Real Housewives of Melbourne: Desert Storm

RHOMel Dubai 2


It’s time to head back to Dubai where both Pettifleur and Lydia have been behaving badly. We’re back at the lovely dinner where the ladies are ignoring all the fantastic things around them to bully Pettifleur.  Pettifleur’s crimes are mostly limited to her self-centered needy behavior and her lack of interest in or empathy for any of the other women. She no fun to be around. However, everyone going at her like a pack of wolves is not going to help anything.  A better solution would have been one of the women taking Petti aside and speaking to her privately. But it’s much better TV for everyone to gang up on the weakest member and annihilate  her so sadly, that is what is going on.

I finally have something in  common with Gina! We both use the word ‘actually’ way too much. Gina’s “nice” approach and comes across and condescending. Finally, Gina has enough of Petti’s poor pitiful me attitude and screams at her to snap the fuck out of it. Petti thinks she is just perfect the way she is and doesn’t listen to a word anyone says. Gina tries to list of some of Petti’s good qualities.  I bet she listened to that part.

Thank God for Gamble who has written a song for some group that Susie is in charge of the Country Women’s Association. No description of this could possibly do it justice. It was simply priceless.

Chyka finally gets to spend some time with Bruce and her son BJ who she hasn’t seen in 6 months. He’s been on his gap year in the US and Europe. BJ seems like the golden child of the family.

Sidenote: I just discovered that this episode is only an hour-long instead of the usual 15 minutes. There was some cut off of the front, so I assume the dinner argument was a bit longer. I’m okay with missing all that yelling.

RHOMel Dubai


Oooooooh they are in the gold souk now, and I am in my happy place. I’d love to go to a gold souk again.  Wait it looks like some are at the souk while others are at the tourist mall. There is no comparison. I guess rich people just like overpaying for stuff. It’s also idiotic to get dressed up and look wealthy in the souk, they can spot these women from miles away.  That sound they hear is the prices being raised. Chyka, Janet and Gamble are at the souk. Gamble probably should have gone with Gina, Susie  and Jackie.  Petti is nowhere to be seen. Nor is my girl Lydia.

We’re going to need the Aussies to tell us what “woggy” means.

While the ladies all complain about Pettifleur rather than enjoy their time away from her, Lydia searches the beach for Pettifleur. She starts off being very kind to her and checking on her; however,  Petti immediately snaps at her be quiet and let her speak. Lydia wants to talk about no one wanted to talk about her blog or how she has been going to Dubai since the 1920’s.  Is arrogantcy a word in Australia? Petti and Lydia get in a fight about the other being arrogant. I’d have to say they both sort of tie in that department; however, Lydia does occasionally listen to what other people are talking about. You know, before she brings it back to herself.  Petti screams at Lydia to get the fuck away from her.  Petti is screaming at her and saying she should have given her a hug.  Hug is the Aussie casserole this episode. Somehow they end on a happy note.

Chyka is planning a wedding in Dubai. Finally, we get to see some to the setup. The flowers are absolutely stunning!  It’s a traditional Muslim wedding where the women and the men are kept completely separate. I went to one of these as a child, not a fancy one like this but a middle class one. It was very interesting.  This is one of the most extravagant weddings in the world. I am mesmerized by this scene.

RHOMEL Cast season 3
What is this? The ladies are going to the cultural center to learn about Arab culture? This would never happen on an American show. I am enthralled with this episode, I am so glad I waited until the weekend when I am in no rush and can enjoy all these amazing moments. I love this guy and how he explains the culture.  I love his explanation of the reason they pray five times a day, it’s to check in with their behavior and to make sure they have not hurt anyone or behaved contrary to the religious teachings. If they have they pray for forgiveness if they have not they say a prayer of thanks.

Back to dinner at one of the tourist restaurants. Gamble explains the reasoning behind the multiple prayers per day. Petti is excited by this revelation because she is expecting apologies. Very quickly, Janet escalates and tells Petti she wants nothing to do with her. She tells her to leave because no one wants her here. Petti gives Janet an apology and a hug.  Petti also hugged Gina and Gamble was hurt that Gina is now friends with Petti when she hasn’t been a very good friend to her lately.  Gamble cries and Chyka comforts her while Gina tells her to get herself together and don’t start feeling sorry for herself.

