eventually apologized to Luann for her horrendous attack on her last season in the Berkshires.