This season, though… I mean rape and drugging allegations, abusive men, Phaedra’s blasphemy. This episode is going to be the worst. I feel it already.
We start at the rape dinner. Kandi is reading aloud from one of Posha’s texts. “I’m not going to rape you ON CAMERA so no worries…” And Phaedra, Kandi’s friend of several years is going to stick up for Porsha? Phaedra is going to tell Kandi, “It really doesn’t matter.” Wow. When Kandi loses it about wanting to choke Porsha out, Phaedra finally comes to Kandi’s side. Todd points out he hasn’t seen Kandi this mad since the Pillow Talk episode when everyone was fighting like professional wrestlers. Porsha continues to provoke Kandi. Wait, Porsha, I thought provoking was good cause for a beatdown in your book of Rules to Live By. Kenya gets up and returns Phaedra to her seat, because she’s making things worse. I’m shocked Phaedra let herself be led to sit down. Phaedra continues to say it’s not big deal. Cynthia says she is leaving the Kandi, Todd, and Kenya leave with her. Kandi says on the same night Porsha asked to go home with one of her friends and her husband too! Kandi leaves, still hysterical calling Porsha a “lying ass freak ho” over and over. Phaedra, Sheree, Bob and Peter stay at the table with Porsha and her deadbeat dad fake boyfriend. At this point the deadbeat dad must be thinking he’s not getting paid enough for this shit.
We go straight from that, with no commercial, to delusional Sheree calling someone named Michelle (I highly doubt there is anyone on the phone) talking about how she doesn’t want her housewarming to be “Kenya Moore style.” Oh girl, don’t worry, you housewarming won’t have any style at all. I needed a laugh after all that hysteria. Ha we heard the other side of everyone’s conversations on the phone except Sheree. I knew she wasn’t talking to anyone. Kandi calls Phaedra to tell her Porsha is uninvited from the days activities.
Phaedra shows up to Porsha and Todd’s room dressed in a bikini and a towel to break the bad news to Porsha that she has been uninvited to the day’s activities. With all the surgery Phaedra has had, has she not ever gotten boobs? She claims her suit is from when she was 18 years old. Who the hell has a bathing suit from high school in their wardrobe at her age. Then she keeps putting the suit out of her buttcrack in front of Todd. These two THOTs deserve each other. This leads to a montage of previous THOTwear these two have worn on previous trips. EW.
Kandi and Todd and Cynthia and Peter head off to the boat in one van. This explains how it is Bob and Sheree and Kenya and Phaedra in the other van.In the first car, Peter says that last night after they left dinner Porsha said she was tired of everyone bullying her. Peter and Cynthia are getting along really well. So well, Cynthia is thinking about hitting it one last time.
Phaedra continues to stick up for Porsha. After Kenya points out that Porsha is a lying liar who lies, Sheree says in her talking head that Phaedra would lie to support Porsha no matter what. This is where the conversation between Bob and Sheree happens. I am not even going to dignify Bob’s comments with a recap. You can see the clip here. This Sheree scene is making me bawl.
When the gang gets to the beach, Bob was the last one down. I presume that was because he was arguing with the crew already about the footage in the car. I have to admit I am having a hard time shaking that scene, and Sheree’s talking heads and the way he grabbed her arm/hand in the car. Sheree says that Bob has ruined her entire day. She’s trying to put on a good face so as not to ruin the day for everyone else, but she’s not enjoying this. I can only imagine. I am not enjoying this episode either. That was a really rough scene for a lot of people.
The speedboat ride looked horrible. Only Kenya seemed to love it. Way too much speed. The boaters go to dinner and Cynthia has bought new clothes. Everyone seems to think Peter and Cynthia got in on before dinner. Phaedra suggests all the ladies get together for a “restoration service” and Kenya literally laughs outloud. Peter takes the boys to the bar so the women can talk. No one is interested in Phaedra’s restoration service. Cynthia says she will do it. Kenya and Kandi could not be less interested.
Nonetheless, Phaedra is going to have the restoration service right there in her hotel room at 10:45pm. The menu includes white wine and Cheez-its. Sheree and Porsha arrive first and Phaedra asks how she is with the Bob situation.
Somehow, this whole “religious experience” is going to be about blaming Kenya for being insensitive to domestic violence. WTMF? On the very day that Kenya comforted Sheree, and was the only one to do so, Sheree is going to come for Kenya? Oh no mam. If you recall, Sheree has been mocking Kenya about Matt abusing her and telling her that it is her fault for provoking Matt. When that happened, Kenya said, “let’s talk about your abuse!” and Sheree denied being abused. So now Kenya is the problem? Why can’t this bitch Sheree ever stop deflecting and own what she said? Thank God I can go back to hating this bitch.
It’s time to start the Porsha dialogue and Porsha starts it off basically telling Kandi, “the truth hurts.” Kandi has talked about how much she has supported over the years. Production validates with this a montage of all the times that Kandi has helped Porsha out. And despite all of that Porsha continues to come for Kandi. Porsha basically admits she lied about Kandi in retaliation for Kandi saying that Porsha slept with her ex. Porsha did sleep with block. That’s a fact. Porsha has slept with a LOT of guys. Why did the fact that Kandi said Porsha slept with her ex bother her so much that she had to get back at Kandi? I don’t get it.
Two hours into to this scene, when everyone is dying to go to bed, Porsha tells Kandi that she owes Phaedra an apology. Seriously? Porsha knows Phaedra started all of the nonsense about Kandi. Porsha has taken the beating that should have been Phaedra’s in the first place. Now she want Kandi to apologize to Phaedra? What the hell does Phaedra have on Porsha??? Phaedra trips of on her own denial of having a boyfriend before Apollo went to jail. Here screw up certainly was not lost on Kenya. Or me. Phaedra stepped right in that. Kandi says that it was a big coincidence that the FEDs came to the door the day after Kandi called her out on her boyfriend. Kandi apologizes for assuming it was Phaedra. But we all know, it was Phaedra.
At the end, nobody was restored. And everyone was still pissed.
On the last day of the trip, Bob invites Sheree to the jewelry store. I would wonder if this whole situation was staged if I didn’t know how pissed Bob was about it in real time. Sheree shows up and Bob tries to cute his way out of things. Sheree said that it was not funny when it happened and it was not funny when he mocked it the day before. She has to pry herself away from him to get out of the store. Sheree cries in the car back to the hotel while Bob sits in the jewelry store laughing.
Next week: Cynthia and Peter have a meal alone together. Sheree and Bob fight some more. The girls try to throw a divorce party for Phaedra because they falsely believe she is divorced. Phaedra and Kenya fight about Apollo.