Next, Jackie comes for Lydia.  Janet says that Lydia is saying bad things about everyone and their families. Jackie sure is on a high horse. Jackie says that she can’t be friends with Lydia because she ruins families. Lydia points out that Jackie is a gossip and Jackie freaks out and can’t take what she is dishing out. In confessional, everyone has a story about something bad Lydia has said about them. The only thing that gives these attacks any credence is that Chyka says it’s true.  In fact Chyka leaves the dinner and says off camera about Lydia, “I hate her.” Oh Lydia, what have you done now? I hope it’s not the rumors about Bruce.  Jackie follows Chyka and calls Lydia  a fucking cunt off camera.

Next Week: The pack of ladies attack Lydia.   Not my Lydia, dammit!

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Filed under Entertainment News, Real Housewives of Melbourne

39 responses to “Real Housewives of Melbourne: Desert Storm

  1. SLM

    Chyka is my favorite. I really hope she’s coming back next season. This is also my favorite RH franchise right now. It’s so much more interesting than the others. I liked the souk scenes too, TT.

  2. Tartkarma

    Rumors about Bruce? TT spill the tea!

  3. Jack

    Such a good Melb ep! I loved the cultural centre scenes with Jackie and the food.

    Wog is slang for European migrants/ European background, esp Italians, Greeks, Maltese. Was a derogatory term back in the 1960s/70s, but has changed a lot, hence Jackie’s use of it to describe herself and Gina.

    If you describe something as woggy, it’s kind of saying over the top, gaudy, blingy. Basically Gina Liano haha

    • Barbara

      This show reminds me why I started watching the HW. It is the only one left worth watching. I can’t watch any of the other ones, too demeaning. Tried NY but Frankel was too predominant, so gave up fast this season. I think if this show lost Lydia and Petit, no one would care much.

      • TR

        Real housewives of Auckland is good too.

      • Wonky Tonk

        Oh yes, please usher Lydia, and Petti out.

        Lydia is the most viciously passive aggressive housewife I’ve ever seen. You can see her onscreen obviously attempting to manipulate the other women when she gets them alone. She drops comments and suggestions to these ladies individually in a way that’s designed to illicit negative reactions to her targets. The way she treated her maid was disgusting. I just wrote something about her dog and then deleted it because I just realized that may not have aired yet in the US.

        I’m disgusted by the way she attempts to use her physical size to try to intimidate the other ladies when she gets into arguments with them.

        And Petti is so freakin full of herself it isn’t fun to watch anything she does this season, or last, or the original come to think on it. Seriously it shows with her personal relationships. I’ll stop there since I can’t remember what’s revealed in each separate episode. I’ve seen them all and the reunion and don’t want to spoil anything for anyone. I have to admit I do watch how she’s treated some times and wonder if there’s an element of racism in there even if the one’s practicing it are unaware that’s what it is, but to be blunt Petti’s constant need for attention makes it extremely hard to feel any sympathy for her.

        I do like the new housewife Susie, and not just because she has Lydia pegged for the useless giant sack of nasty mess she is either. I think she’s well grounded, and it’s fun to watch her relationship with her sons.

    • Navymommy

      I lived in England for most of the sixties and it refers to a doll called a Golliwog. It was an African doll black with big eyes, big lips, hoop earrings, a horn necklace, a grass skirt and ankle decorations/ barefoot. That is the most I can remember. Black people were called Wogs. It is a very derogatory term, almost equal to the N word. I remember my mother being horrified by it and forbidding it being used by her children.

  4. Diane

    I think woggy is an offensive term. Describes immigrants. Non whites. I has this chat with a co worker who moved to Australia few years back. He said he would be considered a ‘wog’ because he was African American and Dominican. Not sure where the word comes from.

    I agree TT about the visit to the center to learn about Arabic culture. The man was so entertaining and good looking :-) where can I get a burkini? LOL

    The praying 5 times a day really moved me and I have actually been trying to do my own reflection a bit more because I think it is a wonderful view.

    They went overboard with Pettifleur. Mean. I truly think she behaves in that way out of hurt and it is her wall of protection. I am one of the few I guess that get her.

    Gamble is my favorite and she is just great! She cracks me up.

    Lydia….what to do with Lydia. Has anyone noticed how much heavier she is this year? She also looks different to me….is she well? Wondering. Hope she hasn’t done anything too bad.

