Below Deck: Decent Proposal



Okay y’all. I’ve got my big girl panties back on and I’m ready to blog Below Deck.  Thanks for all the nice shit y’all said. I’m not very good at receiving that, but I tried to take it all in. I’m quite comfortable being blunt and honest. So I should say that I’m not literally wearing my big girl panties or any panties for that matter because it was hot today and fat chicks and the heat and the nylon around the leg holes? No thank you. But in the metaphorical sense, sure.

Before the episode even starts, I can tell you me and Captain Lee are not going to get along tonight. I love me some Captain Lee.  I love his no bullshit, straightforward take on things. He’s got a very kind soul under all of that bravado. But we part ways when it comes to Kate.  We just do. And I anticipate that we are going to part ways with regard to Kelley tonight. I really do think he tends to turn a blind eye to Kate’s issues. But he’s friends with her, so it is what it is. I say this in advance of the show because someone tweeted me negatively about him on Twitter. And THAT will not fly with me. Captain Lee is all kinds of awesome. I won’t tolerate any trash talk about him in general. But, that doesn’t mean I am not going to call him out here from time to time. Okay, let’s do this!


Ro Hernandez, Instagram

Ro Hernandez, Instagram… Again with the sunglasses. Why?


We are back on the day off. Ben’s fake “I’m jealous of Ro” storyline is absurd. And because last week when I mentioned the Kate and Ro romance someone felt it necessary to tell me that Kate is in a big criminal case now for assaulting Ro, I’m just going to direct those people to click here for all of that.  I can only speak credibly about things I see on the show.

I don’t understand Emily. She’s not drawing any boundaries with Kelley. I believe the term for that is leading him on. You have to stop a man from lying between your legs, unless you want him there. You can’t allow all of his advances and then complain about his advances. Is she 12? Speaking of 12, Nico can’t get enough of the lesbian makeouts. But he is 12 so that’s normal behavior.

Production continues not to show Ro’s face. Which is weird. Is she wanted in 37 states or something?

Captain Lee tells Kelley to be more proactive with the guests. For the first time in Below Deck history, an employee is allowed to have a female lover on the boat. Double standard? I hope someone screen shot Ro’s split second walk of shame.

Things I have learned from this show. If you are rich, don’t make the crew put the slide it. It’s so not worth it.

Kyle and Sierra go off to send money to his daughter.  Normal people would find this a noble gesture. Sierra mentally decides to dump him.

It’s Valentine’s Day cruise.  And it is a surprise proposal. What could possibly go wrong?

Kate convinces Ben to send Emily flowers because she has never received any. #Meddling

Captain Lee is getting the grouchy edit this season. It’s like production wants to highlight his favoritism of Kate.  The latest example is Captain Lee telling Kelley to clean the crew mess where there was sushi strategically left out by production the night before. Do we REALLY NEED all of this made up drama?

It’s probably a good thing that Emily has never gotten a floral arrangement before because that was the most hideous bouquet in the history of the world. Thank god the only men who send me flowers is gay. Because this was just ungodly. But Emily is immediately ready to give it up. So it worked like a charm.

Ben, chef of boxed cake mixes, thinks he can make a red velvet cake? And he tried to make them cupcakes? Which he burned?

Insert random fake drama about the pool and the tinder here.  So manufactured by production. Everyone is pissed about Kelley putting the pool in before the guests asked for it.

I’m bored.

So the bride said yes before even looking at the ring. Amateur.

Kyle chartered a boat to take Sierra on a fishing date. And she invited everyone else. So he is pissed.

Ben asks Emily to dinner…that will be next week.

Sooo scripted.


Filed under Below Deck, Entertainment News

41 responses to “Below Deck: Decent Proposal

  1. liza

    I’ve never received flowers. I dated a bunch of losers who I’ve always given an out to by saying I think they are overrated, to expensive etc.. Whatever fit at the time. This episode made me realize I do want some effn flowers !!

  2. Margarett

    I hate to hear that Captain Lee was less than his wonderful self. I will still like him but now I am prepared to be disappointed in him. Thanks for the warning.

    • tamaratattles

      How do people keep misinterpreting that I think Captain Lee is anything other than awesome?

      • Margarett

        I know you like him, too. Even the most awesome of men can be an ass. ( My phone won’t let me make that plural.) Okay, women, too.

        He is not happy with his deck crew. It really was pretty frustrating watching them get the tender up there.

      • tamaratattles

        Well, the storyline is buliding to a confrontation between Kelley and Captain Lee. I am no Kelley fan, I was irritated that he even came back after his behavior on the first season, but I think he’s doing a pretty decent job and that the deck crew this season seem to be better than ever.

