It’s time for the RHONY and I’m hoping I can get this recap up in a timely manner; however, we’ve had bad storms all day and the worst is yet to come. I’ve got the tornado station ready to flee to at any moment. The problem is I won’t have tornado warning on Bravo so I’ll be checking online a lot. Anyway, I am hoping that this episode is kind of boring so the recap can be quick and dirty.
Not surprisingly, we start with Bethenny at her office where she is met by Fredrik. I love Fredrik to death so this Bethenny scene just got a whole lot better. Bethenny has hired Fredrik to see her Tribeca apartment that she recently wrenched away from Jason. Fredrik has staged it beautifully. Fredrik agrees to all Bethenny to up the listing price to $6,995,000. He got a full price all cash off within a day.
Bethenny got two new dogs for her storyline. Allegedly. Dogs as a story line annoy me. Carol comes over and unloads about the presidential election. Carole has done nothing but watch the news for weeks. Like literally nothing else. She is so excited about Hillary’s win. Bethenny is giving nothing up about her political views but she keeps trying to shut Carole up to no avail.
Sidenote: No tornado yet but we just had an earthquake. What a day!
Luann meets up with Dorinda on the way to play squash to catch her up on the wedding plans. Dorinda is the only RHONY invited to the wedding for obvious reasons. Luann did not allow Bravo to film the wedding. Dorinda asks if Sonja was invited. Dorinda refuses to say Sonja’s name. Dorinda has been mad at Sonja since the reunion. Sonja has been trashing Dorinda all over town. Sonja still holds a grudge over not being invited to the Berkshires for a Christmas party last season. She will be invited this season but it may be her last time ever. But we still have a few episodes before that all goes down.
Luann makes it clear that Ramona is not any better. She says that Ramona called Tom’s ex girlfriend in California in the middle of the night digging for information. Ramona and Sonja will both be shunned by Luann and Dorinda this season. Ramona pretended to know something else about Tom at the reunion but in the end she had nothing.
Depsite Luann and Dorinda making fun of Sonja’s sex play performance, we are apparently going to back up a bit and watch some of Sonja’s rehearsal. She acts like she was summoned by the Queen to perform in Hamilton. It’s a two week gig and her replacement was Golnesa Gharachedaghi, It was a gig for reality folks.
Later, Bethenny stops by Sonja’s place to pick up donations for Dress for Success. Sonja says she doesn’t want to sell the townhouse but it is inevitable. That’s a lie. In actuality, Sonja has tried to sell the townhouse multiple times. Then she talks about Luann and how she is still resentful. Bethenny asks if she is invited to the wedding. She says she was invited but she can’t go because she’ll be in Phuket. That’s a like no RHONY was invited except Luann. Well unless you count Jill Zarin but we’ll get to her later. It seems like a lot of people are butthurt that they were not invited. Including Bethenny who said she would only go if Bravo paid her and she could stock the bar with her product.
Bethenny insults all of Sonja’s donation. Sonja holds up a purple dress that still has the price tag from TJMaxx or somewhere attached. She says she used to wear that dress when she was dating Prince Albert in Monaco. My God that delusion runs so deep.
Ramona didn’t just rennovate her face for the new season, she is renovating her apartment as well. She’s quite inappropriate with her new boyfriend.
Dorinda stops over to see Ramona for lunch and Ramona was out on a lunch date with a guy. Ramona tells Dorinda that she actually enjoyed seeing John recently.These bitches talk trash about Dorinda’s boyfriend all the time. Ramona wants to talk trash about Luann now. She is pissed that Luann didn’t invite her to the bridal shower. Luann has made it very clear that she doesn’t want any bullshit at he wedding events. Ramona acts like she wasn’t a cunt to Luann at the reunion pretending that she had something on Luann. Now she is sitting her trashing her relationship and talking about how it is an open marriage which Luann had publically denied. So even if it is, she doesn’t want that out there. This is why Ramona will have another season of being shunned. She can’t make it through one episode without trashing someone. At the reunion Ramona is going to cry victim. Ramona is spreading gossip about Luann hitting on someone the previous night. I don’t believe that rumor for a minute.
Dorinda stops by to check in with Carole. Adam apparently lives there. We have to hear Carole say Kit-ins repeatedly before Dorinda sits down. Carole says she and Adam are not living together they are shacking up. That implies less commitment. Dorinda and Carole catch up and she says that until the last reunion, no one had ever called her a mean girl. Well thank God Dorinda brought that fact to her attention then. Dorinda takes it back. Sigh.
I love that we get to film at her UES penthouse apartment that she married into. It’s gorgeous. It has so much outdoor space. I’d marry almost anyone just to live there. Luann had the grand wedding she always wanted when she married Tom.
Luann meets Ramona for lunch and confronts her about her Nancy Drew activities regarding Tom. Ramona of course denies it and says that people come to her with information and she ignores it because she knows that Luann doesn’t want to know. Ramona brings up terrible rumors about Tom in detail to Luann. Luann says that she and Tom are in love, they are not in an open relationship. She says that Tom is doing terrible things. She hopes she doesn’t fall on her face with him. She is such a cunt.
The weather is getting super bad so I’m going to have to hit publish while I can.