As the housewives arrive in the Hamptons, Bethenny points out the lovely Indian Summer day. Of course Carole points out that it is actually Global Warming. Even the Global Warming nuts don’t call it that anymore Carole. Once someone pointed out to the apocalyptic scientists that the earth’s climate has gone through stages of heating and cooling since time began, they decided to go with climate change. Everyone is still in a frenzy about it, but we are starting to get our aerosol cans back. Southern women and graffiti artists have joined together in wild celebration over that minor win over the doomsday scientists.
My desire to be more open to Ms. Frankel this season is being made a lot easier by her comments about Sonja. Because I have always been Team Bethenny in the Tipsy Girl fiasco. I think most everyone would be but Sonja doesn’t have a pot to piss in and Bethenny is rich as fuck, so folks feel like Bethenny should let Sonja use her brand to break off a promotional check for herself. Those people are morons. The idiot Peter who is trying to make a living off RHONY and Bethenny in particular needs to go pound rocks. And allegedly he has back in Connecticut.
Tinsley tells us in her confessional that Sonja needs to shut the fuck up about fucking Tom if she wants to be friends with Luann. Oh, Tinz, Sonja never listens to reason. Meanwhile, Dorinda and Luann are chatting about Sonja’s bad behavior. Dorinda, nice sweet Dorinda, pulls out her phone to show us all several photos of Sonja being humped doggie style by a stripper and Luann’s engagement party. Dorinda is done being kind to Sonja. Can you blame her? She has been trashing both Dorinda and Luann for over a year! Dorinda and Lu plan to kill Sonja with kindness, as a lady does. But I don’t think Dorinda is going to be able to do that all weekend. Perhaps she will prove me wrong.
Carole is obsessed with the election. It is in three days. I know a lot of people like Carole and most of them were quietly ignored by me for several months. I know many of you do not want to relieve the election, and I don’t particularly want to live it through Carole, but it was real life at the time this was filmed and I feel as though it has to be included. Bethenny is over Carole and her haughty political dissertations. Bethenny takes Carole for acupuncture and cupping to see if it helps.
Just when I am in a peaceful place on my journey to appreciate Bethenny more, they arrive at dinner and Bethenny says to Carole, regarding the owner, “Oh Luann will be blowing this guy by midnight.” It’s bad enough that she said it on camera, but she said it right in front of the guy. Luann owns property there. That was so unnecessary.
Ramona has taken up some sort of affectation of a valley girl in her confessional. It’s like, “Oh my god! I just got back from visiting Avery at the campus and everyone was like so in love with me!” What is wrong with this woman?
Carole is going to have an election party. It’s bipartisan, as long as you’re with her.
Ramona is such a cunt. She is claiming that she saw the nude photos of Bethenny online at college with her daughter. She’s literally blaming Avery for her incessant Googling of all things RHONY. Speaking of, Oh HAY RAMONA! I don’t think I even blogged about there being some clips from a movie that Bethenny did with a sex scene in a bed. I think maybe there was a nipple or two involved if that. People made a big deal out of it. And Ramona, in all her infinite wisdom, with pretty much half the cast already mad at her decides to piss of Bethenny with this crap. Ramona asks her if she has explained the situation to Brynn. What the fuck is wrong with her. Bethenny says, ” At six, yeah, Diane Sawyer came to her schoolyard and approached her about it.” Of course the show the scandalous headline from the site that makes crap up more often than not. Bethenny says her boobs looked good in the movie. Everyone is looking at Ramona like she is a moron.
Bethenny’s has HUGE dark circles under her eyes during her confessionals. Her makeup must have worn off. She was going through A LOT at this time. This makes Ramona look even worse. Ramona thinks Bethenny is upset with her. I don’t. I think Bethenny is feeling more superior to Ramona than Carole at that moment.
Ramona basically said that Bethenny is doing porn and it’s all over the Internet. Then Ramona gets pissed at Ramona for making her look like a fool. See? This being Team Bethenny is not that hard. As long as she lays off of Lu and Dorinda, I’m fine with her. Bethenny is putting Lu in her place at the moment, but she deserves it. And Ramona says that Bethenny is not good with people. This is sort of true, but Ramona, at least right now, is a lot worse. And Luann, who prides herself on being a lady should have zipped her lip. Luann brings up that Bethenny doesn’t care about any of them. And? How many seasons have you been filming with this bitch? Why get involved in a squabble of this caliber? Ramona and Sonja don’t give two shits about you either Luann. So stop fucking defending anyone other than Dorinda! This is not rocket surgery.