        The interior crew has had it’s share of problems, which apparently we are going to all overlook because Kate doesn’t feel threatened by the other two ladies. :)

        Perhaps it won’t happen at all.. but I feel like it is going to and I’m feeling some kinda way about Captain Lee’s negative assessment of Lauren.

  3. Lisa j

    Captain Lee fan club starts behind me. Did anyone hear Andy’s poll question tonight? Heard it and promptly changed the channel, what a pig

    • I fully intended to watch Bravo last night and I fell asleep. It’s the first time I’ve slept in several days so I was out cold. I woke fully clothed and wondering what pig question Andy could have asked last night. Now I’ll never know.

    • Bugg

      I turned the channel after hearing the poll too. So low brow.

      • Kara

        What did he say?!

      • Observer2

        Kara, I was wondering the same thing. I’ll try to get on On Demand and will come back here and let you know. lol

      • Observer2

        Wow! If I hadn’t already committed to answering you here, I wouldn’t put it here either. the question was, “Did you M*****b*te today?”

        My gosh! Bravo, needs to get it together.

      • tamaratattles

        Good Lord. It’s like you are all in the fourth grade. The question was absurd and Andy never fails to sink lower, but it took five of you for someone to attempt to type the word masturbate? Are you all puritans?

  4. LisaPat

    Captain Lee He is a terrible judge of character, but a very loyal person. I would venture to guess that he is part of the 2% of men who don’t cheat on their wives. Now that I am the victim of an affair, every single man in the world has me sizing him up and speculating; is he part of the 2%? is he, over there by he frozen peas, part of the 2%?

    • JoJoFLL

      I see Caprain Lee and his wife occasionally on Las Olas Boulevard and they always seem very happy and close. You can tell they’ve happily been together a long time.

  5. GillianFirst

    Glad you’re back Tamara!! Below deck is generally so low-stakes. The drama on the high seas is at its best when there’s some sort of service issue with the guests… I enjoy the rotating guests but the crew is overall boring. At least Kate stands up to Ben but blah this season…snooze. The only Bravo show I’m liking right now is Jersey, just because we’ve seen those families grow and change over time…The petty bs on OC is so grating, haven’t watched the new ep and maybe I won’t bother after your and others’ bad reviews.

  6. Brianna

    Cait looks horrible…. huge bags under her eyes, idk what it is but she’s not “the hot one” now … eek

    • Ami

      No she’s Not! Also, she has so much Botox she can barely move her mouth to speak. She is entirely way too young to have so many injections your face doesn’t move. Her and her girlfriends PDA was just over the top for me. My issue is not they were 2 girls doing it, no matter who the couple was, that much pda in public is just absolutely disgusting. When she saw the episode air I hope she realized what a freak she looked and acted like. I felt sorry for Kelley. Captian was up his ass.

    • Gertie Walker

      I noticed that too. She doesn’t look bad during the scenes of her working on the boat. But she looks so tired when talking to the camera by herself. Does anyone know how they do the one on one commentaries? Do they do it after the season is done or as they go while shooting?

  7. Wonky Tonk

    Oh I think most of us know you like Captain Lee! Captain Lee was a predictably grumpy grumpy grumpy and surprisingly he had an absolutely adorable response when questioned by Kate about how he proposed to his wife. It’s without a doubt the most vulnerable, and non-purpose-driven I think I’ve ever seen him on the show. I really enjoyed watching those fleeting seconds. He’s still reminds me of an irascible old salt though.

    Agreed on Ro I mentioned it last week, but I absolutely agree it’s weird how they keep blocking showing her face. What the heck is the purpose of that?

    The host guest, the guy who proposed, was scorching hot yeah! One of the things I really like about my Caucasian lovers is their physiological response when they’re excited, how their skin, and lips flush from angry pinks, to deep reds, and sometimes even purple, and that guy displayed all of it, but the purple during his proposal. And the girlfriend’s guttural I love you when he throws her on the heart shaped rose petal bedazzled bed…I was like me too honey, me too.

  8. Meindc

    I thought it was pretty tacky of Kate to try on the ring. To me that is not what one would expect from the “ultimate yachting experience” or whatever nonsense she says when describing her purpose.

    • D

      THIS! Yes, if someone tried on my ring I would be like ‘bitch, please’ .it’s probably all fake, but I thought the same about the ring.

    • Wonky Tonk

      Yeah, it’s not life or death or anything, but it’s an incredible invasion of that passenger’s privacy, and to do it on camera shows a complete disregard for her position as chief stewardess. Were I her supervisor she would have received either written, or oral counseling for that.

