Real Housewives of New Jersey: Picking Sides

Today I was sent a bunch of court documents regarding Dolores’s husband Frank. I’m too groggy to read it all but apparently he was in some trouble as a real estate lawyer. And some previous criminal charges that had no jail time involved.  I am going to speed through this recap because I want to watch the debates live and I also am in the middle of a narcoleptic period again.

Dolores is still trying to talk Siggy off the ledge. Siggy is worried that Jac is mad at her. This entire first scene with the granite being installed is edited between at least two filming shoots. Note the disappearing electronic thingy under the cabinet by Dolores. It’s not there at the end of the scene. Clearly, they had to go back and make them say different things.

Siggy and Delores head over to Jac’s to find out if she is mad at them. She’s not. Jac says she is done with Melissa and Teresa. Siggy makes everything about her. Siggy thinks she should not go to the fashion show. Fashion shows?  It seems like the new girls are going to be on team Jac. Except for Dolores maybe. I think she will be neutral.

RHONJ Dolores on Teresa


Joe Gorga comes over for lunch with Teresa. Juicy is out visiting one of his girlfriends. Out of the blue Teresa gives her whole I didn’t do anything wrong speech about her 41 felonies that she committed.  Sure she did them, just not on purpose.  She accidently told all of those banks she was a real estate agent, and an interior designer and all of her other made up jobs. She accidently falsified W-2 forms when she had no job at all. It was all unintentional. Teresa doesn’t know how “she is going to do garbage.” Joe says he’ll come take it out for her. Really?

Siggy goes to coffee with Melissa. Siggy basically calls Melissa self-absorbed and phony and says that she can’t go to the Envy fashion show with her. And she is not going to the Posche show either. Melissa is pissed. Siggy’s confessionals are not based in any reality. She is so confused about RHONJ history she just needs to stop talking. Somehow, Melissa and Siggy end on a good note. Because they are both phony and self-absorbed.

Dolores goes shopping with her mom. They talk about how Teresa is not divorcing Joe. They talk about how Italian women are treated in their old school marriages.

rhonj jac
It’s time for the dreaded Posche Fashion show. Jac. Dolores and Kim D are having a chat. Kim D. says Teresa needs to divorce Joe or else he will be entitled to half of everything she has. Then she asks if Teresa is delusional or if she knows about Joe’s girls on the side. Jac basically says that Teresa and Joe’s relationship works for them.  Dolores doesn’t want to know the details.  There was no drama at Posche this year so we had to relive  a montage of previous brawls.

Melissa and Teresa join Dolores and Siggy for lunch. Siggy has decided that she will come to the Envy fashion show. Teresa starts trashing Jac and Dolores and Siggy shut it down. They talk about Joe going to prison.

Jac and Chris have a launch party for their popcorn line. They announce that Ashlee is pregnant. Siggy makes it all about her. Everyone there except Melissa and Tre including Kathy and Rosie.

Joe is having a going away party and he invited Chris and Jac and the kids.  Jac is not going but Chris is. Dolores tells Chris he shouldn’t go either. Chris says his plan was to just pop in and out. Dolores has no business butting into Chris and Joe’s friendship. I think she is giving him terrible advice.

Sidenote:  I think these #GucciGuilty commercials are ridiculously bad.

Teresa and Dolores go to church. There they reminisce about how their lives didn’t work out the way they had planned.  Teresa still hasn’t learned how to cross herself.

I’m going to lie down and probably fall asleep during the debate now.










Filed under Dolores Catania, Entertainment News, Jacqueline Laurita, Joe Giudice, Joe Gorga, Kathy Wakile, Melissa Gorga, Real Housewives of New Jersey, RHONJ, Siggy Flicker, Teresa Giudice

57 responses to “Real Housewives of New Jersey: Picking Sides

  1. Pamela Nichols

    So sorry !…….but shyt. Happens !

  2. tamaratattles

    Wow, Did everyone watch the debates? I’ve never had a housewives post go over an hour with no comments…

    • Yes, I know I did. I thought the most stunning comment of the night was Trump saying that Russia was NEW to having nuclear weapons! Absolutely unbelievable. Trump is the Teresa Guidice of politics.

      • SJ

        Very good line Spunky! The Tre of politics!

      • EngineerTakingABreak

        Trump did not say Russia is new to nuclear weapons, Spunky. He said Russia has new nuclear weapons, while the U.S. has old, out-dated weapons… Thanks for the re-cap, TT. Watched the debate first, then needed the non-reality of RHONJ to counter the reality of the election. Funniest line for me was Melissa admitting the worst kept secret is her nose job(s). (By the way, stopped in Envy (long story) with my daughter who happens to be built like Melissa. She found a pair of jean shorts that look better on her than any pair she’s ever owned. And it was after the summer season, so they gave her 70% off. I was hoping she would find a dress, but she’s happy, so I’m happy.). I’ll be watching the ep again with my husband, who needed a football fix after the debate. Looking forward to catching the two shoots in Dolores’ kitchen–good eye!

