Okay, I think we only have two Charters left. How does Kelley end up pissing off Captain Lee this week when he is the only exterior crew that wasn’t part of the drunk debacle last week. How is this possible? Is it tricky editing?
I did want to mention some sad news. Nico’s brother died yesterday at the age of 21 from an undisclosed long-term illness. It was just such a sad story to tell, I didn’t want to do the post. Nico was proud that his brother was able to donate all of his organs. Sending out positive vibes to the family and friends. Sounds like he was a warrior.
It looks like Ben passed out in the master bed with Kyle and he never got to choke his chicken. Ben had to be forced by Kate to get up so the stews could clean the room. She immediately sees the dislocated panel on the bathroom wall. It looks like kids on Spring Break in a cheap Daytona Beach condo partied in there. Don’t ask me how I know this. Thank God the guys in Daytona ponied up for the BUSTED DOWN DOOR! Allegedly. But back to the show. Apparently the panel that Ben and Nico and Lauren busted houses the wiring and stuff for the fancypants toilet the boat has that is similar to the on in the master at Moore Manor. Those toilets range from $10K – $40K and if it is broken they are screwed and will have to cancel the remaining charters or have no master bathroom.
Captain Lee lays into the four idiots that demolished the bathroom. Kelley and Kate also got their asses chewed out. Just last week, and even on his blog, Captain Lee said Kelley did the right thing by going to bed early. And we know Kate can do no wrong. This is the maddest Captain Lee has ever been. He tells Kelley not to stick his head in the sand. He has confined the four of them to their quarters and while he is venting and admonishing Kelley and Kate he can hear them laughing. He says if he catches any of them out of their quarters tonight, he will “fucking go off.”
Lauren, Nico and Ben discuss their plight. Nico blames Kate for ratting on them. What exactly was she supposed to do? Ben says no one yanked the panel out, “It just popped out.” This is when they were all laughing. Kyle has all but disappeared in a cloud of anger somewhere. Kelley tells Nico and Lauren they have to be in bed by 10 pm. Nico is doing a whole lot of trash talking about Kelley. Those two have a major confrontation. Nico doesn’t seem to get what he’s done.
To make matters worse, Dean Slover is there. Ben is already on a short fuse and Dean always has high demands of Ben. And by high demands I mean he expects Ben to feed him on his schedule not whenever Ben gets around to it. This is a problem with him every season. And he is one of those people who sends things back. I’ve been known to send things back before but not like Dean. He sends lots of things back.
The obnoxious partiers just will not stop whining and blaming Kate and Kelley for their predicament. I’m not sure if this is storyline to show off the fancy toilet, or a real event.
James, Ben’s brother was allowed to come say good-bye to Ben on the boat. Ben tells him to come at 9 pm. They are all confined to quarters at 10 pm. At 10:08 they are still up and James is still there and Ben is still pissy. Captain Lee is sitting in the main salon just watching. At 11 pm Ben, James and Emily are still drinking whiskey and eating caviar and reminiscing about jolly old England in the kitchen when Captain Lee approaches. He throws out James and sends Ben to bed. Ben follows orders and kisses Emily goodnight as well.
The cameraman seems to like close, revealing shots of Nico’s underpants. By the time the time Slover and his posse arrive the bathroom wall has been fixed, and the boat is ready to go. Even Nico and Kelley are being cordial after a full night’s sleep.
The first thing they server Dean and his collection of hot, buff playthings, is a tall glass of egg salad of some sort with caviar on top. With a metal spoon. I hate caviar, but even I know you don’t serve it with a metal spoon. Ben put the spoons in the glass himself to try to avoid the caviar. I can tell already this will be the first disaster from Ben. Somehow, this course goes along with no issue. I am amazed. Maybe it was edited out. Nope, Dean comes in and gives Ben some high compliments. It seems like moments after lunch the guys are served a gorgeous charcuterie and some “skinny girl margaritas.” Oh that Bethenny. They were the homemade kind, but still.
Kelley heads off to get the fireworks that Dean Slover wanted and Ben asks him to pick up the flower arrangement he got for Emily because her birthday is within a day or two. Now Captain Lee is pissy about the flowers for no reason and Kelley is going to get an ass chewing once again. To make things worse, Kelley tapped the bow with the tinder while Captain Lee was watching. This is just ridiculous. I know they love to have a scapegoat every season, but they always pick the most unlikely people to take the fall.
Meanwhile, Kate has planned a Chinese New Year’s dinner. But she’s been pissy with Ben and Emily because she thinks their romance was the reason she got called off her break to get back on service. There is no way in hell that Kate really thought she was taking a break with her favorite charter on board in the middle of the day. Why must they over produce this show so much. I’d think the actual unscripted events would be interesting enough.
None of the guests like the duck and shrimp hot noodle dish. It looked amazing to me. They said it lacked flavor. Ben keeps saying this is the first dish he has ever had sent back. Does he think we don’t watch the show? Dean sends stuff back every season. And there have been others. Just this season the people with all the weird dietary restrictions were pissy as well. Ben tastes the dish and realizes that he dropped ice in the soup to stop the shrimp from cooking and it diluted the broth and the seasonings. Meanwhile Sierra, the worst stew ever spills gallons of broth on the floor of the main salon. Yet, she’s never in any trouble.
When Kelley got in trouble for whatever irked the Captain, Captain Lee said he was going to implement some changes. Kelley is nervous he is going to lose a stripe. Even Nico thinks that would be ridiculous.
Ben is thrilled with the flowers that he got for Emily. Ben is definitely straight. It’s quite the monstrosity. Emily loves them and that is what counts.
Captain Lee seems nicer in the morning. He decides to give Nico a second chance and tells him to take Nico and Dean to The Baths, a beach park with cool caves and rock formations in Virgin Gorda. Dean decides he doesn’t want to take the taxi ride back to the boat. He wants Kelly to bring the tinder around and they can swim out to meet him. When Kelley left the tinder to go to the swim spot with all the stuff, he told Nico that the keys were in the top of one of the coolers. But when Kelley got back to the tinder, he thinks Nico has the keys. For some reason they only took one radio and Nico has that too. How is Nico supposed to swim to the tinder with the radio? IDGI. But Kelley has to call Captain Lee and ask him to tell Nico to bring the keys. Oh, I see. Nico kept the cooler with the keys. These things happen all the time. But Captain Lee and Kate are spinning this into a whole big ordeal. What happened to island time? I am sure Dean is just fine on a gorgeous beach for an extra twenty minutes. All of these people need to take a Xanax.
But next week, Dean gets to have his requisite temper tantrum, Captain Lee will throw his dick on the table… oh wait, maybe not, we’ve all seen Kelley’s dick, that is not the kind of dick swinging contest you will win with Kelley. Captain Lee will scream at Kelley and Kyle’s girlfriend will arrive and hopefully kill Sierra. Because I really need her to get some of the manufactured punishments being doled out.