      • Ak

        I agree 100%. I was upset once, my friend put my ring on without my permission while we were on a trip. She hooked up with a guy while wearing it. I know I sound loopy, but it just seemed gross to me :(

  9. RENOB

    Wow, this episode was a total snoozefest. The lesbian makeout sessions were just too much. I don’t care enough about Kate to see all that, or enough about anyone’s relationship to see all that PDA. The host guest was quite enjoyable though, his deep voice was super sexy. Kelley needs to get laid and NOT by Emily. Sierra is such a dip, I cannot believe Kyle is actually falling for her… OPEN your eyes man, she is a nutjob. I like Kyle, he is attractive and seems like a nice dude. Overall, good recap for such a sleepy episode. Those flowers were horrendous.

  10. Gertie Walker

    I have never responded to a review before but girlfriend you hit the nail on the head. I’m not going to talk about Captain Lee because the rest of the crew drove me nuts. First thing first a man in his thirties is intimidated to ask a woman out once he gives her blue roses? We all know that this won’t lead to them sailing off into the sunset. Second, what is so great about Emily? All the men want to get with her. She isn’t what I’d call beautiful. (Could her glasses be any bigger) Plus she looks like she’s 14 years old. I thought she was snob when Serena told her Kelley wanted Serena to put in a good word for him. Obviously having his head in her crotch is okay but Kelley broke the the Cardinal rule when he asked Serena to do some recon for him. I’m going to watch the rest of the season simply to see the reunion show but at this point the only person I like is Lauren

  11. Bugg

    Does anyone think the whole Nico/Kelly rivalry for Emily was scripted? There was no chemistry between her and Kelley at all though he did look genuinely surprised in the clip for next week when he heard she and Ben were going out to dinner. I’ve always thought of Ben as quite the ass but he seemed truly nervous and giddy about Emily which was endearing. Seems they would make a cute couple.

  12. Happy gal

    I think Captain Lee misses Eddie who really was an excellent bosson. I know I miss
    Eddie !!!

  13. CoBe

    For some reason I can’t stop thinking of Harry Potter whenever I see Emily.

    It’s like she missed her calling when those movies were being filmed.

  14. Dancing Matisse

    Ro’s laugh – nails on a chalkboard, my friends.

  15. Observer2

    I’m glad I’m not the only one who felt like these are totally made-for-Bravo TV moments. Production is all up in this show as well as others. They are REALLY pushing their agenda way too much. Producers need to stick with producing and leave scripts and storylines to the writers.

    If you notice the crew all look at their phones quite a bit before going off to do another scene. I’m so tired of this attempted scripting crap!

    My feeling is that they are so hellbent on making sure that there is some sexual tension on the boat amongst the crew that they are pushing Emily off on each of the guys, and production is probably horrified that she keeps rejecting them. So last ditch effort is to send Ben in since he’s the only guy she hasn’t out and out rejected. Last season it was that crazy curly headed girl that production was trying to push on Eddie to see if he’d cheat on his girlfriend. That was really sad.

    Kate’s complexion reminds me of an addict’s appearance – prematurely aged and severely damaged hair, especially with meth. She looked worse at the beginning of the season, but in a lot of shots seems to get better as time goes by until Ro got there and now she’s back to looking haggard again.

    I agree with whoever said that Kelly needs to get laid. He was doing a great job until his testosterone kicked in. Now he seems to be focusing more on being a stud than doing his job. Super disappointing. I thought he’d do much better than that considering he’s following in Eddie’s footsteps.

    Ohhhh wait! Kelly the Stud is stepping on Captain Lee’s job – isn’t Bravo promoting Captain Lee as the “Stud of the Sea”?

  16. Ak

    I have a very close friend who is in production for Below Deck… They are wrapping film in Croatia and from what I’ve been told have a female captain this next upcoming season.
    Anyways, just off the cuff, Kate’s been looking like she may be drinking harder. I agree with Observer2, her gf also looks a bit rough. I think it’s constant boozing.

    • Ami

      That may be an off spin like the Mediterranean was. I can’t wait. Did your friend mention of any common crew members or all new? I’d love to see all new with only Ben and Eddie returning. I’m really burnt out on Kate. This last episide and all of the PDA sealed the deal for me. I don’t care the sex of any couple … but that PDA was over the top and I would rather watch porn then those two making out and groaning. I’m not sure Ro is playing with a full deck of cards. By the way Ro was acting she was either highly medicated or is a few French Fries short of a happy meal.

  17. T D

    Love how cute Capt. looked describing his own proposal. Was he blushing?

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