Below Deck Mediterranean Recap: Exodus of the Assholes

Below Deck Med
Are you wondering why this is the third episode with the charter guests from hell? I can tell you. Ratings. Sadly, people behaving like douche bags draw a big audience. I’ve had more people Googling about these guests than any other episode. I suppose the country is in such a bad place that people are looking for places to unleash their anger. Andy referred to this show as “Vanderpump Rules on a Boat” on WWHL recently.  Clearly, I am in the minority enjoying shows like Tour Group (that literally no one watched) and hoping this show would showcase the Greek Isles rather than dragging American idiots over to show their asses.  So let’s see what new stupidity lies ahead.

We are back to crying Ben. It’s hard being from a wealthy family apparently. Apparently, Ben is going to pout about this the entire trip. So Julia thinks she might have gone to far. Ben doesn’t want to talk to her about it. They eventually hug it out.

Then there is Danny and his cell phone obsession. I heard some idiots have fallen off cliffs and died playing Pokeman Go. I imagine them to be just like Danny, completely oblivious to the world around them. Danny is super exited to see Santorini though.

Below Deck 3

The asses are going to ride asses into town. I feel sorry for the four-legged ones. They return with another guest for dinner. And it is his birthday. Great.

I can’t believe that Hannah tried on a guest’s pants. That’s just so wrong.

Speaking of wrong, Danny has not followed his phone restrictions and is once again taking photos of and with the guests. Bryan caught him and took a photo of him taking a photo.  So Danny decides to run to the captain and confess before Bryan can rat him out.  I love that Captain Mark starts with, “What up?”  He lets Danny talk and dismisses him to deal with later. His focus is on getting these guests off the damn boat. They are supposed to leave at 4:30 a.m.

But for some reason the captain, Danny, Bryan Bobby and Ben are all together and Ben tells Danny to go get his phone and show it to them. Danny goes to his quarters followed by Bobby and Bryan and immediately removes the SIM card from his phone.  The captain goes to get the guys because the guests are finally leaving.  They count up the tip right away and it was 1,850 euros. Which is the biggest tip yet, but it was really twice the length of the other charters so it’s actually the worst tip.  So they complain about making two grand in five days in tips. That is on top of what they are already paid.

Below Deck Med Captain Mark

Before they can even go to bed,  Bobby and Bryan make unnecessary comments to Danny.  Danny responds by calling them a couple of butt buddies. Bobby rips off his shirt and demands a fight. The Captain hears and shows up in the crew kitchen where the action is going down.  Bobby goes apeshit and goes to the quarters he shares with Danny and rips out everything that is Danny’s and throws it out.  Danny tells the captain he took out his SIM card so he could prove he didn’t delete anything. Danny tries to show him the phone but it’s close to 5 am at this point and the captain just wants to get everyone in bed. SSo they let Danny sleep in the one of the guest rooms.  Bobby is ranting in his bunk and screams at Tiffany when she asks him to keep it down so he can get some sleep.

For some reason most of them are up at 8 am the next morning. Danny goes after Bryan again calling him a baboon’s ass and saying that Bobby is his butt buddy. Bobby got irate over the butt buddy comment last night. Like over the top crazy. Hmmm sensitive issue? or exhaustion? Bryan immediately goes crying to the captain. The captain unleashes on him. He tells him that he has been a problem since day one, he is a liability, and he doesn’t trust him. He has a ticket home and he needs to be off the boat within an hour.  And just like that Bryan drives Danny to shore and he hops on an ass and goes up the hill. So on the bright side, Danny got to see a lot of Santorini.

The crew has two days before the next charter. After some perfunctory deck swabbing the cast leaves the work to the Greek crew and has some whiskey. Wait. Isn’t the rule no drinking on the boat? Production brought a harmonica for Bobby to give Julia because she can apparently play. She doesn’t really see to know how to hold it. She grabs it like it’s a cheese sandwich. Suddenly, she hops up to go call her boyfriend. I guess Bobby on the guitar and her on the juice harp was a bit too intimate for her. Bobby continues to feel rejected by Julia because he just can’t get it through his head that she has a boyfriend. Ben and Tiffany continue to get closer.

The captain talks to Bryan and tells him he is off probation. He is officially the first mate. Yeah, um Captain Mark, I’m starting not to feel you so much anymore. As Jenn says, “Congratulations, Bryan, you are officially first douchebag.”

