The Only Good Thing About Bachelor In Paradise This Week Is Ashley Iaconetti

 

BIP Ashley and Wells

And Wells Adams.

Who cares about the played out Nick and Josh drama? Ashley I is the new Chad! And I love it!

When Wells Adams arrives it is as if the heavens have parted and delivered Wells directly to Ashley I. Wells is cute young thing from Nashville, Tennessee. He was on JoJo’s season of The Bachelorette, but JoJo has incredibly bad taste in men and chose some douchebag instead.  Wells love dogs as evidenced by his constant dog photos on his instagram, and tacos, both of which figured prominently on his date with Ashley. Never one to get intimate too fast, Wells was the only guy not to kiss Jo Jo on The Bachelorette.  Wells and Ashley had a charming date going out for tacos at an outdoor cafe. They encountered a stray dog (imaging that, a dog with no rabies cleared for filming just wander to the table) which they both bed and petted and cooed over. A great time was had by all. Wells even made out with Ashley for his first on screen kiss!

However, the end of last night’s show, morning broke and Wells was the first and only one up when Jami (who?) showed up with a date card.  She asked. He said yes and off they went on some day long adventure while Ashley and the rest of the crowd slept in.

BIP Ashley  cry

Ashley took the news very well, but she was a bit bored without Wells, so she used her time to get that bitch Kaila out of her Paradise. After a brief talk, Caila was ready to leave Paradise forever. Excellent work, Ashley.  I can’t wait to see what you do to Jami.  Did I mention the twins left too? For some reason that sent three guys home when I thought only one was going. The twins must have finally been uncoupled to play as two separate humans, only to leave together without finding love, and sending three guys home two that I have no idea who they were, and comic relief, Canookian Daniel.

Tonight, Jami and Wells return from their date and another young woman, Shushanna arrives with a date card. Apparently, Wells is the new Jared because she asks Wells as well! It’s almost like this is all planned out by production!

So Jared left with Caila, which is AWESOME. I am sick to death of Jared. That explains why when Shushanna gets here she picks Wells again too.  She even maintains her cool when Wes comes back with Jami raving about how much fun their all day date on dune buggies or whatever was.

I forgot to mention that Izzy dumped Vinny the other day for some Brett guy who showed up last week? Poor Vinny always gets put in the friend zone. Who will he give his rose to? Oh wait, a blond named Lauren wanders in and Brett is salivating. This would be awesome karma for Izzy.

Shushanna, soon to be dubbed the Russian hooker by our girl Ashley, arrives and she has a double date card with Lauren. So Wells and the Russian Euro Trash and Lauren and Brett head off on a date.

I’m enjoying the Mexican scenery thinking of how pretty it looks and then remember that El Chapo’s son was just kidnapped from that area.  Then the jeep comes to a stop to let the foursome out and there is a place in the background that has yellow crime scene tape wrapped around it.  Oddly it is only there in one of the shots of them getting out, but not when they pull up. I’m now obsessed with spotting La Leche on one of these dates.

The gang gets surf lessons and all head out to try their luck at catching some waves. Brett’s date Lauren is the most annoying person in the world. Her facial expressions and her voice make me want to put on a blindfold and some earplugs.

Somehow the erectile dysfunction specialist landed his woman. He has not problems getting erections as seen by the large black box hiding his groin region.

Dumbass Amanda after being told by EVERYONE what a huge, worthless, douche Josh is, is yammering to the cameras about wanting to get engaged to him. I wonder which was filmed first, this show or Famously Single? Because he was a douche on that show too.

Next Week is already the finale episodes! A sad and grim reminder that summer is ending. And once again the time that Ashley gets her heartbroken. But there will be a record number of proposals!

12 Comments

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12 responses to “The Only Good Thing About Bachelor In Paradise This Week Is Ashley Iaconetti

  1. New kid

    I like Ashley I, as well, for her entertainment value. She really tortured Caila & Jared. My fave was a couple of weeks ago, when they Skyped with Ashley’s dad, and he opened with an ugly crying scene. She definitely does the ugly cry.

    I love that you mentioned Izzy & karma. I was thinking the same thing when her new guy went on a date with some new girl. The way she treated Vinny last week was really cold after spending all that time as a couple.

    I love your recaps. I really appreciate your sense of humor & sarcasm!

    • tamaratattles

      Thanks. This show is a god send to me with all the vitriol surrounding the housewives lately. It’s a goofy campy scripted silly bit of summer fluff and everyone is in on the joke including the cast.

      And somehow, miraculously, when everyone isn’t taking anything seriously, more relationships come out of this show than The Bachelor and the The Bachelorette combined.

  2. Zoemonster2

    What do you think of the new bachelor, TT???!?!!!

    Famously Single was filmed first. I think?? thatz why Josh was late arriving in Mexico. FS had just wrapped filming.

    • tamaratattles

      I think Nick has done a lot to redeem himself on BIP. He has managed to sort of rehab his image a bit. He is a controversial choice, and he is definitely a media whore, but they all are. At least he is transparent about it.

      I’ll definitely be watching (but not blogging because the season is always spoiled before it even airs and I literally live in fear of being spoiled all season.)

  3. Vic

    Why???? Did they announce the new bachelor before bachelor in paradise ended??? I love him but way to ruin it.

  4. Kymbur

    After watching after paradise last night I feel really sorry for Calia. When I first seen Ashley I thought she was soo beautiful, but her personality makes her not. I think Jarid likes all the attention he gets from Ashley. I’m sure Calia gave him an ultimatum about Ashley and he choosed Ashley. I seen the coming from day one. Calia was just hoping he would put her first and it never happened.

  5. Judith wagman

    I love Ashley I. I think she’s beautiful and has a good heart. Give her a break. So she Cry’s. I hope she finds some one. Wish it could be Jared. They make a very good looking couple. Ashley should be the next bachelorette.

    • Ashley may be beautiful, but she’s as unstable as they come. Once the show is over, she’ll go right back to obsessing over that wet blanket Jared. His balls are about as big as those of a two-year-old girl, and Caila is no better. Still, Caila could probably see a future with crazy stalker Ashley dogging them constantly and using her so-called friendship with Jared as an excuse to contact him 24./7 – not something any sane woman would want, so I think she became less invested in Jared than she was in the beginning. Unless Jared gets more backbone, he’ll have Ashley sabotaging all his relationships. He needs to tell her it’s better if they cut off all contact because it will be healthier for both of them. Love this show, even if it is becoming really staged – the way people keep turning up to mess up relationships is a bit suspicious. Looking forward to next year already.

      • mddc

        He obviously likes being her friend. I heard he went on vacation with her family this summer. As far as Ashley, she was on Millionaire Matchmaker. I saw a commercial for it and caught a glimpse of Ashley. I’d been watching the summaries and finally along came the week Ashley was listed. She went on two dates; both went well. The guy she chose ended up coming to the door (a new segment in the show), and they walked off into the sunset together and lived happily ever after. HA! Of course he’ll have to put up with her friendship with Jared. lol

  6. I don’t watch Bachelor or Bachelorette but I love this show! And Ashley I is the best! She’s volatile, scheming, manipulative and the crying, the crying! There aren’t enough exclamation points for how awesome she is. Best tv villain in a long time.

    • mddc

      I love Ashley I too! I love your description of her. With it, she can be the first virgin real housewife. Nah, she’s too good (and young) for RHs.

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