    Love Chyka! I have heard she is not returning? I hope to the Gods and Goddesses that there is nothing going on with Bruce?

    Love this group!

  5. Twilly

    I know it’s mean, but I’m no fan of hers anyway, but I just don’t like Jackie’s.face.

  6. Katherine 2.0

    Chyka unloaded on Lydia. It was magnificent.
    Each one of these women entertains me for different reasons. I love all of them.
    Gina responding to Gamble put me in mind of a man berating a woman for being too sensitive. I didn’t see it as callous when Gina said she was angry that Gamble was sad. She still needs to own up to the reason she left early the evening before her wedding.
    Pettifleur is a planet unto herself.
    I would watch a show featuring Chyka’s business. That was a highlight.

    • Wonky Tonk

      Yes on the Chyka show please. Let’s hope that happens. I would think I would love watching her setting up weddings in exotic locals, and do extravagant events in general. I would think that would be a pretty easy sell for a show.

  7. Tamara, thank you, thank you, thank you for the recaps of RHOM! Love this show. Chyka is fascinating and a really nice person – sad if she doesn’t come back next year. Pettifleur is beyond unbelievable – when did she get this needy and narcissistic? I admit I don’t keep up with all the details of the show but I hadn’t realized she was divorced. Maybe that’s why she’s so desperate for attention and proof that she’s still attractive. She’s a beautiful woman and it’s a pity she ruins it with her over-the-top behavior. Gina was fantastic – I can see why she’s a barrister – she was like a machine gun rat-a-tatting out all the fine points of why Pettifleur was impossible to be around. Janet was in great form too – her ‘shut the fuck up and get out of here’ was priceless. Jackie I’m not sure of – but her expressions of righteous indignation are worth the price (or not) of tuning in ! It’s funny, as outspoken as these ladies can be in their conversations, I always get the feeling they (mostly) really care about each other. One thing I am getting a little tired of, although I love her, is the constant boo-boo face on Gamble, complete with her lower lip sticking out. Still, in general, I really like her and am so happy she and Rick got married. Hope this show keeps going for years – it’s the best of the bunch.

    • Alex Quimby

      Pettifleur is a true blue narcissist. Narcissists look more normal and not as self-absorbed when you first meet them which is why some viewers may be wondering whether she changed. I do not believe she’s changed. She is just not hiding her true narcissistic personality any longer. Sadly I have experienced first hand the damage a narcissist doles out. I think that the ladies are correct to get away and distance themselves. They look like mean girls but the real mean girl is Pettifleur. She is always putting people down, doling out backhanded compliments, and passive aggressive digs. These people are exhausting (as Janet aptly described) and will destroy you if you do not get away. Go back to the earlier episode with her sister. She knew nothing about her sister. Very typical of a person w/narcissistic personality disorder. I think Lydia is also incredibly self-absorbed. I am not a fan of hers at all.

  8. hahahahaha Oh Lydia’s “arrogancy” is only outdone by her uh, er, oh wait, is arrogancy a word? 😉

    So totally kidding! I swear my vocabulary gets snapped each time I watch Lydia on this show. She’s butchering yet another word this week.

    But I do love this show. It’s the glitz and glam and the REAL type of drama – you know, the nitpicking of personality conflict.

    Kind of what I thought we’d have in RHONY or RHOBH. But no – those 2 shows prefer to investigate the hell out of each other and one up each other for drama.

  9. Lisafromoz

    Ok woggy means anything that Greek, Italians and those that love golden fleck wall paper and replica statues/ water fountains in a small 1/4 acre block. My roots are Greek/ Aboriginal/ English and yes we had them all. Mum loved the chandaleir look in a small space. I kind of think it’s universal to many cultures. We had a silver hued fabric lounge, gold hued carpet – think my big fat Greek wedding! Xxx

  10. Lisafromoz

    And yes wog was a very derogative term especially in the 70’s 80’s but we embraced it – can’t hurt if you use it yourself hey !

  11. Jrleaguer

    My husband walked into the room while I was watching and said, “Oh, are they doing a drag version of Real Housewives?”