The gang takes the cable cars up to the city. I think I’d prefer the donkey although both options seem terrifying. As Hannah said, “We aren’t going down that way are we?”  Tifanny and Ben make out at the bar. Bobby picks up some random chick at the bar They take a cab back down the mountain, and Bobby brings the rando back to the tender. Seriously? Did he not remember the last time he did this? Bobby is also super drunk.  Reluctantly, he puts the girl back in a taxi and they all get in the tinder but not before Bobby calls all the girls jealous cunts and tells Julia that her boyfriend is a fucking pussy.

Next week: It’s the finale. Looks like the charters are old men. The women try to explain to Bryan what misogynistic piece of crap he is, but he refuses to listen. Julia has a talk with Bobby about disparaging her boyfriend on camera. Tiffany sleeps with Ben and the next night Hannah tries to sleep with him and professes her love. I don’t think she knows Tiffany and Ben did the deed. It looks like a great finale!

51 Comments

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51 responses to “Below Deck Mediterranean Recap: Exodus of the Assholes

  1. Sebass

    On any other job, Bobby’s performance in front of the captain would have been grounds for immediate termination!

    • Purple Lover

      The Captain had already let Danny by with so much that he couldn’t really fire Bobby after his outburst. I think he knew that they had been pushed to their limit and he was seeing Danny’s real behavior for the first time. Each other time, he had only heard about what had happened. We witnessed Danny trying to take the Simm card out of the phone.

  2. Michelle

    I agree that Danny should have been fired a while ago but honestly, Bobby should have been punished for his behavior. And that tip was an insult.

  3. G.

    I really enjoyed Tour Group and it had the potential to be an even better show. It’s disappointing there wasn’t more interest!

    • Vet

      I could never find it, they kept changing the days. I was so excited for the show and I only was able to watch three episodes.

  4. Diane

    It was actually Jules who put on the guest lace pants TT. Sorry.

    About time Danny left the boat. Geesh he lost a good gig. I don’t care what your job is there is a chain of command. Respect is everything.

    As to Ben crying. I get it. The class system is alive and well in Britain and I think Ben just didn’t like what it stood for and he fled. Many do. While he of course had a great advantage growing up that doesn’t mean he wanted to stay in that arena. It is very life sucking. The expectations of where you live, who can be friends, who you will marry etc etc is not for everyone. I think his choice to work on yachts says a whole lot about his distaste for the other life. I think maybe he has worked hard to build his own life and doesn’t want to be thought to be one of them. He cannot escape his past but Jules shouldn’t have put her own views (perhaps the middle class snobbery towards the toff crowd) onto him. She seemed to assume much about him. Ben is just matter of fact. Blunt. He is firm about his kitchen. But every season I have seen him in he has been kind to all and never seemeds snobbish. So for me his crying was sad….

    • PopcornAndVodka

      I agree about Ben. I’ve read a lot of books taking place in the UK, and while they are definitely fiction, there seems to be a running theme about the class differences between north and south, and being judged by your regional accent. I don’t believe Ben does mean to hurt anyone, but Jules’s life experience has taught her to be wary of “his type”. I’m glad it blew over, or at least seemed to, and I think 90% of it was just Jules’s exhaustion. I really like both of them.

    • Karen

      I think it was correcting Jules’ grammer that got to her as well as the discussion of her cleaning toilets for a living. Both were condescending although perhaps Ben didn’t see how she was taking his words to heart.

  5. Joanplus2dogs

    I am just so glad Danny is finally off the boat. His comments before & after his firing should be reason enough for him not to get another yachting job. Calling your superior names & trying to defend the fact Captain called his performance subpar would be mortifying to any normal person but not him!

    • I think being called subpar is what hit him the most. He figured they had one more charter left and he could do or say whatever he wanted without being fired. Not. I agree with Hannah, he should of been fired five charters ago. The rest of the crew had enough storylines going where he really didn’t make much of a difference. Bye, bye Daniel-san. An ass riding an an ass, such a fitting ending.

    • JoJoFLL

      Danny will not get another job in the yachting industry. They seem to blackball pretty bad from this show for bad behavior. Plenty who were assholes are no longer working in the industry.

      Kat from season 1 and 2 is the best example.

