It’s time for another episode of RHOOC and my new laptop just finished updating to all sorts of things I have no idea how to use. So this may take a bit longer than usual. Like now, I am trying to do a search in my search box and all I get is a blue circle. Sigh. This laptop was too expensive not to be the fastest thing on the planet. It’s possible things are still updating in the background.
Forgive me for sticking to the big issues tonight, and I appreciate y’all filling in all of the stuff I don’t spell out here that was of interest to you. Heather is pissed that Terry has to be out of town on Mother’s Day. She is actually pissed that he is working so much he basically never sees the kids. Which is bullshit. She knew what she was getting into when she married a plastic surgeon in Orange County. The work apparently never ends.
Jim could not be any more disinterested in Meghan’s IVF.
Let’s just skip to the good stuff. I just looked up and is Kelly wearing a wig for the party or extensions for daily wear? I have no idea. Shannon seems a bit confused about what is the 70s. I was in elementary school in the 70s, but my big brother was a hippy living most of the time in Switzerland in boarding school. I was in Libya which was more like the 40s or 50s at the time. So I am no expert either. I do remember my parents bitching about my brother’s field trip being flying to London to see Hair.
Shannon, in some sort of bitch move invited this Jackie person who is apparently Kelly’s mortal enemy. She points out she knows Kelly and the guy she used to date when she was separated from Michael. I must say that Kelly brought it up first. So there is that. I guess I will keep an open mind about Jackie, but it is clear to me at least that Shannon invited her to needle Kelly.
I love that Vicki and Kelly called Shannon out for providing cheap tequila. I also love Heather’s “fuck it” I can deal with Vicki and let God sort it out attitude.
This may be the most pathetic party in housewives history.
I admire Tamra for her dedication to her fitness regime. And her willingness to forgive Vicki. Why did Meghan bring her mother to this particular fiasco? Couldn’t she just film with her at home? Although I must say her mother seems to fit right in the shit show.
Everyone seems legit drunk except for perhaps, Tamra. Kelly says that David looks like a pedophile and we are off to the races!
Meanwhile Heather thinks this is a great time to talk to Terry about his busy schedule. Terry seems very remorseful about missing time with his kids. The both seem very rational despite Heather having had a lot of Champs.
Shannon really does look like Mrs. Roper. Jaci is telling Shannon all the dirt on Kelly. Who is the Nina bitch? Nina moved Vicki’s purse?
Kelly confronts the coven of bitches and tells Shannon she looks like Mrs. Roper and Shannon throws her out of her party. But not before, David goes in of Vicki for lying about Brooks cancer. Shannon dashes over to her husband to say that Michael and Kelly are calling her dumb. Seriously, I mean I’ve never been married, but I’ve had plenty of LTRs and I would never go grab my man to fight my battles over someone calling me dumb. If Michael was hostile, maybe …but calling me Mrs. Roper and dumb? What an idiot Shannon is. When I taught first grade I taught my kids this concept. A kid would come screaming to me that someone called them stupid. I’d ask them if the were stupid. They would look at me horrified that I said “the s word” and say no. I would say, “So they are wrong, Who cares?” It rarely took more than twice for this exchange to happen and the SIX YEAR OLD would look at the other person and roll their eyes. But Shannon has to call in her husband? David is berating Vicki, a woman, way more than Michael, who merely called Shannon Mrs. Roper, yet Shannon is over there wanting her man to confront Michael. REALLY?
Then Vicki and Kelly and Michael leave. Vicki is drunk and drunk dials Brooks. Oh, sweetie, we have all been there but bad drunken mistake. She wants Brooks to fix everything and deal with David. I so understand this moment, Vicki, but tomorrow you are going to regret this moment SO MUCH.
Even Tamra needs a drink at this point. She calls Shannon the hooker version of Mrs. Roper. Shannon and Tamra run out in nekkid unitards. Seriously?
Next Week: More Drama. And Brianna is doing 50K in renovations to her new house? On a nurse and a military guy budget?