  12. gluedtothepc

    I enjoy that all of these women bring something interesting to the table with their personalities/personas. I’m like others here in that this HW franchise is my favorite (& I still watch all but RHOA). Pettifleur is the most annoying and my least favorite of these housewives, but I like all the others for different reasons. I’m with Janet in her attitude about Pettifleur – she would be exhausting and irritating to hang around. I’m interested to see how things play out next week, after the Jackie bombs about Lydia’s gossiping got dropped this week!

  13. Redhibiscus

    TT, you have lived a very interesting life. Living in other countries has given you an insight into others cultures that we don’t have. You can read about, watch documentaries on it, but there is no comparison to living it. Lucky you.

  14. AmyinLasVegas

    If you think learning about the culture is interesting you may want to read the “Princess” books by Jean Sasson if you haven’t already. I am on book four of five and I sped thru the first three books they were so interesting! I think I learned a lot about the Muslim religion vs the Muslim culture.

    • @AmyinLasVegas ~ You are correct. I had a college suite mate who was a Jordanian Princess, so when I saw the first book, I read it non stop. I read Princess back in the early 90s and Princess Sultana’s Daughters and Princess Sultanas Circle in 2000. These books made up the original Princess Trilogy. I always recommend them as reading to those trying to get a feel for life for women in the Middle East. Granted, it focuses mainly on those in royal circles and only gives a slight glimpse into the lives of those women who are not in the royal family. Both sides have it very bad, but those that are not royal have it a lot worse.

  15. Coco

    IMO this is the best real housewives franchise of the whole lot! Jackie at the cultural discussion was just hilarious — thinking about the food and not listening to anything that beautiful
    man was speaking about to the ladies. That would have been me.

    Checking in with your behavior five times a day would do everyone a world of good. I should try it!

    Everyone going in hard on Pettifluer was a little harsh. The women should be more compassionate to her, but at least they spoke their minds and Pettifluer knows where she stands with them.

    Great recap!!

  16. Guest Appearance

    I’m for a wedding planning spinoff for Chyka. No arguing allowed.

  17. tamaratattles

    To the person who continues to try and post spoilers for the US viewers this season. Your posts are not published because OF SPOILERS regarding the future relationships of the housewives and how their actions may or may not impact THE NEXT SEASON!

    Not because of your constant Lydia bashing.

    So just STOP!

  18. Brianna

    Jackie is down right hard to watch now and her racial remarks about petti behind her back are disgusting (putting a turban on and saying “oh I’m petti now” while mocking her accent). I take what petti says w a grain of salt so I don’t see her as annoying as the others do. She’s very dry and playful and Lydia and petti get along bc they are the same way. Susie is pathetic.. Lol her first episode she was spreading rumors to the others about Lydia .. Chyka didn’t seem to mind that. Chyka seems so bothered by these “rumors” if it’s not true then why are you so distraught over it. I doubt Lydia made the rumors up she probably heard them then repeated it just like alllllll of the girls have done on the show about each other.

  19. tamaratattles

    Sorry Gang, I was super busy since the blog posted and forgot the need to babysit these posts because so many know it all assholes want to jump in and spoil the season and discuss the plans for next season.

    I’ve taken out the trash.

  20. Okay. These Melbourne wives are so gorgeous, rich, over the top dramatic and fun to watch. I absolutely love them all and find myself rewinding, rewatching and laughing out loud at their antics. Best. Show. On. Bravo.

  21. Kate Gates

    I am loving all the comments (I’m Aussie and it’s like re watching the whole season) Thanks TT!! PS I may have missed it, or it hasn’t played in America yet, but please, PLEASE recap Real Housewives of New Zealand. It’s the most amazing of them all!! Xx

    • tamaratattles

      Actually, Someone is recapping AUCKLAND as it airs for TT. However, I am saVing them in a file and not peeking because we haven’t gotten it yet. We may not ever! So I am not sure when they will be posted!

  22. Kate Gates

    You’re a brilliant poster, TT. All I can say is that New Zealand tops OZ in ways I didn’t think possible. Three episodes in and it’s my favourite housewives of all time. (weigh that on the traditional OZ – NZ rivalry – this is an Australian saying NZ is doing something better!) also, quite sad that I’m not related to Lydia. She’s my favourite fictional Aunty that refers to me as her younger sister.

  23. Kate Gates

    Sorry! I said poster when I meant blogger. Thank you anyway!

  24. Jackie

    Lydia is my favorite also. I hope she does not go off the rails with everyone.

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