  6. Adam

    Bryan and Bobby are two of the biggest #$!%=s I have ever seen. I would love to run into one or both someday and simple knock them out! They are so close in personality it’s hard to comment on either without including both. Bryan has ZERO mangement skills and would have been fired weeks ago working at any corporate job. Bobby’s ego is beyond out if control. This guy thinks he’s the bomb when all he is is a spoiled frat boy.

  7. Adam

    Hghlight of the year! Jen saying “Congratulations Bobby, you are officially a douchbag!” Perfect timing Jen.

  8. Eric

    All the guys on that boat (exception Danny) are douche bags.

  9. BKSweetheart

    Oh man I was really trying to like Bobby. Sadly he’s just another douche-bro meathead. I did LOL when Danny called Bryan a baboon though! B does look like some kind of South Park character with that ridiculous chin..

    Speaking of the cable cars, I visited Taormina, Sicily years back and they had the same thing to get up to the town. And YES it was terrifying!! I couldn’t even look. But for some reason going down wasn’t as bad..

    • I visited Santorini in April & took the cable car down. It was quite pleasant & no swinging, unlike horizontal cable cars that are in open air, instead of close to the mountain that descend close to vertical.

  10. Perturbed

    Agree with everyone who said Danny should have been fired sooner. Apparently, he also lied about needing to send money home because his father doesn’t work. His mother offered for the whole family to come visit him in Greece, so they must have SOME disposable income. A couple of other crew members have also called him out on Twitter – what a little runt!

  11. pokerplayer

    Danny should have been fired sooner…he has no clue what 5 star service is…he doesn’t know his place with the guests…he’s not trust worthy…he tried to get that sim card out of his phone but wasn’t fast enough…he did shut Bryan up with those comments he made…I really don’t like Bryan or Bobby though.

    • Purple Lover

      I cannot stand any of the males on the boat with the exception of Ben. Ben is Ben! What more can I say. Danny should have been fired episodes ago. The cast does not get to see any footage before the shows are aired. I wonder what Captain Mark will have to say at the Reunion about all of Danny’s lies and breaking of rules and direct orders. Especially the footage of his making out with the client at the photo shoot on the beach. Danny crossed so many lines, and broke direct orders so many times I quit counting. As far as the other two on the deck crew, they are both pigs in the way they treated the women on the boat. They are both mean drunks and cannot hold their liquor. Bryan looked like a total jerk when he was drunk and should be reprimanded for the way he treated female staff. Bobbie obviously has no brain and cannot comprehend spoken language. Jules told him numerous times that she is not interested. She is a flirt, but she is that way with him and Ben. She has repeatedly told him that she is only interested in her boyfriend. Does he think he is so hot that he can get her to leave her boyfriend. What a total jerk! The boys on the boat obviously are just that, boys!

  12. Yea!!!! Danny finally got fired!! Damn, I wish I wasn”t diabetic – I’d have a nice fruity strawberry daquiri right about now to celebrate his finally getting his butt kicked off the ship. He doesn’t have a clue how inappropriate and inept he is. Then he says the crew didn’t help him “reach his full potential” and how being “subpar” was a good thing because it means there’s room for growth! Such a conceited, delusional piece of work. That good old English word “smarmy” fits him perfectly – ooozing with self-satisfaction and sincerity. The shot of the crew watching “an ass ride an ass” up the hill to Santorini was priceless. Soooooo glad to see him gone – he should have been out of there episodes ago. Next to go should be Bobby – he’s a bad employee in a different way than Danny, but also doesn’t know how to behave himself. The way he talks, especially when he’s had too much to drink, is something that should probably have been addressed by the Captain some time ago. Instead, he got promoted – his ability to do his job must outweigh his bad behavior.

    • Vince Walker

      Danny made the show worth watching. Yes, he crossed the lines, but Bobby is a meathead punk that made it seem like middle school. Who cares if Danny is socializing with the guests? I dont get it. I wish I would have had the chance to step out on the dock with him. He’s nothing but an ape. Kind of like Biff from Back to the Future. Love to see that gorilla hit the deck. Now that would be worth having a strawberry daiquiri for. And it was Bryan, not Bobby, that got promoted even though he was a douche.

