Hey you guys, I am filling in for this episode of Drag Race. Sorry about the delay. Your usual recapper, the divine The Lady Cocotte had life get in the way last weekend, and I have been swamped and unable to get anything up on this episode myself. I am going to make this a quick and dirty recap. I am not the expert that The Lady Cocotte is so apologies in advance.
Last week Aja was sent home and when all the queens head back into the makeup room the shade is being thrown left and right. With my poor facial recognition skills I have to admit it is hard for me to keep up with who is who in their every changing drag looks. That is except for Valentina. The judges told Valentina she was perfect once again, despite denying her a win. If it were up to me this season would be called Valentina and the Rest. Valentina is a drop dead gorgeous female and a hot as hell male. Valentina is all I care about this season.
Peppermint and Farrah Moan are the only two who have not won a challenge. Trinity in particular enjoys pointing this out. It looks like these two will be the next two to go home. Especially Farrah who tends not to get good reviews ever. Except from me. I like Farrah and I found the comment comparing her to Jon Benet Ramsey in extremely poor taste.
The Mini Challenge
This week’s mini challenge is a reading contest. I shall try to hit the highlights and low lights.
Alexis, Broadway is calling! In this case it’s the one in Brooklyn where the whores work.
Shea, you remind me of my favorite movies, your fashion? Coming to America. And your smile? Jurassic Park.
And the rest…
Peppermint was sort of middle of the pack for me. Alexis Michelle was too crude to be funny. Trinty failed to impress. Everyone seems to be making really personal attacks on Shea Couleé about her teeth and her poor hygiene. To me it came off really harsh and not funny.
Valentina said that Alexis Michelle is very Broadway, but also very broad while making a gesture across her shoulders. Nina said that Alexis Michelle is like a BMW, body made wrong. Farrah Moan said to Alexis Michelle, “Pillsbury called, they want their rolls back.
Valentina won the challenge and a trip to Palm Springs and the right to choose the order of the maxi challenge. Alexis volunteers to take either first or last. I thought Sasha Velour was better.
But none of that matters. What matters is that Alexis big fat feelings were hurt. SWIDT?
The Maxi Challenge
For the Maxi Challenge, the queens have to roast Michelle Visage. Supposedly, Michelle does not know she is this years honoree. As the queens prepare to write their material, Alexis Michelle says, “Here’s a tip, don’t make it about my body.”
Shea Couleé who I felt was really attacked harshly about her body seems to side with Trinity and Nina who basically feel like Alexis Michelle needs to get over it. Valentina immediately apologizes for her joke which was the least offensive of the bunch.
Valentina has the most hysterical scene in the show when she gets writers block and does a long prayer to Saint Guadalupe. I spent way too much time trying to find that whole thing so you will have to settle for the gif above.
When RuPaul does his Tim Gunnesque mentoring with the girls, Alexis Michelle brings up the perceived body shaming during the mini-challenge. I was dismayed with the way RuPaul and Ross Matthews handled the situation. They challenge was supposed to be all in good fun. If someone’s feelings were truly hurt, I think a little compassionate could ameliorate the entire situation. When Ru talks to Farrah, she says she felt badly about her comments about Alexis Michelle and wants to stay true to her integrity when roasting Michelle Visage. Ross says there is a way to compliment someone before the shade comes to show the lack of ill will. Rupaul says that Farrah needs to win something if she wants to stay.
Peppermint says this is her first roast and she feels confident in her comedy. Sasha Velour says she is worried that she a bit too intellectual to be as funny as the others. Sasha has writers block. All she has is the term, “Mutton dressed as lamb.” That made me laugh out loud. Smart people can be funny too, Sasha. Later Sasha has to explain the joke to Nina.
Peppermint tells a story of making a connection through Moscow while presenting as female and being detained. That must have been so frightening. According to Sasha, cross dressing is illegal in Russia.
At the roast, Shea Couleé gets off to a great, if terribly crude, start. She ends by saying that if you like her, her name is Shea Couleé if you didn’t her name is Nina Bo’nina Brown. I thought she did great.
I though Sasha did great and I loved her for coming after Tamar Braxton, one of the guest judges. Sasha makes a lot of Jersey jokes.
Valentina says that Michelle knows how to say ‘harder’ in six different languages. This was not Valentina’s best night. She could be in the bottom.
Or not, the person in the country girl outfit was REALLY bad. Who is that? I will edit it in later.
Farrah Moan completely bombs. It was completely cringeworthy.
Peppermint looked FAB U LOUS and her routine was even better.
Nina Bo’nina was an grandma whose joke were hit and miss. Mostly a miss.
Last up was Alexis Michelle who painted herself green for some unknown reason. She says in honor of her big night she wore Michelle’s favorite color. She calls Fortune a bull dyke. No one laughs at any of her jokes. No one. Dead silence. As Valentina said, “This is not a happy ending. And it doesn’t help that Alexis Michelle looks like She Hulk.”
Nina and Valentina are safe. In other words there were three people worse than they were.
Shea Couleé, Peppermint and Sasha Velour were the top queens. Oh, that was TRINTY in the hayseed ensemble. She sucked and was on the bottom. But the good news for her is that Farrah and Alexis Michelle sucked harder.
Peppermint finally pulls off her first win. It was far and above the best set. Wait, Valentina won a four night stay in Palm Springs for the mini challenge and Peppermint gets a consultation on a very inexpensive webhosting site?
The lip sync was to Dolly Parton’s Baby I’m Burning. Alexis manages to win with a sprint into a split. Farrah Moan gets sent home.
I am sorry this recap was not anywhere near The Lady Cocotte’s standards. It was all very difficult for me to get through. The brain fog has been terrible lately and trying to keep out with who is who in and out of drag was frying my brain. Due to The Lady Cocotte’s schedule, I believe I have another fill-in or two in the future. I will try harder next time. Promise.