      • Spunky2015

        Thanks, I stand corrected.

      • So true, but not just about politics. His spin on his audacious treatment of women, minorities, and immigrants is based on pure fiction, just as Teresa’s spin on why she went to prison is equally disgusting. They are two peas in a pod, both ignorant and arrogant.

        Tamara, great recap. I have missed reading, posting, and going through all of the comments for over a week. I have missed coming to this site this week as I was away in DC for the Jewish holidays and babysitting my grandkids.

        I love coming to your site several times a day and have missed it, but I am slowly catching up. You really nailed this episode of RHNJ.

    • itwasjulie

      TT, am I in the Dawg House? I have not been able to post for months.

  3. Chloe

    I did…

    NJ bored me so much tonight. I don’t know if it was just the episode or the whole season in general. I am not feeling Siggy at all and am tired of the Criminal. I think Jac is desperate to keep her place on the show, that she creates a dramatic mountain out of a molehill concerning Teresa. The show is so devoid of storyline that stripper gate is being revisited? miss the old must-see NJ. But I guess things change and can’t remain the same.

  4. Ziggy is an idiot. Another one that cries all the time about hurt feelings. Melissa handled her well. Loved how Asslee shouted out “I just found out” about her pregnancy, fooling no one. Teresa trying to “up” the sympathy card with Joe going to camp. Jacqueline needs to go and take her popcorn with her.

  5. LisaPat

    Sorry, I’m fixated on the debates and post-debate coverage! Siggy and Dolores are doting on poor, innocent, passive Jacqueline again. When Jac murders someone, I can see her stepford husband, Chris, Siggy and Dolores asking if she is okay as she stands over the body holding a bloody knife. There has to come a point when a husband stops co-signing her behavior and recognizes that she needs help. He isn’t doing her any favors by egging on her paranoia and agreeing with her. If she was in my family, we would have had an intervention already. Unfortunately, I think her family would rather save face than save her.

  6. Briana Giselle

    OMG!!!! THANK YOU! The #GucciGuilty ads infuriate me. Such a crazy response to a ridiculous thing, I am aware.
    -Mr. Leto creeps me out
    -Fashion House fragrance commercials are totally wacko generally (since, Hi. You’re Queens. What are you doing commercials for?) but yeah. This one is yucky.
    Also, I appreciate your concise format.

  7. Mrs. Smith

    I am disgusted over the repeated public service announcement by The Criminal warning the same thing can happen to anyone. FFS!!!!

    • Minky

      Well…with this bunch that’s kind of true. Maybe Teresa knows a lot more about these broads than the viewers? Hahahahaha!!!

      Everytime I see that finger pointing photo of Jac I can’t help but think “J’accuse!” It should be her new nickname.

  8. Minky

    I didn’t watch anything tonight. Not because I didn’t want to, but because I’ve been swamped with work for the past few days.

    Siggy needs to take a chill pill and shut it. Jacqueline needs to tone it down several notches. Teresa still disgusts me. The other ones are forgettable.

    @LisaPat Chris is very similar to Joe Giudice in that regard. Their wives wear the pants in the family and their job is to just pretend like they’re in charge…and go to prison when shit gets real.

    • LisaPat

      LOL Minky! I don’t know, dear. I think Juicy stands up to Teresa at times. Chris is absolutely not the Alpha in that marriage and it’s almost like he’s afraid of Jacqueline. I can’t blame him !

  9. Betty

    This show is dumb. Used to be a fan and will read an occasional recap. Don’t give them the ratings, they’ll get fired and all be bankrupt.

  10. Swizzle

    That flashback video of Teresa and Joe Gorga dancing was beyond creepy.

  11. Rach

    What a boring episode. Siggy needs to shush. She has no clue what she’s on about at all. Delores needs to butt out, if chris wants to go and see joe at the party then he should. Ugh not a fan of this season at all.

  12. Lisa j

    Bravo has normalized criminal behavior. I’d like to see TT level #FactCheck on that tale of lies. Melissa give me a break, the nose story is the worst kept secret and how can you be mad about that? Siggy nailed you on personality, shallow and self absorbed but that pretty much sums up the entire cast. Ready to see the kid gloves Andy gives to Felon A and B. Ugh over it!

  13. SillyMe

    I totally agree about the video of Joe Gorga and Teresa dancing! He looked a little too much into it, kind of in an inappropriate sort of a way. I thought it was just me. ewwww.