  13. Skeeter

    I know that television puts on 20 lbs. to your appearance (well I’ve been told, I’ve never been on tv to see) but does it also add 20 lbs. of ugly too? I’m still trying to figure out what Hannah and Jules see in Bobby. IDGI!! Someone here said he looked like Gomer Pyle. HE DOES! The only thing beautiful about ole Gomer was his voice, that man could sing!

  14. talljohn777

    Danny is completely uncontrollable and clueless about crew staying in the background on a yacht.

  15. Amy V

    Over the weekend I binge watch Tour Guide and was impress. In fact the cast became Friends Of the View (FOV). If they weren’t being informative they became back ground noise. During the 90’s Prof. Gates of Harvard, found hundreds of scrolls in one of those red delapitated bldg. in North Africa. These scrolls contain part of Africa’s written history. Gates said it will take decades to interpret. I knew then I wanted to visit places like Morocco now I know it’s a must. Observing the silver back ape and meeting the Masai people of Kenya. How awesome is that. Galle, Sri Lanka was spectacular. Bangkok was exciting. Last but not least the Maldives. I mean how magnificent and sad at the same time because these islands are sinking and will soon disappear. TT, ever so often I hear you. Thanks!

  16. Here is my question to Captain Mark at the reunion: Now that you have seen Bryan’s way of dealing with the crew, do you still think he actually deserves that promotion?

  17. Just Saying

    Guess I’m the only one who liked Danny more than Brian and Bobby who I found obnoxious and immature for two people who claim they are adults. Sorry but Brian did not handle the situation as a supervisor should, all he did was run to the captain whining. The show will be boring without Danny and the guests loved him. Also both Brian and Bobby are not eye candy and bravo should have looked for better looking people to film, I find Brian reulsive to look at and Bobby should have seen a dentist before filming.

    Still love Ben and shame on Julia for making him feel bad about himself.

  18. Toddy

    Bobby should have been put on probation/written up for that vulgar tirade and tossing of the room. Out of control and unprofessional. But probably good tv for some. I don’t comprehend Ben’s tears but I’m still a fan of his patronizing ass. They can replace Jen, Bobby, and Brian. Jen is about as interesting as a box of rocks. Brian gave me the creeps in the episode where he was drunkenly supervising the girls. Bobby and that damn-damn fit🙄

  19. Kelly Bryant

    I have watched the entire season, and I agree that based on what is being presented on T.V., Danny should have been fired for not obeying the captain.

    I agree with others that Bryan is a horrible supervisor and manager, it is one thing to coach people and others to belittle them. The whole rope tying thing with Jen is just stupid. Also they seem to dock and move the boat without issues so I can’t see why he was having such an issue. His constant moaning and groaning about Jen and Daniel got old quickly, try to coach and help them instead of being a jerk. It is clear that Bryan has some anger issues when drinking and I found it horrible the way he spoke to Jules a few episodes ago about cleaning the kitchen, he is simply an arrogant jerk.

    Bobby, is a pretty boy trying to be Bryan buddy so they can team up on Daniel. I agree with others that with Bobby’s rants towards others should have gotten him fired too. At first I liked him but his hatred for Danny and trying to hard with Jules got old quickly. If this was a U.S. based series Bobby would have been fired long ago.

    Nice to see the interior team working well, Tiffany turned out to be super cool and I it was nice to see them all working together. Hannah quit smoking it will come back later in life and bit you.

    Ben is a great asset to the show his dialogue and how he stuck up for Danny, in most cases he brought a maturity to the crew that is sadly lacking from Bryan, Bobby and Hannah.

    Oh well good season can’t wait for the final show next week.

  20. Buttercream

    Not sorry to see Danny depart .. his behavior interacting with guests verbally admonishing his crew mates jeopardized not only their reputations for future employment, also for current income. He was lazy and was difficult to work with as a team member .. He should know his job without asking after the second charter .. not continued hand holding with negative results.
    Can’t wait to see who Ben is shagging & Bryan being told off by the female crew …

  21. punkinseed

    I haven’t watched it yet, but glad to know that Danny is fired finally. I really dislike most of the cast and the guests on this version. TT you’re right. The guests are schills for the show to boost interest/rating$.

  22. T D

    Poor Ben. Had he attended the school of hard knocks he wouldn’t have been so bored.. This poison ivy school of higher education furnishes no room and no board. Bootstraps and nutsacks have served many well.