Bethenny and Carole leave. I don’t blame them a bit. Carole points out that Bethenny is going through a LOT at the moment with Jason and she doesn’t need to sit around and be insulted on camera. NOT.TODAY. Apparently, nothing worth taping happened after Bethenny left. This is why she gets paid what she does.
Sonja was supposed to stay with Ramona. But Ramona I thought chose Dorinda to stay at her house over Sonja whom she disinvited. But Dorinda is staying with Luann. So Sonja is staying at
a house that Bravo provided her friend’s house with Tinsley. Apparently, it was not available for the first night. Why is Sonja toting a hat box with her luggage?
It’s hot in the ATL, so I have my windows open of avoid starting the air conditioning bills. I live near an Air Base and I only hear them when there is A LOT going on. Tonight I can barely hear the TV do I am really behind. This is not a frequent even and always makes me wonder if I have enough in the Zombie Closet. I do not. I am out of water. Tomorrow I will fix that.
Lu, Dorinda and Ramona go to lunch. Ramona thinks she is suddenly allies with Lu now that she attacked Bethenny. Really? That was her plan? To try to draw Lu over to her side? It may work temporarily, but Lu is not a fan of Ramona either. And she has Dorinda in her pocket. And vice versa.
I do not like the direction of this conversation. It’s reality suicide for Lu and Dorinda to side with Ramona on anything, let alone against Bethenny and Carole. Wow, now this is getting good. Sonja apparently can’t even get her cronies at the ever devolving Page Six anymore to plant her crap stories. She has now had to go to a Facebook Group. A FACEBOOK GROUP. At least there are crap sites that would give her some money for her heating bill if she went to them. She goes to a FACEBOOK GROUP to disparage Dorinda? Are they sure it was her? I love Facebook Groups. I wish I had time to spend at them. I appreciate when members of Facebook Groups give me information. But I had no idea it had come to this for Sonja. Why not go straight to TMZ? Is Bravo not backing TMZ stories on RHONY like they do for RHOA? I don’t get this!
Sonja is TRASHING Lu’s wedding. And Dorinda’s relationsip. WHAT IS WRONG WITH RAMONA AND SONJA THIS SEASON? Both of them are alienating everyone before filming gets started good. So Bethenny is so pissed at Ramona, she is refusing to film at the party. Carole is not happy with her on behalf of Bethenny, now Luann, Dorinda and Ramona are mad at her for her Facebook comments. And Sonja at the time was crying about Bethenny and her little friends were contacting GLORIA FUCKING ALLRED trying to get her to take a ridiculous case. Sonja has lost her mind and needs a friend. Ramona should be that friend because everyone is soon to hate her too. But Sonja is now fucking that up as well. On a FACEBOOK GROUP. Sorry. I cannot stress that enough.
Meanwhile, Tinsley is already laying the groundwork with Sonja to be friends with Dorinda. Tinz is one smart cookie.
It’s time for Ramona to host her party in the house she bought before she got married according to her. That was not shade, I didn’t know that. She says it is her testament to what she did all on her own. I’m going to need you guys to tell a hundred friends about this place, so I can buy a nice place all on my own before I die as well. Psst. I hit 10K REAL FOLLOWERS, nothing purchased on Twitter today. Just throwing that in there. I block tons of people and I wanted my followers to be real people so when I take time to broadcast my posts there are now 10K REAL PEOPLE who might actually click the link! Thank you all so much. It’s taken just over five year or so I think, but I DID IT! Sorry. Shameless plug over.
Meanwhile, back on the show, Dorinda’s social media manager who has eyes everywhere, has sent her more information on what Sonja is saying on the Facebook Group. Newsflash: Dorinda’s “friend” is her social media manager. This will come up later in the season about who exactly that is. Allegedly. How would I know? Dorinda is drinking co-cola out of a Merlot glass. God I love Dorinda.
Sonja arrives, saying her MO is “decorum.” I think I just spewed Merlot on the keyword. Urgent delay while I wipe that up.
NEXT WEEK: DORINDA GOES OFF ON SONJA, and I cannot wait for this. Sonja tries to pretend she was invited to the wedding and Lu makes sure everyone knows she was not. Tinsley flips over to Dorinda’s side. I don’t see why the word from
produc people is that Tinsley was a flop. She seems to be doing EVERYTHING right and I love her so far. What could possibly have happened? Is it possible that a certain website that rhymes with Gaydar Devine kept planting so many seeds in social media that people just repeated it? So far, Tinsley is EVERYTHING! Oh speaking of Tinsley, and this may be the problem, she is apparently being represented by one of Sonja’s wayward friends. He sent out an email asking if anyone wanted to interview her a week or so ago. I want nothing to do with that guy. I ignored it. I love Tinsley though.