  14. GeneralPsi

    Theresa: In the name of the father, the son, and the hooolllllyyyyy facejob?

  15. Jrleaguer

    Hard episode to get in to.
    Three things I am obsessed with…
    1. Siggy is a fellow MOT…but the girl exhausts me! A “Relationship Expert” who proclaims she does not need relationships…yikes!
    2. Kim D’s fashion show is basically Call Girl Couture.
    3. Dolores apologizing to Jesus for swearing in church was my favorite line of the night.

  16. Wonky Tonk

    Where to start really. Juicy Joe was a hottie back in the day I didn’t expect that. Tre, that criminal trying to soften her image by going to church made me laugh for the sheer preposterousnous (is that a word, screw it I’m using it anyway) of the thing. I just can’t with her constant refusals to accept responsibility for her criminal activity. I can’t believe people are actually supporting this woman financially through her books. Hell I’m surprised she hasn’t started her own Italian cooking utensils line. She probably will eventually.

    WTH is wrong with Siggy? Jeebus but she runs on and on and on and on. Although I will say her instinct to just confront her issues directly with the person the issue arises is exactly the best way to handle issues with people. The only thing is I can’t really tell if she did with Jac, and Melissa because she thought it was the best bet for their ongoing relationships, or if she needed something to film for the show. Probably some of both I’m guessing.

    Delores seems kind of even keeled for the most part. I was in the kitchen when I heard her tell Chris he shouldn’t go to the event, and that he should take the position he’s always going to backup his wife. Which is great I suppose, and I think in general that’s the way it should be, but damn with a wife like Jacqueline the man is likely to never have a social life outside his immediate family. Jacqueline is seriously a little cray cray I’m thinking.

    • Deirdre

      My favourite part (aside from everything Delores) was watching Chris’ face turn from tan to white to red to gray and back to red when Delores was telling him what to do.

    • I think Delores had no business telling Chris not to go. Joe Guidice is a criminal but he is a friend, a good friend of Chris. Juicy is going to the linker for 3 1/2 years and probably going to be deported. It will most likely be the last time Chris and Joe will ever see each other again.

  17. Lois

    My daughter was one of the bartendersat Jacqueline and Chris popcorn launch party. Noone at that party tipped!!!

    • Kiyoshigirl

      I’m sorry to hear that, but at any private function I’ve held with an open bar, gratuity for wait and bar staff was my responsibility. Too bad that wasn’t stipulated in their contract, because it is quite standard.

      • tamaratattles

        I agree, if I am at a function where there is an open bar, I don’t come prepared to tip. Catering staff, both waitstaff and bar staff should be covered in the price of admission or by the person paying for the event. I’ve never seen anyone leave a tip on the table at a catered event.

      • Suzanne

        I agree with you and Tamara regarding the tips. I had a catered event at my house which included an open bar and the bill included the gratuity for the wait staff. It was all explained to me upfront when I was booking the event that a fixed percentage would be added on to the bill for the gratuity for the waitstaff and bartender. This way, the staff is fairly compensated.

    • The parties I have been to with an open bar. There is always a cup or something for tips for the bartender. I have to try and remember to change because I rarely have cash on me.

  18. Mitzi

    Lawd yes on those Gucci guilty commercial. Sick of it. And in spite of it all, I’m still team Teresa. Jacqueline is an crap starter. And dang that Siggy gets on my last nerve. Constantly running her mouth flailing around all the time. She has to be the loudest and center of attention at everything. Hope she’s gone next season.

  19. Curlygirl

    I was actually impressed with how Melissa handled herself with Siggy, calling her out for going to Jacqueline’s event but not hers. Siggy seems like an idiot just trying to insert herself in conflict for airtime. Why the hell is she constantly crying about these people fighting over things that don’t involve her? Jacqueline’s manipulating Dolores and Siggy by pulling back until they come over to give the poor victim her attention. I’d pick Melissa and Teresa the C word over having to pander to Jac, an unintelligent narcissist who is bound to turn on Siggy any minute now. That’s not a friendship – constantly having to cater to someone’s passive aggression and “poor me” narrative. These newbies (more Siggy than Dolores) are codependent sycophants and I fast forward through their handwringing scenes.

    • Wonky Tonk

      Yeah Tre really did not look happy when Siggraph and Delores shut her down when she started trashing Jac. That look she gave them is the precursor to an eventual Tre meltdown. Maybe she really had changed and she’ll control herself now. It was interesting the ladies mentioned she can’t be around drama that might have the police called in due to her probation so that may be a mitigating circumstance for her continued good behavior.