  23. RosesandGin

    How is next week the last episode already?

    Im eating my words from last week about Bobby. Based on the preview I was happy he was standing up for himself with Julia constantly flirting with him, and then pushing him away. NOW this week he’s throwing Danny’s stuff, yelling at Tiffany- I found that very upsetting, and then calling the girls cunts. Unacceptable. What a disappointment.

    Im sad to hear that Danny wasn’t sending home to his mother. I found that to be his saving grace. Love me some Ben. Good for Tiffany. Nice try Hannah.

  24. Aerin

    Danny seemed quite confused about what his actual job was on the boat. I don’t see what was so hard to understand, but he was interpreting broadly and decided that he was a personal concierge. I think the crew was correct when they said yachting just wasn’t for him. And then there’s Bobby- his behavior has also been strange, but im concerned about how things might escalate for him if he doesn’t get help. Maybe yachting isn’t for him either, as he’s pretty aggressive in tight quarters. And how did that first mate get promoted?! The captain must be asleep up there.

  25. PopcornAndVodka

    I really don’t care about Danny, either way, hired or fired, at all.
    It’s stupid Bryan and Bobby that I never want to see on my TV again. I can barely bring myself to watch the show knowing I’m going to have to see and listen to those assholes.
    Bobby was on Twitter this week STILL being an ass, saying he was so sorry for calling Jules a cunt, but refusing to apologize for anything else, and he was super pissed at all viewers who were calling him out. Let’s see, there are multiple threats of physical violence, the harrassment of Jules who has told him NO repeatedly, disrespecting her boyfriend on-air, and again attempting to bring a woman on to the boat. Not to mention just overall acting like a 4 year old. He feels like he has every right to have behaved in all those ways.

    He blames Jules for flirting with him, and that’s why it won’t be his fault if he date rapes her, and it’s Danny’s fault that Bobby threatened violence because he called him a name and hurt his fee-fees. This is the kind of guy all women should avoid.

    I like Jenn but she’s no good for TV. I would never watch this version again unless they get rid of everyone but maybe Hannah, Jules and Ben. If Bobby or Bryan are back, I’m out.

    • Roxanne

      I agree with your last paragraph. Bobby and Bryan are hypocrites and bullies and have no respect for the females on that vessel. Notice how all the guys did their stupid fist bumps without Jen until Danny was fired. Then the two bullies fist bump her. A true leader would never laugh at the failure or demise of another and Bryan LOVED Danny riding the ass up the hill. Bryan’s unprofessional and a jerk and Bobby is a sociopath as his true nature came through in the end.

  26. Roxanne

    I think Danny thought communicating with guests helped the guests feel more like they were part of a family. Danny is all about family and I think that bleeds over into his job causing him problems. Bryan and Bobby act like high school bullies with Bryan being the biggest brown nose suck up ever. Bryan has no place managing females as he seems to get off on not only telling them what to do but staring them down as they do it. I would’ve shoved his arrogant ass overboard and not worried about yelling man overboard, because inherently shit floats, he would’ve been safe. And Jen, just tie the dam knot the way it’s taught in A/B and MMD classes.

  27. Celia Chavez

    Bobby and Hannah poorest excuses for supervisors, respect commands respect. Instead of taking their shipmates under they’re wings,they bullied them. Bobby’s a nasty drunk, and Hannah does have a very poor personality. The 3 bullies Bryan, Bobby , Hannah. Who was Danny going to run to? The Captain. The men were all chauvenistic , except Ben.I hope there’s some type of reprimand for these poor excuses for humans

  28. well danny liked making moments for people, so he got his way and made a big moment to remember at the end….great..riding off into the sunset on an ass. very suiting.. he was a punk kid who needed to grow up.

  29. Loves Below Deck

    From a mom/grandma perspective, Danny was entertaining. I loved his energy. He would make an excellent cruise director on a big ship. Bobby and Bryan frustrated me with the constant badgering/bullying of not only Danny but all the girls as well. My perfect crew would include for either Below Deck series: Captain Lee, Ben-chef, Julia, Tiffany and Amy as Stews in any order, Dave, Danny (yes, I would give him another chance), Connie and Jenn as deck hands in any order. What do you all like as your perfect crew? I LOVE this show!

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