  20. Wonky Tonk

    I may have to rewatch this episode as reading our comment and a few others makes it clear I wasn’t paying close enough attention. I was in the kitchen so I heard but didn’t see the reaction you describe from Chris, and I kind of want to see it ….just because.

  21. Margaret Shepard

    This show has jumped the shark. I Dr it and skip through all of Siggy, but other than Dolores , it’s just the same old shit. Teresa , so tired of her sickening crap of poor, pitiful innocent me, Jac is whack. Just can’t anymore, cancel this tired old show or completely recast it.

  22. Margaret Shepard

    Mean’t to say , tape it.

  23. PeachyKeen

    Waiting for my clothes dryer to buzz…which sums up my interest in RHONJ.. This show will not last
    long enough to see Joe being deported. The only surprise I anticipate is whether I end up with pairs of socks once my clothes are done. This show is a waste of airtime.

    • Jrleaguer

      @PeachyKeen, I too folded clothes while it was on. I was folding laundry back during season one when Caroline uttered the famous, “My family, we are as thick as thieves” line…only, since I was folding laundry I heard, “As sick as Steve.” I was left wondering, who is this poor schmuck, Steve and why is he so sick?

      • PeachyKeen

        Jr… clever.. my hearing is fading also. Upon reflection, I have noticed “The thick as thieves” line keeps popping up in her comments thru the years… I think all have unpaid tax issues and considering Tre and Juicy. jail time perhaps a new analogy would be better?

  24. I opted to watch the drama-infused carnival of belched self-defence, serial eye-rolling, petulant sulking, and mutually hurled accusations of criminal behavior. So yeah, I missed HW because of the debate.

  25. Shay 2.0

    Thanks for pointing out the disappearing electronic from under the cabinet TT! I’m curious why they had to reshoot that scene. I also watched the commercial closely and the guy’s tattoo switched from his left shoulder to his right! Creepy weird commercial all together.
    I found it interesting that Siggy said to Melissa something about the fabulous 5 was no longer fabulous or 5. Between her and Delores, I feel like they never wanted Robin to be a housewife. Why else would she say that?
    It seems like I have watched Chris Laurita more this year than ever. Is it to babysit Jacqueline so she doesn’t appear as crazy or to collect as many pay checks as he can. I think the latter of the two so of course he will go to Joe’s party to insure filming in yet another episode.
    To weigh in on Melissa not answering Jacqueline’s question in Vermont, Personally I would not answer any question that was being aggressively asked of me. Secondly, I have 4 sister-in-laws, it is a different relationship than with my actual sister. if I was moving forward with one of them after going through a bad patch I would not allow anyone to bring it up again in the future. She had no obligation to answer her and there was No reason to rip that bandaid off and open that wound again. I actually like Teresa and Melissa’s relationship this year. Jac wants conflict at every turn. She is the reason we are seeing Kim D again. Jac loves talking about soldiers, Possibly Kim D is one of her soldiers? Kim will trash talk about anyone and Jacqueline know this. Melissa brought up some very valid points with Siggy at their lunch. Jacqueline is all over the place and is hurt because Melissa didn’t answer the question? Jacqueline’s behavior is a twist on Danielle Staub’s tagline, Jac’s should be, “either I love you or hate you but there is no in between.”

    • Babysitting is exactly what Chris is doing, he is always trying to get ahead of any damage control. Jacqueline is the one making her relationships difficult. She is shallow. I think she asked about Siggy’s period intentionally, that was a “you are old” dig.

  26. CupcakeScholar

    The Posche fashion show was EVERYTHING! Those ensembles were very entertaining. The best part is that it looks like it is being held in a restaurant. I love eating while being entertained. I would definitely attend if given the opportunity.

  27. Kiyoshigirl

    That Siggy is a mess. Her car battery was dead so she needed a rental? She’s a supposed relationship expert, but falls apart for days after just sitting next to someone else’s confrontation? Something ain’t right in Siggyland.

  28. Madashell

    It’s clear Jacqueline was mad that Melissa stood by Teresa. If she (Jacqueline) truly liked Teresa they could all be a happy group right now , but instead it’s 2 against 3. Kim D was so shady tonight and her clothes were so tacky as was her eye makeup! Hilarious. Glad Melissa has Teresa’s back because she is smart and can out do any of these women in a verbal fight. Lastly, I thought Dolores looked really nice in her kitchen scene.

  29. Amy

    I still don’t know which one is Siggy (is that short for something) and which one is Delores…

  30. Margaret Shepard

    Siggy is the one who cries throughout every episode over damn near anything.

  31. BeetsWhy

    This was the most boring episode I’ve ever watched of any of the franchises. Dolores and Siggy seemed like an aside and contributed nothing. bravo needs to call it what is, The Teresa Show, and be done with these attempts to add new people.

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